Banished Divinity: Learning to be Human

He turned to me, and his expression shifted again—back to something warmer. Almost shy. "I'm amazed, honestly. You took on all of them. I've seen the injuries. That's not easy."

"Jaehyun," I said, cutting him off. "What exactly did you want to ask me? My parents are waiting."

This was true. I glanced toward the car.

Dad's face was pressed against the driver's side window. Not near the window. Pressed against it. His nose was flattened. His breath had fogged the glass. He looked like a very angry Magworm.

Mum was sitting in the passenger seat, shaking her head at him, her lips moving in what I assumed were soothing phrases like "They are young. Just leave them alone" and "If you break that window, you are paying for it."

I had never seen Dad look like that before. What is wrong with him?

"Oh yes!" Jaehyun snapped back to attention. "Right. I was wondering… are you free this weekend?"

I blinked. "Why?"

"I thought maybe we could grab ice cream. And just… hang out. With each other."

I opened my mouth to refuse. The word no was already forming on my tongue. It was a good word. A strong word. A word that had served me well across multiple dimensions and several millennia.

But before I could say it—

"YES!!!! OMG!! YESSSSS!!!"

Human Sera's scream was so loud that I felt my eardrums vibrate. She was floating two feet above the ground, her arms thrown wide, her face contorted in an expression of pure, unhinged joy. She looked like she had discovered eternal happiness and also found money on the ground. How did I know this? Tangled Menace once found a five-dollar bill and was beaming with sunrays shining through her head. Her face looked exactly like how Human Sera looked now.

"YES, SERA, SAY YES! SAY IT! SAY THE WORD! THE WORD IS YES! IT'S A VERY SHORT WORD! YOU CAN DO IT! I BELIEVE IN YOU!"

"Yes," I said.

The word came out of my mouth like a traitor escaping through a back door.

Jaehyun's face lit up. His smile was so wide it looked like it hurt. "Really?"

"Really," I said, already regretting everything.

"Yes!" Jaehyun pumped his fist. "Okay! Great! I'll text you the place and time!" He was already backing away, still smiling, still waving. "See you then, Sera!"

He turned and jogged off across the parking lot, his gym bag bouncing against his hip, his whole body radiating the kind of joy that should be illegal before breakfast.

Human Sera floated down beside me, her form practically glowing. "OMG. Sera. Thank you. Thank you for saying yes. I cannot believe you actually said yes. I thought you were going to say no. You looked like you were going to say no. Your whole face was saying no. But you said yes! YES!"

"I didn't voluntarily say yes," I said through gritted teeth. "You screamed into my ears. It was a reflexive response. Like a sneeze. Or a flinch."

"You love me," Human Sera laughed.

I did not respond.

But the truth was more complicated.

The truth was, I had found Human Sera's journal two weeks ago. It had been tucked inside her old backpack, hidden in a pocket behind a broken calculator and a dried-up pen. I had not meant to read it. But the journal had fallen open, and the last entry had been written the night Human Sera died.

The night she got struck by lightning.

She had written about Jaehyun. About how she had liked him for so long but had been too scared to say anything. About how she had planned to confess to him the next day at the concert which he had invited her to join him. She was very nervous and yet excited.

She had written a list. A bucket list. Things she wanted to do before she died.

• Confess to Jaehyun.
• Go on a proper date.
• Eat ice cream at that place by the river.
• Tell Mum and Dad I love them.
• Not be scared anymore.

I was a celestial being. I had existed for longer than mortal civilizations. I had seen empires rise and fall. I had watched stars burn out and be reborn. I had never felt guilt. Celestial beings did not feel guilt. It was beneath us. It was a mortal emotion, sticky and inconvenient, like honey on a clean surface.

But when I read that journal, something had shifted. Something had cracked.

A celestial being actually felt bad.

Not guilty. Celestial beings did not feel guilt. But something adjacent. Something that rhymed with guilt. Something that sat in my chest like a small, warm stone and would not go away.

So yes. I said yes.

Not because of the screaming. Not because of the reflex. But because Human Sera deserved one thing from her list. Because she was still here, still watching, still waiting, and she would never get to eat ice cream with Jaehyun in her own body.

But I could do it for her.

"Hey," Human Sera said, floating in front of me. Her voice was softer now. "You're thinking loud again."

"I am a celestial being. I do not think loud. I think with dignity."

"You're thinking about the journal, aren't you?"

I said nothing.

Human Sera's smile faded into something gentler. Something sadder. "You don't have to do this for me, you know."

"I am not doing anything for you."

"You're doing everything for me. And you're pretending you're not. And it's very sweet, but also very annoying, because I can't even hug you to say thank you because I'm a ghost."

"That sounds like a personal problem."

"It is. It really is." She floated closer. "But seriously, Sera. Thank you."

I looked at her. At the ghost who had been my unwanted companion, my annoying roommate, my surprisingly tolerable friend.

"Do not mention it," I said. "Ever."

"Deal."

"To anyone."

"Deal."

"I mean, if you tell anyone—"

"Who would I tell? I'm a ghost. My social circle is you and a fluffy green cutie."

I turned and walked back toward the car.

Mum was smiling. Dad was no longer pressing his face against the window, but his eyes were still narrowed. He looked like a man who had already prepared three different versions of a "welcome to the family, I have a shovel and I know how to use it" speech.

"Well," Mum said as I climbed into the back seat, "that seemed eventful."

"He is just a friend," I said.

"Friends don't ask friends for ice cream," Dad said.

"This one does."

"This one has good hair," Mum added.

"Mum."

"What? I have eyes."

Human Sera appeared in the seat beside me, her form flickering with happiness. "Mum likes him. Dad is going to murder him. This is going to be the best date ever."

"We are not calling it a date." I announced.

"You're going for ice cream. With a boy. Alone. That's a date." Dad spoke with what sounds like “He is out of the circle. I do not trust him.”

"It is a social engagement with frozen dairy products." I rolled my eyes as I explained

"That's a date, Sera." Mum giggled while looking at Dad’s reaction.

I stared out the window as the car pulled out of the parking lot. The campus lights faded behind us. The city spread out ahead, a blanket of gold and shadow.

Somewhere in the distance, a boy with damp hair and a judo bag was walking home, probably still smiling.

And somewhere beside me, a ghost was glowing with a happiness she had not felt in a very long time.

I told myself I was doing this for her.

And yet, why was my mind going back to Gate-Rammer?