Chapter 502: Playground Games
With her wide blinking eyes and a dress designed for twirling in a meadow, here was a girl whose innocent appearance could charm anyone who had never met me.
Carrying a bundle of stuffed toys in her arms, she could have shoved her way through Reitzlake’s market district and drawn nothing but smiles in her wake … especially when the punishment for not smiling was infernal damnation.
With a tidy little skip, she made her way across the rubble like a girl playing at hopscotch, before finishing with a small twirl and looking up at me with a smile.
“Little Miss Princess,” she said, blinking in feigned curiosity. “What a surprise to find you in the most dull corner of the hells. You seem very far from your tower. Are you lost, by any chance?”
I stepped away. Again and again.
But even with the size of the chamber, it wasn’t enough.
Her presence alone smothered the air like an alchemist’s smog. And I knew that neither the heavens nor the hells could offer me refuge, for no amount of distance could spare me from a smile so bright that every surface was compelled to reflect it.
“Ah, now there’s a lovely expression,” she said with a childish nod, her golden hair bouncing up and down. “Much better than when we last met. I believe you threw a chair at me. Or rather, your little helper did. Where might the clockwork doll be, I wonder? Or could it be that you’re all alone?”
She leaned forwards slightly.
The chandelier’s light retreated in answer, and yet her shadow only seemed to grow.
“… Oh dear. Has the princess been abandoned? And in such a dark place as well. A terrible thing. For I’m afraid it will only become darker still.”
It was all I could do to cover my mouth in horror.
“It’s … It’s you,” I said, a gasp escaping through my fingers.
“It’s me.” The little girl raised her arms, her stuffed animals flinging to the sides as she spun on the spot. “The cute visitor whose only wish was to play. And your response was to send me home. I was most upset. I’m not used to being told off.”
Her amusement was clear to see. A far cry from my last memory of her, dragged by the shackles of her own laws back to whichever playground she ruled.
“Why … Why are you here … ?” I asked in utter disbelief.
“Why? I thought that’d be obvious. I’m a devil and this is the hells. Why would I not be here? You banished me back, after all.”
The little girl looked genuinely puzzled. And so I realised the truth of it.
I’d underestimated her.
Severely.
All this time, I assumed she was a second rate devil out for mischief. But here at the bottom of the world, I could at last see the strength of the infernal being before me.
After all … for her to confidently reappear of her own accord after already being defeated meant she had to be the most shameless devil available!
“... H-How dare you,” I said, lowering my hands just so she could see my horrified expression. “If you know I’m here, you should be going in the other direction!”
The little girl giggled. I almost collapsed.
“Oh? But why would I do that when we’ve so much left to discuss?”
“Such as what? Compensation? Everything else has already been discussed! We did it upon a lousy theatre where you were dragged away by the dark powers that be! Your tale as a minor nuisance is officially done!”
“My tale is never done. It began in the smouldering flames of Tzalcarath, its infernal forges so ravenous that even the Winter Queen would be consumed. I will only come to an end when time itself does.”
“Incorrect! Your only role left is to look up at the sky whenever you see me passing by!”
“I don’t see why I should. There are no clouds in the hells to spoil our picnic.”
I threw up my arms in outrage.
“If you want a picnic, you need to ask in advance! Do you know how long it takes for Coppelia to prepare the proper smoothies? For a devil, she’ll need to empty my entire kingdom of suspicious berries first! ... Why, the gall to reappear before at least 500 years have passed is unbelievable! Could you not wait before troubling me again?”
“Time is meaningless. It wouldn’t matter if a day or a century passed. Why should I wait before seeking you out–especially when you’re here by my own wishes.”
The little girl turned to the hat merchant.
Standing behind his counter like a steward waiting to be fired, he appeared unfussed by the state of his emporium. Instead, he offered a humble bow as acknowledgement, his head angled towards a floating bucket I was certainly not going to wear.
It was enough to cause the little girl’s smile to fade by 30%. The biggest use he had so far.
“Welcome to the Emporium of Crowns. It’s a delight to–”
“[Razeel’s Perdition].”
Without warning, a lance wreathed in hellfire and smoke flew forth from the little girl’s palm.
It blackened the air, and then also the chest of the hat merchant as he was promptly hurled backwards, impaled into one of his own shelves to an explosion of splintering wood.
I clicked my tongue. My impression of the child rose by a minuscule amount.
“Do not bore me,” she said to her victim, eyes flashing with a crimson light. “I’ve not come to hear your platitudes, nor to tear down the walls you prepared. Did you forget our agreement?”
The hat merchant maintained his amicable smile, ignoring the copious amounts of blood dribbling from his own chest.
“I’d never dare dream of it,” he replied, as though accused of forgetting the chocolate sprinkles on a crêpe. “Our agreement is written in black and red. I would never forget.”
“Yet you chose which points to adhere to first. Did you truly think to keep her away from me?”
“My intentions are sincere. I merely wished to indulge in a moment of the princess’s time before I presented her for your collection.”
“Her time does not belong to you. It belongs to me. The Contract is now fulfilled.”
The hat merchant bowed.
A useful talent while impaled on a lance. But one made much less impressive by the shameless evidence of collusion. As he raised his head, an infernal contract flared into existence before him, its many lines of glowing script briefly illuminating the chamber.
A moment later, it was gone.
The parchment withered away in the blink of an eye, burning into something less than ash.
Naturally, I was appalled.
“Excuse me!” I said for anyone to answer. “Was there an infernal contract to kidnap me?”
The hat merchant adjusted his expression to look apologetic.
“Mortals. Devils. We are all prone to wishes, and I am particularly adept at granting them. I was made an offer. And in return, I provided the chance for this meeting.”
“Well, I see you truly meant it when you vowed your service to me! Why, I haven’t even accepted and you’ve already betrayed me! That is stunning efficiency!”
A snort came from the little girl, sparing her accomplice from having to offer an excuse exactly one syllable short of a lie.
“No, that is dull. Just as all this peddler does is. Even amongst devils, he is tedious, omitting enough words to fill all the shelves in his chamber while schemes ooze from his pores. He has a plan for you beyond his hats. But you can ignore him and all that he offers, as you should for all devils. Just not me.”
“Is that because you’re too oblivious to accept when I ignore you?”
“No, it’s because I am not a schemer. I’m impatient. And when there’s something I desire, I’m willing to pay even the prices this bore demands for his services.”
“Then I suggest a gluttonous horse for a steed. It'll help you learn financial prudence.”
“The price was very modest.”
“Unlikely. It is about to become your greatest expense. And I doubt you have the means to pay. But you needn’t worry. I have experience in dictating unreasonable financial repayment plans. Rejoice. You will never be able to pay it off, which means you will always be too busy drowning in debt to kidnap another princess. Your life of wholesomeness begins now.”
The little girl stared at me, her smile fixed.
And then–
“Ahahahhaahaha!!”
It became even wider as she broke into laughter.
She twirled on her heels, twisting and turning as though still upon her wooden stage, her golden hair flowing behind her as the daisies upon her circlet began to bloom.
Yet for all the laughter that came from her, not a single note of warmth could be heard.
“Oh, such breathtaking impertinence,” she said, as the laughter subsided. “How I wish there could be more like you. Even in the bottom of the hells, you’re still able to maintain yourself where all others would tremble and despair.”
“Trembling in despair is exactly what I’m doing. I thought I’d be kidnapped by a dragon. But it turns out it’s suitors, devils and fae I need to worry about. Each day is another reason not to leave my bedroom, except I also need to make a point of the consequences for those who force me out.”
The little girl almost threatened to laugh again.
Instead, she innocently leaned forwards, hands behind her back as she twisted on the spot.
“Hm? And what are the consequences? … You are no longer in your kingdom, Princess. You are in the hells. And the laws that protect you in the mortal realm do not apply here.”
I returned her smile with my own.
One sweet enough that all she could do was turn still to admire it.
“Ohohoho ... infernal laws were not written by mortals. They were written by devils. You should heed them. Because they are the only things keeping you safe from me.”
Silence answered as the little girl stared. Her smile slowly faded.
After a moment, she tilted her head slightly.
“Ahh~ I was simply going to murder you and be done with it. But I can feel the call that drives those same devils I insult. The temptation to ensure your suffering lasts for centuries on end, feasting on the cries of your soul until the last visage of you breaks. That is a gluttony I’ve rarely felt.”
“I caution against indulging. As a growing child, it wouldn’t do well to have an upset stomach.”
The little girl clapped her hands and beamed.
“A compromise, then! … Or a bargain offer, as the dullard would say. You are, I think, far too entertaining to murder. So let us play instead, here where few mortals tread and even fewer survive. Let us play hide and seek through the flames of oblivion. Let us hopscotch our way across the stones of the River Styx. Let us play house in the Valley of the Dead. Let us risk tag with the hellhounds of Infernus. And should you win, I shall personally escort you back to your kingdom. But should you lose, well–”
She blew up her cheeks, then just as quickly popped them.
It was clearer than anything else this devil offered, and so I nodded.
“Pass.”
“Really now! I suggest you think carefully. This is an offer I’ve no need to make. I do so purely out of respect. And also boredom.”
“I’m not here to satisfy your amusement. If it’s mindless entertainment you want, I suggest speaking to the Winter Queen. I’ve already given her advice. Lots of advice. Especially regarding her bedroom décor. Frankly, I already know yours is worse.”
“My bedroom is an infernal pit that stretches to the depths of The Last Descent.”
I let out a groan.
Devils and fae. Different worldly beings. Same lack of furniture.
“Well, there’s your problem. It sounds like you don’t even have shelves for a single book.”
“Books will not amuse me. You will. And that’s the only reason you live. I could destroy you with a smile or a thought. You do not know your peril, and you know even less the mercy I offer. Because now, I am in a wonderful mood. Something very rare when I have been banished back to the hells and all the dreary company you see.”
“The only other company I see is a devil whose entire existence revolves around selling hats. And between you and him, you are somehow the more dreary of the two. My congratulations. You have no idea how difficult that is to achieve.”
The little girl’s smile hardened.
“... Then, shall I make this more exciting for you?”
She took a step away, her innocent eyes blinking. She gave a final twirl.
A moment later–
Fwooooosh.
The shadows began to flee as white flames engulfed her form.
And the little girl began to grow.