Stray Cat Strut

If you want more to read, consider joining my Patreon! Or check out my other original works:

Stray Cat Strut (A cyberpunk system apocalypse!) - Ongoing

Fluff (A superheroic LitRPG about cute girls doing cute things!) - Ongoing

Love Crafted (Interactive story about an eldritch abomination tentacle-ing things!) - Completed!

Dreamer's Ten-Tea-Cle Café (An insane Crossover about cute people and tentacles) - Hiatus

Cinnamon Bun (A wholesome LitRPG!) - Ongoing

The Agartha Loop (A Magical-Girl drama!) - Volume Two Complete!

Lever Action (A fantasy western with mecha!) - Volume One Complete!

Heart of Dorkness (A wholesome progression fantasy) - Completed!

Dead Tired (A comedy about a Lich in a Wuxia world doing Science!) - Ongoing

Sporemageddon (A fantasy story about a mushroom lover exploding the industrial revolution!) - Ongoing

Past the Redline (A girl goes too fast, then she does it again) - Completed!

Magical Girl Crystal Genocide (Magical Girls accidentally the planet, and then try to fix it) - Completed!

Magical Girl Rending Nightmare (A sequel to Crystal Genocide! Cute girls in a soviet dystopia having a picnic on the roadside) - Volume Two Completed!

Noblebright (A shipcore AI works to avenge humanity) - Completed!

The Complicated Love Life of Ivil Antagonist (The Empress of Mars finds love) - Completed!

Pokebun (Broccoli Bunch in the world of Pokemon) - Hiatus

Queen Violence (An Assassin Reborn as a Kitten) - Completed!

No Strings Attached (An Elden Ring/Bloodborne inspired progression fantasy) - Ongoing

Save Scumming (A time-looping system apocalypse) - Ongoing

Hi! I don't usually do trigger-warnings, but I will for this one because... it seems sensible: Mentions of suicide in this chapter. Read at your own risk!

Chapter Twenty-Two - Justice Isn't Legal

"Sure, go ahead and take yourself out. Coward."

--Jack No Lantern, from the roof of Mega Building Mango Trees, 2032

***

"Wow," I said. "This is... actually just a relief."

"Pardon?" Walter asked.

I gestured to him and his buddies. "See, I thought there might be some sort of crazy conspiracy going on, and I guess I was right, but it's like, not a complicated one. You're just greedy fucks."

"Pardon?" Amos asked. "You can't just--"

"Shut the fuck up," I snapped before I started to walk forwards. A couple of them cowered back, but the rest didn't seem entirely aware of just how much danger they were in. I stepped over the back of the couch, between Franc and Jeanne, and then sat on the back edge, towering about those still sitting and forcing them to turn awkwardly to face me. "I believe in choices. In letting people do their own thing. At least, a little. I've also always been really annoyed when rich people just get away with shit. You know, I was only sixteen when I learned what the words golden parachute meant... okay, so that was like, two years ago, but still."

"You, ah," Walter said. He was staring at the couch.

"Yeah?"

"You didn't remove your boots."

I blinked, then stared, and yeah, I hadn't. I rubbed the edge of my boots on the all-white... was this leather? No, it was too soft and kinda fuzzy-looking. Velvet? Whatever, it looked expensive until I left footprints on it. "Who cares?" I said. "Look, I'm going to give you... three options. That's more than most people get, you know?"

"And these are?" Corrine asked. Of all the people here, I think she was the one taking this most seriously. Being in security, I think she probably understood the threat of a samurai or two showing up in your secretive meeting and making demands. It was better than the alternative, where we showed up and just started shooting, probably.

"Option one: I shoot you dead and then have to deal with all of the consequences of that. Those are annoying, though. It mostly involves undoing everything you've done."

"You want to kill us?" Jeanne asked. "We didn't do anything illegal?"

"This isn't about legality, it's about justice," I said. "They're different. Option two, you make things better. That means saying bye-bye to all of your privacy, and all of your riches. I'll be merciful and allow you to work in the militia. If you survive, then... you get to start over! You'll be broke, but you can pull yourself up by your bootstraps like the average person, right?"

"That's almost worse than just letting you kill us outright," Amos said.

"Feel free to test that," I replied before pulling out my Trenchmaker.

The gun being out of its holster ratcheted up the tension by a nice amount.

"Also, you might want to spill about any other collaborators now. It'll save me the trouble of chasing them down. I don't have a ton of time for this shit, I have a city to save, and every minute I'm here I'm not getting the job done, and that means less time back home not wearing pants and eating my girlfriend's cooking."

"What's the third option?" Corrine asked.

I had almost forgotten. "Hey, you," I said, pointed my unarmed-hand at one of the guards on the edge of the room. Then I pointed to one of the floor-to-ceiling window panels. "Open that up."

He looked at me, then the window, then back. "I can't?"

"Why not?"

"It... doesn't open."

"Oh," I said. Well, that was embarrassing. So I shot the window.

There was a lot of screaming and Jeanne and Franc fought for space on the floor as they dove down. The bullet cracked into the window and then ricohetted away, smacking into the ceiling before coming down somewhere behind me.

"Huh, tough windows," I said. Lower, I muttered so that only Myalis would hear. "Can I get a 'nade that'll blow that window out? We've got to have something for that, right?"

I think I can find something that'll take out a window and not the rest of the floor. Let's see...

New Purchase: Glassmelter Grenade

Points Reduced to: 9,386

The grenade that landed in my hand came in a box. It was shaped like a cat's head, with ears and an embossed cat face on the cover. I sighed, opened the case while studiously ignoring all the people staring, and pulled out a small grenade that was not much larger than one of those old D-cell batteries.

There was a button on it. I pressed it, and the grenade made a satisfying beeping noise before I underhanded it across the room. It clinked on the floor, then went off with a soft popping noise.

The window nearest the grenade shattered into fine, dusty particles a moment later that were sucked out into the city, then a moment later the pressure equalized and the room was buffeted by a strong, cold wind.

"There! Option three: Go out on your own terms, as long as those terms include walking out of that window."

"You can't be serious!" Amos said.

I shrugged. "I'm not Samurai Unserious, am I?" Wait, no, that was cringe to say, wasn't it? Damn, now I really wanted them to walk away from being a problem.

"Would it be possible to negotiate?" Corrine asked. She was taking this the calmest, at least on the outside.

"Maybe," I said. "But you've got to know that all the money in the world won't mean much to me."

"I understand that," she said. She had to raise her voice a little, over the constant noise of the wind. I shifted to the side as some little bit of paper flew past. The wind was really making a mess in the room. Corrine took in a deep breath. "I can understand that what we did was... perhaps inappropriate, but simply dissolving the leadership of so many of the biggest companies in the city will have an outsized impact. It'll be chaos."

"The city being overrun by man-eating aliens would also be pretty chaotic," I said. "Crisis Mode, you were on the front lines, how long do you think the walls would hold?"

Crisis Mode started a little at being addressed, but she answered after giving the question a moment. "Two days? Maybe three more days."

"Figures. And how many timezones away were you lot going to be in that time?"

The fact that only two of them had the decency to look guilty kind of pissed me off. "All three options mean we'll die," Jeanne said.

"Nah, it's like... two and a half," I said. "And just think, if there wasn't a suspicious media blackout, reinforcements would have arrived days ago, and your chances of surviving the second option would be so much better."

"She... is a little crude about it," Crisis Mode said before turning her attention fully onto the others. "But she's right. A lot of people died recently. We've been working very, impossibly, hard, to keep the city even a little safe. It's been almost impossible to keep things functional. If you hadn't been interfering, then..."

Walter licked his lips before trying on a smile. "I understand that you're upset, both of you, and with good reason, but we always knew that Quebec would be safe, that you'd rise to the occasion and save the city. Not all of us intended to run. Look at us now. If we planned on escaping, would we still be here?"

"Cute," I said. "So, which option are you picking?"

He swallowed. "Pardon?"

"I can make the choice for you," I replied. I didn't like killing people in cold blood, like how I didn't like brushing my teeth, but it was sometimes just something that you needed to do.

"What about jail?" Crisis Mode asked.

"You can't put the person that owns the jail in jail," I said.

Franc surprised me by standing up. He didn't say anything. He just tugged his lapels, raked his hand through his hair, then walked over to the window. He hesitated a few steps from the edge, face white, then he took three steps when there were only two left to take.

I looked away from the empty window and ignored the gasps from the peanut gallery. That leaves four of you," I said.

"Militia," Corrine said. "I'd suggest you take that option as well. You help no one by dying."

"I wouldn't say that," I replied before standing up. I placed a foot on the back of the couch, then hopped off and landed with a bend of the knees. "You have an hour to make it to... whatever passes for recruitment around here."

I didn't want to be here anymore.

There was a weird, twisting pit in my stomach, and I... I wanted to be home, hugging Lucy and not giving a shit. I blinked a few times, happy that I was still wearing my helmet before I stomped towards the exit, Crisis Mode following.

I wanted to find Shy, then get back to something simple. Not... whatever this was.

***