Chapter 140: I Never Existed In Your World
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Crystal green eyes sucked me in and I forgot to breathe, I forgot about everything else, even the world existed and I had eyes for the man before me, his mask shattered and all I could see was all parts of him, parts of him that didn’t lay strong, parts of him that laid cracked, crushing into pieces as his emotions blurred all over like the world was ceasing to exist in every minute.
Like everything was crashing down in his eyes and yet he cannot hold the pieces of it no matter how much he tried to hold them, but they were still meant to crumble and fall.
And I just stood there, watching the man I love to break into a showering mess with a single tear that slide down his cheeks, I knew for a fact I have been unconscious for days and barely had a heartbeat, but this wasn’t a tear of joy that struck him, but a tear of realization. A tear... knowing what would unfold and what he cannot accept. The inevitability.
He knows I’m going away
"Ava" a single mention of my name from his quaking voice and his broken tone got my heart splitting into million of pieces, I didn’t know what to do, I didn’t know what to say for if it was in my power I would stop it and it breaks me because I can’t, I can’t have my wish to be with him, I cannot, I cannot keep my promise, I was a sorry excuse of a wife who was about to break her husbands slow beating heart. Who was about to crash his world into no return.
I was about to bring everything down.
"I know who I am" I began and it was a failed attempt to sound strong, I was breaking with every breath I took. I cannot be strong, I wasn’t strong enough to do this but I had to. "I know everything" The tears I was trying so hard to hold back fell down my cheeks silently. My sobs echo in the room. I looked down at my glowing body and sniffed. "I-I don’t have much time left"
"N-No" he shook his head, like a child refusing to believe any words said, the pain bursting and he looked at me like I was a liar. Like what I was about to say wasn’t true and yet it was happening right before his eyes but he didn’t want to believe nor accept anything I have to say, he didn’t want it to be the reality. OUR reality, but it has been doomed from the start, it was never meant to happen and yet it did, it happened with him but to no end. There was never an end or a future.