Gaming Badly in DxD

“Where’s the idiot?” I sighed as the rift in space closed behind me.

I had to give Sona a quick rundown of what happened, and of course, I wasn’t letting her alone on the beach all of a sudden. So, after a quick rinse in the ocean, I just opened a tear in reality with a simple intonation of Portal Spear.

“Boss-man!” I came face-to-face with Sachi first. Her face was a mix of rage and worry, which only intensified the feeling in my gut. “Around here! We had Asia healing him constantly, but…”

‘Asia’s Twilight Healing wasn’t enough?’ I frowned.

As I walked into the room, I saw worried and sorrowful faces all around. Akeno’s lip was pressed into a thin line. Rias had a wrathful expression that made me pity Freed just a little. At the same time, Asia was on her knees, with her hands on top of a bleeding, barely conscious Kiba, who was just lying down on a blood-stained futon.

Surprisingly enough… I noticed a moving box in the corner of the room, but I didn’t have any time to pay attention to that.

“Z-zatren-san…” I heard Asia cry out as I kneeled right beside her and had Analysis give me an ample view of the situation inside Kiba’s body. “The bleeding just… won’t stop. Even if the wounds close, they re-open almost immediately!”

Yuuto Kiba

HP: [60%]

MP: [0%]

Status: [Holy Poisoning]. [Light Poisoning]. [Hemorrhagic Curse (High)]. [Magic Leak Curse (High)]. [Debilitating Curse (High)].

Almost the equivalent of a terminal magic disease. Kiba’s body has been poisoned via long and violent exposure to the power of a few Excalibur Fragments.

‘What the fuck.’ My eyes widened as I put Healing Touch to work alongside Asia’s Sacred Gear. ‘What do you mean by “a few”?!’

I cursed internally as I saw Kiba’s wounds close as if they were immediately stitched shut. Suddenly, his MP bar started to fill up with my own, and his HP shot past the eighty percent mark.

Only for it to come barreling down to fifty as all the Demonic Power I restored got drained. Kiba screamed as his wounds reopened, and steam started to come out of them along with rivulets of blood. As if…

‘As if the damn injuries were feeding on my MP to injure him further.’ Once realization hit, I stopped healing Kiba immediately. “Asia, stop. We are making it worse.”

Asia flinched back as if burned. I gave a glance at Rias, who went to Asia’s side just as her eyes filled with tears. I would also comfort the girl, since there was no way she could have known… but I had a dying friend on my damn hands.

‘What do I do?’ I frowned.

When I stopped healing him, Kiba’s HP lowered at a much slower rate. Apparently, that was only the Poisoning. Now that I could check his status with a bit more patience, I noticed that whatever the heck “Magic Leak” was, it must be the thing using my magic to somehow ‘empower’ the poison and the bleeding.

If this was the work of an Excalibur, I was damn glad I had become a Deus, because with my mana pool, I would have been eaten alive from the inside with a nick of this thing.

“Zatre…n…” I blinked at Kiba’s raspy voice. Even in this state, the blonde Knight’s eyes sparkled with fury and pure vitriol. “I…”

“Shut up, Prince.” I huffed while I put Analysis and Thought Acceleration to work in tandem. “Save your strength. You can tell me all about whatever this ‘Holy Sword Project’ is later.”

Kiba faltered, eyes widened, jaw clenched shut. I haven’t gotten the details since I wasn’t looking for them. But the mention of me knowing was more than enough for Kiba to fall into silence.

Breath in… Breath out.

Multiple slashing cuts. Clean, thin cuts. Puncture wounds. Made with a thin sword. Made with a Holy Blade—

I need to go deeper than that. What did the Excaliburs do, exactly?

Poison. Light Poison. Holy Poison. Weakening Curse. Bleeding Curse. Mana Leak Curse.

Go further. Curses. What can I do against them?

Curses are powerful spells not easily removed. Curses are able to be cleansed. Curses have a disgusting, dread-filled feeling to them. Curses are weak to Holy Power. Curses are weak to Divine power.

‘There!’ I grinned, deactivating the combination of skills and instead focusing on my small well of Divine Energy. ‘Just like I did with Stealth hours ago…’

“Kiba, this is going to hurt like a bitch.” I warned, not really knowing what would happen, but without much time to try.

“Zatren-kun?” I heard someone, Akeno, I believe? Behind me, as I started focusing. “What are you—”

“Through this pain must burn. I shall raise your will as if it were the Sun.” The first verse, I used to buff Kiba’s pain tolerance. His groaning came to a halt momentarily, so I took the chance to add one more. “Filth of a Curse. With my will, your power I’ll coerce. And with this blessing, your presence shall disperse…!”

It was the first time I tried a three-verse buff. But it worked, as the Curses from Kiba’s status dropped by an entire grade. From High to Medium.

And now came the difficult part.

I imbue my hands with Healing Touch while also channeling my Divinity through them. It wasn’t particularly easy, but it was much more so than with my Stealth. Probably because on a base, deeper level, my Domain was much more related to healing.

I placed my hands on top of Kiba’s body. And the fiery orange, almost red color of my Skill fused with the golden hues of my Divinity.

Kiba screamed, but even as he did, his status effects kept disappearing one by one. First, it was the debuffs and poison. His wounds steamed with purple and whiter hues. Then, the steam was completely black, as the Curses were burned away by my power.

I haven’t noticed how much I was sweating, or how much time passed. I only know that at some point, a wet rag was placed on my head, and that I felt somewhat feverish.

Kiba had fallen unconscious due to the pain. But his HP rested at a comfortable ninety percent once more. His MP was halfway full, his ailments were completely gone, and only barely visible scars remained where there were once unmendable wounds.

I took a shaky, deep breath, using the rag to clean my face. When I got up and turned around, I received shocked, relieved, and worried expressions all around.

“Well…” I sighed. Considering my options before deciding that, instead of letting any of this bullshit come to pass again, it was better to come clean. “Better round up everyone available. It’s best if I explain a single time instead of multiple.”

“Explain… what?” Sachi asked, but I saw both Sona’s and Rias' eyes narrow in thought.

“That we have a Rogue Cadre on the loose.”

This is going to suck.

-X-x-X-

‘’That took so damn long…’’ I groaned as I approached my home. It was weird, only being away for a bit, but feeling somewhat nostalgic. ‘’Sona’s face was funny, though.’’

My explanation went… a lot better than I expected. I was expecting shouts, anger, outrageousness—Though there was a bit of that—And instead, I got a stare down from Rias, while Sona sulked in the corner.

‘’I’m sorry for lying.’’ I offered to Rias’s pointed stare. Believe me, if this woman were staring at you with something as mild as disappointment, you would feel your heart break a little. ‘’I promise to tell these things in the future…?’’

Rias stared me down some more. Much to the amusement of my friends. Who, while they took the information with calm shock, were now behind Rias, enjoying the show.

‘’…I knew you were doing something idiotic.’’ Rias huffed, dropping her posture before poking my chest. ‘’This is a mess and a half, but we cannot just leave our territory here in Kuoh unprotected. Especially after Kiba. So, you will keep me updated, do you understand?’’

‘’Yes ma’am!’’ I saluted.

So, yes, better than I thought.

At last, I was let go with merely a slap on the wrist—And a kiss and hug from a Rias who missed me plenty—before I decided to finally get home and check on the ones I haven’t seen yet.

Rei, my little spider daughter. Koneko, who wasn’t present during my explanation, and that little guy, Kuroro, whom I haven’t seen in a bit now.

There was also Aika, who, if I was to assume correctly, was moving into our home soon.

‘’Rei? Where’s my cute daughter at?’’ I called out as I stepped into my home.

It hasn’t been that long since I last saw her, but could you blame a father for missing his daughter? Not only that, but I left without properly familiarizing myself with Kuroro, too. That little Hydra must have grown a bit, at the least.

‘’In the living room, father.’’ Rei’s flat voice reached my ears through the walls.

With a smile and open arms, I opened the door.

‘’Now, how have you been doing, dea— Holy shit!’’ My eyes widened in shock as I took in the scene.

Hanging from the ceiling was Rei in her Arachne form. Her hair covered part of her face, making her look like that one girl from that scary movie. But that wasn’t the most shocking part of it. Instead, it was the bear-sized dragon with four heads that was currently snapping its jaws at a ball made out of silk that Rei was moving from above.

One simple look and a check of my status told me that this was Kuroro.

‘HOW?! Three days ago, this little dude didn’t cover my palm!’ And now he was massive, bigger than me, and had an extra head. Not only that, but my words were a distraction enough for the Hydra to turn in my direction. ‘’…Hey there, bud.’’

A gust of air buffeted my hair back as one of the heads approached me and huffed directly in my face. Then, another one, but from the left. The third one appeared from above, and the fourth one I could notice was behind me.

If anything, this told me that Hydra’s necks were very flexible.

The dragon took one sniff at me. Actually, each head took its own sniff. And even then, I was reminded that each head supposedly was its own individual, though there was always one that acted as ‘the leader’.

I took one look upwards at Rei, and for some reason, she had a proud smile on her face that made me want to pinch her cheeks.

Shrugging, I reached for what I guessed was the ‘main’ head and petted it. Because that’s what humans (ex-human, I guess) do when confronted with possibly deadly creatures.

We pet them till domestication.

I didn’t make the rules; I only sometimes followed them.

The main head blinked. His fearsome dark eyes faltering, and its maw of sharp teeth closing. Followed by another sniff.

‘’…Papa?’’ A terrifying, Deep, and reverberating voice spoke. It was the main head. ‘’…Papa!’’

…Did I just get another child? No, wait a minute, why do I feel like this is Rei’s fault?

‘’Papa!’’ The dragon roared with twice the intensity before tackling me not through the door, but through three walls and into the backyard. Two of the other heads ‘hugged’ me by interlocking around my torso, and the main one basically licked at my face. ‘’…Papaa…’’

I stared at the sky, feeling two thousand pounds of happy Hydra pressed against my chest while recognizing myself as its father. And even then, the fourth head decided to show his affection by… munching on one of my shoulders.

To absolutely no damage, thankfully. Kuroro grew big, but he was not strong enough yet to pierce through my flesh with his jaws, much less so as he was apparently just… very happy to see me.

‘’Mama raised no bitch, and definitely not a quitter.’’ I nodded to myself before hugging back the Hydra. ‘’My son! Look how much you’ve grown! Who’s a big, murderous Hydra?! Whose dad’s murderous hydra?! You are!’’

A moment later, I was joined by Rei. She also seemed to want a hug from her father.

Staring at the sky, hugging my two monster children after healing a friend from the brink of death, and acknowledging that tomorrow at the latest I may be attacking a terrorist organization, possibly alongside some of my friends, I had a singular thought.

‘This is fine.’ I shrugged. Petting both Rei and Kuroro. ‘Maybe this is what Loki felt? Dude had like three monster children, right— No, wait, one was a horse, and he gave birth to that one.’

Maybe crazy shit just happens to Gods in general?

-X-x-X-

‘’So, when were you going to tell me I have a son now?’’ I stated accusingly in fake offense, even crossing my arms, at the girl currently gazing sleepily from the bed. ‘’I’m waiting~’’

Koneko, the only one who missed my explanation earlier. She really was sleeping more than she should be. And now, I knew it was all thanks to that Youkai pregnancy thing… Which really fucks me over because I didn’t plan to have to save one of my friends from death’s door just after a date.

I was honestly pissed the fuck off. But that would do jack-shit to actually solve this issue. I could only wait for Azazel to say the word.

Because you better believe I’m the one who’s going to poke the sleeping bear. If it were up to me, I’d blow the base to smithereens.

So, in reality, it’s a good thing that it wasn’t up to me.

‘’Senpai…’’ Koneko purred, doing grabby motions, even though I could see the smugness in her eyes and the way her tail flicked laz—

The way her tails flicked lazily. One, two. Yep, those are two tails, not one, nor three, but two.

Did my cat get stronger because she… literally slept through most of the week while absorbing life energy from the natural environment? Is that a thing? I don’t think that’s a thing.

I ignored the existential crisis I had right now about power napping buffing stats somehow to get into bed and embrace the sleepy cat instead.

Koneko, while sleepy, was a whole other menace. She needed her warmth and cuddles. And she either gets them willingly or she attaches herself to your side like a particularly cute leech and rests there.

And I dare you to try and pry her away. She knows how to grapple.

So, that meant the moment my arms surrounded her, she had a tight grip on my entire torso with her small arms, and her legs got intertwined with mine. Also, those flicking tails decided that my arms were better covered by their extra layer of fur, so it was like the world's toastiest and most threatening blanket.

‘’Yeah, missed you too, you lazy kit-cat.’’ I chuckled, getting only a small smile in return. Koneko cuddled up to my neck, and I just let her and basked in the warmth. ‘’…So, about these sleepy episodes you’re having. I think I know of a way to fix them.’’

Without waiting for an answer, I kept going. ‘’Apparently, it’s some sort of biological/spiritual things that Yokai do to get life energy from nature, I guess, to sort of ‘feed’ nutrients to the child.’’

Or, at least, that’s what I got from Kuroka’s explanation.

‘’…So I’m like this. For not using Senjutsu?’’ Koneko hummed against my neck, and I nodded.

I cannot really skip that training session with Kuroka. I need to help Koneko as soon as possible. I didn’t know if this would only get worse with time until she finally gave birth, but the risk of us coming into contact with crazy zealots with powerful holy swords was huge now. And I know what Holy swords do to devils and Yokai. The information fed into my brain clearly stated ‘evil creatures’, and the little Japanese spirits certainly have that reputation.

It's like a damn quad-weakness in Pokémon. I am not risking shit.

‘’Senpai…’’ I haven’t noticed the little hand now clutching my shoulder. I looked down, seeing Koneko frowning with a glint of steel in her eyes. ‘’You… know my sister, don’t you?’’

My body and mind came to a halt. Just what? How—

‘’Your smell.’’ Koneko followed with a sigh, as if she had not only answered my thoughts but also suspected something from the start. ‘’There was one day. A month back or so. You smelled strange, like life energy. It felt familiar.’’

…

‘That’s when that damn black cat bit me!’ I remembered now. That interaction ended with her biting into my collarbone. I thought nothing of it when the mark disappeared after a small use of Healing Touch, but apparently, I was not only fooled, but fucked over, too! ‘’Koneko, I can explain.’’

The white-haired cat simply stared into my eyes, searching for something, before looking down. ‘’I… think I know now.’’ She huffed shakily, her hands holding me tightly, like I was a pillar for support. ‘’Sister didn’t go crazy because of the Senjutsu… did she?’’

Just from where is she taking all these clues from? I haven’t even said anything!

However, that didn’t mean I would just lie to her face. Kuroka was weird, that’s for sure. However, ‘bloodthirsty cat, eager for flesh, carnage, and life energy’ didn’t really fit there. She just has a really big strength kink and wants to be a mother badly.

‘’She didn’t. It’s practically a fact. I knew it the moment I could properly ‘read’ her information with my eyes.’’ I confirmed, and boy, was I glad that I revealed that ability early on. Otherwise, I couldn’t even explain half the shit I knew about. ‘’…I’m sorry for not telling you sooner. You were so hesitant about it, and the least I wanted to do was suddenly dismiss the years of hardship you had, or break your worldview so suddenly.’’

‘’I’m… not good with this, Koneko.’’ I pet her as she raised a curious eyebrow. ‘’I’m shit at comforting people when it comes to mental issues that I cannot punch away. If the problem comes from a bastard doing something or a particular object, monster, or anything like that. I can resolve it, but this…’’

‘’Stop trying to fix everything yourself, Senpai.’’ Koneko separated for a bit, poking my cheek with one of her tails, much to my befuddlement. ‘’You can’t. Nobody really can. But I trust your word and I trust you, so…’’

The underlying message was there. ‘So, I’ll believe what you’re saying right now.’ Basically, accepting that her sister wasn’t just a monster, and that there must be something else going on.

‘’What did I do to deserve such a perfect girl?’’ I teased, because I refused to acknowledge the warm beating of my chest or my flustered face. I won’t! I’ll never! ‘’What? Trying to make me fall for you again, you little shit?’’

‘’I guess I’m just built like that.’’ Koneko grinned.

‘’Built like a bonsai lumberjack, maybe.’’ I shot right back.

‘’Don’t see Senpai complaining about height when he grabs my ass.’’

‘’That’s just because all your height points went straight to making it the perfect butt-to-body ratio.’’

‘’Built. Like. That.’’

I chuckled, enjoying the banter as the tense air dispersed. Koneko nuzzled back into my once more with a happy sigh. Yet, I still felt curious about something.

‘’What gave me away?’’ Koneko made a questioning sound. ‘’I mean, it couldn’t be just smell anyway, right? You should have noticed something else.’’

‘’Senpai, three days ago, you didn’t know shit about Life Energy or Senjutsu.’’ Koneko deadpanned. ‘’All of a sudden, you know what ails me. Your life energy hasn’t changed at all, and I refuse to believe you gained Senjutsu mastery in days.’’

I raised a finger—

‘’And if you could discern it with your eyes, you would have done so sooner.’’ And I lowered my finger right back down. Damn.

‘’Fair.’’ I conceded the point, but not before giving an ample smirk and channeling Divine Energy directly into my lips, and pressing a kiss to her forehead. It was quite funny, seeing her blink, as a golden mark of a kiss appeared on her forehead. Only for it to disappear a moment later as Koneko’s body took in my blessing. ‘’Blessed cat. Call it Shuku-Neko~‘’

Koneko scoffed before hugging me tighter. ‘’That means ‘congratulations’, not blessing. Idiot-Senpai.’’

‘’Meh, tomato tomato.’’ I shrugged. Then, I remembered something. ‘’We still have to attend that one doctor appointment, right?’’

My words made Koneko groan and hide away in my clothes. She even zipped the jacket from the inside and only poked her head and eyes outside. The rest was hidden by my oversized leather clothes.

Who knew cat Youkai disliked the ‘’vet’’ just as much as regular cats? Cute.

‘’Now, that’s adorable, but we still need to—‘’

My phone rang, just one time, and by the sound, it was a message from… Sachi?

NoMagic4You: Boss! Help!

I frowned. Koneko simply made herself comfortable and peeked at my phone from above the rim of my jacket.

RandomBullshitGo: What happened???

NoMagic4You: Kiba is gone! Straight up disappeared!

NoMagic4You: Asia went to bring him something to eat a few minutes ago, and he wasn’t there.

NoMagic4you: Please help! The boss lady has a scary face, and she disintegrated the table already!

…

RandomBullshitGo: I’m on it.

‘’That dumb son of a bitch…’’ I groaned, resting my jaw against Koneko’s hair and feeling her ears twitch against my cheeks at the contact. ‘’Kiba, this is not a fucking anime. I’m going to call you so many names because of this, I swear to Michael.’’

‘’I’ll help,’’ Koneko muttered with an equally tight frown. I know those eyes, and she’s damn pissed.

‘’In insulting him or tracking him down?’’ I offered, unzipping my jacket and changing Weapon Forms to my HourglassPike.

‘’Yes.’’

‘’Good enough for me.’’ I sighed.

Seriously, dude. I’m starting to get angry at this bullshit. There’s no shot I leave Kiba running around alone after what Freed did to the idiot. And considering that there’s a chance that he or those Fallen Generals of Kokabiel have Sacred Gears?

I’m dragging this idiot back. Either talking it out or duking it out.

-X-x-X-

-Yuuto Kiba-

I gritted my teeth in anger. Yet, even through it, I made sure to keep myself undetected by regular humans. It won’t do, even through this ugly feeling, to just make a scene.

Sword Birth answered my call as a giant black sword manifested in my hands just as I entered the less populated part of Kuoh.

‘The bastard should be around here. He must.’ I thought as I dashed through the hallways, crossing hundreds of meters of distance in mere seconds. Yet, even as I came back to the scene, came across the bloody alleyway where I had found that madman, there was no one. ‘’No…’’

My legs easily carried me through the area. Always quickly but thoughtfully checking each nook and cranny. The pommel of my blade creaked as I put a bit too much strength into it. And no matter where I looked or for how long. That exorcist was gone.

And with him, the opportunity I had been looking for, to get rid of those damn Holy Blades once and for all.

I stopped at an empty alley. Unlike the few I checked, there was no blood in here. Only dirt, trash, and even a stray cat that ran off the moment I slammed my blade into the solid brick wall.

A scream tore from my throat as I angrily slashed the dilapidated wall apart. It wasn’t just because of what I lost against. Even if the feeling was one of, if not the most awful I’ve ever felt, no.

It was just who was wielding those blades, a crazy man, sure, but one who knew. One who was aware of what happened to me, to my friends.

…And still laughed.

When I was on patrol, bright and early in the morning, I found a corpse. From an exorcist no less. Their body had traces of holy energy in the wounds.

An awful feeling settled in my stomach as I frowned. Yet, a bout of raspy, crazed laughter cut through the silence. And I had immediately created a blade, Holy Eraser, in my hand.

‘’Man, these blades sure are something, kekeke~!’’ The silver-haired man shouted as a thin, shining blade tore through the air with flashing speed. If I hadn’t stepped to the side in time, that blade would have torn directly through my neck. ‘’Ha? And here I thought I was going to get bored! A devil scum! A perfect target to use my blades on. Though… such bad luck, that you weren’t one of those hot chicks… Bad luck, bad luck! Kahahahah~!’’

I frowned at the exorcist's ugly, toothy smirk. His clothes looked pristine if it wasn’t for the blood in them. His face, however, was covered by a black visor with glowing blue lines.

Even if I hadn’t seen this man before, the description fit a bit too well. Crazy silver-haired exorcist that spoke disgusting words with each breath.

This must be the man who was with the Fallen when they kidnapped the Sacred Gear wielders. Yet, his… vocabulary, and considering his involvement with both Sachi and Asia’s almost demise.

It made me want to shut him up for good. That was until I looked at the blades he was carrying and the energy they radiated off.

And now? Now my blood boiled.

In one hand, the man held a thin, golden, one-handed sword. It looked European, yet its design was strange. With a blade too thin for the handle it resided in, and the golden glow emanating off it was something else. Something dangerous.

On the other hand, rested an equally holy, yet much different sword. It was a rapier, with intricate designs and patterns that made me remember a ceremonial sword. Used only on specific occasions or merely to serve as interior décor. But just like the previous one, there was no mistaking them.

Those were Excaliburs.

‘’You indeed have bad luck, encountering me of all people.’’ I almost chuckled, focusing on Sword Birth and the sheer hatred I held for these blades.

The previous Holy Eraser in my hand fell apart, replaced by two, much better, much more powerful versions in the form of twin sabers. ‘’I must thank you for bringing those accursed blades to our territory. Now, I have all the excuses I need to break them into pieces.’’

‘’Ha…? Did you fall on your head as a child— Oh, wait! Waitwaitwait! You’re that devil scum! The one the good old doctor talked about! Oh, man, oh man! That’s hilarious!’’ I froze, my knuckles turning white as my grip on the swords tightened. ‘’HAHAHA! Look at your face! You really are that one! The one who got away! Aww, don’t cry, poor little piece of shit! You’ll see those dead kiddos in heaven! Oh… wait. You WON’T! HAHAHA!’’

After that, I… didn’t remember much besides the rage, the pain as those blades not only broke through my Holy-cancelling swords after a few clashes, but made deep cuts on my skin.

Even as the fight dragged out, and I employed any and every Demonic Sword I could think of, my body felt sluggish with every clash, and somehow, the exorcist was getting faster. When I came to be, I was left bleeding on the ground, left to die like a mutt.

The bastard hadn’t even finished the job. He just left. It was a fortune that I had managed to hold on long enough to teleport and have Asia help me until Zatren—

‘’You’re a pain in the ass to track, Kiba.’’ I halted, one step out of the alleyway, before I had to turn around.

‘Speak of the devil, and he shall appear…’ I huffed.

There, on the other entrance, was the black-haired man, spear in hand, and an annoyed expression. ‘’If you’re out here, I would guess that means you’re nice and dandy after this morning. No need to thank me, I’m awesome like that.’’ Yet, even if the words were meant to sound cheerful and arrogant, Zatren’s tone of voice didn’t follow along. If anything, it sounded like he was forcing himself to say them.

‘’…Don’t think I’m that much of a pain. Considering how quickly you found me.’’ I shot back, offering a bitter smile. ‘’You’re here to bring me back, are you not?’’

‘’Are noodles tastier with sauce or with petrol?’’ Zatren’s eyes rolled in exasperation as he stepped forward. ‘’You can attribute the quick search to Koneko. You almost made her miss her doctor’s appointment. I would have smacked you over the head for that alone. Alas, it’s a good thing she could sniff you out. I prefer to find my friends while they’re still breathing, after all.’’

I frowned. Staring him right in the eye. His words… They were like he was sure that if he didn’t find me in time, I might as well be dead. And while a part of me was thankful for his worry, the other part, the one who cursed at not finding that dimmable exorcist again, was bitter and angry at the quick dismissal of my strength.

‘’It’s a shame that I don’t plan to go back.’’ I casually commented. That made his frown worse. ‘’I’m under no illusions that I could win in a one against one, Fumigami. But you already know that, right? Like you know everything, apparently.’’

Zatren, too, knew. That’s why his lips pressed into a thin line and his next step faltered by a second. Because he knew about my quest for revenge, not because I told him, but because he somehow ripped it off my being, like I was an open book for him to read.

‘’So, you may take me back now.’’ I shrugged. Knowing perfectly well he could. ‘’But can you also monitor me every day, at every hour of the day? Of the week?’’

He said nothing. And, to be fair, I believed that he may somehow develop a form to actually do so, but it was the intent behind the words that mattered.

‘I won’t stop. No matter if you drag me back kicking and screaming. Not until I get my revenge. For my friends.’

A moment of silence hung heavily in the air. For a moment, I even thought that Zatren would give up. That he would actually let me go. Sure, that would make me a rogue, and it hurt to do such a thing to Rias-bucho, considering just how thankful I was to her, but… I just couldn’t go back like this.

I would snap at someone or somebody, and my friends were not ones deserving of my ire.

‘’Haa…’’ He sighed before his spear changed form. Yet, instead of a flashy, strange, maybe outright stupid weapon. It changed into an ornate, small spear. The one Zatren called the BasicSpear, an unpowered form of his Sacred Gear. ‘’This is why we need a therapist. Rias is way too lenient and caring for this, and I’m way too stupid and awkward with it.’’

‘’So, I’m not going to tell you all about camaraderie, about how we should stick together, and how everything will be fine eventually, because that’s bullshit. And you’re not going to eat anything of that up, are you, Isaiah?’’

I froze and stared daggers at the man. ‘’You…’’

‘’Instead. I’ll do this.’’ Zatren pointed his weapon at me with a smile, a small, but real one. ‘’If you can land a single hit on me. I’ll let you go— No. I’ll help you somehow steal an Excalibur, and I’ll shatter it to pieces myself if need be.’’

My body paused, yet my mind was reeling with the possibility. I alone may not be enough, but Zatren…? If there was a person I believed could shatter an Excalibur from one day to the next, it would be this man.

‘’And if I don’t manage to?’’ I asked while forming Fiery Storm on my off-hand, a sword that mixed wind and fire to create a hellish hurricane, while on the other hand, I had the Root Sword, so I could absorb any magical attack and throw it back.

Zatren’s smile got wider. ‘’If you don’t manage to hit me before I knock you out, then you come back with me, and you don’t do this shit ever again. At least, not alone.’’ He got into a defensive position, spear ready to deflect at any moment, while his offhand went inside his pocket.

‘This man…’ Koneko calling Zatren a ‘’disrespectful asshole’’ was indeed accurate. The challenge was clear. He would not use his left hand in this battle. ‘’Zatren-kun. I think you’re right with that therapist. After all, your ego is so big it may be causing some sort of mental illness.’’

‘’Bite me, blonde Kirito.’’ He scoffed good-naturedly.

‘’That joke is getting stale.’’ I pushed back with a smile of my own. ‘’But sure, gladly.’’

One step forward, and a bunch of dark, shadowy swords erupted from the ground. And from each blade, a wolf made out of pure dark shadows came out. An idea I stole from Zatren’s own water summoning.

For a moment, I could forget my quest for revenge. After all, sparring with Zatren was always oddly invigorating.

-X-x-X-

-Zatren Fumigami-

I took a single look at the dozen or so shadow wolves now flooding through the narrow alleyway. An interesting thing is that summons apparently had their own stats.

And sadly for Kiba, these guys did not have enough CON for this.

‘’Water Surge.’’ From my pointed spear, a spiral-like geyser erupted and slammed directly into the roaring beasts. They didn’t stand a chance; the swords they had been summoned from also broke apart under the water pressure. And Kiba would have been hit if he hadn’t jumped and deployed his wings to evade.

With amusement, I turned my spear upwards. Literally shooting the water as a canon, trying to nail down the dude— Pause.

Trying to hit him with the half-muttered incantation before he narrowly dodged to the sides.

As Kiba fell from the sky, fire sword in hand, I made enough water to cover a few meters in all directions.

‘’Ha!’’ He swung the angry red blade, but the moment fire started encompassing the air, I erected a water bubble and watched as the fire turned to steam on contact alone. ‘’What?!’’

The fiery storm that once may have been a threat simply did not have enough raw Demonic Power to go through my bubble. It wasn’t even a proper barrier, just a bunch of water put together. The equivalent of just using my mana to block the attack.

And, as Kiba came crashing down…

‘’FUS-RO!’’ I send him right back up, the thorn-like sword in his hand shattering at the point of impact. I taunted the now dazed and—if the blood seeping through his ears was any indication— eardrum-ruptured Kiba. ‘’Slow!’’

I wasn’t even taunting him. Compared to Vali, Kiba was way slower. Though half of that could have been attributed to my reduced stats at the time. However, that didn’t impede me any as I used Reinforcement on my legs and took to the sky.

Pointing my weapon-wielding hand forward, I frowned as Kiba made another sword. This time, it was a wicked-looking one. With sharp edges and… ‘Is that a dragon?’

‘’Dragon…’’ I blinked as the purple miasma surrounding the blade transformed into a dragon made out of that same miasma, with angry red eyes that locked onto my form before shooting through the air, jaws wide open. ‘’Buster!

I couldn’t help but chuckle and lazily gesture.

‘’[Dragon Buster V]’’ I watched in amusement as a laser of green energy pierced through his miasma cleanly and passed through the abandoned street.

Kiba dodged to the side right on time, as just a second later, the entire street was blown to smithereens by the after-shock of my Hero Skill. Frowning, I conjured water to extinguish a few fires I had created by simply releasing the attack into Kiba’s general direction.

‘’…Think I should take a moment to acclimate to my power, for real.’’ I blinked, dodging to the side at the last second as I saw, practically in slow motion, a black, serrated sword pass through the place where my head had been just a second ago. ‘’Pointy~’’

In retaliation, I moved. I didn’t Shadow Step, no. I simply moved with a beat of my wings, and I had enough time to see Kiba attacking my afterimage and looking shocked at my sudden disappearance.

This was our current power disparity, and why I left the condition as loose as ‘hit me once’.

Kiba could be doing this all day, and I’ll simply have to run circles around him until he falls from exhaustion. I was simply too much for the current him. Which was why I didn’t just let him be in the first place.

‘’Enough.’’ I sighed. Considering my interrupted date in such a passionate moment. Kiba almost dying on me, having to tell all of that to Koneko, explaining to my lovers and friends why I was chasing down a damn Cadre, and now this? ‘’I’m fucking tired, I’m running late for that appointment with Koneko, and I want a nap. Preferably, on one of my girl’s thighs.’’

‘’This is not—‘’ I cut through Kiba’s half-mustered snark with a single move.

The blonde Knight looked down in shock as I completely blitzed him down and placed a hand on his chest. Sure, at this distance, he could try and cut me down. Even a graze with his blade would be enough to secure him the ‘win’.

It was too bad that even at this distance, he was outspeed.

Gods, even Godlings or Half-Gods, have many boons in common. There are common divine resistances, and even the use of Divine Energy and artifact crafting.

Another trait is the capacity to use the Holy Element. Something that will always be between debilitating and deadly to any ‘evil’ species. An energy that I had now just barely infused into my palm.

With a push, I planted that open palm on Kiba’s chest. Hard.

Kiba wheezed, sword dropped in favor of clutching his chest. His eyes became hazy as consciousness slowly left him. Before he fell, however, I grabbed onto his arm. He looked up, with half-closed eyes, before speaking.

‘’…Fucking… bullshit…’’ And he fell unconscious.

‘’I sure fucking am.’’ I sighed and glided to the ground. Admiring, or more like staring in annoyance, at the destruction I had caused on the street. ‘’Thank fuck for Kuoh having all these homes, with zero people in them. God bless the lack of population.’’

With a sigh, and carrying the blonde over my shoulder, I started calling Sachi to tell her I had resolved the issue.

I also added Kiba to my Party. Because if this dumb fuck wanted to go toe to toe with Excalibur Wielders and High-Class Fallen on the level of Rias or greater, then I had to powerlevel the fuck out of him.

‘’Hope I’m not too late for that appointment…’’

-X-x-X-

Bonus Scene: One potato? No, three potatoes!

-Koneko Toujou-

‘’Miss Koneko Toujou, right? Please come on in.’’

I stepped into the Doctor’s room. Apparently, Rias-bucho managed to get one of the Sitri’s best for me. I was thankful, as much as I didn’t like to come.

‘’Excuse me.’’ I nodded in thanks. Then, as the woman in scrubs gestured to a stretcher, I took a seat. ‘’The father is running late, sorry.’’

Damn you, Kiba, I didn’t have my comfort idiot to deal with this situation!

‘’It’s no problem. Now, let’s start with some questions, alright? Did you have any abnormalities in these early stages?’’ The Doctor asked with a smile, clipboard in hand, to take notes. ‘’Any dizziness? Stomach pain? Cravings?’’

‘’...I get tired easily. And once I wake up, I’m… very hungry.’’ I nodded. It was kind of awkward to tell this to a complete stranger.

‘’I see, I see…’’ She started writing. ‘’Any sort of discomfort? For us, devils, there are sometimes when our ‘influx’ of Demonic Power feels off. It shouldn’t, but it can happen. Any of the like?’’

‘’No.’’ I shook my head.

‘’Good, good.’’ The woman nodded, happy, before approaching and creating a palm-sized magic circle in her hand.

‘’Now, I need you to please roll up your shirt to your upper torso. As you may know, devil pregnancies are not as long as human ones. And, while I’m not a Yuokai expert, it would be good to check the baby just in case.’’ The woman looked me in the eyes, showing her hand openly, letting me feel the magic on it. ‘’Is that okay with you?’’

I squirmed slightly, but nodded, nervous.

I gasped slightly at the feeling of the cool, almost wet feeling of her hand. The magic circle brightened up, and the Doctor nodded. But then, it shone up once more, much to the Doctor’s shock, and then one more time before turning off.

And the Doctor’s eyes were as wide as dinner plates.

‘’…Is something wrong?’’ I bit my lip, hoping that there was nothing happening to my kitten. I asked again. ‘’Doctor…?’’

‘’Nothing wrong, no, sorry about that!’’ The woman suddenly snapped out of it, and her face changed from shock to a big, happy smile. She removed her hand, letting me lower my clothing back down. ‘’Everything is coming along fine with your baby— No, your babies, Miss Toujou.’’

I blinked. ‘’Kittens…? As in…’’ As in more than one? That's what I wanted to ask.

‘’Indeed! And not twins, but triplets. Even for a Reincarnated Devil, this level of fertility is practically unprecedented…’’ I dozed off most of the Doctor’s next words, as the realization hit my head like a lamp post.

‘Three kittens… I was going to have three kittens.’ I thought, feeling a warm feeling deep in my chest.

All of a sudden, the door opened up, slamming against the wall. From there came a wide-eyed, panicking Zatren Fumigami.

‘’Sorry, I’m late. I’m the father of the little potato growing inside this lovely girl…’’ He took a deep breath, answering the Doctor’s silent question and stare with an impish smile before stepping closer to me. ‘’So… is everything okay with the lil’ one?’’

I took one glance at the Doctor, practically begging with my eyes. And, once her gaze landed on mine, the amusement showed clearly by the upturn of her lips.

‘Fun lady.’ I hid my smile, offering a deadpan as I turned to Senapi, poking him on the side and flattening my ears against my head. That always got him. ‘’Senpai… There isn’t a potato…’’

The man blinked, took one look at me, and immediately assumed the worst, considering his shocked, fearful eyes. However, I didn’t let him mind come to any conclusions before I grabbed one of his hands and put it above my stomach.

‘’There are three potatoes,’’ I said, in fake shock, as if I was disclosing some government secret.

Zatren stared. At me, then at my stomach. Then he did it again, so and so around five times. The Doctor almost couldn’t hold her laugh in.

Then, he kneeled to the ground, placing his ear against my stomach. Amused, I put a hand on top of his wild head of black hair. ‘’Senpai…?’’ I tried to hold the act in, but his face was hilarious.

‘’My lil’ potatoes…’’ He whispered, catching up to my joke as he offered his own amused grin.

I huffed, amused, watching as my tails enveloped the man’s arms. They acted on their own accord. I swear.

That’s when the woman in scrubs decided to intervene, offering a small, amused smile as she proceeded to drop the biggest bombshell known to man.

‘’They are nice and healthy, yes. If everything goes well, then you should be noticing a small bump in a week or two. And your later stages of pregnancy…’’ She hummed for a moment, checking her grid. ‘’Well, it will probably be a few months? Two or three.’’

I blinked.

Zatren blinked.

The Doctor smiled impishly. ‘’I told you Devil pregnancies happened at different times, but it’s still a bit too fast. Probably related to your Youkai nature~’’

The triplets were going to be born in a few months.

‘’So…’’ Zatren stared me in the eye with a shocked yet amused glint. ‘’…Built like that. Am I right?’’

‘’Shut up. No-pull-out-game-Senpai.’’

‘’That’s way too long!’’ He whined.

‘’Bleh~’’ I stuck out my tongue.

-X-x-X-

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Fun fact, in canon, Kiba actually went toe to toe with Excalibur Freed... until the latter learned how to use the 'holy' aspect of the sword.

Sadly, it seems this Freed knows about that already (Though, in canon, it took a character basically saying 'lock the fuck in bro' to do it)

Also, yey! The three potatoes are revealed, and Zuzu gets one more child! (Bro thinks he Poseidon or sum)

There are 10 more chapters of this fic on my if you wish to support me and read ahead.

Discord Link: .gg/92Yt5wxeWN