Session 36 – The Elder
Elder Haskar looked up from the book in his hands as Roberto dragged a tiny hysterical devil woman into his study. My hands were tied behind my back and I was sobbing around the gag in my mouth as I knelt beside the guard. The gray haired man shifted in his silk night robe and raised an inquisitive eyebrow.
"My Lord. This woman approached us outside the east wall. She made claims of a vicious animal in the woods and of an appointment to see you. Gorgeo went to investigate the animal report. When I offered to escort her to you, she became shifty and attempted to flee."
The Elder closed his book and rose to his feet. His fur slippers padded across the rich wooden floor until he stopped in front of me.
"Well, I've never met this woman before in my life. I'm quite sure I would remember such a beautiful face." His bony finger hooked under my chin and lifted until I was looking up at him. "So tell me, girl, who are you? Assassin? You don't seem very effective, as I yet draw breath. Whore? You can't be very wise to arrive unannounced, although that outfit does admittedly do you favor. Thief? You're clearly not very skilled." I couldn't focus on him or even mumble around the gag. Everything was panic and adrenaline and terror. My entire body was shaking. The Elder frowned. "What did you do to her?"
The guard straightened and returned the frown. "Nothing, sir! I grabbed her wrist and she became immediately hysterical. She's been crying the entire time."
The Elder rolled his eyes to the sky with a heavy sigh. "Gods Above, give me the patience to deal with women. Well, untie her then. We're not going to learn anything this way."
The guard unsheathed his sword and untied my hands. He tapped the flat of the blade against my shoulder. "No sudden movements, please. I don't enjoy killing women."
My nostrils flared, my tears slowed, and my shoulders heaved as I could finally breathe. My mind raced with disparate lies as the guard reached for the gag in my mouth. The Elder held up a finger indicating pause. "A word of caution, woman. No nasty little spells as your kind is so inclined, if you please." He shifted his robe, showing me an amulet dangling from his neck. I didn't know the enchantment, but it looked expensive. Anti-magic would make the most sense, but that would be very expensive, depending on the maximum tier of magic it was designed to ward against. He needn't have worried, and my heart clenched at the memory of calling for my magic and receiving no answer. That was my first time trying it since.. since Lothe violated me. "It will not affect me, and you will die." The guard finished removing the gag from my mouth and I experimentally worked my jaw.
I wrestled with the panic of being completely defenseless and gently rubbed my sore wrists. "Kind and benevolent Elder." Always flatter the man with the big gun/spear/sword/tank/clipboard/whatever. "My name is Alexis. I lost my way in the woods and became frightened by wild howls. I stumbled upon your magnificent home. Your man informed me of who's residence I beheld. I explained that, while I would be honored to make your acquaintance under better circumstances, the hour was already late, and I did not wish to impose upon your hospitality." I lied my ass off and held my breath that twenty charisma would carry the day.
The Elder appeared conflicted as he looked from me to his guard. "Roberto has been with me many years, and his account does not quite seem to line up with yours." He stroked his chin thoughtfully. "Roberto, could you have misunderstood her intent?"
The guard shifted uncomfortably and stood even more stiffly at attention. "It is.. possible, my Lord. I am not.. overly familiar with the customs and body language of infernal women."
"Nor I." He gave an exaggerated shrug of his shoulders. "Well, we have been rude hosts for long enough, and we have a lovely guest in need of entertaining." He picked up and rang a little silver bell.
A few moments later, a door opened and a human woman in maid clothes entered and bowed her head. "M'lord?"
"Dela, please see that a guest room is prepared and have Qui prepare a snack.." He hesitated and turned back to me. "My Lady, do you eat pastries or.. something more exotic? Human hearts, perhaps?"
I couldn't stop myself from physically gagging. The Elder smiled at my poor attempt to cover it with a cough. "I do eat pastries, my Lord, perhaps too many at times."
He chuckled at that, but raised a disbelieving eyebrow. "I'd not know it to look at you." He indicated the sitting chairs by the cracking fireplace.
I followed the Elder over and tried to maintain my composure as I sank into the entirely too comfortable chair. La-z-boy could learn a things or two from the craftsmen servicing fantasy nobility.
I wouldn't even waste my breath trying to beg off the guest room. He seemed to trust me at this point; I just hoped Paz and the girls were taking advantage of my world-class distraction. Wait.. am I just fantasy Dr. Maxwell? Shit! Well, in that case, when my distraction inevitably goes tits up, then I know what to do: set something on fire and leg it out a window.
We made pleasant conversation for several minutes until Dela returned, placing two steaming cups along with a plate of lemon squares and cookies on the coffee table beside our chairs.
"Thank you!" I smiled up at her from my extremely comfortable chair. She blushed and curtsied before taking her leave. I took a sip of the dark liquid and hummed. "Oh! Milk, sugar, and cocoa. A very pleasant surprise."
His eyebrows rose in surprise. "Yes, it is a guilty pleasure of mine. You have a very refined palette to pick that out so fast."
I blushed and inclined my head. "I am quite skilled with pot and skillet and knife, if I may be so bold. I was recently on the road with some friends. They had very limited supplies, but I always say that necessity is the mother of invention. So I sliced the dried venison and potatoes as thin as I could and seared them in the hottest pan I could manage. Then, I mashed up some blackberries for a compote and.." I blushed at getting carried away. "Apologies. I do carry on."
The Elder gasped with exaggerated scandal and waved away my humility. "And she's a master craftsman of the culinary arts as well! Roberto, your offenses continue to mount!" He emptied his cup and chucked it at the guard's head.
Roberto dutifully let the cup bounce off his head. "Apologies, my Lord. I shall strive to be more clairvoyant when strange women show up in the middle of the night."
"See that you do." The Elder picked up a cookie and took a bite.
I nibbled on a lemon square and hummed happily. "My compliments to Qui. She has a deft eye for pastry." I yawned and stretched my arms over my head. "Apologies, my Lord. I fear the days events chase me to exhaustion."
He brushed aside my apology with a wave of his hand. "Say no more. Roberto, please escort our guest to her room. Have a good night, my dear."
I stood and curtsied before following Roberto farther into the house. He lead me into a very well decorated and luxurious room with a large four-poster bed. I curtsied to Roberto. "Thank you, sir. Please, have a good night."
"You as well, my Lady." He gestured to the silver bell sitting on the table beside the door. "Please ring the bell if you need anything. Wandering the halls unaccompanied would be.. unwise." He inclined his head and left the room.
I kicked off my boots and squished my toes through the soft carpet before flopping back on the super soft bed. Dang, I really needed a bed like this.