Knot The One They Want

Arabella Pov

I huff, staring at the ceiling where tiny glow‑in‑the‑dark stars scatter across the plaster, shining faintly like constellations in the night. "I should be with her," I mutter, the words heavy and pressing against my chest.

"I’m pretty sure your sister‑in‑law told you to give her space," Vanya replies, tugging the blanket closer to her chin. Her voice is calm, but I can hear the weariness underneath. She’s also worried about Lorali’s condition. We’re sharing this bed because space is scarce when they are three different packs crammed into one humble cabin. For the past week, I stayed in Lorali’s room, watching over her while Vanya was in mine with one of her packmates, but now Ophelia has ordered me to step back because Lorali needs space to process what’s happening. So here I am, back in my own room, sharing with Vanya for the night. I have no idea where the president of this country went and I don’t even want to think about what might have happened on this mattress before tonight, while they were together.

"Yeah, but I’m still worried," I say, my voice cracking. "You didn’t see her this morning, Vani. She was genuinely upset that she lived. She wanted to die." Saying it aloud hurts more than I expected.

Vanya shifts, propping herself up on one elbow. Her eyes soften, though her tone remains steady. "I know. I heard the shouting. But Arabella... you can’t fix her by hovering. Sometimes space is the only medicine."

I shake my head, clutching the blanket like it’s the only thing keeping me tethered. "Space won’t heal her. She’s drowning, and we’re just standing on the shore watching."

Vanya sighs, then sits up fully, her hair falling over her shoulders. "Alright. Let’s talk about it. If you’re this worried, then let’s make a plan. What can we do to help her?"

Her words spark something inside me, a fragile hope. I sit up too, pulling my knees to my chest. "We could... start small. Make sure she eats. She has been out for a week, I’m sure her body needs food."

Vanya nods. "Meals, yes. And maybe walk with lots of fresh air, even if she resists."

I add quickly, "Shopping, she loved watching it in movies back at Alma"

Vanya’s eyes brighten. "Yeah, she was always in a better mood after watching the actors buying something."

I bite my lip, thinking. "Music. She used to hum when she cooked. Maybe if we play something soft and familiar, it could remind her of the better days before Spade"

Vanya smiles faintly. "And stories. You’re good at telling stories, Arabella. You could read to her at night to keep her mind from spiraling."

We go on and on talking about ways to make Lorali forget the past to some extent so she can heal, because if she herself wants to die, there is nothing we can do to help her because even if we break her bond by killing her pack; it would all be meaningless.

By the time we finish, the list feels like a lifeline. Vanya reaches over, squeezing my hand. "We’ll do all of this. All of us, Together. I promise." I nod, tears pricking my eyes. "Promise me you won’t give up on her."

"I promise," she whispers.

Time drifts. The cabin grows quiet, the night pressing in. Vanya eventually lies back down, her breathing slowing, her eyelids fluttering shut. Soon she’s asleep, her hand still resting loosely against mine.

I want to sleep but I can’t sleep. My mind races, replaying Lorali’s broken voice snd her hollow eyes. I stare at the ceiling, at those faint stars, and wonder if she’s staring at her own ceiling right now, sleeping or if she’s crying into her pillow.

I whisper to myself, "Just one check. Just to see if she’s alright."

Carefully, I slip out from under the blanket, moving slowly so I don’t wake Vanya. My bare feet touch the cold wooden floor as I tiptoe to the door. The hallway is dim, moonlight spilling through the windows, painting silver streaks across the walls.

I walk quietly, each step echoing louder in my chest than in the corridor. At the end of the hall, I stop before the guest room which is now known as Lorali’s room. My hand hovers over the doorknob. Should I go in? Ophelia said to give her space. But what if she’s hurting herself right now?

My heart pounds. I grip the knob, hesitating. Then I turn it. The door creaks open, and the sight steals the breath from my lungs.

Lorali is standing on the railing of one of the big arched windows, her nightdress whipping in the wind, hair flying wildly as the curtains thrash around her. Moonlight pours in, bathing her in silver, outlining the whip lashes across her back. She looks ethereal, terrifying and like a ghost caught between worlds.

Her eyes meet mine looking dead, hollow and stripped of all light. "Don’t save me," she whispers, her voice carried by the wind. "Don’t you dare."

"Lorali..." My voice trembles, my body frozen. She tilts her head, a faint, broken smile tugging at her lips. "This is the only choice I get to make, don’t take it from me. Don’t take it from me."

Before I can move, before I can scream, she jumps. "NO!" The word rips from my throat as I lunge forward, too late.

A sickening thud follows, and my blood runs cold. I rush to the window, my hands gripping the frame so tightly my knuckles ache. "Lorali!" I scream, my voice breaking.

Below, she lies sprawled across a thorned rose bush, her body pierced in a dozen places. Blood glistens in the moonlight, staining the leaves crimson. The sight makes me choke, my stomach twisting violently.

"Lorali!" I scream again, louder, desperate, my voice echoing through the night.

Suddenly, warm hands envelop me from behind, steadying me as I tremble. I turn my head slightly, dazed, and see Kaziar’s face close to mine, his expression grim but steady.

I’m mumbling, my words spilling out in a trance. "She jumped... she wanted to die... I couldn’t stop her..."

Kaziar’s grip tightens, grounding me. "We’ll get her. We’ll save her. She fell into the rose bush, she won’t die."

Even with his words my eyes remain locked on Lorali’s broken body below, blood pooling, thorns piercing her fragile frame. My heart feels like it’s shattering, piece by piece, as the night swallows my scream.