Mushoku Tensei: Moving Forward

One does not wake up from madness. One is forced awake from it. You are forced awake with clarity, and forced to look at yourself, and your reality, for what remains is you.

It’s been a week since my recovery, and boy am I happy to get off of that bed. Knowing it's good for you doesn’t help. Going from someone that was active almost all day to a week long couch potato, is mind numbingly boring like you wouldn’t believe.

Then there's also the fact that Lilia would come from time to time, and make it increasingly difficult to look her in the eye.

Once the facade of fiction got removed from my eyes, and I was forced to look at Lilia as a person, like really look at her, certain thoughts I wouldn't dare think about, started appearing in my head. It was awkward.

I couldn’t help it.

Although I thought I was looking at her as a person, I’ve been unconsciously looking at her as a 2d(3d?)waifu, and all my looks and actions have been through that facade. Now though, with my facade teared, and my world asunder, I am interacting with her as the beautiful maroon haired woman she is. A very, real, beautiful maroon haired woman.

It actually helped that Zenith entered mother hen mode. If it wasn’t for her doting, the room might have been filled with uncomfortable silences.

Still though… that stew was a little ‘too,’ nutritional.

Now I am free. Free to explore. Free to roam. Free to get the fuck out of here.

Now if only I was allowed to do some magic.

“How about that one?”

“Dog.”

“And that one?”

“Cow,” I answered.

We’ve been cloud watching for an hour now. That leaves 4 more hours to go.

On top of placing a magic ban on me, I also have a training ban. So no swordsmanship.

Can’t even sneak out since everyone has their eyes on me.

Not that I would. I learned my lesson. Buuut yeah, no magic plus no swordsmanship means I suddenly have several hours worth of free time to go through. We already went through our standard lessons, geography/mathematics. The rest is just, well… this.

Make of that what you will.

“Your turn, how about that one?” She asked.

It looks like a kitten.

“Roxy.”

“Liar,” Roxy replies. “This was a stupid Idea,” she mutters.

“This was your idea.”

“Yeah, well… shut up…” she vented. “What the hell did people do before magic?”

“Work?”

Probably fuck like rabbits. Those who can’t do; DO!

…I’ll see myself out…

We tried wasting time away by doing some chores around the village. That only saved us an hour, hence the cloud watching. Now we are…

Bored out of our god-damned mind.

So yeah, this is my life now, at least for the next two weeks.

Lucky me…

Two weeks of forced vacation.

It’s painful.

Beautiful peaceful scenery, with nothing to do. Have you ever had to wait five minutes in absolute silence? Now try doing that a thousand times.

In any case, it really is a beautiful though. The grass, the wind, everything here is so relaxing. I might be bored, but… it’s a good kind of bored. The cool ground below me, the gentle touch of the sun, even the flowers… the scent carries. I swear I can smell mother’s garden from here.

Life is… serene. I am at peace.

Roxy taught me a valuable lesson that day. That is the importance of slowing down, and stopping to smell the roses… lilies, if you will, and rest. It’s therapeutic.

If it wasn’t for her, I’d end up in an early grave.

I would have recovered from my little anemic incident, learned nothing, and kept going at it. Fighting for the world until my body couldn’t fight no more. A dangerous mindset to have, especially when you're four. I would have trained myself like Goku, and died for it.

Now that I think about it…

Goku might have been powerful, but he was also... well… an alien. One of his arcs was even about exposing his alien mindset, and showing how alien he could actually be. Focusing solely on fighting, and love of his family second, he probably doesn’t love in the same way a human does, not to say he's heartless, but not to say he's compassionate. A fight first, family later, type of mind, he was truly an alien in every sense.

I almost lost my humanity.

Thank you sensei. I owe you one.

That said...

“Hey, Sensei… out of curiosity what did you do when you were growing up?”

I might as well break these awkward silences.

I wonder what kind of person she is.

Being more of an Eris fanboy, I don’t really remember much about her backstory.

“Hagwa?! What d-does it matter w-what I did when I grew up?! What are you planning?"

"Why am I planning something?!"

"Because you are. You always do something before you go 'explore.'"

"I didn't plan! I just... went with the flow."

"...are you a typhoon?"

"Just play with me sensei..."

She stares.

"I mean that peacefully."

"Sure," she rolled her eyes. "Just go out and have fun with some of the village kids.”

“I’d rather hang out with you!” I said much to Roxy's chagrin, hiding her face into her hat as I said so.

Seriously, have you met children? They're annoying! During one of my walks when I was coming back from training, back before Roxy came, I decided to give it a go.

…it was not worth it.

I was thoroughly annoyed.

All they did was throw rocks far away in some bizarre pitching contest, play tag, and play-fight against the demon(me).

Needless to say, I’m a little ahead of the curve when it came to athletics. They didn’t stand a chance. Overall it wasn’t a fun experience. Doesn’t help that there was a sore loser among their group, Ava or Vega-something. Vegeta?

Whatever nameless npc begone!

“Actually… Sensei, seriously, what did you do when you were bored as a kid? Sensei’s a demon right, so she grew up in the demon continent, what was that like?”

“I don’t think that it’s that interesting…”

“Do you want to stare at the clouds some more?” mostly rhetorical, of course you don’t.

Please say you don't.

“There's not much to tell…” she then went off, on a tangent about her hometown and the area around it. It was rather dull. Rather than someone talking about their home, it felt more like she was giving a geography lesson.

Her homeland is basically a desert, with very few plants growing around them, and they relied mostly on trade, and magic to get by, you wouldn't find it on any map.

Yes, yes very interesting, but I wasn’t looking for a geography lesson.

“Sensei, what about your friends?”

She flinched at that.

Oh. I see.

You’re one of those whose best friend is their shadow weren’t you?

Well, not like I’m one to talk.

Jokes at her expense aside, I am genuinely curious about her background. Years of living in this world has made me lose a thing or two about the cha-PEOPLE, in my life.

Yeah… people…

I’ve gotta get used to the habit of saying that. Don't want to spiral back into… well, whatever I was spiraling down into.

Anyways, I feel like I should take my time to learn a little about the person teaching me in this world. After all, I have all the time in the world now. Might as well put it to good use.

But yeah, in all seriousness, I know next to nothing about her except for her having a loli mother and a shota father. Also she's a bit of a closet pervert(hallway pervert?), and… talented in water magic. The most I remember about her species is that they age normally until puberty, when their age stills or slows to a standstill, giving their species an appearance of young kids to young teen, I'd say the former.

If I remember correctly… their ‘elder,’ looked like a teen between 16 and 18. Meaning once they start puberty if they age, mathematically, it is one year for every twenty.

Heh~ Those mathematic lessons came in handy.

“...friends…” she pauses, breaking me out of my musings.

“Was sensei a problem child?”

“I don’t want to hear that from you!” She frowns. “But NO. I wasn’t. I did have my own problems, but it wasn't something like-no, maybe it was... hahh," she sighs. "I’m from the Migurd race, we have a few similarities amongst our people, like the color of our hair, or the fact that we don’t age past our teens, as well as the common characteristics among all demon race like long lifespans, and high mana reserves. As for the thing that makes the Migurd special though, that would undoubtably be our telepathy.”

“Ooooh,” that’s right. I almost forgot about that, the Migurd race are known for their telepathy, that’s why-

Oops…

“...an ability I don’t have,” she confesses.

That’s right. That’s why she ran away from home in the first place.

Well, damn. Foot straight to mouth.

“Sensei had her own troubles, huh.”

She nods in confirmation.

“Wanna talk about it?” A ladies man I am not, but I can still listen.

Maybe I should ask Paul advice on how to talk to girls?

Or not. Let's go with not.

“Do you really wanna hear my life story?”

It’s supposed to be a negative question, but yeah I do.

“Why not? We have all the time in the world? Um, unless I’m being too insensitive… we can talk about something else, like… had any students before me?”

“...”

“It was quiet…” she finally starts opening up to me, talking about her daily life, in the village, in the middle of nowhere. It was like a dam was released. Roxy is for the most part quiet, keeping her sentences short, but…

“...then there was this one time, when a bunch of kids just laughed among themselves, and threw me pitying looks, like I care! If you’re going to laugh at me, say something!”

It'd be hard to believe it if you were to see her right now though.

“The girls were playing with their dolls their moms made, and when I asked to play, they just looked at each other, and one of them actually snickered, before saying I wouldn’t fit in. Who would want to fit in with you anyway?!”

Honestly, she was just venting.

“Did they think I didn’t understand them? I’m not blind… morons!”

Conclusion; she had a hard time in her village where everyone talks with telepathy whenever she was involved. She always felt like people were silently judging her, some probably were, the other half was probably her imagination.

Combine that with pitying looks, it left for a very uncomfortable environment. It didn’t help that for any adult that would talk to her in words, there were two adults that would give her a, 'poor thing,' look.

“...still, I wonder how my parents are doing?”

But in the end she does still miss them.

Taciturn, but not heartless.

As enlightening as that talk was, the mood is getting sour, which was the opposite of my intention. How do I get back on track?

“So sensei didn’t have any fun times back home?”

“I ran away from home pretty early in life, whatever fun I had in the demon continent wasn’t ‘home,’ but rather when I was adventuring, then I became a student soon after.”

“So sensei's been studying all her life… so studious.”

“Magic is fun…”

True.

“But we’re not allowed to use magic right now…”

“...when I was adventuring Bradykant gave me rides on her horse before we parted ways.”

Horseback riding, hmm… too bad I don’t know how to do that. Is that even safe for a child to do?

As I was thinking that a wind came by, and flew a leaf onto my face.

Hmm… That's a thought.

“Sensei, wanna try out shield surfing?”

???

///

“Jeronimo!” I screamed as I sled down a hill. Using a barrel lid, I couldn't find a shield, so I dived sliding down a hill.

“Haha, alright your turn.” Shield surfing, got the idea of a Zelda game, never really got down to doing it in this world, because of my own complications.

It’s sad how I almost missed out on a lot of fun activities, because I’m too busy working.

All work and no play make Rudy a dull boy…

Luckily I can correct that now. I don’t have my main sources of entertainment from my old life; manga/anime/novels(kind of do, but not good ones), but shield sledding is something too entertaining to not try.

“J-J-Jeronimooo,” Roxy yells out, and follows suit. She goes down the hill and, “Uwaah!” Loses her balance, and trips. And rolls. And rolls some more…

Talk about a barrel roll.

Under her own momentum she continues to roll down the hill tumbling towards me.

“A for effort, F on the landing. Wanna do it again?”

“...that wasn’t as fun as you’d said it be.”

“Well I did say shield sledding, not shield falling.”

She gives me an annoyed look.

I'm starting to read her looks better.

“Now, now don’t be like that. I still got some more ideas.”

“I hate you.”

“I know you mean love~” I teased.

Deciding to put a little spice on things we added some magic into the mix, hers not mine, I’m still banned from using it after all.

Roxy’s sense of balance is crap, but her use of wind magic, plus with me behind the wheel, it did open up some fun possibilities for the future. Needless to say, it was quite enjoyable.

“Haha. See fun right.”

“Hah… hah…”

“Sensei?”

“Again. We’re doing it again.” She looks at me with a dangerous look in her eye.

“Eh?”

///

I think I just woke up something within her. What followed was a series of shield surfing tricks, where at the end, we were more like a leaf in the wind. Although by the end of it might have just been wind surfing.

Still fun though.

“Roxy, how do you get a girl’s attention?” As we were walking back to our home down the trail I dropped a random question upon Roxy.

“Pff, w-what?! Ahem,” she coughed into her fist. “I don’t know. W-why do you ask?” She stumbled a little before gathering herself.

“Well… I’ve been thinking about girls lately,” not technically a lie. “And there’s one in particular I kind of… like… like a lot, and I wanted her to a… like me, a bit too… sooo… Roxy’s a girl, and…” I let the unspoken question trailed off.

“How observant of you,” she stated flatly.

“Yeah… tips?”

“I really think your father would be best for these kind of talks,” she continued walking down the path, me on her trail. “Why don’t you ask him? Besides, I don’t see you talking to others, who do you like?”

“...I talk to others,” I weakly defend myself.

“No you don't.” She glances at me. “Do I know her?”

“Yes…”

“Is she older than you?”

“Yes…”

“...does she wear a maid outfit?”

“...”

“Don’t look at me like that. It’s obvious you have a crush on her, you follow her like a puppy. It's cute."

“What do you mean it’s obvious?!”

That’s news to me! Until recently I was mostly just playing around, lightly flirting, and complimenting it's not lo-LIKE! It’s not like. Obviously.

“Heeh~ I’ve been thinking this for a while,” she bends down looking at me in the face, before smirking at me.

That’s only cute when Zenith does it!

“But Rudy is quite weak against offensive attacks huh.”

“Huh, what are you talking about?”

Weak to offensive attacks? I take offense to that!

“Well~,” she pulls on one of my cheeks. “Rudy is good at pranking and teasing, but when it comes the other way around…”

Stop that, I’ll bite you, you know.

“Rudy gets all cute and defensive. Hehe, Rudy is all bark, but no bite,” she finally lets go of my cheek.

“HAAA?! What are you talking about? Bite, I’ll show you bite!!”

“Pff. Sure sure, oh, hello miss Lilia?”

“Like hell I’d fall for such an obvious-”

Clack. Clack. Something crashes behind me.

I swiftly turn my head to see the source of the sound, noticing a couple rocks on the ground.

“Ha ha! Yep all cool,” she captures me in a hug from behind, and starts patting me dotingly. “So cute, so cool~ What a cute little lady killer~” she continues patting me while whispering such things.

“Y-you, I’ll-”

“You’ll?”

“...”

I turn my head awkwardly to the side, a blush on my face.

Don’t think you know me. I'll have you know if it weren’t for plot contrivances, like the world ending, I’d totally lewd you loli. Yeah, I totally would. I’m not shy at all! You're shy! Yeah!

“Cute,” she says, still petting me.

Alright, that’s it. You want to play, we’ll play.

I push her away, and point to her. “That’s enough y-you voyageur!”

There, take that.

“...”

“...”

“...we… WE AGREED NEVER TO TALK ABOUT THAT!”

“Agreed? What’s that mean? I must have missed that lesson.”

“But you know what voyageur means!?” she starts blushing. Hard to tell from embarrassment or anger. Probably both.

“Heh~ Does my cute, beautiful sensei have trouble with how I’m addressing her,” I closed the distance once more, hugging her tightly. My courage renewed. “What’s wrong sensei? Is my cute beloved sensei weak to compliments? Does my… ‘bite,’” I emphasize the word to really get under her skin, “bother you? Does sensei not know how melodious her voice is, how beautiful her hair is,” I lean as close as I can to her ear.

Their is a slight height difference.

“Is my sweet sensei weak to this kind of thing? This disciple still doesn’t know how to talk to girls, so there's no way I know these things. He he.”

Her face can only be described as red at this point.

“Roxy’s embarrassed face? How cu-”

Oh, wait, that's a frown.

Death by tsundere.

Somehow those words appear in my mind.

Alright, time to make an escape, almost home anyway.

Turning my head I decide to ‘calmly’ walk away.

Not retreating. Not one bit.

And with an extra pep in my step, I-

“Hugwah-”

-get hooked by a staff, at the neck, and back to her.

“What a rude disciple, you should be punished,” she turns me around, now glaring.

“Sensei, I’m recovering, remember…”

She then continues to place both fists across my temple, and mercilessly rub her knuckles on opposite sides of my skull.

Child abuse!

“I’m sorry,” I find an opportunity, and make a break towards the fence of my house.

“Hehe. It’s my win sensei.” Don’t even know what I’m playing at, at this point, but I’m pretty sure I’m the victor.

“Is that so?” She points her staff, a glow coming beneath her, and a wind spell blasts blooming below my feet, sending me back into her arms. Roxy smirks at me for a moment, before her face changes to something more dreamy.

Her face gets closer towards mine, and then…

Then… she turns my neck forcefully with her wrist and places a chaste kiss on my neck.

“Were you expecting something else, disciple?” She whispered, her voice in my ear, as she stepped away, a devilish look across her face.

"..."

I don’t know what kind of face I’m making, but I can feel the blood flowing to it.

We walk silently to the door.

I feel like I’m losing something. I don’t like it…

“You know, I tease,” I try one last attack, my hand on the handle, “but I don’t lie," I turn to face her.

We’re now at the house’s entrance. Gathering myself I get closer and lean into her ear, and ‘accidentally’, touch it, as I gently whisper into it, “Roxy sensei really is cute~”

I win.

///

“Waaaaah…” I then proceed to yell into my pillow.

…I think I won? What am I doing? Should I have stood around to see her blush?

"..."

Nope! Couldn’t get away with it, seeing as my own face feels super hot right now.

What the hell was all that?! Where the hell was all that machismo in my previous life? I think I just used up all my manly points at the get go! Maybe they stockpiled from my previous life? Ah… I wanna die, wanna die…

Knock. Knock. As I’m getting over my sudden bout of boldness someone arrives.

“Master Rudeus, I’m coming in,” Lilia entered the room.

Ah… I’m not sure how to deal with her right now. I’ve been more or less avoiding her, and have been trying to figure out how to approach her now ever since my feelings for her have been pushed to the forefront, but… I still don’t know what to do.

It’s like I’m going through my first love all over again.

…which I technically am.

“Dinner will be ready in a short while,” she said in her calm tone. “If you have any dirty clothes with you I’ll take them from you right now.”

“Ah… yeah… I’ll just… take these off.” I then proceeded to give her the grass stained clothes on my person, before putting on a fresh set, and preparing to follow her down for dinner.

Screw it… I can do this. I’m on a roll today! If it’s right now, I can do it. Here I go.

“Lilia!”

Why did I yell?!

“Yes?”

“I likeyou, please gooutwithme?!”

“...”

Wha-WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!

Lilia stands before me, calm as ever, looking at me, her face giving nothing away.

Where’d all the planning go? Where all my machismo go? Did I really use up all my manly points?! Ah… I wanna die…

///

THUMP.

Outside the house, a loli was repeatedly bashing her head against the wall.

THUMP. THUMP. THUMP...

“Roxy?! What are you doing?!” Zenith questioned when she found the source of the drumming in her garden.

“I DON’T KNOW?!”