World’s Cutest Alchemist

“Oh, my little baby, have you gotten thinner?” Mama said gently, stroking my hair.

“No! Mama! I think there’s something else very different!!” I exclaimed.

Mama took a step back and looked at me from head to toe.

“Hm…I’m not seeing it?”

“What!?”

“Oh! I got it!” Mama smacked her fit against her palm, “Your ears are no longer pierced!”

“No! Well, I mean, that’s true but! That’s not it!”

“Ugh, this is hard…” Mama groaned, “Give me a few more guesses! But first, let us in, are you just going to keep your Mama and Papa out here like an abandoned puppy?”

I stepped out of the way and my parents entered. Papa shut the door behind him.

Once inside, Mama embraced me tightly,

“It’s been way too long! How could you suddenly go to France without telling me! Do you know how hurt Mama was?”

“Oh, um…Sorry…” I meekly apologized, “But, actually I didn’t go to France…” I mumbled.

“What!?” Mama gasped, “So, you’ve been here this whole time and was just lying to Mama!? Oh, dear, my heart aches!”

“No! Um! Uh…” I didn’t know what to say, the words wouldn’t come out. “Sorry…” Eventually, I just settled with an apology.

“Hehe, Mama forgives you, my baby.” She patted my head before turning to Papa, “Hey! Stop being so taciturn!”

“I’m not being taciturn,” Papa replied, “You’re just hogging the attention.”

“Hogging? I’m not hogging anything. The attention is just naturally drawn to me.”

“That’ll happen when you’re loud.”

“What was that!?”

After their small bicker, Papa approached me and embraced me,

“It’s been a while. Good to see you again.”

“Mm…Good to see you too…” I mumbled.

“Are you eating well?”

“Mm…” I nodded.

“Good.” Papa stepped back and Mama was right back in my face.

“Hm…I’m really not seeing a difference.” She said, stroking her chin.

“…” I stared at her for a moment.

“My baby will always be my baby; There’s no need to avoid me like the plague, you silly buffoon.” Mama chuckled, caressing the top of my head.

I could feel the tears start to well up a little.

Thank goodness…I’m so glad.

“You could even blow up a building and I’d still defend you, you silly goober.” Mama said.

“Hoik!” The one who coughed wasn’t me but Luna who was on the side patting her chest.

Both Mama and Papa turned their attention to Luna who’s cheeks had started to turn red.

“Oh? And who’s this pretty girl?” Mama curiously asked with crescent eyes.

“O-Oh!” Luna flinched, she was completely tense. Unlike her usual aloof demeanor when talking to others, right now you could see her nervousness, “H-Hello,” Luna politely bowed, “Hello, M-Mother-In-Law…My name is Luna Britemill, n-nice to meet you.”

The reason Luna was calling Mama her mother-in-law was, well, because I told her too. I told her that Mama would love it.

Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit.

And I certainly wasn’t lying.

“Oh my goodness!” Mama exclaimed cheerfully, she stepped towards Luna and embraced her, “When did I gain such a cute daughter-in-law! Is this what happens when my baby ghosts me for months?”

“M-Mama…” I started to speak but couldn’t find the words the say. She wasn’t wrong.

“Luna? Is that your name, sweetie?”

“Y-Yes.” Luna meekly replied.

“What a beautiful name; The moon, huh.”

“T-Thank you.”

“Thank you for taking care of…” Mama looked at me before continuing to speak, “Taking care of…” She repeated, dragging out her words.

“S-Stella!” I let out, catching her hint.

She turned back to Luna but then turned straight back to me,

“Ah! Perfect! Yes!” Mama suddenly exclaimed, “That’s what I wanted to name you originally! If only some dimwit-” She looked at Papa, “didn’t get to choose the name.”

“…How am I the dimwit?” Papa asked but received no response.

Mama turned back to Luna and continued speaking,

“Thank you for taking care of my beautiful Stella, Luna. I bet she can be a real piece of work.”

“Hey!” I shouted from the side, “I’m the one who takes care of her!”

Though, my words seem to fall to deaf ears. In an instant I was moping next to Papa.

“N-No, not at all.” Luna hurriedly replied, “Stella is the one taking care of me most of the time…”

“You don’t have to cover for that goober.” Mama chuckled. She turned back to me, “Let’s go sit.” She said.

“Mm…” I nodded

…

Luna and I sat on one side of the table while Mama and Papa sat on the other.

Hidden beneath the table, Luna and I held hands. It wasn’t because I was nervous or anything, I just wanted to hold her hand.

“So, you awakened?” Mama directly asked.

“Mm…” I nodded.

Mana glanced at the cauldron before looking at me,

“I assume as an alchemist? My beautiful daughter-in-law doesn’t look to be a production class.”

When she said the words ‘daughter-in-law’ I felt Luna’s grip tighten and saw her cheeks flush.

“Eh…? Mama, how do you know she’s awakened?” I asked.

“With my eyes?” She stated as if it was obvious.

“…She means that she can see the mana flow in her body.” Papa added.

“Pfft, why’d you tell her so quickly?” Mama glared at Papa.

Papa rolled his eyes.

“Oh, thank you, Papa.” He nodded and I continued, “That’s right, I’m an alchemist.” I said.

Mama tapped the table with her finger a few times.

“You wouldn’t happen to like explosives, would you?”

Luna and I both flinched simultaneously.

How the heck did she know?! Is she a Little Bomber fan or something!?

“H-How did you know…?” I asked.

“Hah!” Mama jumped up, “I knew it!” She turned to Papa, “I told you she felt familiar, didn’t I!?”

“You did.” Papa nodded, “Now I see where she got her bad habits.”

“Bad habits!?” Mama shouted, “You love these bad habits though, don’t you?”

“…”

“Mama, what are you two talking about?” I cut in. This is a no-flirt zone for parents!

“Little Bomber. Raccoon. That’s you, right?” Mama asked, but it was more for confirmation rather than as a question.

“Yes.” I nodded.

“Marcel and I, the very first time we saw you on TV, felt an odd connection with you. We couldn’t explain it, but it felt like we had knew who you were.”

“What?” I let out, baffled, “How in the heck could that be possible? I’m completely silhouetted in any video of me.”

“Don’t underestimate a parent’s intuition.” Mama slyly smiled, “So, have you had any trouble since you awakened? I saw that you made the news recently.”

“Um…Well…” I started to speak but was cut off,

“She causes so much trouble!” Luna suddenly cut in, “Have you seen her Tawer posts? Anything she posts is trouble!”

I shot a glare at Luna.

“That was a bit much,” Papa chimed in, “Threatening to blow everything up because of a knock at your door?”

“Right!? And she did that cause she wanted to win a bet against me!”

So that’s why you cut in! I will remember this!!!

“Eh? What’s so wrong about that?” Mama suddenly said, bringing the table to silence, “If they want to harass my baby, they should naturally be prepared to explode.” Mama said casually.

“Right! Right!?” I nodded hurriedly.

“…No, there’s more options than to just blow them up.” Papa sighed.

Luna blinked a few times in silence.

“Besides the light stuff, is there any problem?” Mama asked again.

The ‘light stuff’ she was referring to was any mischief I’ve been up to.

“Yes,” I nodded, “Um, I want to register as an awakened.”

“Hm? You shouldn’t have any problem doing so?”

“Well, um, I need an ID.”

“Oh, do you want to keep Miles and Stella separate?” She asked.

“Mm.” I nodded.

“Okay, simple enough. Anything else?”

“Wait, what? How is that simple enough?” I asked.

“Eh, don’t worry about it, it’s no sweat, I got it handled.”

Papa sighed and face palmed.

“Mm…” I paused, “Ah, right, me and Mouse are buying a house soon.”

“What!?” Mama exclaimed, but after a moment, she glanced around and nodded, “That makes sense. I figure you can’t exactly do a lot of alchemy experiments here without worrying about the building exploding.

You have to be careful when buying a home though, there’s many things you have to look into to beforehand like how the neighbors are.”

“Ah, Grandma already explained this.” I cut in.

“Grandma?”

“The grandma next door, she’s really kind. She gave us a lot of house buying tips when we told her about it.”

“I see,” Mama nodded, “The elderly do usually have a lot of good tips. But, before you purchase anything, I want to see it myself.”

“Okay.”

“So,” Mama smiled, “Little Bomber huh, you’ve made quite a name for yourself.”

“Hehe, well…It’s not bad.” I said dismissively, hiding the bragging in my voice.

“Pfft, if you want to do it, just do it.” Mama said.

“Hmph!” I jumped up immediately, “I’m the bestest! So impressive and talented and one-of-a-kind~ I’m also confirmed the cutest by the association themselves and the greatest(cutest) production class in the tower!”

“Bahahah!” Mama laughed.

Papa had a slightly amused smile on his face.

Luna sighed, hiding her smile,

“What do you mean by ‘confirmed cutest’?” Mama asked. Luna and Papa looked curious too.

“Hehe, well, look at this!” I said, sharing my messages screen with all of them.

[Raccoon: Tell me! Am I cute?]

[Awakener’s Association Official: Um, yes?]

“The official association themselves confirmed it!”

“Bahahaha!” Mama burst out laughing again, “They certainly did confirm it. Good job!”

“…I don’t want to know the leading conversation to this…” Papa mumbled under his breath.

“…Me neither…” Luna agreed with him. Those two seemed to share a bonding moment as they looked at each other.

“So, how many attempts did it take for you to clear the fifth floor?” Mama asked.

“Obviously only one.” I stated.

“Good!” Mama nodded.

Papa and Luna shared another look.

‘Eighty-four’ Luna mouthed and Papa nodded understandingly.

“So, anything else?” Mama asked.

“Um…Not that I can think of?”

“Good, now, let’s talk about the important stuff.” Mama said with a serious tone.

“What is it…?”

“I’ve always been curious, just which one actually feels better? Now that you’ve experienced both, which is it?”

“Huh? I don’t get it?” Luna said.

While she didn’t get it, I certainly did. My face started to flush red and I quickly shook my head,

“Not telling! Not telling!”

“Oh come on! Who else can I ask about this!?”

“Blah! Blah! Blah! Can’t hear you!” I covered my ears.

“Huh?” Luna looked genuinely confused.

“Sweetie,” Mama turned to Luna.

“Ah, yes!?”

“Do you and Stella sleep together?” She asked.

“Huh? Um, yes, we sleep in the same bed.” Luna said.

“No, no, I’m talking asking if you sleep together.” Mama slyly smiled.

Luna froze as her face turned several different shades of red in an instant.

“Bahahaha!” Mama started to laugh, “I get it,” She turned to me, “You better treat my daughter-in-law right!”

“Hey! What about me!?”

“Bah, forget about you!”

“What!?”

“So! So! Have you tried toys yet? It’s very different now, you know?”

“Waaah! Mama stop!!!”

While I had my ears covered, Mama kept spewing nonsense, Luna stayed frozen with a red face, and Papa…Well, Papa had pulled out a book from somewhere and began to read it.

Overall, I’m happy and I feel blessed.