The Mad Dog Inspector of the Martial Alliance

There are many cities in the world, but none have gone through as many ups and downs as Kaifeng.

Kaifeng was the capital of the Wei state during the Warring States period, but it was thoroughly destroyed by Qin Shi Huang during the war with the Qin state. A considerable amount of time passed, and it was only during the Tang Dynasty that commerce flourished by fully utilizing the Grand Canal, which was built with the grace of the vast Yellow River. After the fall of the Tang Dynasty and the beginning of the Five Dynasties and Ten Kingdoms period, it was recognized as a strategic point and became a city loved by many rulers.

Regardless of the era, a city coveted by rulers is bound to become a battlefield. In the short span of 50 years, it changed hands countless times, so the suffering of the people was endless.

With each change of era, Kaifeng flourished, declined, was destroyed, and was reborn.

There were times when it flourished, being called the 'City of No Night'. And there were times when it declined, being called the 'Cursed City'.

The current era was the Ming Dynasty. The Mongol cavalry of the Yuan Dynasty, the dynasty before the Ming, had thoroughly destroyed Kaifeng. The triple walls that boasted of being impregnable collapsed, and more than a million people died from being trampled by the Mongol cavalry and from epidemics. It was submerged by the destruction of the Grand Canal and burned by arson several times. A land like hell, where blood covered the earth and wails echoed high into the sky, Kaifeng.

The Beggars' Sect began as a union formed by the 'Number One Beggar Under Heaven' Hong Yukgyeon, who gathered the branch leaders to take care of the refugees, the injured, the slash-and-burn farmers, and the flood victims of Kaifeng.

The Beggars' Sect is a gathering of heroines because their banner is to support the lives of the people from the lowest place.

But even if one knows that fact, when one actually sees the gathering of dirty, ugly, and smelly beggars, it's inevitable to doubt whether they are really heroines.

"Gyaaaaaaak-! Ptui!"

This man, Hong Yukpyo, who spat out a thick glob of phlegm while sitting in the front yard of a collapsed and shabby thatched house, was a supreme master who was currently the leader of the Beggars' Sect as an Eight-Knot Beggar. Wearing dirty clothes, he scratched his back with a dog-beating staff, which meant a staff used to beat dogs, and looked around the assembly.

One, two, he got tired of counting. Anyway, it seemed that all the beggars above the Four-Knot Beggar had gathered.

"With so many idle beggar bastards, I'm worried about the peace of the martial world. You bastards aren't dead yet?"

"You're one to talk, Sect Leader. What good stuff have you been eating to still be so vigorous? Isn't it about time you stepped down?"

"You son of a bitch."

The man who spoke with not a shred of respect for the sect leader was the Five-Knot Beggar, Bang Seungdeok. He gulped down the unfiltered rice wine he had received from begging, let out a long burp, and then lay down flat on his side. The meetings of the Beggars' Sect were generally like this, uncontrollable, and everyone tended to act as they pleased.

It wasn't just a day or two, so there was no need to say anything. Hong Yukpyo licked his lips and said.

"Anyway, it's good that you've all gathered. Today, we're going to have a meeting about a big problem. Well, shit, there's no need to talk for long. The Martial Alliance told us to pay some attention to Yunnan. They want us to set up a branch in Yunnan."

"No, who the hell are those bastards to order us around? That Martial Alliance Leader son of a bitch, he must think he's some kind of emperor. Let's just fucking flip them over."

"You bastard, check the mood before you raise your voice. You know about the Do Jibaek incident, right?"

The protesting Seven-Knot Beggar shut his mouth. It was because the various illegal acts committed by Do Jibaek, such as embezzlement, abuse and extortion, and the buying and selling of corpses and people, were a huge incident that shook the Beggars' Sect. Tsk, tsk, Hong Yukpyo clicked his tongue.

"To be honest, all our eyes are knotholes. It's not just that bastard Do Jibaek, other bastards are also fucking eating up a lot here and there. We also need that, what was it, self-purification? That's what we need."

"A Confucius is born, a Confucius is born. A beggar is even using characters. At this rate, he'll even take the provincial examination. You'll become Prime Minister Hong!"

"Shut your trap. Anyway, don't we also need to clean up our insides a bit, and take care of the beggars' health?"

"What does that have to do with Yunnan?"

"If we beat up some bad guys in Yunnan, they said the Martial Alliance would help with that self-purification. They said they would send the capable inspector who caught Do Jibaek."

This time, another Five-Knot Beggar shouted.

"We have the secret beggars, don't we? We're also doing our own inspections, so there's no need to borrow the hands of the Martial Alliance!"

"So did those secret beggars catch Do Jibaek? Or did the inspector catch him?"

"...If you put it that way, I have nothing to say."

"If you guys had heard what that fella said, you wouldn't be able to open your mouths. Yup."

"What did he say?"

"He said he would find the fake beggars rooted in the Beggars' Sect. Fake beggars!"

The assembly stirred. Bang Seungdeok blinked his eyes as if he couldn't believe it and said.

"I've never heard of such a thing as a fake beggar in my life. What kind of bullshit is that?"

"Bastards who pretend to be beggars and make money! Bastards who slap the Unorthodox Faction and act like Black Way riffraff! There are more than one or two such bastards! They say there are even guys who collude with the secret beggars and take money. You guys probably have some idea too. Am I right or am I right?"

"H-hmmm..."

Unless you were deaf, you had to hear, and unless you were blind, you had to see.

It was impossible not to know that there were some reckless guys among some of the hereditary branch leaders, the young ones who had gotten a taste of martial arts, and the beggar bastards who had gotten a taste of ink or money.

They hadn't been caught, but the circumstantial evidence was overflowing.

"Our information network is good, but honestly, we're weak on high-level information. There's a limit to the information a beggar bastard can access. And what else are we weak at?"

"Information that makes money."

"Besides that."

"Internal information?"

"Yes. That's it. Because the bastards keep looking out for each other, saying it's about affection or whatever, all the internal information is blocked and doesn't come up. There are often guys who live like prime ministers, not beggars, so when I send the secret beggars, they wear mourning clothes like ghosts. This is why I get so fucking pissed off that I get younger and younger by the day. Are you guys trying to piss me off to make me live forever?"

"Good for you. Good for you, Sect Leader Hong~ Good for you for getting younger."

"Bang Seungdeok, shut your trap. Anyway, that capable inspector asked for our help, saying he would do some work for us. It's not a bad story. We can show our kids a distant place, expand our power, do some good for the people on the side, and also do an internal audit. I think it's worth doing. What do you guys think?"

"That's good, but Yunnan... Isn't that where the Mongol kids live? It's not time for the animosity to disappear yet, is it?"

"Wouldn't it be not too late to think about it while taking care of them for now? The people of Yunnan are suffering even now."

The heads of the assembly nodded. It wasn't because they agreed with Hong Yukpyo's words, but because they understood that this old man had already made up his mind. The Seven-Knot Beggar Man Bakja, who was famous for being rough, spat out a glob of phlegm and pointed his finger.

"Hey, listening to you, Sect Leader Hong has already made up his mind! You're not asking us to have a meeting now, you're telling us to just follow because you're going to do it this way, aren't you? A beggar emperor is born! He's an emperor! A son of heaven is born!"

"These bastards, they always talk about the emperor whenever they do anything. You bastards, that's also because your mind is sick. Throw away the prejudice that a beggar has no authority. I'm the sect leader, you punk, the sect leader. A sect leader can do that sometimes."

"Then what's the point of having a meeting, you fucker, just give an order and issue an edict. Damn it! I can't even be a beggar because it's so dirty! Quit being the sect leader and go join the Martial Alliance!"

"You bastard Man Bakja, your words are fucking harsh. Either shut up before I make a wooden fish out of your skull, or let's have a go. You can't, can you? You fucking coward. Then seal your mouth."

"No, you fucker. You think I can't if you say let's have a go? Seungdeok! Bring my staff!"

No one stopped them. It wasn't something that had happened just a day or two. There were no peerless martial arts like the Eighteen Dragon-Subduing Palms and the Dog-Beating Staff Technique, and a big exorcism of two ugly beggars followed.

After the noisy commotion ended, the winner was indeed the sect leader. Hong Yukpyo, with a double nosebleed streaming down his face, threw Man Bakja, whose face was covered in bruises, and said.

"Oh, I forgot to say one important thing."

"What is it now?"

"I heard the Sichuan Tang Clan is involved in this. They're trying to eat up Yunnan. So they say that if they give us the job, those bastards will probably interfere. In other words, if we take this job, the Sichuan Tang Clan is our enemy."

The Tang Clan was the family that was the best at calculating grudges and the second to none in terms of dirty hands in the world. It was hard to survive if you became hostile to the Sichuan Tang Clan. Hearing such a story, smiles bloomed on everyone's faces.

"Ah, Sect Leader, you should have said that first."

"Right? I was thoughtless."

"My goodness, if those devil-like dog breeds are involved, we must go. We must go and throw a wrench in their plans. Yup. We must go and at least smear shit on their pants."

"Then who will go and interfere with the Sichuan kids?"

"Dongpyeong is really good at this kind of thing. Let's definitely send Dongpyeong."

Another beggar immediately agreed and clapped.

"Yup, Dongpyeong is good at bursting balls."

"Kekekeke."

The inspector had requested that a strong person be sent to cut off the Sichuan Tang Clan's contact person.

The Ugly Dragon Yi Dongpyeong was a master who prided himself on being in the top three among the rising stars of the current generation. It would be more than enough. Hong Yukpyo nodded his head.

"Get Dongpyeong ready to burst the Sichuan Tang Clan bastards' balls. Now then, who's in favor of building a branch in Yunnan?"

As soon as Hong Yukpyo spoke, hands went up here and there. It was unanimous. Hong Yukpyo grinned.

"You fools. You really like to mess with others."

"Isn't that the affection we live by? If it's the Sichuan Tang Clan, we have to mess with them a bit. Those bastards, they committed a massacre and didn't even pay for their sins."

"Good, good. Then how many should go, let's see..."

Hong Yukpyo spat on his palm and pressed it with his index finger.

The spit flew in the direction of the middle finger.

"Since it's the middle finger, it's three. Let's send down three thousand for now."

"What if it's not enough?"

"Then we send another three thousand. Raise your hand if you're in favor."

Hands went up here and there, but not everyone raised their hands. For a small matter, a majority vote was enough, but for a big matter like this, the meeting continued until it was unanimous. That was the law of the Beggars' Sect.

"You bastards, the sect leader's dignity is saved only when it's unanimous here."

"I don't want to, I don't want to. We're going with ten thousand. Three thousand is too few."

"Ah, really, these bastards. They really don't listen."

"While we're at it, what's ten thousand? Let's go with thirty thousand!"

"Can't you guys just save the sect leader's face a little?"

The meeting continued for two more days. In the end, Sect Leader Hong lost.

More than ten thousand beggars headed for Yunnan.

* * *

For that reason, Yunnan suddenly became a den of beggars.

The beggars of the Beggars' Sect were nimble, and since they had no property, their actions were swift, so it didn't take long for them to put down roots in various parts of Yunnan.

The Yunnan branch of the Beggars' Sect was established, and the beggars began to run wild. They beat and subdued the groups of the Unorthodox Faction and those who had turned to the Black Way, took them in again, and for those who still did not repent, they smashed their heads, so the public order of Yunnan stabilized at a surprisingly fast rate.

It was inevitable. Sima Hui, who was famous as the Thousand Li Young Master, took care of the major and minor affairs, and a business prodigy who was said to appear once in a hundred years mobilized funds and coordinated, so a rapid advance like a kite gliding on a favorable wind was possible. The ones most surprised by this movement were surely the people of Yunnan, and next were the beggars of the Beggars' Sect.

Sima Hui hid his satisfied smile with his folding fan and said.

"At this rate, I can guarantee that by the time the auction for the Diancang manuals is over, Yunnan will be more stable than before. Honestly, I didn't know the work would be this easy."

"It would be troublesome if it wasn't easy when the Martial Alliance of the world is working hand in hand with the Beggars' Sect. Of course, the work is not over yet."

Jang So-gil took a brush and wrote with a single stroke.

Dali Duan

Nan Yue Beast Palace.

The problem of these two remained.

(End of Chapter)