The Mad Rat’s Lab

Ugh… I’m bored out of my mind.

“...Are we there yet?”

My question, aimed at nobody in particular, receives a quick answer from the person sitting right next to me.

“It’s the fifth time you’ve asked in the past ten minutes. You already know the answer; there are two to three hours of travel remaining.”

“Ugh…” I feel like dying. I’m too bored to survive.

Just look at the scenery! It’s an endless green space! Endless green slopes, interspersed by pure yellow wheat fields, and windmills in the background. Some of the wheat fields have already been harvested, instead featuring the massive hay ‘rolls’, as I like to call them.

Sure, it’s a beautiful scenery. Sure, it’s calming. But that’s only what you think the first time you see it. After more than two hours of the same view, you get bored up to the point where you want to die like me.

I mean… Regardless of how pleasing to the eyes something is, it’s impossible not hate it when it’s the same All. The. Fucking. Time!

“Fufu. You’re acting more childish than usual. What’s the matter? Are you that excited?”

“That’s true, but also not…”

Wait. Did Laura say I’m acting more childish? It’s normal to be excited about the TV program, but I don’t think it’s affecting me too much. Why did she…?

Ah! It must be Marta’s fault. Yep, it’s definitely her fault.

Before leaving on this trip, I consulted her about the details and the contract, and… well, she got a bit too into the ‘consultor’ role. Yeah, let’s leave it at that.

Her persistent checks and explanations reminded me of an overprotective mother worried for her chicks. It even made me feel a bit sick, not sure if I should take it to heart or leave her be.

I mean, I understand she wanted to make sure I didn’t commit a mistake, but… Was there really any need to treat me like a little kid?

The contrast with her usual behavior made it even more jarring…

Oh, by the way. Marta is also the reason Laura and I are currently on this trip. She said that, for an opportunity as important as this one, if there’s even a remote possibility of meeting the people in charge in person, I should do it.

Something-something about obtaining important contacts, taking the first steps into the sector, or whatever. I was too bothered by her attitude towards me to pay proper attention.

Maybe Marta was right in treating me like a kid, after all…

Anyway! What matters is that, due to her advice, Laura and I are now trapped inside this car.

The trip to Mystical & Dangerous Monsters & Dungeons headquarters is long. Veeeery long. So long that I want to try what happens if I shoot a bullet straight through my skull. But since it’s close enough to reach in a single day’s car drive, I couldn’t exactly refuse to go after Marta’s nagging.

I shouldn’t have listened to her, after all.

Laura is the only one from whom I could ‘borrow’ a car from, but the hidden clause I didn’t read when signing the contract was that she would be the driver and come with me. Now, I’m locked with her inside the car for the rest of the day, and we’ll have to sleep in the same room because of the budget.

In case you don’t know, most university students aren’t exactly what you could call ‘loaded’.

So yeah. Laura drives, and I get bored watching the scenery… the usual stuff, really. Well, as usual as a once-in-a-lifetime occurrence can be.

“Oh, and thank you for coming with me.”

If she hadn’t, it would have been impossible for me to go. Not until a long time later, because the university classes have already started. A two-day trip on the weekend only works if you go by car. Public transport would take way too long, and a plane is too expensive.

“For the umpteenth time, you’re welcome. Now, can you stop repeating the same things over and over?”

Her comment hurts. Well, kind of. After all, when you’re bored, the same thoughts keep repeating over and over, so it isn’t like I can choose to think about something else, can I?

“...If you want to pay me back, you can do so when we’re alone in our room… I won’t say no to that, fufufu…”

“...”

I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that. For my own sanity.

Alright. Let’s do us both a favor and change the topic. Didn’t she ask for it herself?

“I’m curious. How did you convince Clara to stay back home? She pestered me for a whole week, but suddenly stopped asking after talking with you...”

Laura smiles mischievously, sending a glance my way before returning her sight to the road.

“Do you really want to know? Fufufu.”

“...No. I’m not that curious.”

Why does her grin send a chill running down my spine? I can’t understand.

Still, I’m glad Laura convinced her. My sister was a bit too persistent, not accepting a no for an answer, even when I told her she would have to pay for her trip and room.

Did Laura convince her by explaining how small the car is? Or maybe she told her that the air conditioning has trouble keeping the car cold? Depending on the zone you are in, the end of summer is the hottest part of the year. I’m sweating buckets right now, even when the AC is working at maximum.

What about Ricard, you ask? He never asked to come.

As soon as he learned that Laura was going to drive me there, he stepped aside, saying he had other stuff to do, while making a similar grin to the one Laura is currently making and poking at me with his elbow.

I thought he would be the one who insisted the most, being obsessed with everything related to DMA. It turns out I was wrong.

Silence takes over once more.

I watch the scenery. The scenery stares back. Ah, no, that’s what the Abyss does, sorry for the confusion.

But boredom overcomes me as quickly as before.

“Can we take a break? I need to go to the bathroom.”

“What are you, an old man with incontinence?” Laura raises one eyebrow. “We stopped no more than half an hour ago…”

Without warning, she suddenly turns her head towards me. Hey, no! Watch the road, not me!

“No. You just want to stop because you’re bored, aren’t you?”

Ah, shit. She got me.

“...You’re right. I need to move. Staying seated for a long time isn’t comfortable.”

She nods, “Neither is it for me. We can stop at the next service area. But are you sure? Won’t we be late at this rate?”

Wait. What time is it…? AAAAAAH! It’s this late already!?

We set off very early in the morning so we could meet with the M&Dx2 team during the afternoon. Then, we sleep and do a bit of tourism the next day. Who in their right mind would waste this opportunity to visit a foreign capital city?

But at this rate, we’ll be late for the meeting. Maybe I should have asked for fewer ‘bathroom breaks’ after all…

“I-it doesn’t matter anymore. I can hold it in for a while longer,” I solemnly declare.

“Hold it in? Are you still going on with the incontine—”

“I misspoke, okay!? And I don’t have incontinence!”

“Fufufu…” Laura makes another one of those demon-like grins, licking her lips.

Geez. What can a man do when the girl sitting next to him keeps provoking him? Should I just allow her to get what she wants?

…That sounds kind of scary, don’t you agree?

“Are you okay?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” I tilt my head. “Why do you ask?”

“Because you’re shaking like a leaf.”

“Am I…?” I look at my hands, and sure enough, they’re shaking.

Did the pressure get to me? I mean, this is a huge opportunity. If everything goes right today, and the program is a success, my dungeon might grow into one of the best and most famous ‘themed’ dungeons in DMA.

Reaching that rank is enough to make you famous. With fame comes prestige, and sometimes even more important things, like money.

I know a bit about it thanks to Marta. With her current position, she gains more money than most adult workers… Not like she has stopped studying, living off of her success, because gaming is ephemeral. Better have something to rely on if things turn south.

To think I could reach a similar level to my sister if this works out…

Laura grabs my hands and looks straight at me. “Calm down, Andreu. There’s no need to worry. Be yourself, and everything will be okay.”

Comforted by her support, my shaking slowly subsides. “You’re right. Thanks.”

She turns around, leaving her trademark ‘fufufu’ laughter behind. She pushes the large door open, and immediately a large mural themed around Mystical & Dangerous Monsters & Dungeons greets our view.

Wow. That’s kind of amazing.

After a short introduction, a staff member drags Laura and me to a private room. There, we meet two people, the ones in charge of selecting dungeon candidates for their next program.

The first is a man who seems to be scared of even his own shadow. When I greet him, he jumps so high that he almost touches the ceiling, and for some reason, he can’t look me in the eyes.

The second is an energetic woman of… around thirty years? I’m not sure about the last detail.

After the greeting and introductions, there’s the usual explanation of what Mystical & Dangerous Monsters & Dungeons exactly is, their philosophies, how they find new talents, etc.

As expected, they contacted me after the tournament because of the popularity increase. Strike while the iron is hot, as they say. Securing their chance now would all but guarantee success, as most viewers would recognize the name and style from the tournament.

What I didn’t know was that they had their eye on my dungeon for a long time. Not sure how much, but at least one or two months.

Anyway. I won't bore you with what comes next; I know how awful it feels after experiencing it myself. You just need to know that there’s a lot of legal talk, conditions, and boons. They explain in detail what our collaboration will entail, how we will work together, what limits and things are forbidden…

In short, everything Marta warned me about. A long, boring, and repetitive talk.

The conversation flows smoothly until the woman extends a paper in my direction.

“Since we seem to be on the same page, I believe it’s time to talk about this,” she says, pointing at the list written on it. “Read it. Those are the changes we ask you to make.”

“...Changes?”

Changes, as in ‘dungeon changes’? Nobody told me about this beforehand. Is this one of those traps Marta warned me about?

I start reading the list. Written here are a series of changes to make my dungeon more appealing. More… beautiful? They’ve gone through The Mad Rat’s Lab more than once, searching for empty spaces or stuff that wouldn’t look good on camera once they turn it into a TV show.

“Usually, we would have waited for you to finish your dungeon on your own and contacted you only after. But we’re pressed for time. If we want to use the tournament’s popularity, we can’t wait until then.” Says the woman.

This is good, because most of those are things I completely missed, didn’t have enough cp to fix them at that moment and forgot to do it later, or simply was too lazy to complete.

These changes will not only work for them, but also improve my dungeon, so I’m glad they prepared the list.

The problem is what comes next.

“...Monster changes. Traps and layouts, too?” After the obvious and purely aesthetic changes, comes a list of changes I’m not too fond of. “The Tunnel’s Nightmare… even The Hunters!? W-what does this mean…?”

“Hmm? Let me see.”

Laura, who has mostly remained silent during the whole exchange, like the scaredy man, moves her chair closer and starts reading the paper too.

No way. The changes written here… Aren’t they too much!? I’ve worked my ass off creating some of these monsters, you know? To come and say I have to rework them from the ground up, isn’t asking for the impossible!?

“Did you find anything weird?” The woman presses on. “Those are basic changes we believe will benefit your dungeon. According to our evaluations, those are the elements that need to be improved so our program…”

My eyes start spinning.

Is this what Marta warned me about? The unreasonable demands of big companies?

“... As you know, our TV show has a large audience, and the viewers want to see a certain kind of stuff. While

I don’t want to change my monsters! They’re my ideas, and no one else’s! I’ve worked hard to design and create them!

But, at the same time… This is a chance that only presents once in a lifetime. If I refuse now, it’s the end.

I didn’t start playing DMA to get famous, nor to make a living off of it. I started playing the game because I wanted to have fun. What came after is just a bonus.

But I know. I know how great it is if you can make a living from something you enjoy doing. It’s something that literally changes your life. I’ve seen it on Marta, and also on my mother, who’s a writer. That’s why it’s so hard to make a decision now.

Ugh… What should I do?

Laura slams the paper on the desk and stands up. She glares at the two M&Dx2 representatives before turning around towards me.

“Andreu.”

“...Yes?”

Placing a hand over mine, she suddenly grabs it and pulls up, lifting me from my seat.

“Let’s leave.”

“?” Leave? What does she mean—

“It’s clear they don’t want your dungeon. They just want to use it as they please.”

The woman tries to defend their group. “Wait, that’s not—”

“Not what? Andreu’s dungeon got to where it is thanks to his crazy inventions. That’s what players appreciate, and the reason they come. If you don’t understand even that, we have no business here.”

“No, that’s not—”

“Or what, did you not find any ‘mad scientist’ dungeon that fit your criteria, so you decided to use one that’s relatively famous and force the owner to change it as you please?”

W-what the hell’s going on!?

Why is Laura acting like that? Why is she agrier tham me? Shouldn’t I be the one offended by their demands? I mean, I am angry, but not to the point of disregarding everything else…

Laura starts to drag me towards the exit.

“P-please! W-w-wait!” For the first time throughout the meeting, the scaredy man raises his voice. “D-don’t leave yet…! W-we also, have, pr-pressure from our, s-s-superiors. T-that wasn’t our in-in-intention...”

After hearing those words, Laura stops. Hidden from the other two, I can see the tips of her lips curling up.

She turns around, still dragging me with her. “Alright, enough excuses. Talk. We’ll leave if we don’t like what we hear.”

What follows is an intense back-and-forth between Laura and the timid guy. With me being too shocked to fully understand what’s going on, and the woman too baffled to intervene, the ones who talk now are those who stayed silent at the start.

I can’t understand. What does Laura have to win with all this? Why is she helping me so much?

Laura likes me. I know that. I’ve known for a while now, but… I always thought it was just a physical attraction. Watching her get so involved in this mess for my sake, it makes me…

I don’t know how to say it.

I’ve seen family members who aren’t willing to put this much effort. To think she, who’s not even related, is ready to work so hard for me…

The way I see Laura slowly changes as the agreement fully takes shape.

By the time I fully recover, I find myself signing the contract, with Laura eagerly watching my every move from the side.

“Y-you won’t regret it. You made the r-r-right decision.”

The scared man says. As a final goodbye, I raise my hand for a handshake. Against all common sense, he suddenly jumps back, hiding behind his comrade.

Hyeaaah! D-don’t come close. Y-y-your, y-your… y-your c-c-cl-cl-cl-cl-clones…!”

Everyone except him makes the same awkward expressions.

My clones…? What? Why did he mention my clones? What’s wrong with this guy’s head?

Anyway. What matters is I’ve got it! My dungeon will soon appear on TV, and not only in any TV show, but in Mystical & Dangerous Monsters & Dungeons! M&Dx2, one of DMA's most famous programs, reputed for how immersive and amazing all the dungeons that appear in it are!

Bursting with excitement, I can’t focus on anything else until we get out of the building.

“Congratulations! You did it, Andreu!”

Laura jumps at me in a hug. I obviously hug her back.

“Yeah… It still feels like a dream. You were so cool there…”

“Fufufu. If I was so cool, how about you reward me?” She looks up to me, our faces very close. Her lascivious smile is a perfect copy of the one she usually makes with her Champion.

Despite her Champion having a better figure, to me, she looks a lot better like this. More… natural.

A reward, she says.

Unaware of my own actions, I lower my head, approaching her. My eyes locked with hers.

We keep getting closer until, inevitably, I kiss her.

This feels… surprisingly good? But… Why? For some reason, I feel like I’ve just committed the gravest mistake of my life.

We part our lips, but before I can catch my breath, Laura jumps at me, with another one of her ‘fufu’ chuckles. She clings to my back with her legs and locks my head in place with her hands

“You have no idea how long I’ve waited for this.”

She steals my lips. Her kiss lasts so long that I feel like I’m going to suffocate. No, really. I can feel my head spin… Aaagh, my lungs are aching!

“Puha…! Aaah, I almost die—”

Before I can finish, Laura steals another kiss. And another. And another. She keeps repeating the same actions endlessly, until I start turning purple. Literally.

She finally parts her lips and falls to the ground. But before I can breathe, she starts pulling me somewhere.

“Andreu. Haah… Andreu, come with me. We have a whole room to ourselves… Fufufu!”

“W-wait. What do you plan to do with me?”

“What, you ask? I’m sure you know by now, fufufu!”

This… This succubus, no, this demon! She’s going to devour me! She’s going to suck everything out until there’s not even my soul left!

Aaaaaagh! Someone save me!

The E—

No! Don’t fuck with me! Anyone! Literally, anyone! Don’t ignore me, my life’s hanging by a thread! Please, save me before this succubus devours my soul—

THE. END.

Nooooooooooooooooooooo!

This is how The Mad Rat’s Lab achieved its rightful place among the most famous DMA dungeons. It would still take a while, but after a few months, Andreu’s dungeon would be consolidated into one of the most iconic and famous in DMA, surpassing even his own sister’s, Anthemia’s, dungeon.