Master of Minds, Master of Me

Felix walks towards his walk-in closet.

‘’I dress myself too, so you two can dress in peace.’’

Milna approaches me and helps me get dressed. She really did have perfect timing. And I do feel more comfortable now, fully clothed.

‘’Should I fetch some healing ointment for you, Lady Lorelia?’’

‘’Healing ointment? Why?’’

She looks a little embarrassed.

‘’Mm… No reason. Is there anything you need before I go?’’

‘’No. Thank you, Milna.’’

She exists, and soon after, Felix comes back looking like the perfect Prince once again. He really is way too charming. No one should look like that.

‘’Why were you so confused earlier?’’

‘’What do you mean?’’

‘’I sensed it from your mind. Did Milna say something off-putting?’’

‘’Oh, it was probably because Milna asked me if I wanted some healing ointment. But I’m perfectly fine, so I didn’t quite understand why she asked that.’’

He smiles at me, looking somehow smug and guilty at the same time.

Crap.

Did he do something to me? Something that Milna saw?

‘’Felix.’’ My voice drops low.

‘’Yes, pretty flower?’’ He says, faking innocence.

‘’What did you do?’’

‘’Me? Nothing. Why would you ever think I did something?’’ He acts dramatically, like I hurt his feelings or something.

I walk in front of the mirror. But I see nothing on my skin. My dress covers my neck, so I open a few buttons and lay my eyes on the hickeys. I turn to glare at Felix.

“Did you really have to? It’s already embarrassing enough without the hickeys.”

“The hickeys?” He looks at me for a while, and then he smiles awkwardly. “Yeah, right, the hickeys. Sorry, my bad. Will happen again.”

There is something unusual about the way he speaks. Something weird in his tone.

“I think you meant to say that will not happen again.”

“No. That would be lying.”

I just stare at him. The audacity of this man is just too much sometimes. But there is something more serious we need to discuss. I go sit on the sofa. And I startle since sitting hurts a little. I guess it's understandable since he was pretty ruthless with his fucking.

“Sit down, Felix. We need to talk.”

“Woah, am I in trouble? You going to spank me?” He winks

“No! Just sit down.”

He walks toward me.

“Not next to me!”

“What? Why not?”

“I need space to think. You are just going to distract me with touching or something.”

“Aww… You know me so well.”

Luckily, he obeys and goes to sit on the couch opposite me.

“Why did you make me your Queen when I specifically told you not to?”

“'Cause I can't live without you.”

“I really can't be your Queen.”

“Why?”

Because I don't want you to kill me. But I can't just tell him that.

“I want to be a priestess, not a Queen.”

“You can be that if you want. I don't care.”

“A Queen can't be a priestess.”

“Well, maybe not right now. But I’m sure I can change that when I’m the King.”

I just stare at him. He really is hopeless. Okay, let’s say something else.

“What about your mana?”

“What about it?”

“My presence clearly makes it act up more. Do you really think it's smart that I’m close to you? Aren't you afraid that someday you can’t control it at all? Master Loneflare said that it didn't settle as it used to.”

He inspects me for a while, maybe thinking what to answer.

“Are you afraid that I will hurt you?”

I nod. I’m pretty sure you can count killing as hurting.

“Did I hurt you today?”

Well, yes, a little. I didn't mind that. Should I mind it? Probably. But apparently, I’m just so twisted that I liked it.

“No. I mean, yes, but that was okay. I didn't mean that kind of hurt. Master Loneflare said that you were going nuts on the battlefield because of it. So doesn't that mean that it affects you in other ways too?”

“It’s true that it boosts my hate and anger on the battlefield. That’s only because it is war. You are bound to have some aggression. But that's not the case here. I would never hurt you like that, Lo.”

“This whole thing with your mana is just new and foreign to me. It’s just scary.”

“I promise it won't affect you. Okay, that was maybe stretching the truth, since it most definitely makes resisting you harder. But that's all. Is there anything I could tell or do to make you more comfortable with it?”

This could be my chance. Perfect.

“Could I talk to Master Loneflare about it?”

He looks rather surprised.

“Theodore? Why?”

“He is the most knowledgeable about magic. And he is the one settling your mana. I just thought he could answer my questions more neutrally than you. Since you are biased.”

He leans back, thinking.

“Sure. I can ask Theodore here. If that makes you feel better.”

“Thanks.”

“Sooo… Can I now sit next to you?”

“No! I’m not finished.”

He throws himself to lie on the sofa, lifting his hand to his forehead dramatically.

“My pretty flower is so cruel. I might die if I can't touch you soon.”

I ignore his dramatic act.

“Are you now going to stop pretending to be other people?”

He turns his head to look at me.

“Do I have to? It’s just way too fun.”

“Yes. Tricking me isn’t fun.”

“But—”

“No! No buts.’’

‘’Give me one good reason for it.’’

"Firstly, it’s just a purely mean thing to do. Secondly, Master Loneflare said that you should not use your illusion magic so much. Thirdly, how can I ever trust you if you just keep playing mind games with me? I’m still pissed off from the whole Father Owen and Max thing.’’

He turns to lie on his side and leans his head against his hand.

‘’Goddammit, you are so hot being defiant like that. I’m so turned on right now.’’

‘’Felix!’’

‘’Yelling my name like that? Even better.”

“Stop being a jerk!”

He really is utterly hopeless. I can't believe this man before me is the future King of our country.

“You stop being so cute first. My heart might burst anytime.”

My brain may burst anytime with this rate. I just let out a heavy sigh. Better change the topic, again.

“So what happens next?”

“Well, you are going to be here for a week. So we can get to know each other better. Your identity will be a secret for that time. Next Friday it’s our engagement party, and only then will it be revealed who got chosen. After that, everything is sealed between us, and you can go back home, while everyone prepares for the wedding. Which will probably happen in a couple of months. While waiting for a wedding, you will receive more education to prepare you for what's about to come, if you want.”

“What do you mean if I want?”

‘’It's normally mandatory. But I’m not going to force you to perform Queen’s duties if you don’t want to. Since you didn't want to be a Queen in the first place, I won't force the duties on you.”

I’m not sure what to think about that. Usually, if the Queen isn’t doing her duties, it means that the Queen has died. Then her duties fall to concubines. My heart freezes.

Is Felix going to take concubines?

The thought is like poison in my head. The disgusting, ill feeling spreads through my whole body.

“Lo? You okay? Is the thought of being a Queen really that hideous?”

I focus on Felix again and see that he is sitting again, looking distraught. I should have known he sensed my discomfort from my mind. But he doesn't know why I feel that way. I should correct him, but I don't want to admit my thoughts either. And it doesn't even matter if he takes concubines or not. I’m going to die anyway.

I furrow my brows, not sure what to say to him.

“Or is the thought of being with me so hideous?” His expression is painful.

“No. It’s not because of you.”

Well, it is. But not in the way he thinks. I don't want him to think I don't like him. Not anymore. I think I have lied to him enough. But his expression still seems depressed. I thought he would lighten up to hear that.

“For the first time, I wish you would be better at lying Lo.”

Crap. I didn't think he would sense that I’m lying.

“It’s not what you think. I promise. I do like you Felix, I really do. I just can't tell you the real reason, I’m sorry.”

In a second, Felix is suddenly sitting next to me with wide eyes. I can't understand his mood swings at all.

“Did you really just say that? Say it again.”

“Say what?” I ask, confused.

“That you like me. Say it again.”

I suddenly feel pretty embarrassed. I didn't even realize that I just confessed my feelings for Felix. I mean, I wanted him to know that I like him, but I just didn’t think about what telling him that actually means.

“Come oooon Lo. Say it again.”

I fiddle with my fingers on my lap.

“I…”

“You?”

I close my eyes like that would make this situation somehow less embarrassing.

“I like you.”

He scoops me in his arms and hugs me so tightly.

“Goddammit, you really make me the happiest man alive. Say it again.”

‘’I’m not going to say it again. Let me go!’’

‘’No chance.’’

I admit my defeat and just press my head to his chest. My heart feels so warm when I’m around him. Why do I really have to like him of all the people? And he is just an oddly dramatic, annoying trickster. He has fooled me and haunted me with his visions. But still, I feel so safe being like this. Next to him, clinging to him.

When he finally withdraws from the hug, he looks at me with his usual bright smile.

‘’So ready for dinner with my father?’’

I choke on my own saliva. Dinner with the King? Hell no! I’m not ready.

‘’What do you mean?’’ Maybe I just heard him wrong.

‘’Oh, did I forget to mention? We will be having dinner with my father like right now.’’

‘’Well, hell yes, you forgot to mention! How could I ever have dinner with the King?’’

‘’Don’t think about him as a King. Think about him as your future father-in-law.’’

‘’I think that might be even worse. You know I’m not good at things like that.’’

‘’Things like what?’’

‘’You know. Socializing. I’m used to being in the background.’’

‘’You don’t give yourself enough credit. I think you are rather skilled at conversing with people. Sure, you might not be the most loud one, but you don’t need to be. And I’m there. So you have nothing to worry about.’’

‘’Do I really have to?’’

‘’My father is rather excited to see who I chose to be the future Queen. And he has been having more energetic day today. So he will even come to the dining room himself.’’

Oh right. I kind of forgot for a moment that the King is ill. But still. It’s so sudden. I’m not mentally prepared.

‘’Please, Lo. I really want you to meet my father.’’

His eyes gleam like a shimmering ocean under the sunlight. Crap. I can’t say no to those eyes. So I nod.

‘’Thanks, Lo. You’re the best. I promise I will repay you.’’

‘’Repay me how exactly?’’

He leans to whisper in my ear. His lips against my skin give me shivers.

‘’You just have to wait and see.’’

It’s quite obvious from his tone that he definitely plans something sexual. He stands up and reaches his hand toward me.

‘’Let’s go. I’m starving.’’

I grab it and let him pull me up from the couch, and he starts leading me toward the dining room. I’m so nervous, so my appetite is nowhere to be seen.

Oh, please God. Help me somehow manage to do this without looking like a complete fool.