Cultivating in Honkai!

Griseo’s painting session was silent most of the time. She occasionally asked him some random questions, to which he answered. Shi Tian remained still. Only his mind worked at this moment. He looked around his surroundings.

‘Her Cave Heaven… it looks like The Deep.’

There were things that could never be placed under Fire MOTH’s control. The existence of these unstable and dangerous Flamechasers pushed them to create a ‘prison’ especially for them. That was how The Deep came into being.

The said Flamechasers locked onto it were Aponia, Kalpas, and Vill-V. Later on, Griseo was sent to it to contain her unstable power. Aponia was the one who took care of her, followed by Kosma. She lived the latter part of her life in the Previous Era inside The Deep.

It was a different sight in the Elysian Realm, but The Deep in the Previous Era consisted of a flower field. A stone pathway led to a replica of the sanatorium where Aponia once lived. From the place the two were currently in, the flower field is Griseo’s favorite spot. Shi Tian sat on a stone boulder that appeared out of nowhere. His jaw is resting on the back of his hand.

‘A Cave Heaven made out of it…’

Every Cave Heaven Shi Tian went in possessed the ‘uniqueness’ of their owners. The Previous Era had been Griseo’s life. She could not, nor would she, let go of it. Though the reason why she asked Shi Tian to be a model remains unknown, he did not stop guessing. Only by understanding her would he be able to give that ‘final push’. It was late, but that was his responsibility as her teacher.

“How… did it feel? To not be affected by THEIR influence?”

Suddenly, a mature question resounded with her childish tone. Shi Tian was startled, yet he still answered calmly.

“It makes me feel strong. Knowing that nothing can shake my mind means I am invincible. It is my capital against THEM.”

As a mortal, he was able to withstand Nihility’s influence. It was a god-like feat. Shi Tian’s existence is an anomaly that should have never existed in this world, but he did. He showed this world his uniqueness, shining brightly like a blinding sun.

Like a Deliverer the universe never wished for.

“Then… Why did you pull yourself down?”

“...”

Griseo’s question was confusing at first glance. Shi Tian understood it well, still.

“Love is a weakness in some cases. However, not forming a connection out of this world is outright impossible. It is in my nature to seek others… so that I can find my purpose in life.”

Shi Tian’s unchanging nature helped him resist a literal Aeon. He was free from any weakness. Such a nigh-impossible state was attained by him.

Yet…

He threw it away.

He formed connections with people of this world. They were friends at first, followed by lovers. Shi Tian created his own weaknesses. He could no longer become the same invincible Shi Tian who braved through Nihility as a mortal.

He has something to lose now.

Though his nature remained unchanged, he punctured it with gaps. It was unknown whether it would affect him drastically. It is a question for the future. All he could do at this moment was speculate. The same went for Griseo.

While ‘painting’ this blinding Sun, she came across these flaws. They are tiny specks of ink that did not match the Sun, sporting imperfection in an otherwise flawless work.

“Have you ever thought of it? The greatest heroes held a weakness. Achilles with his heel. Karna with his benevolence. Siegfried with his back. Baldr with the mistletoe…”

Shi Tian’s deep voice drew Griseo in, to the point she temporarily stopped painting. Her understanding of him also halted at this moment.

“Even the painting you are working on has a weakness.” He paused before adding, “It could never peer through the depths of my heart.”

“...”

The clarity in Griseo’s eyes did not match that of her naive, child self. The Griseo he was currently talking to was none other than the present Griseo!

Just then, Shi Tian posited a question.

“What do you think of immortal cultivation’s purpose?”

“...To become a True Immortal unfettered by all.”

“You are right… but also wrong.”

It was Griseo’s turn to be befuddled.

“Each of us has a different answer to that question. Some may think of the realm that lies at the end of it. Some may think of revenge, with others thinking of resurrecting their loved ones. These are colors unique to our own.”

At this moment, Shi Tian moved. He turned his face towards her, placing both his hands on his lap.

“You are forcing yourself with colors not of your own… and it hurts you.”

Seeing there was no response from her, he sighed as he continued:

“The notion of becoming perfect in this imperfect world is inherently flawed. You are making yourself into a god despite not knowing how. You are placing the cart before the horse, per se. In turn, you are harming yourself.”

The emotions in her eyes could not be hidden. They may be as still as a tranquil lake, but the light passing through them could never be hidden. Not in Shi Tian’s eyes, at the very least.

“You made me your model… viewed my most perfect state as your goal. Perhaps, in that way, the pain and suffering you experienced could be lessened.”

Rustle-!

The paintbrush on her fingertips fell to the grass. Her right hand could not stop trembling. Her childish appearance did not conceal the depressing atmosphere around her.

“But this is not the way. Not your way, at least.”

Shi Tian stood up from the boulder. His footsteps drew closer towards her.

“Your breakthrough to the Void Refinement Realm almost failed… partly because you once attempted to cut the karma connected to you. You wanted to isolate yourself from these ‘flaws’ of yours, to become someone with an unchanging nature. To live a “fresh” life unburdened by your past.”

As much as immortal cultivation brought benefits, it also brought drastic changes to everyone Shi Tian knew of. Griseo would have never done these things in the original timeline, yet she did now. When someone was suffering in silence, they would try their best to grasp onto the straw they could hold onto. That straw just so happened to be Shi Tian—or to be exact, the life Shi Tian had once lived.

By the time he reached her side, she was crying. Tears trickled down her cheek. Her face remained calm and composed, but Shi Tian sensed the turbulent emotions within.

In the end…

“You could never do it.”