Chapter 110: Hilda’s Song
I've heard that Hildekar has been working himself to the bone recently. He's had supplies sent over to the South-Western border, while Jill and Elden have been helping him haul and mine away at the ashen stone of the cave for the sake of processing it into that sleek grey stone.
I already expected him to work hard, but for it to be to this level...
Staring up at Hilda's ruby-red eyes as she carried me through the private back gardens with a hesitant face; is it his Curse?
Unfortunately, it was inappropriate to ask.
If I want to know, I'd have to ask him myself once we're close enough.
Which we're not, Hildekar is the only one I've yet to speak with properly since that day 3 years ago. Even the others have barely seen him since, not even on Esme's birthday.
"L, little dummy, are you sure it's fine for us to sneak in?"
"...How many times do I need to tell you?"
The issue with the back gardens was still consistent. Hilda believes we're not allowed in here and that we're sneaking in.
Not that we did.
My doors led us here directly.
"F, fine! But what do you want to do here?" Hilda cautiously stared around at the empty yet pretty surroundings. The distant lake shimmered with glistening reflections, dazzling my eyes with the humbling sight.
Still-
That lake feels wrong.
I don't know what exactly, but something about that damned lake just felt wrong to my soul. My very existence is subtly rejecting it.
"Set me down on the grass and leave me alone for a while. Go take a walk or something; no one will hurt you. If, and I mean if, mother, f- father... Or the Maiden catches you, just bow down and give them my name."
I'll deal with the 'consequences'.
Rolling my eyes inwardly, I reassured the big dummy with a bright smile.
If only there were real consequences for that big dummy, that way I could-
That way...
...
I'm glad there are no consequences.
I don't want Hilda to suffer, at least not the way I have. That would be...
Gritting my teeth; I would hate that.
Squish.
Fingers peeled my mouth upwards, curving it into a smile, "Stop frowning, you little dummy. You'll grow old and wrinkly! My mom said that could happen, so I should stop frowning. So you should also stop!"
Rolling my eyes again, I spoke with my mouth curled awkwardly, "I'm still 12, I'm not going to grow old and wrinkly if I frown now."
"How can you be sure?"
"Because look at me, I'm so cute and pretty."
My frank comment stumped the big dummy; take that, you stupid lass.
"You, Hilda, should be careful thou-"
Squeeze!
"Don't say another word! You stupid little dummy! Hmph!" Squeezing my face, Hilda's adorable face scrunched; even her scrunched-up face is top-tier. I'm almost jealous, but I'm not, because-
You belong to me~
Putting all that aside, Hilda carried me to an open grass field and placed me down amidst the dense white haze. Tucking me in comfortably, she double-checked with me that there were no problems before reluctantly leaving.
So many souls.
Lying in between a flood of white haze, the soothing, filling sensation returned with each breath I took; it feels good...
Eating up the dense white haze, I felt it almost instantly-
My Curses.
They're acting up.
Is it because of how close I am to the Third Step? Is it related to my version of a Cleansed?
It's possible.
But still... Consuming Souls is...
Correct. With each breath, I was consuming Souls.
That was the disgusting truth; and so-
189,471,999
189,476,946
189,481,274
...
I consumed.
One after another; countless, screeching, bleeding, white souls.
Souls screaming for their mothers.
Souls screaming for their fathers.
Souls screaming for their closest ones.
Souls screaming for their limbs to be returned.
Souls screaming for their heads to be returned.
...Souls crying for the torture to end.
For the Crucible to cease its tumble of doom.
It's profoundly disturbing.
What, you might ask?
Well, first, the fact that there are so many souls, and two... That I had no idea what the countless voices—what the countless requests were.
Butwasn'thereasetofvoicesintheredifferentfromtherest?
Voicesthatwereguidingme?
Voicesthat-
Voices-
It's disturbing, but they've been saving me.
They've been nourishing me, keeping me afloat through the years—through the 200 separate punishments.
"You have my regards, mother."
My voice drifted into the white haze, rippling it, parting it, revealing-
"Oh? My sweet Alora is thanking me?"
-revealing the billowing waves of chestnut and blue. Standing in a prim beige, loose dress, the hem of her dress fluttered whilst she held down a wide-brimmed hat from flying into the air.
"I'm glad, my dear, dear Alora. I'm truly happy. Hearing true, unclouded words of appreciation from you... How I have dreamt of this day!" Grinning with a dearly proud smile, mother stepped through the grass; the white haze parted around her—it danced around her.
It caressed her skin as she raised a finger to the air. Pressing onto the white haze, it playfully pranced away, as though shy of her presence.
Mother...
With each step taken, the Souls retreated. With each step, the world itself retreated.
It did not dare intrude upon her territory.
Thus, she arrived above me.
She eclipsed me.
Lying in her shadow, in her darkness, she smiled down at me; she gleefully giggled with one hand over her mouth and with her shoulders loose.
"My sweet Alora..."
I don't know why, but when I witnessed her mouth move, when I heard her voice trickle into my ear-
"...I love you."
-an overwhelming peace bound me.
It tied me.
It latched onto me.
"...Yes, mother."
Mechanically, perhaps even lifelessly, I responded.
"Do you love me? Sweet Alora?"
I, I, I lov-
I, I lov-
I lov-
I-
DoI?
DoIlovetheMistress?
"I love you, mother." Smiling in return, an eerily saccharine voice leaked from me. It whispered sweet love to my dear mother.
"Oh? I'm glad, my sweet Alora." Mother's oceanic eyes curled upwards as she bent down to my level.
Her hand reached out to my head and-
Pomf~
-it squished my scalp.
Gently.
Warmly.
With undoubtedly real motherly love.
Not a lie; not a falsity; but true, undeniable love.
-----
Brushing the clear, bubbling stream with her fingertips, Hilda absentmindedly hummed to herself a tune;
A tune oh-so-familiar to her, a tune familiar to the little dummy.
Except, this time, this time...
It held her emotions.
"Oh, to the me beyond the creak..."
"Oh, to the me beyond the veil..."
"I ask, I plead, I pray..."
"May the day o' nay come..."
Plunging her other hand into the stream, Hilda clasped her hands.
Ending her humming:
"Oh light above, oh Empyreans above..."
A single tear dripped from her right eye, "...I ask for forgiveness. I ask for Alora's safety."
What did she pray for? Why did she pray? For what does she ask for forgiveness? What day does she plead may never come?
Isn't it clear?
Isn't it beyond obvious?
It's ______________________.
Muttering under her breath, Hilda cupped a mouthful of water and raised it. Trickles slipped through the cracks of her fingers, sliding across, but the remainder she drank; the remainder she consumed as a vow.
A vow to never let it happen.
Listening to the cries of the damned within her, Hilda crumpled her face with a hint of pain, 'So this is what it feels like, you little, tiny, dummy...'
Hilda endured the infusion of Souls with a stiff face. She didn't allow her face to crumple any more than it already had; it was her conviction, her sheer willpower to push through the pain to gain a hint of the little dummy's incomprehensible suffering.
Patting the pain away, Hilda stood up, smacked her face a couple of times, ignoring the whispers lingering in her eardrums-
"Let's go back to that little dummy. She should have had her fill by now."
...But there was also another reason why she felt like she had to return.
A slight tug of her heartstrings calling out to her.
Walking through the back gardens, Hilda's initial steady and slow footsteps began to speed up at some point.
The call in her heart grew louder.
'Faster.'
It grew with sticky tar attached to it.
'Little dummy-'
And, when she arrived;
When she saw;
Flashes of chestnut and blue doused her vision momentarily, before the flashes dissipated and revealed the clear view of trees tumbling in the wind, grass rustling, with the faint hint of dew seeping into her nose.
And, alongside it, the scent of nothingness.
The little dummy's scent.
Lying there, her face was frozen.
Frozen with blood draining from her eyes.
Shadows slithered beneath Hilda's eyebrows, covering her eyes; taking the last few steps towards her little dummy, she knelt beside her and pulled out a handkerchief.
Gently wiping the streaks of crimson from the little dummy's face. Unfortunately, her Blessings weren't suited for cleansing purposes, so she couldn't do more than that. She could, however-
"Hap."
-pick her up and bring her over to a nearby stream of water.
Placing the little dummy by the water, Hilda wet her hands and then rubbed them across the little dummy's soft and slippery face.
'She's like a doll, this cute little dummy.'
After wiping off the dried blood with the water, Hilda patted off the remaining water till the little dummy's face was dry.
'...Now what?'