Husband of the Goblin Tribe

Usually my daughters are quite talkative, but as we moved through the Black Trees under my mass-cast Wolf-wind spell towards the road I once walked to the Night Forest upon, together with my companions Kairos and Stella, only the occasional crunches of leaves underfoot and the chirping of insects could be heard. This was an officially sanctioned mission from the Goblin’s Guild, the behest made by none other than the Lord of the Night Forest itself, the so-called Great Protector.

What was the mission?

To establish relations, friendly or otherwise, with a mostly-beastkin settlement bordering the Night Forest, and ultimately, the Bloodmaw’s Domain.

I never expected that I would be part of this ambassadorial entourage, or that I would be allowed to step foot out of the Night Forest at any point for the rest of my life, but it’s not like I had anywhere else to go even if I somehow did escape. I certainly wouldn’t be running back home to my mother’s mansion. While I don’t hate Salondra Wyze, I also don’t have a significantly deep affection for her, at least not like I did for my mother in my previous life. I am on this mission with my daughters for one reason alone. The fact that I am—or at least was—human, and that fact being something that might help the cause, even if only slightly, if at all.

Along with me on this mission are Diana Artemis, Nova, Yuna (Wise-eyes), Kiwi, Ruby, and Ebony. For the sake of not drawing attention to Ebony’s pseudo-necromantic nature, both Bitey and Beastie have remained behind at Goblinhome in the suitable care of Beet.

Everyone has a purpose for being here.

In Diana’s case, it is because she is acting as a proxy for Prima in the role of Leader and Guardian of the Tribe, and what their best interest might be.

In Nova’s case, it is because she is our physical support should things get dicey. Magic is good and all, but Beastkin are quick on their feet. It’s a good habit to have protection for our magicians, even though as magicians, none of my daughters are physically weak.

Ebony wanted to go because of a promise she made to Mint. Something about Ruling the Bloodmaw Empire? Anyway, I’m just happy to have her along with us, because I fully intend to find out if there is any beef at this settlement, and if so, we’re going to have a hamburger feast together!

Ruby’s reasons for joining are unknown to me, but I wouldn’t deny any allegations that the thought process behind it was entirely related to the reduced number of goblins who want my time all to themselves. Ruby is a chip off of Jewel’s block, and though she is quick to run hot, that’s not… always a bad thing.

Kiwi’s case is much easier to understand. She’s our Tribe’s economist goblin. She knows what goblins want to buy, and so by that chain of logic, she should know what goblins make that not-goblins want to buy. She’s also been authorized to act on behalf of Dara the Dwarf with regards to selling mined ores and whatever else it is that Dara and her apprentices make.

Yuna (Wise-eyes), is actually the party leader here, not me. As it turns out, she has inherited some aspect of what Old One calls the curse of tongues—a rather permanent magical spell cast onto her by a magus named Grant before his death which gives her fluency in pretty much any language that exists. None of us were aware she had inherited that ability until, entirely by accident, Dara had grumbled something in her native Dwarven tongue. Yuna had unintentionally answered in the same language, and as Lilac was nearby and realized those two were not talking in the human common tongue which Dara spoke fairly well and which many of my daughters also learned from me, or in Gob. Well… surprise, surprise? So, any conversations that need to take place that can’t be done in the human common tongue, will be handled by her, thus negating the need to rely on Old One.

Anything that forgoes the requirement of having Old One around is just fine with me.

Judging from the position of the sun in the sky when we started, which was sometime before noon, having reached the Western edge of the forest where the road was, under a haste spell, it took about two hours of solid running. I suggested that we take a short break so I could recover a little bit of my mana and catch my breath, to which I received no complaints, even though I could tell that only Yuna and I were the only ones actually tired.

Yuna and Kiwi sat on either side of me, with Kiwi pulling out some dried meat, and a makeshift thermos full of the non-alcoholic red water Berry made for us to snack on.

There weren’t any travelers visible on the road in either direction, so while waiting for me to catch my breath before we started moving again, Diana and Nova engaged in a light spar, while Ruby and Ebony engaged in something more… wizardly.

“Ruby! Control your fire spells, no burning down the forest, you hear me?” I shouted toward her. She might think she’s an adult goblin, but father still knows best.

Why?

Because when I was that age, I did burn down a forest… sort of. It was actually an overgrown part of the garden behind my mother’s mansion, but the point still stands.

“Husband, have you ever met any beastkin before?” Kiwi asked me, taking a big bite out of her piece of jerky.

“A few. Mostly during the short time that I was an adventurer, along with Stella.”

“What are they like?” Yuna asked, following up on Kiwi’s question.

“Not all that much different from the Bloodmaw. They tend to stick with their own kind and have their own traditions they follow. Most are friendly enough, and they respect physical strength a great deal, but probably the most important thing to know about them is that they put more weight on a person’s actions than their words.”

“How do you think they will react to seeing us?” Kiwi said, resting her head against my arm.

“They’ll probably be on guard at first. If we show that we’re not hostile, they may be willing to interact with us positively, but… it’ll likely take many interactions over time before they lower their guard and even think to trust us. That’s… just how bad the stigma goblins have among the other races.”

“What if they decide to attack us…?”

Yuna had asked the question of questions…

“We retreat. Attacking us is one thing, but if any of you… come to harm. There won’t be a settlement anymore to worry about.”

My daughters may be goblins misunderstood and despised by the outside world, but to me they are precious and irreplaceable treasures. Like a dragon guarding its hoard, I will not forgive those who dare to steal away my treasures in this life.

I momentarily thought of Mint and something she said to me before she left, something she said the future me said to her… about how the tribe fell.

Orcs from the East, Black-claws from the South, and adventurers from the West.

The Great Protector said it handled the adventurer part, but… what if that was only related to adventurers coming from Thorn to the South, and not this new settlement so close to the Night Forest?

I stretched my arms out and wrapped them around both Yuna and Kiwi, pulling them close to me for a big hug.

“I’m sure everything will be fine. And if not, then daddy will still make sure you girls are safe, no matter what, okay?”

Ting!

And just like that, Nova’s sword was knocked out of her hand by Diana, and it flew hilt over blade until it landed right between my legs, nearly scaring the piss out of me.

Nova hustled over and plucked the sword out of the ground, giving me a sour look.

“You done catching your breath yet, shitty old man?”

“Pretty much.”

“Good, then you should probably get started on some firefighting before we start moving again.”

“Firefighting?"

Daring to crane my head to where Ebony and Ruby were having a bit of a magical duel… want to guess what happens when goblins try to be sneaky and not listen to daddy by putting out random fires with what is essentially concentrated death magic?

Yeah, turns out that dead trees burn really fucking well!

~~** Interlude | Nova **~~

How that shitty old man doesn’t lose his mind and spank the fucking shit out of a few of my sisters will forever be a mystery to me. This is exactly why I don’t want to ever become a mother in this life. I wouldn’t be able to restrain myself. Prima sure had no problems swatting my ass a few times when I stepped out of line and pissed her off. It’s only hearsay to me, but Ivory spanked Ebony a few times and nearly kicked the bucket because of that. Diana laid it on her little sister, Selene, when she almost cooked Ark, Berry, and Diana in their cave-hole after stealing the old man’s magic gem thing.

But the shitty old man himself?

He would just… talk to them.

He’d get on the ground, low enough to look them in the eyes, explain what they did, why it was bad or whatever, and hug them, and it…

…It’s frustrating.

I grew up as a bastard in my former life. I was a punk kid, a hooligan, a ruffian, definitely not a virtuous person. I even led a gang of kids like me and caused all sorts of problems wherever I went. I drank and frequented whorehouses… How I became a swordmaster was still a bit of a mystery to me, to be quite honest. I just… was always fighting, so using a sword became second nature to me after a while.

But the old man… He’s happy being a father. He’s… made for it.

All while being trapped in a goblin hellhole, he’s never given anything less than his best to each and every one of his daughters, even when they take from him more than he has to give. Diana is the worst offender in that regard. She took his soul that day, when she raped him. I saw him back when Bitey dragged him out of the upstairs cave that Lumi and Ebony had to blast a hole open into. The look on his face was that of a man who already went through all the stages of grief and accepted death like it was the last act of a merciful god.

The old man tried to be decent, tried to be human, but these goblins just wouldn’t let him hold on to his humanity easily. One by one they continued to break him down and to not lose his mind completely, he had to concede a part of his human morality. That was when his inner demon took over. It takes incredible strength to be a good person, but there will always be a limit to that strength.

I have the strength to endure being a female goblin, I can find solace in it while swinging my sword, disassociating where I need to. But to be a parent? I retain my memories as a human, as does Lumi, but both of us are aware that there is something inside of us, whatever this origin blood is… that asserts itself upon us, remind us that though we have the memories of humans, ultimately, we are goblins now. Nothing will change that fact in this new life we have been reborn into.

I once promised Lumi that I would be her Knight and protect her until such a time as we found a way to escape. Lumi… freed me from that oath the day after Gremory came into the world. I was bothered by it for a while, but I also understood her reasoning after seeing the old man walk around goblinhome with their child, hanging upside down with her legs locked around his neck.

She had been defeated by her own Motherhood.

Lumi most likely understood that there was no way for us to change back into what we once were. There was no place for our children to find peace outside of the safety of Goblinhome. There was only… surrender to the inevitable.

And yet, here we are. Six of us siblings together with the shitty old man leaving the safety of the Night Forest and doing the unthinkable—leaving on a quest to try and forge positive relations with a settlement full of beastkin. I dare to think that if the beastkin are willing to listen to him, he might actually convince them. I just pray they aren’t foolish enough to try and attack us without warning.

“What are you thinking about, Kiddo?”

The old man dropped his hand on top of my head and ruffled my hair.

“Just wondering when you’re going to try laying your hands on me.”

The old man stopped dead in his tracks while I continued walking, his frozen hand slipping off of my head.

“Nova, I…”

I turned around and pulled down on my lower eyelid and stuck my tongue out at him like Glace often did. His face took on a nauseating complex.

“Relax, you shitty old man, I’m just fucking with you. I was actually thinking about whether or not any of the beastkin at the settlement are female, and if they are, will they have gigantic melons for me to enjoy looking at.”

Ark, who had been frozen from my earlier words, began to move again.

“Fox beastkin.” He replied.

“I remember, a few years before I became an adventurer, back when I was a student at a magical academy… there was a small holiday when I didn’t go back to my mother’s mansion and instead stayed in the dorms… um… a shared cave-hole I lived in with a few other boys my age. One of them was the daring type, and he dared me and the others to go out and visit a certain place that adult men would frequent. When we took the dare and ended up at that place, there… were a few beastkin there, but the most memorable one to me was a Fox beastkin—don’t ask me which tribe they were from—that had more than one tail. She also had two huge breasts that could almost put Krushka’s to shame.”

“Did you enjoy yourself with her?” I asked, knowing full well that Ark’s first sexual experience was with my goblin mother, Prima.

“No. I was a coward and backed out at the last minute. I… wasn’t looking for a brief encounter like that… I wanted something more…”

“Green?” I quipped.

The old man just shook his head. I couldn’t help but laugh at him. He may be my father, but he’s also way too easy to mess around with.

“Mine.” He said in a soft voice, giving an answer more to himself perhaps, than to me.

“Look, smoke in the sky.” Diana half-shouted from further ahead of us.

It seems we will be arriving at the beastkin settlement before the sun sets. Here’s to hoping for the best—that we don’t have to massacre anyone, that Kiwi can conduct some business that might result in physical coin, and that there is a fox beastkin with fat tits wandering around somewhere that might not care if a pair of eyes watches her a bit too closely…

~~** Interlude | Mags the Adventurer **~~

“Mags, come quick! Big threat!”

While finishing my patrol around the forested area surrounding the sawmill, Miyaya came rushing towards me, yelling about some kind of emergency. Apparently… Raiyon, who was patrolling the front of the settlement by the road, spotted what he thought to be a small raiding party of goblins and… something that looked human.

I felt my stomach clench… there was no way, right? It… couldn’t be them, could it?

“Let’s go.” I said, quickly running alongside Miyaya towards the entrance to the settlement.

When we got there, Raiyon and Tigara were already standing defensively in front of the group of seven, six of whom were unmistakably goblins, and the other being none other than My Lord. Since Raiyon and Tigara could barely speak any of the human common tongue, there is no way they could communicate, but… it’s also strange that they hadn’t attacked them, either.

This was not going to end well, of that I was certain.

Miyaya spoke in her beastkin language to the other two, who then spoke back before Miyaya relayed to me in her broken common tongue what was going on.

“Raiyon say Goblins not attack. One speaks our language, says… come to… trade?”

“The Human?” I asked, pointing at My Lord.

Raiyon instead pointed at none other than my younger sister, Wise-eyes.

“Miyaya, do you plan to drive them away?”

“That why Miyaya come find Mags. If no need fight, then no want fight. But no can let Goblins in settlement with weapons.”

“If I can convince them to give up their weapons, will you let them… trade?”

“Only can let in, keep watch on them. If others do trade with, Miyaya have no say.”

“What about the Chief, shouldn’t they be handling this sort of thing?”

“Chief leave decision to security forces. We ones responsible.”

“Miyaya, I’ve… dealt with goblins before. Can I have your word that if I can get them to put down their weapons and invite them in, that they won’t be attacked by you, Raiyon, or Tigara?”

“Miyaya agree, so long as Miyaya in charge of weapons until goblins leave.”

“Alright, then… let me try and talk to them, okay?”

Miyaya nodded and I stepped forward, pulling out my katana, Kogarasumaru, pointing it at My Lord and gesturing with my other hand which was obstructed from the other beastkin in front of my body.

Play along with me, otherwise… trouble.

My Lord nodded, then spoke in Gob to my sisters to not say anything for now, until he said otherwise.

“We are the security force for the Tree Lake Forest settlement. Why have you come?” I spoke in the human common tongue My Lord had me learn from my earliest days as a strong-one.

My Lord put his hand on Wise-eyes’s shoulder and she began to reply, also in common, and better than my own.

“We are from the Night Forest and have come to trade things. We do not wish to fight, only to trade.” Follow current novᴇls on novel fire.net

I nodded.

“You are goblins. You must understand that we cannot let you enter so long as you have weapons. If you are willing to hand them over, we will allow you to enter and will return them when you leave, but you will be watched closely by us while you are here. Do you agree to this?”

My Lord spoke to the others, saying that they should play along and surrender their weapons. Diana disagreed with him, not wanting to give hers up, but Nova said arrogantly enough that it would be fine and that they wouldn’t even need them if this was what the settlement called security. Diana wasn’t carrying Ripper or Bleed on her, instead she had the weapon My Lord used in combat when he sparred with Nova, the thing called a burnblade. She reluctantly handed it over to Nova and crossed her arms in silent anger at being made to relinquish it anyway.

My Lord collected both Diana’s sword, Nova’s sword, and… if I’m not mistaken, Ruby’s whip. Did Ruby undergo a Blood Fury since I’ve been gone? Wise-eyes didn’t have any visible weapons, the closest thing to a weapon the one goblin I didn’t know had were some gloves, but she wore an outfit similar to the Shaman’s, only it looked more like a Black-claw than anything else… and Ebony, I wasn’t going to say anything about her wand. I also didn’t fail to notice the absence of both Beastie and Bitey by her side.

Wise-eyes spoke again, “What would you like us to do with the weapons?”

“Place them down on the ground, and step back so that we may collect them.”

My Lord did as I said and after laying them down on the ground, stepped back along with my sisters. I turned to Miyaya and told her to go collect them, which she did. Once that was done, Miyaya gave me an approving nod.

“Alright. You may enter our settlement to conduct your trade. We cannot guarantee anyone will be willing, and I will be the one to accompany you for now, so do not cause any unnecessary trouble while you are here. Understand?”

I could feel Diana Artemis staring me down with pure contempt. Even if I had my weapon and she didn’t, I still wouldn’t want to fight her again. I didn’t really want to see any of them so soon. I also couldn’t help but wonder about the youngest one among them. Was she Melon’s strong-one? If she was a bit more blue-skinned, I’d think she was Truffle’s.

I turned to Miyaya and told her that I would keep an eye on them for now, she could go store the weapons in the security forces barracks until it was time for them to leave. She nodded and left with both Tigara and Raiyon, who looked rather relieved at how the situation played out.

Alone with everyone now, but still with many eyes from residents of the settlement fixed on us, I began to speak softly in Gob, hoping to understand why everyone had come here.

“First things first,” My Lord spoke, pushing the youngest goblin in front of himself, “Kiwi, introduce yourself to your big sister, Magpie.”

“I am Kiwi, Pear is my Maker.”

“Not very fat for being Pear’s strong-one. Thought you might be Melon’s at first.”

“No, Beet is Melon’s strong-one.” Kiwi replied.

“Beet?”

“Ah… it’s been a while. You have quite a lot of new sisters in the months that you’ve been gone. Also, you… should know that Crow is doing well. She’ll be having another strong-one soon enough.” My Lord said, leaving me feeling like I had been punched in the stomach by Diana.

Crow.

My Maker.

She… wasn’t dead?

“I’m sure you have questions, and I’ll answer as many as you want until you’re satisfied. But, for now, do you think you can introduce us to someone willing to trade with… some goblins? You might not believe it, but Kiwi here is a born trader.”

I stared at Pear’s strong-one, and she looked back at me.

“And a Hunter. She’s also killed a Black-claw and protected Husband all by herself.”

Diana said something rather unbelievable just then.

“Diana Artemis was younger when she killed many, but Kiwi used only her claws and not a knife. Big proud of Kiwi.”

“So what? Next thing you’ll tell me is that she’s an adult goblin too? Nevermind. Mags has changed her mind. Stay here, I’ll get your weapons from Miyaya and you can go back to Goblinhome right away. No need to enter the settlement.”

I probably could have stomached it if it was Button saying that, but Diana Artemis?

“Wait.”

Nova took a step forward after telling me to wait, but I hadn’t put away my katana yet and leveled it right at her.

“At least let Kiwi do what she came to do. This… ah… old man, explain it to her.”

“No need, Nova. We’ll return as soon as Magpie returns our weapons.”

“Husband, why did we come all this way if we’re going to leave without doing what we came to do?”

Diana argued with My Lord.

“Because, Diana, there is something called diplomacy, which you have failed at using correctly.”

“What’s Diplomacy?”

“Diplomacy is how you act towards someone when you need to get something done and cannot afford to fail. You may not understand what has happened, but Magpie is in a role similar to you in this place. She is one of their Guardians, and so her position is no different from yours in Goblinhome. What she says, in this place, is what goes. If she says we are welcome, we are welcome. If she says we are not welcome, then we leave. That is the way of the outside world.”

“Magpie is a Bloodmaw.”

“Maybe so, but Magpie has also left Goblinhome. She is not bound to the goblin way out here.”

“What does that have to do with anything Diana Artemis said?”

Nova stepped in.

“Diana… at home, you’re the boss, we all understand that. But here, you’re just the Leader of the Bloodmaw in Prima’s place. The way you spoke to her is something others would consider rude… Old man, care to explain what manners are to her?”

“Nova, that’s about the only thing I’ve never been able to get across to anyone, except Magpie.”

“Are you kidding me?”

My Lord shook his head.

“Feel free and give it a shot.”

“Ah, fuck… I wouldn’t even know where to begin…”

A voice called out from behind me, making me feel even more on edge. My beastkin friend and partner, Pomelo.

“Mags, hon, are you alright?”

“Mags is fine, Pomelo. You should go back inside.”

“That Human… those goblins… are they…?”

“Pomelo!”

“...Bloodmaw?”