Chapter 120: Village
"Why? Is it because you do not like me? Or because I once hated you?" She inquired, her expression turning serious.
"No, it is not about you. It is me. I cannot love someone...I find it hard to embrace people," he stated, his voice devoid of emotion.
Mia scoffed. "I am not just ’people.’ I am your mate. Is that not reason enough to want to be committed to me? Isn’t that what everyone hopes for? To find their mate?" She questioned him, her voice laced with frustration. Though she had once been guilty of loving a man who was not her mate, she now realized how wrong she had been. She should have waited for the one fate had chosen for her instead of trying to forge a love where it did not belong.
"Not me, Mia. I have never, even once, wanted a mate," he responded, earning a bitter smile from her.
"And you do not wish to try? To embrace your new reality?" She asked, her voice quieter this time.
"No. If you marry me, you will only end up miserable. I cannot love you the way you want to be loved. Can’t you see that? I yelled at you outside simply for standing up for yourself. I am broken in a way you cannot fix," he divulged, and Mia didn’t know whether to feel worse for him or for herself. She had always known there was something deeply wrong with him, but she hadn’t realized the extent of it. How could a man reject the very idea of loving his mate? How could he not even try?
"I know, Ray. I am well aware that you are broken," she admitted and suddenly burst into laughter, though there was nothing joyous about it. It was a laugh of sorrow, not amusement.
"I was assigned to be your guard during this war. That is the only reason I have been following you around," he revealed, and in that instant, everything became painfully clear to her. She had been delusional all along, foolishly believing there was something deeper between them when, in truth, he had merely been fulfilling his duty.
"I understand," she said, forcing a smile. "And I am capable of protecting myself. I do not need a guard." She lied through her teeth, but inwardly, she was burning with anger. She wanted to scream at him, to demand why he had waited until now to tell her this. But after crying for hours, she no longer had the strength to argue.
"You can love another," he said after a moment. "And when you decide you want to be free, I will reject you." He thought he was being considerate, but she scoffed inwardly, irritated that he truly believed he was doing her a favor.
"Hmm. Okay," she responded flatly, not bothering to express how she truly felt. It had been an ill-fated bond from the very beginning, and she had been foolish to entertain second thoughts about it.