Chapter 100 - Hundred
She looked at her wrist, hidden beneath the covers, and then replied, her back still turned to him. "Being normal," she said, her voice a quiet, sad murmur, "is the hardest thing in the world to do."
The rain continued to drum against the roof of the small island room, a steady, rhythmic beat that seemed to match the slow, heavy pounding of Delia’s own heart.
Eric’s voice was soft, careful, as if he were speaking to a frightened bird. "What do you mean by that?"
"I have never lived a truly happy day in my life," Delia replied, the words a simple, devastating confession to the darkness. "And I feel like I never will. Because even if I find a moment of happiness, I don’t know how long it will last. Nothing good ever lasts for me."
"Delia," Eric called her name, a soft plea for her to turn around, to face him.
But his gentleness was too much to bear. It felt more dangerous than any of Augusta’s cruel words. With a sudden, angry movement, she got up from the bed. "I can’t sleep if you keep talking to me," she said, her voice sharp with a frustration that was directed more at herself than at him.
She grabbed her pillow and blanket. "I will just sleep on the floor."
As she made a move to get down from the bed, to create that familiar, safe distance between them, Eric’s hand shot out and held her wrist, his grip gentle but firm. He pulled her down so she was sitting on the edge of the bed, close to him.
She tried to yank her hand free, her first instinct always being to run, to hide. "Let me go," she said, though her voice lacked any real conviction. It was of no use. His grip was too strong, too steady. " I said let me go."
"Be honest with me, Delia," Eric replied, his voice a low, serious murmur. "Don’t you trust me? After everything, do you still think my feelings for you aren’t real?"
"Yes," she replied, the honest answer surprising even herself. "I don’t trust you." She finally turned to look at him, her eyes shining with unshed tears in the dim candlelight. "But it’s not just you, Eric. I don’t trust anyone. Whenever I put my trust in something, or someone, I always end up being wrong. I always end up getting hurt."