Chapter 105: SOFIA
Playing it safe has always been one of my mantras. Especially in navigating the cruel uneven trails of my life.
It is the only reason why I’ve made it this far... yet. It’s almost like a voice telling me to consider the pros and cons of a situation before making a decision. It’s kinda like the list I always make before deciding on something.
And now more than ever, it tugged at me even as I almost succumbed to the burning thirst to know. It’s a diver ready to pull me from the depths of the bottomless chasm of my inquisitiveness.
It had me questioning again if this so-called ’main reason’ was worth telling this stranger about the recent caprices of my life. And it also had me second guessing the story he shared with me, if it held such high stakes then why was he offering me the choice of leaving with that knowledge?
Could he have lied? Or perhaps, he spoke the truth, but wasn’t bothered by the implications of me being in the know of such news.
Knowing him, he must be the kind that shrugs off something as high stakes as marriage. Because it will only be a front, a filter to his perfect image. The wife won’t matter, because to him, it will be just another business transaction, another contract.
There was only one way to know whether all this was worth shit, I had to test him. I had to push him and see if he would react.
With that resolve, I looked at him again. His face remained unreadable and he still appeared to be immersed by whatever was on his screen. As far as he was concerned, I was no longer there. And that vexed me, most.
How he could reveal such detail about his life and seconds later, pretend as if it meant nothing. Had his stuttering been rehearsed, his hesitation to tell me, had it all been staged?
If it were, he deserved "Best Performance Award", but I would know soon enough.
My plan was simple: stand up and pretend to be leaving. If he calls me back or reacts in any way that indicates he’s being truthful, before I reach the door, then I will come back and tell him what he wants to hear. But if he maintains this I-don’t-care attitude, then my curiosity be damned, I will leave without looking back even once.
I stood up and felt his eyes lift beyond the screen to my face. It was a sign and my hopes soared, until his eyes returned back to the screen.