Chapter 25: The Great Mall Explosion
Jin stood in the center of the store with his beggar like clothes, like a general addressing his troops, his chest puffed out with protagonist confidence. The crowd had quieted to a dull murmur, phones raised and recording, waiting for whatever earth-shattering revelation this delusional taxi driver was about to deliver.
"As I was saying," Jin announced with theatrical gravitas, "I am Jin Ashera, and I—"
That’s when Vincent’s 300 VP investment decided to make its grand debut.
BOOOOOOOOOOM!
The sound that erupted from Jin’s ass could only be described as if someone had detonated a small nuclear device filled with the concentrated essence of every sewage treatment plant in the city. It wasn’t just a fart—it was a biological weapon of mass destruction, a symphony of intestinal rebellion that shook the very foundations of the mall.
But the sound was only the beginning of a war.
What followed was an explosion that would have made military demolitions experts weep with envy. From Jin’s trembling form erupted a geyser of brown devastation that defied every law of physics, gravity, and good taste. It was as if someone had loaded a cannon with liquid chocolate and fired it in every direction at once.
The first wave hit the sneering woman with the trowel makeup like a tsunami.
"NOOOOOOO!" she screamed, her voice reaching octaves that could shatter crystal. "MY GERMÈS BAG! MY BOTOX! MY BLERRGGG!" she couldn’t help but vomit on the man beside her.
The fat rich man, her sugar daddy, stood frozen for exactly 2.2 seconds before feeling something warm from his lover, his DO-or-DIE response kicked in. Unfortunately for his girlfriend, he chose DO and literally threw her toward the brown explosion like a human shield.
"Every man for himself!" he bellowed, attempting to sprint toward the exit with all the grace of a wounded pig.
But karma, much like Jin’s rebellion, had impeccable timing.