Chapter 73
Chapter 73
Kaeleen’s POV
The drive home from the office was one of the longest of my life. Every stop at a red light felt like an eternity. Every second of passed reminded me of the last time I had seen Astrid. When I had woken up this morning, the house felt too quiet and I had chickened out if seeing her for fear of what she would say or the expressions I would see on her face.
All day, I had been haunted by the image of her panicked eyes. I had replayed the moment of the kiss a thousand times, each time kicking myself harder. I should not have done that. Ryker wasn’t even helping matters with how moody he was, grumbling every second and reminding me of the reasons why I should not have regretted the kiss especially since I enjoyed it. But the expression on her face...fuck.
Even at work, there had been no escape. Alex had taken one look at my face during the meeting and knewbthat something was wrong.
"Trouble in paradise already?" he’d teased, leaning back in his chair with a smirk. "Don’t tell me you messed things up with Astrid before you all even really began."
Normally, I would have shot back a witty retort. But today, his words hit too close to home. I had just grunted in response, which only made his smirk widen. He’d let it go, sensing my foul mood, but the comment lingered. I had messed it up. I had a goddess in my home, a woman who was the other half of my soul, and I had scared her.
The thought was so unbearable that on the way home, I did something I hadn’t done in years. I pulled over and walked into a small flower shop. I was surrounded by the bright colors and overwhelming scents of roses and lilies, but none of them felt right. Roses were too aggressive, too passionate. Lilies felt too formal. Then I saw them, tucked away in a corner. A bucket of White tulips.
They were perfect. Elegant, understated, and beautiful. The florist told me they symbolized forgiveness and new beginnings. It was exactly the message I wanted to send. I wanted to ask for her forgiveness, and I wanted to promise her a new start, one where I wouldn’t be such a thoughtless idiot.
And again, the flowers depicted Astrid. She was understated. She had been underestimated but I knew she was beautiful. And damn she was elegant and beautiful. Her voice was like music to my ears. With that thought in mind, I purchased the flowers.
Now, I stood at the bottom of the staircase, the one that led to her bedroom, the bouquet of tulips feeling flimsy and inadequate in my hand. Every step I took up the stairs felt heavier than the last. My heart pounded against my ribs with the nervous energy of a teenager asking a girl on a first date. I had faced down rogue Alphas and negotiated with hostile human politicians without breaking a sweat, but the thought of facing Astrid after what I’d done made my palms slick.