Chapter 200: How to Win Girls and Annihilate Villages
“Good work, Kakashi.”
Seeing his elder brother fall silent, Senju Tobirama felt utterly satisfied. He turned his head toward Kakashi.
“You’re Gen’s teacher. Sometimes you should help adjust his mindset.”
“…”
Kakashi rubbed at his white hair, looking a little lost.
Gen’s mindset… does that really need adjusting?
He’s far more extreme than you!
“…Understood.”
“And also, could you bring Hiruzen here? Since Gen has settled on that jinchūriki brat, let’s give it a try.”
“…”
“Oh, and about the matter of the daimyō—remember to have Gen sound him out.”
“…”
You two really have no bottom line, huh?
...
“Argh! Why hasn’t it started yet?!”
Konohagakure, training field.
Naruto sat by the river, grumbling in frustration. Beside him, Sasuke rolled his eyes and shot him a glare.
“Idiot. Someone’s training us and you’re still acting like this?”
“Hey, he keeps using me for who-knows-what! You’ve got no right to talk!”
Naruto snapped, shouting straight at Sasuke. Sasuke only snorted and cast a sidelong glance at Kitagawa Gen.
“Who knows about you. Either way, I think it’s worth it. If I can just—”
“Don’t look at me like that. Haven’t I already told you the trick behind Purple Lightning?”
Of course Gen noticed Sasuke’s little glance. He shook his head and spoke calmly.
“Control of chakra is the key. Both nature transformation and shape transformation must be pushed to their limits. If you can’t achieve that, then I can’t continue teaching you.”
Sasuke had already approached Gen, asking to be taught—so that one day he could face Uchiha Itachi.
To Gen, the request was somewhat outrageous. Still, given how things had turned out under his maneuvering, Sasuke likely no longer looked to Orochimaru.
And with Orochimaru denied any chance of reaching Sasuke, Gen hadn’t refused. After all, Sasuke had real talent for Lightning Release.
What’s more, Sasuke carried Indra’s chakra. Gen wanted to see what new possibilities that might bring.
“I understand, Gen-senpai. I’ll work hard.”
Sasuke nodded earnestly, his tone honest. Now, he recognized only Kitagawa Gen—completely and wholeheartedly.
That day, though he had been taken away, he had witnessed just how terrifyingly powerful this man was.
One of the Legendary Sannin, Orochimaru. The Fourth Raikage. The Fourth Kazekage. And even a massive beast…
He had seen firsthand the destruction wrought by that monstrous creature. It was because of its appearance that they had been forced to retreat.
And having followed Jiraiya for so long, he knew well that the so-called “super pervert” might seem unreliable, but was in fact formidable.
Orochimaru, one of the Sannin, was by no means weak. And two Kage—he understood clearly what that meant.
Yet Kitagawa Gen had not only crushed that beast, but faced all three at once—defeated them, and even killed two of them!
'To be that strong… no wonder he could take down Uchiha Itachi with a single strike.'
Now Sasuke’s mind held only one thought: if he followed Kitagawa Gen diligently, he would one day kill Uchiha Itachi with his own hands.
“I won’t let you down, Senpai!”
Kitagawa Gen looked at Sasuke speechlessly, when Naruto, grumbling beside them, suddenly chimed in.
“You never teach me anything either! Seriously—and how the hell are you so strong anyway?”
“Go master that pervy sage’s stuff first, then talk.”
Gen rolled his eyes, but Naruto’s muttering didn’t stop.
“And fine, you’re strong, I get it—but why are you so popular too?”
“Huh?”
“I mean, seriously. You don’t even look that special, so why do so many girls like you?”
“…”
Gen was left baffled, while Naruto pouted and leaned his head closer, giving him a curious once-over.
That was the last straw. Gen reached out and shoved Naruto’s head away.
“Back off. Of course they like me—I’m handsome and strong. What, you expect them to like you instead?”
“Damn it! How can nobody notice how rotten your personality is?!”
“If you dare spread nonsense, I’ll make sure you stay a genin for life.”
“…”
Naruto instantly wilted. He just couldn’t understand how someone’s personality could be this nasty.
For some reason, right now, he really wanted to punch Kitagawa Gen.
Too bad he couldn’t win.
Sasuke, on the other hand, gave a small nod. Watching Naruto suffer—while maybe a bit much—still felt incredibly satisfying.
“And hey, if we’re talking about popularity, wasn’t Sasuke way more popular than me back in the Academy?”
Gen tilted his head toward Sasuke, pointing at him. Sasuke immediately tensed.
“Senpai, my heart is set only on revenge. I have no other intentions.”
“Pfft, asking him was pointless!”
Naruto couldn’t help curling his lip, his face full of disdain.
“You two…”
Gen shook his head, then suddenly glanced around to make sure no one else was near. Lowering his voice, he spoke in a conspiratorial tone.
“Actually, when it comes to attracting the opposite sex—or managing relationships—I do have a few special methods.”
“Huh?!”
Naruto’s eyes lit up. Sasuke frowned, but still leaned in, curious.
“Take a look at this.”
Gen reached into his tool pouch with exaggerated secrecy. A moment later, he pulled out a small, orange-red book and placed it on the ground.
On the cover, in bold characters, were the words: Make-Out Paradise.
“No way—”
Naruto’s eyes went wide. Even Sasuke’s face showed sheer disbelief.
“Kakashi-sensei’s Make-Out Paradise?”
“Mhm.”
Gen nodded, smiling nonchalantly.
“Kakashi-sensei may not be married yet—no, he’s still a lifelong bachelor—but his charm in Konoha is unmatched.”
“…”
“Guess how he keeps that charm?”
“…”
“All the secrets are right here. Techniques, every single one of them, inside this book.”
Naruto’s breathing quickened. He couldn’t shake the feeling that something about this book was off—after all, Kakashi never let him read it, and even Jiraiya avoided explaining it to him.
But at this moment, his curiosity was eating him alive.
Even Sasuke, face full of disdain, couldn’t stop his eyes from flicking toward it—clearly curious too.
“Hey, Gen!”
Just then, a voice called from the distance. Startled, the two boys instantly pulled their heads back.
But when they looked up, they saw Deidara and Terumi Mei waving to them from across the river, which made them both exhale in relief.
“Seriously… what do they want from me this time?”
Gen stood up at once. After a moment’s thought, he spoke.
“You two train on your own. I’ve got something to do.”
“Oh.”
Naruto nodded. Sasuke, however, noticed that Gen’s book was still lying on the ground. He couldn’t help but speak up.
“Senpai, your—mmph!”
Before he could finish, Naruto clapped a hand over his mouth.
“Don’t shout, idiot! Don’t you want to see the book that both Kakashi-sensei and Gen praise so much?”
“…”
Sasuke froze, then after a moment’s thought, he slowly nodded.
Only then did Naruto grin and let go.
Watching Gen walk off with Deidara and Terumi Mei, Naruto immediately snatched up the book and opened it.
“Let’s see what exactly they’re all reading!”
“Stop yapping. Hurry up.”
Sasuke leaned in too, curiosity etched across his face.
But after just a few pages, both of them felt their breathing grow heavy, their faces flushing bright red.
“What the hell is this?!”
...
“Oi, why are you grinning so weirdly?”
On the far side of the river, already joined with Deidara and Terumi Mei, Kitagawa Gen’s face twisted into a wicked smile.
This drew Deidara’s curiosity, while Terumi Mei looked faintly puzzled.
“Nothing much. Just a little prank. Won’t cause any real harm.”
Gen shrugged carelessly. Make-Out Paradise was something he’d left behind on purpose. Of course he’d read it himself too—and honestly, there wasn’t much to it.
He never quite understood how a book written by an old bachelor could have Kakashi, another lifelong bachelor, so utterly obsessed.
Was it really supposed to be that good?
But after reading it once through, Gen had only been disappointed. There wasn’t anything special about the “romance” inside.
'Not even a single proper ‘taste test’—no wonder Naruto’s ghostwriting turns out better than yours!'
And really, it wasn’t surprising. After all, Jiraiya was a hopeless bachelor who’d chased after Tsunade for half his life without ever succeeding.
Relying on him? Completely pointless.
“Alright, enough of that. What did you two come looking for me for?”
Kitagawa Gen shook his head, giving the two of them a strange look. Terumi Mei pointed at Deidara.
“I was dragged out by him too. I don’t really know what this is about.”
“Heh, obviously I called you here because I’m already prepared!”
Deidara grinned wickedly, then pulled out a pile of scrolls and dropped them onto the ground.
“All the things you’ve been worrying about—I’ve got them covered!”
“Huh?”
Gen and Terumi Mei were both stunned. This guy… so enthusiastic?
“What exactly did you prepare?”
Gen casually picked up one of the scrolls, asking with a peculiar expression. Deidara replied with a cheerful smirk.
“Clay! I’ve stockpiled loads of clay these past days, perfect for explosions. On top of that, I snagged a bunch of top-grade soldier pills from the old man.”
“Snagged?”
“That’s right—snagged. These are specially made, trust me, they’re top quality!”
“…”
“And besides that, I also used the old man’s name to requisition a bunch of intel on Kumogakure from the village!”
“…”
“You know, back when the Third Raikage died in the Land of Earth, we almost went to war, so we gathered a ton of information. Now it all works out for me!”
“…”
Gen and Terumi Mei exchanged a glance. Was this guy emptying out Iwagakure’s resources all by himself?
“And of course, I’ve prepped a huge stash of explosive tags, shinobi tools, and all that stuff.”
Deidara kept on grinning, completely unaware of the scale of what he’d done.
“As for the rest, we just fight first and talk later."
"Hit them hard, make them realize our strength, make them believe we’ve always been right there breathing down their necks!"
"Once they’re shaken, a lot of problems will solve themselves, won’t they?”
[New Side Quest Acquired]
[Kumogakure Crush Plan]
[Strike First—Ask Questions While Hitting]
Staring at the suddenly updated quest, Kitagawa Gen fell into silence. After a moment, he turned toward Terumi Mei.
“What do you think?”
“I’ll follow your lead.”
After a brief pause, Terumi Mei finally spoke.
“Your strength is the greatest, and retreating safely depends on you, so…”
“Then Gen should be the captain!”
Deidara blurted out immediately, eyes locked onto Gen.
“So, what do you say? Sounds good, right?”
“In that case…”
Gen hesitated briefly, then turned his gaze toward the distance.
“We’ll prepare just a bit more—best to leave a clone behind. Then we set out. Our target this time is Kumogakure!”
“Hell yeah!”
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I will post some extra Chapters in Patreon, you can check it out. >> /TitoVillar
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