Chapter 592: Test
I sat on the edge of the bed, blood trickling down my back, soaking the rags of my dress. The once-delicate white silk now resembled the red ribbon sash at my waist. Darker brown hues marred the crimson, the fabric crusty with drying blood.
It was gruesome, yet... vibrant. Such a rich, visceral color. It had taken me some time after awakening from my vision to even realize my eyes had regained some strength. Now, though, I couldn’t close them. The shabby ruins of the room were truly beautiful. The broken glass, battered furniture, and grains of the hardwood floor...they had sharp, defined edges. Actual edges.
Distant objects remained slightly blurred, but it was nothing compared to the shadowy hell I’d stumbled through, wandering blindly through the streets, unaware if anyone had seen me or was closing in. If I had to wake up to that same, senseless world...
My senses had returned, but my options were still bleak. Without mana, I was utterly helpless. Any soldier, even the greenest first-level recruit, could overpower me. And if Luke found me, I would just be a liability, requiring all his efforts to care for me.
The last time I’d felt this helpless was when my master, Lord Byron, bound my soul and tortured me. Only Fate’s intervention had allowed me to escape to Heartland, where kind strangers nursed me back to health. But here? The only people in this city were the kind who had sold me to the Circle.
So...wouldn’t it be better if I continued to stay here? Luke and Jessia were causing the Empire problems, and if they called their armies, they should be able to break through. There were the skyships, of course, but Borealis had proved their defenses were far weaker than their attack power. Now that they were exposed, it wouldn’t be too difficult for the demons to compose countermeasures.
I hugged my legs to my chest, rocking back and forth. Something felt wrong, a piece missing from the puzzle. R’lissea wasn’t in immediate danger, Fable was still out there, and I was...I was...trying to hide.
Tears welled up in my eyes, and I sniffled. I hadn’t come here to hide. I had promised Luke I would help him destroy the church and free this world from their shadow. Hiding now, while everyone else fought...what was the point of it all? Wouldn’t that prove Soltair right? That I was a burden and incapable of contributing anything meaningful to a cause that mattered. That was why Aurle had died.
I was helpless then, and I was helpless now. Nothing had changed.