Chapter 562: Torn
Luke and R’lissea fell silent, and I was grateful for their ignorance of the full extent of my past. Reliving the betrayals and darkness of my final days at the Divine Throne was agonizing enough, let alone the horrors of High Valley. They couldn’t know that, right?
But I had forgotten just how intimately Luke knew me. My heart lurched as he spoke, delving deep and exposing the last shadows in my heart.
"After she was sold, Aurle got close to her."
"Aurle?" R’lissea’s head tilted, her brow furrowed. "She’s called that name in her sleep a lot, usually right before she wakes up crying from nightmares."
"Does that happen often?" Luke asked, his voice laced with concern.
R’lissea shrugged, her response catching me off guard. "Almost every night," she admitted, "but we’ve all gotten used to it. I don’t even think Xiviyah remembers it most of the time, as she’s never mentioned it before. Elise or I usually sit with her and hold her hand until she falls back asleep. But tell me, who is Aurle?"
I did? I remembered having nightmares a few times a week, but every night? Most were so vivid and real that I couldn’t imagine forgetting them. They seemed like penance for the many times I’d been too weak or fallen short, constantly tormenting me with my failures over and over again. Sometimes, they were mixed with visions, giving me a glimpse of a future that might have happened, like if I hadn’t managed to save Elise or if Korra hadn’t stopped Alex in time.
The anger that had hardened Luke’s features melted away, replaced by a deep sadness. "Aurle is the name of a slave," he said, his voice heavy with grief. "Probably the only reason Xiviyah is here at all. Aurle loved and cared for her, and in the end, allowed herself to be tortured and raped so that Xiviyah could live a little longer. I don’t know how many times, or how long it went on, but she... she gave the only thing a slave can give."
"She died?" R’lissea’s hand flew to her mouth, tears welling in her eyes.
"She died so that Xiviyah might live."
Tears streamed down my face as I curled into a ball, sobs wracking my body. Each agonizing memory was dragged to the surface, exposed and raw, leaving me no escape, no refuge.