Chapter 141: Clinging Shadows
The Grand Library existed as the intellectual heart of the Western University. The institution was divided into four sprawling wings, whose graceful towers soared high into the alpine air and dark basements entrenched within the depths of the mountains. Almost a third of the campus was connected with the library in some way, laced together by an intricate network of tunnels and corridors, lined with gems, precious metals, and luminous runes.
The vast assortment of spells and knowledge surpassed the furthest reach of my imagination, being the sole reason behind the pretentious claims that the city was a holy land for mages. Endless rows of shelves, seamlessly crafted through some long-lost magical technique, displayed student thesis and ancient, elvish grimoires on equal standing, proclaiming the belief that true knowledge was precious, regardless of source. If only this world felt the same about people.
In the highest reaches of the northern towers, far away from prying eyes, I sat in a small booth-like alcove across from Fyren. The harsh light of the noon-day sun filtered through sheer curtains, filling the room with a soft purple glow. There, under his scrutinous gaze, I revealed the truth of my nature and abilities, sharing the many sufferings and fears I’d carried since arriving at the Divine Throne.
When at last I fell silent, he leaned across the oaken table, resting his forearms on the polished bark ring edging the circumference of the table. He said nothing, for a time, and I rubbed my horns nervously.
"I’m sorry for hiding it from you," I said, bowing my head. "I meant to tell you sooner, but...um, you know."
He nodded slowly, his eyes never leaving my face. Sparks of his inner chaos danced throughout his irises, the pale orange glow suffusing the shadows of his face. Normally, I found that fascinating, and could stare into his flickering eyes forever, but they smoldered with something I didn’t recognize, and that made me uneasy.
At long last, he released a long and heavy sigh. My breath caught in my throat as his eyes flashed, his voice low and steady. "Xiviyah, have you forgotten what I told you? I promised I’d follow you wherever you went-into fire, ice, or the jaws of hell itself. I knew, even then, much of what you’ve told me, and could have guessed the rest. Even had I known it all, my answer wouldn’t have changed. Whether it be peace or war, freedom or chains, I won’t abandon you now."
"Fyren..." Tears welled up in my eyes, obscuring my vision. Sniffing, I scrubbed my sleeve across my face, but the soft trickle down my cheeks continued. "I’m sorry," I whispered, embarrassed, and buried my head in my arms on the table. I wasn’t supposed to cry anymore!
I flinched, taking a short breath, as his hand fell softly on my head, stroking the tangled curls of my hair behind my ears. "Why?" I sobbed, unable to so much as peek between my forearms at his face.
"It’s okay to cry," he said gently.
At his urging, I stop trying to fight it. Everything I’d suffered, all the stress, peace, and pain, flowed out in an endless stream of tears. The agony of the solitude and fear of abandonment wrenched at my heart, slowly draining with each tremble of my exhausted body.