Chapter 126: Full of longing...
After the funeral and incineration ceremony, Kai led Ren back to their chambers in silence. She tried to lighten his mood by sharing what she had uncovered in the tower, her voice gentle and sweet as always, a quiet effort to anchor him and ease his rigidness.
But Kai was unraveling, weighed down by the ghosts of the past and the uncertainty ahead. He was sick of the sorrow, of everything that hurt. All he wanted now was for them to stop surviving, and start living for each other, to embrace and kiss her for the rest of his life.
He raked a hand through his hair and bent forward, resting his forehead against her shoulder. His voice came out low and cracked. "Can we just stop it?"
Ren slipped her arms around him, holding him close. "Are you exhausted? Do you need something?"
He slowly pulled back, his gaze locking with hers. His eyes, dark and glassy, held a storm of unspoken words, a thousand things he couldn’t yet say, a thousand more he longed to do.
"Reneira."
Oh, good gods. The sound of her name on his lips made her heart tumble in her chest. Every time he said it like that, it left her breathless. She waited, barely breathing, for him to go on.
"I need you," he whispered. "I want to hear your heartbeat, feel your skin against mine. I don’t want anything else. I just want us... together." His eyes were full of need and lust, a buried hunger.
His breath grazed her jawline, voice trembling. "I’m sick of Lillieth and Nimoieth’s twisted nasty story. I hate that it haunts us. All I want is for you to know how deeply I love you. But I failed to protect you... and I can’t forgive myself for that. I hate what I let happen."