Chapter 135: Love is a weakness
Ryder quietly dressed himself, buttoning up his shirt and fastening his belt. He didn’t meet Noah’s eyes after that question, avoiding the soft gaze that followed his every action. His work was done. He has Ash’s address.
Noah, still lying in bed, watched him with growing confusion. The excitement that had filled his chest just moments ago was beginning to dissipate, replaced by a gnawing unease.
"Ryder, where are you going?" Noah asked softly, sitting up, his voice trembling slightly.
Ryder didn’t answer immediately, simply grabbing his jacket. Noah frowned, slipping out of bed and quickly following him, his bare feet padding softly against the floor. He reached out, gently catching Ryder’s arm.
"Wait...you’re leaving already?" he asked, a hint of desperation in his tone. "I thought...I thought you’d stay tonight."
Ryder paused, his back still to Noah. He took a breath, but didn’t turn around. "I have something to do," he said, his voice flat, as if it were the most normal thing in the world.
Noah blinked, confusion deepening. "But..." His voice faltered, and he took a step closer. "You said you’d give me an answer. About...us."
Ryder stayed silent, his hand gripping the doorknob as if contemplating whether or not to walk out right then. Noah’s heart began to race. Something wasn’t right. He could feel it—an icy knot of dread forming in the pit of his stomach.
"Ryder," Noah called, his voice firmer now. He reached out and pressed his hand to Ryder’s chest, halting him. His delicate fingers trembled slightly as they rested against the fabric of Ryder’s shirt. "You can’t just leave without answering me."
Ryder finally turned, his eyes meeting Noah’s. He looked down at the man standing before him—the way Noah’s soft, honey-brown eyes were filled with uncertainty, his bottom lip caught between his teeth, and his smooth skin flushed from their earlier intimacy. Noah’s beauty had always been effortless, a fragile kind of innocence that Ryder found both endearing and frustrating. He could see the fear in Noah’s eyes now, the kind that made Ryder feel like the worst kind of bastard.
For a long moment, Ryder just stared at him. He could feel Noah’s heart pounding beneath his hand, and for a brief second, he considered walking out without saying anything, sparing them both the conversation that was about to unfold. But he couldn’t leave it hanging like this. He had to tell him.