I Can Easily Defeat SSS Ranks... This World Is Already Mine

I, Ragnar Vhagar, the Vampire Lord of Aethelburg, the Tyrant of the North, the Scourge of Annoying Crystal Queens, was existentially, soul-crushingly bored.

My entire afterlife had been a frantic, exhilarating scramble for survival and conquest.

Now, with my rivals either dead, absorbed, or cowering in their basements, a profound and terrible quiet had descended upon my kingdom.

"This is unacceptable," I announced to the Crystal Spire’s throne room.

My voice, now a smooth baritone that was excellent for brooding monologues, echoed pleasingly off the walls.

"My bloodlust has dwindled to a mild sanguinary curiosity.

I almost complemented a goblin on his choice of skull-based centerpiece yesterday. This cannot stand."

Pixia, my tiny, flying spreadsheet, zipped over to my shoulder.

"My Lord, may I suggest this is a perfect time for you to engage in some personal growth?

A new hobby, perhaps? I have several manuals on macramé and the historical significance of artisanal cheese-making."

I gave her a look so cold that her tiny glasses frosted over for a second.