Chapter 159: Drunken Chaos
“Oi… Ryuko! Get me that thing!” Manna-san barked orders like she was a pirate captain on a sinking ship.
“Hey… help me, hikk… my cat was sick….” Aki wailed dramatically while clinging to my arm like a child being abandoned at daycare. Tears, hiccups, and all.
Sigh. It was absolute chaos. Bottles everywhere, Manna-san pointing at nothing, Aki crying into my sleeve, and Keiko—my poor Keiko—already dozing off with her cheek squished against the table.
Doomed. I was doomed.
---
One hour earlier…
“Hey, we must drink these!” Aki announced proudly, holding up bottles of alcohol like she had just discovered a legendary treasure.
“Oh, nice timing, Aki!” Manna, cheered.
And just like that, the trap was set. Everyone got dragged in. Everyone—except Suzuka.
“No, no, no, no!” Keiko practically turned into Suzuka’s bodyguard, batting away bottles like she was protecting royalty. “Juice only. Or cola. Nothing else touches her lips tonight.”
Suzuka nodded politely, clutching her orange juice like it was a lifeline.
For the first ten minutes, things were fine. The conversation was normal, the drinks flowed, and laughter filled the air.
Then it happened.
“MC Aki is back!” Aki yelled, suddenly holding a mic like she was hosting a chaotic variety show. “It’s boring to just sit and drink like this, right?”
Manna, Suzuka, and Miko all cheered.
“I knew it, guys! That’s why—” Aki’s hiccup cut her off, “—we’ll play a game! If you lose, you drink! Woooo!”
She sounded drunk already.
Manna, Suzuka, and Miko cheered again.
Ruka just smiled softly, still avoiding alcohol because she was breastfeeding.
“Don’t worry, Ruka and Suzuka get safe drinks,” Aki winked as if she was being thoughtful.
Yeah. Thoughtful. Right.
That was how the nightmare started.
---
I scanned the room desperately, trying to find someone sane. Surely Ruka was still okay.
I glanced at her—yep, she looked a little confused, like she had no idea how she ended up in this circus.
And Suzuka… oh, poor Suzuka. She looked terrified, like this was the first time she’d ever seen adults drunk in real life.
As I was plotting an escape route, someone suddenly blew into my ear.
Pffffffft!
“Wha—!” I jumped like a startled cat, nearly tripping over an empty can.
Manna-san’s face was right next to mine, eyes half-lidded, grin wide.
“You… pretty cute, huh…” she slurred.
I nearly died on the spot. My face burned red. Before I could respond, she collapsed—face-first into my lap.
“Great…” I muttered, heart hammering. I adjusted her so she wasn’t bent like a pretzel, sighing in defeat.
Ruka came over. “It’s already past twelve. The trains aren’t running anymore.”
“Yeah,” I nodded, resigned. “Guess we’re stuck here.”
Ruka agreed. “And… it’s not safe to leave them like this either.”
“True. Let’s at least make sure they don’t break their necks while they sleep.”
Ruka nodded. Suzuka nodded too, though she looked like she was on the verge of tears.
“Ruka, did you tell Junpei yet?” I asked.
She nodded. “I texted him.” She sighed, looking tired.
I scratched my head. “Sorry. This mess is kind of because of my party…”
She shook her head. “No, no. It’s fine, Ryuko.” She even smiled. “It’s not your fault.”
That smile helped. Just a little.
“Okay then… let’s move them.”
---
The plan was simple. I’d carry Keiko, Ruka would handle Miko, and Suzuka would… somehow drag Aki.
Ruka was strong—she scooped Miko up like it was nothing.
Meanwhile, Suzuka was struggling. Badly.
“Uuuugh! She’s… reallyyyyy heavy!” Suzuka groaned, red in the face, pulling at Aki’s leg like she was trying to drag a dead body. She switched to Aki’s arms, then back to her legs, then gave up completely.
I tried not to laugh while carrying Keiko, who was surprisingly heavy herself.
“Let me help you,” Ruka offered.
But before she could, Aki suddenly groaned.
“Oooooohhhhhh!”
Ruka and Suzuka froze. Suzuka even jumped back like she saw a ghost.
“It’s hot! Omg!” Aki wailed. Then she actually started unbuttoning her shirt.
Suzuka panicked instantly. “Wh-what are you doing?!”
“Hey, Suzuka…” Aki leaned dangerously close, eyes unfocused. “Help me take it off…”
Suzuka froze. Absolutely paralyzed. Face redder than a tomato. Poor girl looked like she was about to faint.
Meanwhile, I carefully set Keiko down on the sofa, trying not to laugh at the chaos unraveling behind me.
That was when Ruka stepped in.
“Ehh, Ruka, what are you doing? Let me—”
SLAP!
The sound echoed like a gunshot.
I froze. Suzuka froze. The whole room froze.
Even Keiko stirred a little.
Ruka’s hand lingered in the air, her face twisted between shock and regret. Aki, meanwhile, blinked slowly, holding her cheek.
“Uuuuugh…” she groaned, before collapsing back into a half-asleep heap.
I sighed, stepping in quickly. “Ruka… just rest for now. You can take the sofabed in the staff room.”
She looked shaken. “Sorry… I didn’t mean—”
“You can apologize to Aki tomorrow,” I reassured her with a smile.
She nodded and quietly left.
---
I helped Aki onto the floor, adjusting her so she wouldn’t wake up with a broken neck. Suzuka finally sat down too, curling up nervously on the floor.
“Just… rest, Suzuka. It’s okay.”
She nodded, still pale.
Finally, I sat back down on the sofa. Keiko’s head lolled against my shoulder. I took her hand gently, sighing at the utter disaster around me—bottles everywhere, half the group snoring, Aki stripped halfway out of her shirt with a red mark on her cheek, Manna still mumbling nonsense in her sleep.
I looked down at Keiko, smiled softly, and pressed a small peck to her forehead.
“Goodnight, love,” I whispered.
Somehow, despite the chaos, despite the insanity, it felt… oddly peaceful.
The last thing I heard before drifting off was Suzuka whispering to herself:
“…Never again. I’m never drinking. Ever.”