Chapter 34: There’s always a flag inside an event like this
Do you know what’s one of the most satisfying things in the world?
It was when our imagination and expectation were met.
I used to lower my expectation about anything. Or rather, having no expectations at all. After all, we wouldn’t be disappointed that way. I wasn’t disappointed about never visiting an amusement park, and never disappointed about being unable to live long.
Because I never expected myself to live long anyway.
Ah, but how could I not have any expectations when Zia gushed out story after story about the festivals she experienced in the past? She filled my head with colorful’s ornaments, various night markets filled with tasty foods and trinkets from all over the world, stage plays, costume parades, assortments of performances, music, and even fireworks.
Yeah, how could I have no expectations hearing about them along the journey?
But oh, what a sweet sweet thing it was, when my poor imagination came alive in front of me the moment we entered the port city of L’anak Sor. All of the things Zia boasted were true, and my senses were flooded with different things all at once that I felt overwhelmed.
Even only through the carriage’s window, I could see the colorful garlands and banners, ribbons and balloons being distributed by demons in costumes, papier-mâché decorations and topiaries, all adorning the street leading into our accommodation—one of Natha’s secret townhouses.
I didn’t even realize I was fidgeting impatiently until Natha put his hand on my knee, and tapped it lightly. Ugh...it was quite embarrassing to be so excited about a festival as an adult. But my soul, which never experienced such a thing before, craved it so strongly.
Just like how it craved affection, which I slowly realized.
It was the result of being greedy—greed for life, to live while enjoying everything that life could give. With that greed came expectation, hope, and fear.