Chapter 156: Asking Them Out Directly
Is it hard to find a partner if you’re short?
The answer is yes.
In "tall, rich, and handsome," "tall" comes first. That’s because it’s the most attainable of the three, but for that very reason, it’s also the most common requirement from women.
There’s 100% height discrimination in the matchmaking market. Zhang Zhe was sure of it. If he were 1.8 meters tall, he would’ve successfully found a match long ago back in Shencheng City.
Several girls his friends had set him up with had explicitly rejected him after learning his height, saying they wanted to find someone taller to "improve the gene pool."
The craziest part was: no matter how tall a girl was, she wanted a tall guy.
A girl who was 153cm once told Zhang Zhe straight up:
"I’ve been short my whole life and got bullied for it a lot in school. If my future kid ends up like me, they’ll probably go through the same thing."
"So I have to find a husband who’s 1.8 meters tall."
There were just too many women in the dating scene who thought like that.
For a guy like him, at 163cm tall, it would’ve been perfectly reasonable to look for a girl around 155cm. But the reality was, the minimum height requirement for those girls was 1.7 meters.
"Height is definitely a major handicap," Zhang Zhe nodded, partially agreeing with the man. "Have you ever been in a relationship before, man?"
"Nope. I’ve had a few crushes, but I’ve been single since birth."
"Haven’t your coworkers or classmates ever set you up with anyone?"
"A coworker set me up with someone once, but she was way out of my league. I just didn’t feel like I was good enough for her." The man was very honest. "So we talked a little, and then it just fizzled out."
"Yeah, I get it." Zhang Zhe nodded. The more life experience you have, the clearer your understanding of yourself becomes.
A mature man can clearly sense his own limits.
It’s like a limiter.
You can break through it, but not everyone can. Even if you try, the chances are slim.
When it comes to love, marriage, and friendships, this manifests as that ’I’m not worthy’ feeling.
"That’s it? Just the one?"
"When I went home for the New Year, my family set me up with two others. I actually chatted with one of them for a pretty long time. But then I found out she had just lived with her ex-boyfriend for three years and they’d only broken up three months ago. After I heard that... well, I just couldn’t get over it."
"So I didn’t pursue it."
[Living together for three years? Just treat her as divorced at that point.]
[That girl’s pretty honest, though, telling a guy she’s on a date with about her cohabitation history.]
[The guy is an honest man, so naturally the girl wouldn’t lead him on.]
[Bro, you don’t have some kind of hang-up about her past, do you? That’s gonna make it tough to find someone.]
"So what kind of person are you looking for?" Zhang Zhe continued.
"I’ve thought about it. Given my situation, I probably need to find someone from outside the city proper. She’d need to have a strong desire to stay in Qing City; that way, my house would become an advantage."
"As for looks, average is fine. But she can’t have too many family burdens. She can’t be the type who expects me to support her entire family."
"I don’t have any requirements for her job, as long as it’s stable and she has a normal income."
"There should be plenty of women like that at the matchmaking corner, right?" Zhang Zhe gestured toward the profile cards. "Haven’t you tried contacting any of them?"
"No." The man shook his head. "A lot of them are either older than me or have height requirements. There are very few who are actually a good fit."
"’Few’ still means ’some.’" Zhang Zhe had already completely pinpointed the man’s problem.
’When there’s a suitable option, he gets timid.’
’When they’re not a good fit, he gives up immediately.’
’With a timid personality like this, he wouldn’t even get his turn to be hit by a truck and sent to another world.’
"Man, do you know what kind of vibe you give off right now?"
"What vibe?" the man asked curiously.
"You just give off this... unassertive vibe," Zhang Zhe told the man bluntly. "It’s like, you stand there, give a sheepish smile, and women just see you as a boring, harmless guy. They don’t want to have anything to do with you."
"To put it bluntly, you have no sex appeal."
"If a short guy wants to date, he has to have some kind of appeal. Otherwise, your only option is to brute-force it with money. You’d have to be driving a Maserati or a Land Rover, or at the very least a BMW, Benz, or Audi."
"Do you get what I’m saying?"
"Sort of," the man nodded.
"’Sort of’ isn’t good enough. Let me give you another example."
Zhang Zhe looked him in the eye. "Do you like checking out busty women?"
"I do, but what does that have to do with finding a date?"
"Nothing, just curious," Zhang Zhe said with a smile. "Now, imagine a busty girl wearing a baggy black t-shirt and flip-flops. She’s got straight bangs, she’s slouching, and she’s walking down the street munching on a corn on the cob. Do you find her attractive?"
"No, she sounds like a frumpy middle-aged lady."
"But what if she were in a Nakaimo cosplay?"
[Then I’d be ready for liftoff.]
[Brother Zhang gets it. He must be a master of the five-knuckle shuffle himself.]
[If this guy dresses like this every day, it’s true no girl would look at him. He looks 40.]
[Actually, a lot of the thirst-trap girls on TikTok are just like Brother Zhang described in real life. They just know how to turn it on for the camera.]
"If she were cosplaying... yeah, that would be very attractive." The man understood. He looked down at his own clothes and couldn’t help but sigh.
"Dressed like this, I really can’t date."
"Is it too late to start working out?"
"Of course it’ll help. If you can flash a six-pack at a moment’s notice, I can guarantee you’ll at least have a chance to talk to women your age at the gym."
"Remember this, man: dating is a competition against other guys. The more good qualities you have, the bigger your advantage."
"Having abs makes you look energetic. That’s definitely more attractive than being short and chubby and looking like your job has sucked the life out of you."
"However, that’s not the most urgent problem you need to solve."
Zhang Zhe’s tone shifted. He just wanted the man to understand why he was having such a hard time finding a partner.
’A nice guy who seems boring is at the absolute bottom of the dating market. He can only rely on money to get by. And even if a man like that gets married, he’ll face other risks.’
Baoqiang is a perfect example.
"The problem you need to solve right now is changing your whole approach to dating."
"But before we get to that, I need to confirm something with you."
Zhang Zhe stared him in the eyes.
"Do you absolutely have to get married? Is being single completely unacceptable?"
"I definitely have to get married," the man said, meeting Zhang Zhe’s gaze without flinching, his tone utterly serious.
[Bro, you got a throne to inherit or something?]
[Everyone’s upbringing is different, no need to mock him, right?]
[If you ask me, now’s a great time to get married. Your kid will have less competition in the future, just a few million kids in their age group.]
[Dude, you have to have a bunch of kids. My future pension depends on your son’s contributions.]
[When we’re old, and I have a son but you don’t, you’ll learn the hard way just how many eyes Lord Ma has.]
"Okay, then let’s continue."
"Let me ask you something. Why did you stop talking to that girl who was ’out of your league’? Did she charge you to chat with her?"
"That’s not it. I just felt like there was no point," the man answered without a second thought.
"You’re right, chatting is pointless. I bet after just a few sentences, she’d figure out you’re a boring guy," Zhang Zhe advised. "Next time you meet someone like that, text less and just ask her out to eat."