Chapter 56: You’re Looking for Guys on This Platform?
[Teacher Zhang, don’t hold back. You’re being too gentle.]
[Are you trying to be the next Luo Yonghao?]
[Crap, we’ve broken another Matchmaker.]
[Host, your behavior constitutes violence. Please cease and desist immediately.]
[Hahaha, I feel so bad for the host.]
Zhang Zhe had thought he was immune to these kinds of characters.
But once she actually appeared, he realized he had spoken too soon. ’My bad. Turns out I just hadn’t met someone *truly* next-level yet.’
From the sound of it, this woman wasn’t very bright.
The second half of what she said was right. A9s these days all know how to protect their assets before marriage. Can’t be helped—they’re terrified of getting cleaned out.
Too many people wanted to hit the jackpot by getting married. She was late to the party; the "stupidity tax" had already been paid by her predecessors for the next ninety years.
The only people Zhang Zhe had seen online getting their money taken by their wives in recent years were either retired pro LoL players or influencers who’d suddenly gone viral. It was rare to see anyone with a legitimate business get cleaned out anymore.
’It’s a tough market out there.’
No wonder this woman was so bent out of shape.
But the first part of her statement made no sense. ’One of the most important ways of spreading education is through sex and bloodlines.’ He could only conclude that she lacked both the intelligence and the emotional quotient to be a campus siren; you couldn’t really blame the highly educated for not ’spreading’ it to her.
As far as Zhang Zhe knew, the men in those circles were actually quite happy to "spread" it around.
Of course, Zhang Zhe wasn’t going to correct the woman.
’Otherwise, who would buy snake oil?’
He composed himself. "Mm, go on."
"What is it that made you lose interest in marriage? Have you been divorced nine times and achieved nirvana or something?"
"I’ve never been married," the woman explained. "But I have been on a lot of blind dates."
[What a load of crap. Turns out she just can’t find a sucker.]
[I failed over 30 blind dates and just got married last month. Don’t be so pessimistic.]
["Can’t see the forest for the trees." This describes her perfectly.]
"How many times?"
"Fourteen or fifteen, I guess."
"In-person dates?"
"Yes, I met all of them in person."
"How did you meet them? Through a matchmaker?" Zhang Zhe pressed.
He was digging so deep because he suddenly remembered what Boss He had told him: the most common type of client at matchmaking agencies are single women looking to marry up.
These agencies charge a fee for every one-on-one introduction they arrange.
It’s not uncommon for women to pay for a dozen or more introductions.
Zhang Zhe had already seen how lucrative livestream matchmaking could be, so he was now a little curious about how traditional matchmaking agencies operated.
But he’d picked the wrong person to ask.
Zhang Zhe had assumed the woman had despaired after spending a fortune on countless unsuccessful dates.
He never expected her to answer:
"I mostly meet guys on my own through the Xiaohongshu platform. We always meet online first, chat for a while, and then meet in person..."
[Meeting guys on Xiaohongshu... what a niche concept.]
[Why don’t you try finding dates on a forum, then?]
[That explanation tracks. It’s exactly what I imagined.]
Hearing that she found her dates herself on Xiaohongshu, Zhang Zhe instantly felt a sense of relief. The wrinkles in his brain smoothed out, and he felt as if he were strolling through a Norwegian wood.
’The right person, the right platform—it all made perfect sense!’
"I stream on Xiaohongshu too," Zhang Zhe said with a smile. "There aren’t many guys on there."
"Actually, there are quite a lot." The woman’s reply was so fast it was almost frightening. He couldn’t tell if she was genuinely clueless or just had a contrarian personality.
"A lot of guys looking for dates?"
"Tons. And I wasn’t even looking that hard."
"Alright, so let’s round down and say fourteen dates. What were the guys from those fourteen dates like?"
"Most of them were A9s," the woman said casually.
"Some of them worked at big tech firms, one had his bachelor’s, master’s, and doctorate from Tsinghua, and a few were rich second-generation kids..."
"You don’t need to elaborate," Zhang Zhe cut her off. He had no interest in these fabricated identities; they were most likely made up by the guys themselves.
He didn’t even want to continue with this matchmaking session.
Forget about Happiness Points; right now, he just wanted to dig up some interesting dirt.
"I’m curious now. Out of all of them, which one was the best? The one you were most satisfied with? How good was he? Tell me about him."
Zhang Zhe was certain that the one she was most satisfied with would be the one with the best qualifications.
"I was just getting to that."
"Those guys I mentioned earlier... they were outstanding, but I couldn’t muster much interest in any of them. I just couldn’t bring myself to like them."
"The only one I was interested in had parents who were high-ranking government officials. He had a great job himself, was pretty handsome, and was over 1.85 meters tall. But we only met twice before he ghosted me."
[He met you twice? Wow, that guy has some class.]
[His parents are high-ranking officials, and their son is on Xiaohongshu looking for you? You must mean officials of the *living room*.]
[This woman is still dreaming.]
[The crazy part is, she says it like it’s true.]
The chat was debating whether the woman was telling the truth.
Zhang Zhe was inclined to believe that, from her perspective, it was true.
In reality, though, it was likely a scammer who had fabricated his background and was using the pretense of dating on Xiaohongshu to find targets—either to scam them for money or just to mess around.
In any case, the woman had fallen for it.
They met twice, and the guy realized there was nothing worth scamming her for, so he simply gave up on the target.
’So, this woman is not only poor, but ugly too.’
’If she’d had either money or looks, the guy wouldn’t have stopped after just two dates. He wouldn’t have let go until he’d picked her clean.’
"But, Brother Zhang, even though I was interested in him, I didn’t actually like him as a person. I just liked his qualifications."
"If he had been willing to marry me, I would have just... accepted it."
"He would never be willing to marry you!" Zhang Zhe interrupted bluntly.
’She ran into a scammer and still had the nerve to be picky. No wonder even the scammer didn’t want to deal with her.’
"Mhm, I know. There’s definitely a gap in our qualifications."
"And what are your qualifications?" Zhang Zhe retorted.
"I was born in ’99, I have a master’s degree, I work at a central state-owned enterprise, and my family’s assets are around A8..."
The qualifications she described made her sound like a pampered only daughter from a wealthy coastal province.
But the system didn’t think so.
[High-Value Intelligence]
[Your matchmaking target, Bai Fang: Her family used to be A8, but her father’s business went bankrupt, and they are now in debt.
She is now desperate to find someone to marry to give her family a helping hand. However, the men she meets on Xiaohongshu are all scammers. Fortunately, she has no money to lose and is rather sturdy-looking, so she hasn’t suffered any major losses.
Her current perception of marriage is completely warped, making her absolutely unsuitable for it.]
"Brother Zhang, what areas do you think I should work on improving?"
"I feel like there’s something wrong with my mindset."
"Are you really asking for my opinion?" Zhang Zhe asked. "If I give you a suggestion, you’re not going to put me on blast on Xiaohongshu, are you?"
[Hahaha, you’re definitely getting put on blast.]
[Depends on whether she likes what she hears. If not, you’re dead meat.]
[If you find her an A10, she definitely won’t blast you.]
[First time I’ve realized the host has it tough, too.]
"No, no, of course not. I’ve never put anyone on blast on Xiaohongshu."
"Brother Zhang, don’t worry. You can even record me saying it."
"Alright, then I’ll give you some real advice. Uninstall Xiaohongshu. And while you’re at it, uninstall those web novel apps too," Zhang Zhe said with utmost sincerity. "You should go hang out at the matchmaking corners in the park. Go chat with the grandpas and grandmas there about life."