Chapter 63 – Cheering Up a Friend
Mental breakdown.
Jade had always considered herself a positive mind, but like many others, she had experienced moments of mental breakdown too.
One time, it happened back when she had poor results in school. It lasted for days, yet none of her relatives noticed. The entire family was already weighed down by a financial crisis, and her breakdown was quiet, subtle enough to affect no one but herself. In the end, they all overcame the hardship, and that incident became one of the reasons she resolved to become a pastry chef.
Another time happened during her days at the pastry institute. She had been assigned to a small, mock-business group project: form a team, bake products, sell them, and earn good reviews. Those results would determine their final grade.
The group had been a disaster.
One member was too busy being lovey-dovey with her boyfriend and kept skipping every group session. Another was so clumsy he could barely manage basic tasks. Jade had requested to switch groups or work alone, but the lecturer refused. In the end, she had no choice but to carry the entire project herself.
When the clumsy member bought the wrong type of flour and wasted half their budget, and the love-struck member showed up in tears because her boyfriend had dumped her, Jade finally snapped.
That breakdown was anything but quiet.
Jade shouted, scolded, and practically threatened them – warning that if they ever caused her to fail the class and forced her to pay for a retake, she would make sure to do something about them… Whether it was her expression or simply the situation – Jade cared very little about what was going through their minds at that moment – they finally followed her orders to the letter. Jade, together with the other two, ended up acing the class with flying colours.
Jade knew what a mental breakdown felt like.
And this time, she had caught it early. As she examined her own thoughts, she realised she had been standing right at the edge. But Father Rochester had been one step ahead, pulling her back before she tipped over. Because of that, she could still remain calm now. If not for him, she might have broken into tears, and perhaps spiralled into a prolonged slump, unable to teach or even function properly…
Jade did not return to her room immediately after leaving the chief clergy’s study. Instead, she went back to the classroom, informed Clara that she would be taking a day off, and half an hour later, Mother Annie arrived to take over her duties.
The stern old nun gave Jade a disapproving look before shooing her out of the classroom. “Go on, go on, read some Lumen Codex in the main hall, take a walk outside. I do not want to hear news of you in the kitchen or the bakehouse, understand?”
“Yes, Mother Annie.” Jade gave the respectable nun a slight bow and left obediently.
She changed into thicker clothing and stepped out onto the village path.
She took a deep breath–
Or maybe not.
The sudden rush of cold air, mixed with the smell of horse dung and a trace of coal smoke, did her lungs no favours. Jade quickly pulled up her facemask and continued walking, observing the winter scenery around the domus.
Honestly, she hadn’t wandered aimlessly like this in the neighbourhood since arriving in this world.
Her nerves had been tight from the very first day.
At first, she had worried about being driven out of the domus. So she became a teacher, trading her labour for a place to stay. Father Rochester likely would not have turned her away so long as she caused no trouble, but Jade had been deeply impressed by the clergy’s charitable spirit.
Then she worried about the students’ safety, so she created additional work opportunities for them.
After that came concerns about the school’s finances. One could not rely on donations alone – who knew when the wealthy might lose interest or redirect their generosity elsewhere? And so, more projects followed.
Soon, her worries extended to the students’ future. She began teaching every skill she believed might be useful – yet she lacked confidence, uncertain whether what she taught was truly correct.
And now, she worried she might fail to prepare cakes for an event, fearing that any imperfection would damage the reputation of the domus and the school. The thought of losing her ability to serve such an occasion, simply because she had not done so for a long time, unsettled her. Yet at the same time, she was reluctant to let go of the opportunity to elevate their name…
Huh. Never realised my nerves were this tense. Jade mused as she stood beneath a leafless tree, gazing at the shimmering river nearby. Guess it’s because I never gave myself any me-time.
“Feeling a touch of Winter Blues?”
A familiar voice suddenly sounded from behind her. Jade gasped, jolted, and turned to find Ashborne grinning.
She shot him a glare and let out a heavy sigh, patted her chest to steady her racing heart. “You could’ve signaled me first before you said anything.”
Ashborne glanced down at his boots and the trail of footprints that had clearly crushed some branches beneath the greyish snow, wisely choosing not to argue with an irritated lady. He yielded and said, “My apologies, Jade. I shall take care not to startle you next time.”
“Nah, I’m just being grumpy,” Jade said, turning back to the river. Now she could hear the sound of boots stepping into squishy snow, the soft crunch stopping just an arm’s length away.
“Then your grumpiness is rather mild, compared to what I had witnessed before,” She heard him chuckle lightly.
A peaceful silence followed his words.
It was rare. He was usually quite talkative. But the quiet between them felt natural.
The sky was dull, and the shimmer on the water seemed muted, as though the entire world Jade now lived in were veiled by a grey filter… Oh, right. The smog from industrialisation, worsened by the cold weather. One of the reasons she had decided to stay indoors for the entire winter.
Only now did Jade fully realise that she might never again enjoy abundant sunlight – not for the rest of her life, unless she became rich enough to migrate to a country near the equator. She found herself missing the hot, blazing days of her previous life, when she would complain endlessly and crank the fan up to its highest setting. Air-con had never been an option as her electricity bill would have been unbearable. No way was she spending money on that when she could still endure the heat!
“Maybe the Winter Blues do make some sense,” Jade murmured. “Lack of sunshine does make people gloomy, and it’s not something a fireplace can help.”
“I would be most pleased to invite the esteemed schoolmistress, Miss Jade Lysmere, to spend some time at my estate in Brightfield,” Ashborne said, following her line of thought. “By the seaside, with ample sunshine. Quite effective at dispelling such gloom.”
“As if I have the budget and time for a vacation,” Jade scoffed.
“My dear Miss Jade, it is an invitation,” Ashborne replied, his gaze following her across the river. “All you need to do is accept, and allow Trent and my servants to handle the rest.”
Jade turned to him, raising a brow. “You’re serious?”
Ashborne returned the look. “I see no reason not to be. It is merely a matter of arranging the journey. Within a few days, we could be settled at the estate.”
“Don’t you need to apply for leave or something… oh, right, I forgot, you don’t work,” Jade said, rolling her eyes at herself more than at him. She had momentarily forgotten that rich people could live off their inheritance, just as they did in her previous life. Noticing his curious look, she let out a small sigh. “Nothing. You’re doing great; nothing’s wrong with you. I’m just babbling nonsense, trying to clear the noise from my brain.”
Ashborne studied the young woman beside him. Even with half her face covered by a mask, her eyes, brows, and voice still conveyed her thoughts vividly.
Of all the people he had known, Jade was the most unpredictable. Her thoughts often wandered in oddly endearing directions – strange, amusing, and entirely her own – whenever she was comfortable with the people around her. And though he would not admit it aloud, Ashborne found himself quite pleased to be included within her circle of ease.
She treated him as an equal – simply a friend – and not as an aristocrat to be admired for marriage or pursued for his fortune.
And as a friend, he had intended to cheer her up after hearing of her near breakdown from his secretary. However, it seemed a seaside holiday was not the solution.
He paused for a moment before breaking the silence again. “Perhaps some good news might brighten your day?”
“What good news?” Not like I can go back to my already-dead body anyway. Jade narrowed her eyes, clearly uninterested.
“Do you recall the air filter you mentioned a couple of months ago?” Ashborne, unaware of her thoughts but noting her lack of enthusiasm, chose a topic he believed would interest her.
Jade had been preoccupied with too many things over the winter. It took her a moment – then her eyes widened. “Air filter? The kind that takes dirty smoke out of chimneys?”
“Yes, indeed!” Ashborne puffed up with pride. “I have consulted several engineers and men of science, and they have developed a plausible prototype for both household chimneys and factory emissions. I may not have worked alongside them directly, but I have certainly contributed.”
Jade brightened slightly. “Good news indeed! Though it’ll probably take another decade before it’s actually implemented across society. But yeah, good news! History might remember your name!”
Ashborne had been pleased to see her eyes relax, but her words made him pause. “Another decade?”
“Yeah. Another decade, if everything goes smoothly.” Jade tightened the scarf around her neck. “Politicians will need to pass regulations, right? And factories are definitely going to oppose installing something new – that’s extra cost, and those money-grubbers don’t like extra cost. Same for ordinary people. If they don’t see immediate benefits, they won’t bother because it’s just another expense. And the poor? They won’t even consider it. They’re busy trying to feed themselves, and they definitely don’t have the luxury to worry about lung diseases or anything like that. Between having a full stomach and dying miserably of lung disease ten years later, they would no doubt choose a full stomach.”
“...I see.” Ashborne lowered his head slightly, deflated. Still, he was unwilling to abandon the idea. “Is there nothing we can do to accelerate its adoption?”
“Well, raise awareness,” Jade said with a shrug. “You know – newspaper propaganda. Let people understand why it matters. People only act when they see benefits. Just be careful and make sure you don’t create a second cosmetic industry event. I can still see the intellectuals debating it in the newspapers. Guess the aftermath of that shockwave will last a very long time; not the best time to reveal another piece of groundbreaking research if you ask me. Hm, I wonder how much the government gets by fining those who don’t comply with the latest food and drug regulations…”
Ashborne fell silent, while Jade turned her attention back to the river.
Maybe I should do this more often, she thought. After staying here so long, I don’t even know what this parish looks like, or what kind of workshops are around…
“So… if I publish advertisements and hire journalists to write about it,” Ashborne’s voice broke the silence again, “would that help spread awareness?”
Jade turned to him, her expression a mixture of disbelief and astonishment, “...You’re still thinking about that? Milord, that’s none of your business. You’re not planning to be a politician or a scientist, are you?”
“No, but… I already have a plan…”
“No, you don’t.” Jade cut in immediately. “Having a prototype does not mean you have a plan, Ashborne.”
Her words did little to discourage him. “Even so, there must be something I can do. I have seen a possible way to clear our air; I cannot blind myself to unseening such a thing!”
“You?” Jade gave him a once-over and let out a faint, incredulous laugh. “No, no, you can’t do it. You don’t have the drive to stir something this big. Too many parties are involved. And you – without political power, without real influence, and without the determination to throw yourself into a messy, complicated storm – you won’t achieve anything except burning through your money. Remember how you barely escaped the cosmetic industry shockwave? Surely you still remember the lesson to not get yourself involved in another one?”
“I will be very careful this time.” Ashborne did not take offense. She was in a poor mood; politeness was not to be expected. And truthfully, he preferred her honesty over forced courtesy. Instead, his eyes lit up. “You do have a suggestion, Miss Jade.”
Jade leaned against the leafless tree. “Maybe. If you have the right connections. You’d need a very strong network, you know.”
“Well, fortunately,” Ashborne said with a grin, “I do.”