Time Apart
At the Blood Hound’s wagon I ask Mr. Martin, “Uhm, excuse me. I know it might be a little sudden and weird but would you mind if I stayed with your wagon for a few days?”
“Nope, that just makes our job easier. Just a heads up though, Cory farts like a cow and Daniel snores like a saw mill.”
“Okay…? Thank you for your hospitality.”
“You’re welcome, so how about that back light of yours?”
“Oh, uhm apparently it means I’m molting.”
“Huh…So you’re gonna shed your skin? I guess dragons are just big lizards after all. So, what brings you here? I doubt it’s just because you want to spend time with me and my sister.”
“I just needed some space from my own sisters…”
“Trouble in paradise, I see, I see. Well, feel free to make yourself at home here until we get this escort mission done.”
“Alright, thank you Mr. Martin.”
As I try to find a good place for my bedroll, Maria approaches me.
To diffuse the situation I say, “I don’t want to fight. I’ll be quiet and not do anything.”
She seems a bit upset. I wonder if I did something to offend her again.
“I’m sorry if I did anything wrong, like I said I don’t want any-”
“My deepest apologies!”
“Huh?”
“I have treated you extremely unfairly so far. I was blinded by my own false sense of righteousness and I ended up bullying you. I’m very sorry about that.”
“R-Really?”
“Yes…I have done horrible things to you. I know that it will be close to impossible for you to forgive me but I wanted to tell you that I am immensely sorry for what I have done and that I won’t do it again. I will also reflect on my actions to improve myself so I won’t make the same mistake again.”
“I…Uhm…Okay. So, you will stop being mean to me now?”
“Yes.”
“Alright. Thank you.”
“Are you…Not upset with me?”
“I am but you seem sincere. Manya always says to respect people that can admit they’re wrong. So if what you said is true I’ll forgive you.”
“I…Thank you so much, your Holiness.”
“What did you just call me?”
“Oh, I guess it’s not official yet, so I should wait.”
“Wait…Is the only reason you apologized because you think I’m a saintess?”
“It’s not the only reason but it did show me the error of my ways.”
“You haven’t learned anything at all, have you?”
“What?”
“You only apologize because you think I’m some holy figure. Not because you learned anything about not judging others!”
“I…I don’t think that’s quite-”
“It’s fine. Just ignore me, I’ll do the same for you.”
“I…As you wish…”
Completely ignoring her, I find a corner for me to stay in and set it up for the ride later.
Sher Aka then approaches me with a plate of food in hand, “Rose? Were you intending to skip lunch again?”
“I just didn’t want to run into any of you…”
“Oh? Even me?”
“Well…You probably think I’m a weird creep and I guess you’d be right.”
Sitting down next to me, Sher Aka offers me the plate of food, “I don’t think so at all. Isn’t it normal for you to want parents?”
“I guess, maybe…But not Scarlet and Rayla…”
“Say Rose, did Scarlet or Rayla tell you about imprinting yet?”
“No, what’s that?”
“It’s something all baby Dragons go through. Essentially, about once a year for the first twenty years or so of every Dragon’s life, they go through a phase called imprinting. During that time they get really tired and their noses get really sensitive taking in the smells of people close to them. Anyone they smell a lot during that phase will forever be seen as family by them. You had your first imprint shortly before you got to know Ser Ulian and you imprinted on Rayla and Scarlet which is why you think of them as your parents. It’s nothing weird and it’s not your fault.”
“What!? Really!? Are you sure you’re not just making that up?”
“Yes, I’m sure. We just didn’t tell you before because there isn’t really a way to stop an imprint so Scarlet and Rayla didn’t want to alarm you.”
“I…I see. So the weird feelings I have are because of that imprint?”
“Yes.”
“Then how do I get rid of it again? Is there a trick to that?”
“There is no way to get rid of it. It can’t be undone.”
“What…? So it- it will never go back to normal again?”
“It can. But you would have to imprint on another person that you would see as your parent.”
“So, I just need to imprint on Uli and it will be fine?”
“That will only work if you intend to live with Shara Seleen. If you stay far apart like this, even if you do imprint on her, you will just end up constantly missing her and the feelings you have for Rayla and Scarlet won’t go away either because you still spend most of your time with them. It needs to be a person that actually will spend a lot of time with you and that you want as your parent.”
“I see…So it’s hopeless…”
“It might not be.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well…Would you be opposed to imprinting on me?”
“What?”
“We already travel together and I have grown to like you a lot. I’d also not be opposed to taking on the role of a mother for you.”
“Wh-what!? I…Sher Aka, I’m flattered you’d do that for me but I don’t need a mother. Especially not you.”
“Oh? Why ‘especially’ not me?”
“B-because it’d be weird. I-I do like you and I like being with and around you but we-we’re not like parent and child. We’re friends.”
“That might be true for now but it doesn’t have to stay like that. I won’t force you into anything but I promise you if you choose me for your next imprint I will be a dutiful and loving mother to you.”
“Th-that…I…I don’t know what to say.”
“And that’s completely fine. You don’t have to decide right now. I won’t force you into anything either, you’re free to choose and I won’t feel bad if you decline. But I do want to give you the option to make that choice.”
“I…Okay? Sorry, I’m a bit confused by all of this.”
“It sure is a lot to take in…” Sher Aka says while brushing through my hair, “How about going through a trial run?”
“A trial run?”
“Yes, trying out what it would be like to be mother and daughter. We can start slow and stop wherever you are no longer comfortable.”
“Okay…I guess that makes sense.”
“Then how about for now, I give you a hug?”
“Just a hug?”
“Yep, just a hug.”
“Sure…That sounds okay…”
Sher Aka then gives me a warm hug. It feels nice and she doesn’t linger on it for long.
As she lets go of the hug she gives me a smile and says, “Make sure to eat your lunch,” before leaving me alone again.
A bit stumped by the whole event I eat my food, put on my mask and join the wagon of the Blood Hounds as we get moving again.
It seems the empty corner space I chose was right between Cory and Daniel's usual place but Cory isn’t sitting down for long because he has to steer the carriage with Martin. Maria also leaves early because she is the one driving the saintess’ carriage and the one with the scarf is nowhere to be seen. In the end I just end up sitting in the corner alone hugging my bedroll, thinking and waiting for time to pass.
After a while Susan asks, “Are you sure you’re okay with staying in the wagon? You look…Stressed.”
“Oh, uhm…No I’m fine, thank you.”
“And yet you’ve been hugging your bedroll for over an hour now, quietly swaying back and forth. You look like a recruit soldier that just barely survived their first battle.”
“It’s not that bad! I might be a little stressed but not that much.”
“You know our job is to protect you right? Demons feed off negative emotions. If you are in a bad mental state you’ll be easier to affect with demonic magic.”
“I’m fine! It’s not that bad!”
“Really? Then put down your bedroll, stop swaying for five minutes and I’ll believe you.”
“Sure, I can do that.”
Putting down my bedroll I try to calm down and just sit normally.
“You started swaying again.”
“Eh! Uhm, I was just readjusting…”
Pulling out a pocket watch she answers,“Sure…I’ll start the timer again, if it was just a misunderstanding surely it won’t happen twice.”
“Y-yeah, exactly.”
What am I doing? Why am I so stressed? It’s just been about two hours. I’ve been away from everyone for longer than that! Right…? Wait…When was the last time we were separated that long? Probably when we were at the guild last time…But even then we were still in the same room…Wait, when was the last time I was actually away from them for more than a few minutes? I…I don’t remember. Why do I not remember?
“Your teeth are chattering.”
“Uh- Uhm, probably because it’s chilly in here.”
“It’s a pretty warm day though and you’re well dressed.”
“I-it must be because we’re different races.”
“I see…Then a blanket will surely warm you up, won’t it?”
“Y-yeah.”
Putting a wool blanket made for winter over me she asks, “Surely it is warm enough now, right?”
“Y-yeah.”
“Good, I’ve reset the timer.”
I need to calm down. What the hell is wrong with me? It’s just five minutes, why can’t I be normal for five minutes? I know! I’ll just meditate, it will help! Yeah…Just breathe in and breathe out, just ignore everything el-
Whimper
“What was that?”
“No-nothing!”
“I see…Perhaps it was just a lost puppy on the road. But just to make sure, let’s restart the timer.”
“Th-there isn't really a need to restart the timer over a dog right?”
“I guess that’s right, as long as we don’t hear it again…”
Why did that sound so intimidating? Doe-does she know? I-I don’t think she knows. She’s staring right at me though.
Whimper
“...”
Did she not hear it that time?
“Sounds like the wagon wheels need oiling again…”
She totally did hear it! Is-Is she ignoring it or did she really think it was the wagon wheel?
“Oh, looks like five minutes are up!”
“Really!?”
Letting out a sigh of relief I lose concentration and start to shiver together with my teeth chattering.
“Nope, I lied. You barely lasted two minutes with cheating.”
“What? Then why-”
“Just look at yourself. You’re a complete mess.”
“I-I guess I am.”
“Then go back to your sisters, you obviously need to be around them.”
“N-no! Please. It’s just like with a drug addict. As long as I endure it it will eventually get better again!”
“The fact you’re comparing this to drug addiction is concerning enough. You’re going back the next time we have a break.”
“N-no! Please don’t! I don’t sob I don’t want to…Sob”
“Are you crying? Wait, are you shrinking too!? Martin! Stop the wagon! Something weird is going on!”