Vol-2 Chapter 12: Where are you?
Hania sat in the Academy's private study chamber, surrounded by scrolls, books, and an alarming number of spider anatomy diagrams. The orb floated beside her, pulsing with concern.
You've been reading for six hours straight.
"Hmm."
Your eyes are bleeding.
"They're not bleeding. They're just... tired."
They're bleeding. I can see the red veins from here. That's not normal.
Hania rubbed her eyes, wincing. "Fine. They're a little tired. But I need to understand spider mana channels before I can design a targeted infusion."
She looked down at the open book in front of her. The diagram showed a spider's spinneret in cross-section, with tiny arrows indicating mana flow. It looked like a knot of spaghetti that had been attacked by a confused artist.
"Who drew this?" she muttered. "A blind spider with a grudge against geometry?"
The Academy's illustration department. They're very proud of their work.
"They should be ashamed. This is incomprehensible."
Hania flipped through several more scrolls, her frustration mounting. The spider anatomy was fascinating, but the terminology was completely foreign. She had spent years studying human medicine in her past life. Bones, muscles, organs, circulatory systems. All of it made sense.
This was like learning medicine from scratch, except the patients had eight legs, extruded silk from their abdomen, and their "heart" was apparently a distributed network of mana nodes throughout their entire body.
"How is that even possible?" she demanded. "How can a 'heart' be everywhere at once? That's not a heart. That's a mana infestation."
I think it's more like a... collective consciousness?
"It's a nightmare, that's what it is."
Hania slammed the scroll shut and leaned back in her chair, staring at the ceiling.
Maybe you should take a break. You could have a muffin. I still have the extra one from the head baker.
"I don't want a muffin. I want to understand spider medicine."
You could try asking someone. Maybe the professor—
"She's waiting for me to fail. I'm not giving her the satisfaction."
Hania stood up and began pacing the room, her hands waving in frustration.
I was a medical student. I dissected cadavers. I held hearts in my hands. I studied for exams until I hallucinated. And now I can't even figure out how a spider's mana channels work?! Hania thought.
To be fair, spiders are very different from humans, the orb projected.
"Different is fine. I can handle different but this is not different. It's like the spider body was designed by a committee of chaos demons who hated anatomical consistency."
The orb pulsed with amusement.
You're very dramatic when you're tired.
"I'm not tired. I'm passionate."
You're exhausted. You've been awake for eighteen hours.
"I'm fine."
Your hair is sticking up in seventeen different directions.
"That's a fashion choice."
You're wearing two different socks.
Hania looked down. She was, in fact, wearing two different socks. One purple, one silver. She hadn't even noticed.
"...Fine. Maybe I'm a little tired."
A little. Also, you're talking to yourself, and to me. Out loud in front of the door.
Hania turned. A young spider student was standing in the doorway, holding a stack of scrolls, staring at her with wide eyes.
"Princess," the student squeaked. "I... I brought the additional anatomy references you requested. But if you're busy, I can—"
"No, no, come in. I'm not busy. I was just... having a passionate discussion with my orb."
The student's eyes flicked to the orb, then back to Hania. She set the scrolls down on the nearest table and backed away slowly.
"Thank you," Hania called after her. "Tell your friends I'm not crazy. I'm just... eccentric."
The student fled.
She's definitely telling her friends you're crazy.
Hania sighed and flopped back into her chair. She stared at the ceiling, her mind drifting to the one person she desperately needed to talk to.
Truck-kun.
He was still trapped in the cherry blossom tree in her father's garden. She had left him there, wedged between branches, his radiator smoking, his oil pan screaming. And she hadn't been able to go back for him. She didn't even know if the garden was still accessible, or if it had collapsed when her mother's portal had closed.
You're thinking about something, the orb observed.
"I'm thinking about a... friend. Someone who helped me. And I left him behind."
Where?
"In a place I can't reach anymore." Hania's voice was heavy. "I need to find a way back. But I don't know how."
Maybe you could—
"I've tried everything but nothing works."
Hania closed her eyes, frustration boiling in her chest. In the past, all she had to do was fall asleep. The dream domain would appear, and Truck-kun would be there. But now, when she tried to sleep, nothing happened. She just... slept. Normal, boring, unconscious sleep. No dream library. No Truck-kun.
She had tried everything. Meditation. Mana visualization. Teleportation spells. She had even tried to replicate the dimensional breach spell that had sent her to her father's garden. Nothing worked.
"Why won't it work?" she demanded, opening her eyes. "I've used dimensional magic before. I breached the garden. I crossed the void. Why can't I do it now?"
Maybe it's because you're trying too hard. Don't force it.
"I need to force it. I need to rescue him."
Him?
"...A friend. Someone who helped me find my way back to my father." Hania's voice cracked. "He's stuck somewhere, and I can't get to him. I don't even know if he's okay."
That's why you've been pushing yourself so hard.
"Yes."
The orb was quiet for a moment. Then it pulsed gently.
You're not going to find answers if you collapse from exhaustion. You need to rest.
"I'll rest when I find a way back."
Three Hours Later...
Hania was sprawled across her desk, surrounded by scrolls, her face pressed into an open book. She had given up on understanding spider anatomy and had moved on to trying to find any reference to dimensional travel in the Academy's archives.
There was nothing. No mentions of dream domains. No interdimensional communication. No helpful trucks.
You should sleep, the orb suggested.
"Can't," Hania mumbled into the book. "Need answers."
You can't find answers if you're dead from exhaustion.
"I'm not dead. I'm just... temporarily horizontal."
You've been 'temporarily horizontal' for three hours.
"I'm thinking."
You're drooling on the book.
Hania lifted her head. A small puddle of drool was forming on the page.
"..." She wiped her mouth with her sleeve. "It's part of my process."
Your process is concerning.
Hania pushed herself upright, her eyes red and unfocused. She had been trying to access her dream domain for hours.
She was exhausted, frustrated, and starting to hallucinate.
"Why won't it work?" she demanded. "I used to just fall asleep. Now I can't even do that."
I don't know what 'work' you're talking about. But maybe the rules have changed. You're not the same person you were two years ago.
"I'm the same person. I'm just... taller. And more traumatized."
You can't go back to the way things were. You have to find a new way.
Hania slumped back in her chair, her mind racing.
Then, an idea sparked.
She had been trying to force her way into the dream domain through willpower and magic. But maybe that was the problem. She was trying too hard. In the past, she had always stumbled into the dream domain by accident. By exhaustion.
So maybe... she just needed to be exhausted enough.
"Aha!"
The orb pulsed. That's a frightening sound. What did you just realize?
"I just realized I've been trying too hard. I need to let go. I need to exhaust myself to the point of collapse like before."
That sounds dangerous.
"It's not dangerous. It's strategic."
It sounds dangerous and stupid.
"Shut up, orb. I'm a genius."
Hania stood up, her eyes gleaming with manic energy. She grabbed the nearest scroll and started reading again. Then another. And another.
What are you doing?
"Staying awake. Eventually, my body will give out. And when it does, I'll be there where I need to be."
That's not how sleep works!
"Watch me."
The Next Morning...
Hania was a wreck.
She had stayed awake for thirty-six hours straight. Her eyes were bloodshot. Her hair looked like she had been attacked by a wild animal. She was wearing two different socks, three different scarves, and what might have been a spider's knitting project draped over her shoulders.
But she was still awake.
You look terrible, the orb observed.
"I feel... terrible... but I'm still... here..."
Maybe you should reconsider your strategy.
"Never... surrender..."
Hania took a staggering step forward and promptly collapsed onto the floor.
The orb zoomed over to her, pulsing with alarm. Hania! Hania, are you okay?
A snore escaped her lips.
...She's asleep. She actually did it.
The orb hovered over her, pulsing with a mix of exasperation and admiration.
You are the most stubborn human I've ever met.
The orb settled beside her.
I'll watch over you until you wake up. Sleep well, my human.
A pause.
And when you wake up, I'll give you a muffin.
★★★
In the Dream Domain...
Hania opened her eyes.
She was standing in the middle of the library, surrounded by glowing books that stretched as far as the eye could see. The familiar purple knitted steering wheel cover hung on a display shelf. The "World's Best Transport" air freshener dangled from a nearby hook.
But it was too quiet.
"TRUCK-KUN!" she shouted. "WHERE ARE YOU?!"
Her voice echoed through the empty stacks. No engine rumbled in response. No headlights flickered from the shadows.
She ran through the library, past shelves and shelves of books, calling his name.
"Truck-kun! ANSWER ME!"
She skidded to a halt in the central clearing. The space where he usually parked was empty. Just dust motes floating in the dim light.
He wasn't here.
Hania's heart pounded. "No. No, no, no—"
She spun around, searching desperately.
"Where are you?!" she screamed. "I came all this way! I exhausted myself to collapse! I—"
She stopped.
The books. The glowing books on the shelves, they were different now.
She walked toward the nearest shelf and pulled out a volume. The title read: "Dimensional Anchors: A Guide to Locked Spaces."
She opened it. The pages were blank.
She grabbed another: "Accessing the Pocket Dimension: When the Door Won't Open."
Blank.
Another: "So You've Lost Your Interdimensional Transport Vehicle."
Blank.
She threw the book across the room. It hit the wall and dissolved into golden sparks.
"TRUCK-KUN!" she screamed, her voice cracking. "I know you're out there! I know you're stuck in that garden! I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME!"
Silence.
She fell to her knees, tears streaming down her face. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm so sorry. I left you there. I got trapped in a coma for two years, and you might still be stuck to that tree, and now I can't even reach you."
She sat there for a long time, crying in the dust.
When she finally looked up, she noticed a book on the bottom shelf, pushed slightly forward, as if someone had been reading it recently.
She crawled over and pulled it out. The title read: "How to Stabilize a Dimensional Breach: For Idiots."
She opened it. The pages weren't blank.
"Step One: Locate the original anchor point. Without it, no bridge can be built."
Hania's eyes widened.
She scrambled to her feet, clutching the book. "I'll come back for you," she promised to herself. "I'll figure this out. I'll find a way to stabilize the breach, and I'll get you out of that tree."
She pressed the book to her chest.
"Just... hang on. I'm coming."
She closed her eyes, and the dream domain began to fade.
