Naruto: A Lazy Life

-Two days later-

...

"-Oh my, that is quite odd I will say" The doctor examines me.

"Yes, I thought so too" I acknowledge.

"Is it just the senses?" He asks.

"My sense of taste went first... then my ears and now my eyes" I inform him.

"Well- I have some theories but nothing concrete... If I had more time to study this phenomenon perhaps I could give you the answers you needed" He sighs.

"The war is closing up - you have too many patients to care about someone like me- I will come get you if anything else occurs" I stand up and head to the door.

...

"Make sure to rest, keep hydrated and if you aren't back within a month I will come looking personally- whatever is happening to you is something not seen before in any medical text book. At least the ones I have read" The doctor sighs and I turn to nod before leaving.

-Two weeks later-

*Sizzle~*

I pick up the steak from the pan and drop it on top of the plate- terrible sauce dripping from the meats every corner.. a dark substance supposedly hot enough to send one to the hospital- I am sure the bottle is fine however, I bought it from a travelling vendor.

*Sniff*

The smell is dulled too... I had Rin call out my personal hygiene yesterday and it will not happen again.

...

*Chomp*

I bite into the dull tasting steak and sigh to myself.

-Two days later-

*Sizzle~*

'{Again? are you crazy? That thing looks disgusting- find something more palatable even if it means not being able to save the taste}' The inner voice mocks me.

{It is fine- leave me} I sigh internally.

...

I pour a quarter of the bottle onto the steak- not because I need that much, rather that I my eyes are blurring up so much I do not acknowledge what I have done until it is too late.

Hn. This, truly is foul.

'{So you agree}'

Quite.

I turn the steak over to submerge it within the sauce... before turning the heat off and taking the pan over towards my plate- I deposit the steak onto the plate and head back towards the kitchen to return the dirty pan and grab a knife and fork.

'{Don't you have work? training?}'

Right- because they know me to be so punctual, keep it to yourself, if they need me or are curious about my situation then they can come get me, probably think I am home grieving Obito.

I slice straight through the steak and watch the meaty blur approach my mouth as I pull it up with a fork.

'{Taking permanent loss of all senses so lightly is what will allow me to take over this body- So please, eat as many nasty steaks as you require... all it takes is one wrong fall down the stairs and you are mine}' The inner voice laughs to himself.

*Chomp*

...

...

...

The world goes still as I realise what just happened.

I gulp- eating the bite I just chewed on... as I feel a very, very dangerously spicy sensation begin to crawl across my tongue.

...

And after a second more I Leap out of my chair and accidentally bump my plate off the table- *Crash* smashing into the ground.

The chair behind me falls over from my sudden leap as I curl over the table- breathing heavily as my sweat glands burn- my tongue on fire and the roof of my mouth in great pain.

I dash to the kitchen and open my fridge- downing the last of my milk.

...

I sit there- with the fridge door open and my mind racing in confusion and heat.

!

These... my tongue is back- my taste buds are back... my mouth feels... No- this sense of taste is not just enhanced, I can taste each ingredient within the sauce, the ingredients I couldn't read on the label... My sense of taste is precise- it is trained- These taste buds are MY taste buds.

...

What does that mean- why did my trained senses follow me into this life? I need answers- I need the doctor.

I quickly clean up after myself, all the pieces of broken plate and steak are picked up before I clean the general area.

-2 hours later-

"Okay... that is the final test- I am glad you had some inkling as to what happened, allowed me to get a grasp on a more prominent theory I had on you" The doctor sits before me, holding his hand out as a faint green hue emerges from his palm.

"And? What did you understand" I urge for more answers.

...

"Hm- It seems your body is reconstructing itself... your cells are dying off and being replaced very quickly- the entire tongue has transformed sure- but the mouth around it has followed through, with greater examination I have deduced that your body is healing a non-existent injury... and healing that injury with new and seemingly improved flesh" He clicks his tongue as his palm starts to move down to my chest.

"Your chakra is certainly the main cause- it is signalling to the rest of the body to heal quickly, as if you were in any danger, I have a few Jutsu that cause that same reaction when we need the body to help heal itself, but it never in any and all cases before this replaces itself with foreign senses and flesh. Your skin is getting pale here, your organs are slowly but surely following this change... I can see that even the nerves are being replaced" He examines closely.

My chakra is the main cause? I wonder...

'{Most certainly me. After you unshackled the Yang energy of the Emperor, your prior self... it seems to have made some changes to your new body to accommodate itself within your body naturally, good to know for my eventual takeover}' The inner voice confirms.

"Oh? even the bones across your body... tell me, have you gained a significant odour or stench recently- a need to wash thoroughly and more often?" He asks.

"Yes" I inform.

"I see- I think your... dead cells are pouring from the sweat glands... that are also slightly malfunctioning as they too get replaced" He hums.

"I understand now" I stand.

"Wait- do you feel fine? I have a few prescriptions I can give you- perhaps I can ask around if we have any medical jutsu or seals that specialize in something like this- we can revert the affects and get you back to yourself, I understand it may be shocking to suddenly wake up one day and not recognize yourself in the mirror..." He sighs and stands as I do.

"It is fine. If it starts killing me I will come for more help, but consider my medical case closed- I need no further support" I tell him.

I have a feeling that I will certainly recognize myself within that mirror.

"Then... stay out of work- keep to secure areas until you can see, smell and hear again, when your muscles and bones start to regenerate as furiously as your senses are, immediately notify someone so they can care for you in your time of need" He tells me.

"-Do you have anything to speed up the process?" I ask.

...

"I can fix something up for you. Wait for me here... I will be back in ten minutes" He heads out and I remain within the room.

After ten minutes pass he opens the door and hands me a few small patches.

"I could only think of this- use it for your muscles, only when your bones are regenerating in case your new muscles accidentally crush the old bones. It will speed it up tremendously- and I will check to see if there is anything else I can speed up... I will deliver it to your house with instructions" He nods to himself.

I look at the patches and notice seals on them.

"-Direct chakra through them and apply evenly across the body, if you have someone willing to use medical ninjutsu to heal you for a couple hours every day this process will go even faster" He tells me.

"Got it. Thank you doctor" I pocket the patches and walk out.

---

-four days later-

Pov: Rin Nohara.

*Knock- Knock*

I knock on Takumi's house... his door opens when I apply such a gentle force.

I peek inside before entering and walk down the hall to where his bedroom is, Takumi sits in bed wrapped in blankets- facing the wall.

...

"So this is where you have been huh? I didn't realise you were shutting yourself in so much..." I look around the room... a certain stench fills it.

Did Obito's death get to him that bad?

I walk over and sit on his bed.

"You know you can't just leave your door open, anyone could have walked straight into your house... Me and Kakashi are going to get ramen and he invited you- shocking right? I think he took a liking to you after... well you know" I cough lightly.

...

"Takumi?" I tap his shoulder and slowly turn him onto his back.

"Oh. This is a medical issue" I breathe a sigh of relief, not depression- good.

-Well this is not good either! but- never mind.

His face is incredibly pale... eyes are red, but no tomoe- does the sharingan have a form without those? Smells like he died in here.

...

*Tap*

Phew- he is alive.

I take my hand away from his pulse and examine him closer.

...

"How long have you been in here like this? this is a terrible state to be in" I sigh.

"I... am getting better, your assistance is not... required" Takumi responds in a daze.

Oh? so he could hear me.

"Is it hard to respond? does it hurt?" I ask.

"No... too much energy to talk... just fatigued- I visited the hospital, I am fine... I will be" Takumi takes a deep breath.

...

"I will come check up on you tomorrow- and then again next week, I have a simple D rank mission to do in the meantime so I will get someone else to come help you eat or wash up... do you need help now?" I ask softly.

"I need rest now" He states in reply.

"Okay... I will leave you be" I get up and head for the door, closing it and locking it as I leave.

...

"He coming?" Kakashi asks as I walk over to him.

"Has some form of medical problem currently, looks like a lot of fatigue or something... Are you in town while I am on that plant collecting mission? he could use some help eating and such" I ask.

"Nah, got my own mission- helping scout out old war camps in case any rogue shinobi are using them" He scratches his neck as we walk.

"Yeah... I will go get Saburo-san then, he is trained in this stuff so he can help out Takumi" I nod to myself.

---

-5 days later-

Pov: Takumi Uchiha.

...

I get up out of bed and shake my head- dust falls from my hair and I blink myself awake.

I stretch slowly as I get accustomed to my new body.

Everything feels in place- out of place if I were just Takumi Uchiha... but this body has become a bit more... Me.

I catch my red eyes in the reflection of my window and glance outside.

I can see so far into the distance- my sharp gaze witnessing many shinobi leaping from rooftop to rooftop... even some who are trying to do so stealthily.

I take in a deep breath and can smell the source of every stench within my room- even more I can smell what is out of date within my fridge... I can also smell where Saburo was yesterday, his faint tracks that my sharp nose catches.

I close my eyes and hear the wind outside, the many feet rumbling against the earth and the gentle wings of a small bird flapping over my house... I focus only on one noise and everything else is shut out- my ears are sharp and as trained as the day I lost them.

I clench my fists and look at my body- not ridden with scars, burns or wounds that my old body had, but this body is certainly mine... albeit much, much younger- I do not think I have ever seen a child with such muscles... maybe Maito is a close call.

I unclench my hands and look at my nails- sharp, dangerous- stronger.

I crack my neck and feel my spine click into place as everything works as I intend it too.

My chakra... is still forcing regeneration? I am healed however?

'{I can feel it- your body is always in perfect shape, you have the perfect body at the cost of constant maintenance}' The inner voice remarks.

Right- no training, no work out- my body has reset to a time it never truly visited, a time that my 'Yang' chakra only recognises.

Meaning I will no longer have to put effort into my body, all I need to do is wait until I grow into my greater self.

But that comes with a severe chakra penalty... almost half is taken from me- I thought I would receive a chakra boost from releasing my old energy but apparently that energy has soaked itself and half of my bodies chakra into one single act- perfection.

Not that I mind- I have always been frugal with my chakra and this body only cuts down on chakra usage... I can already feel that my justu will cost me much less than what this body is intaking.

*Knock!* *Knock!*

I come to my senses and dress myself before heading to the door and opening it.

Hn?

The Third Hokage stands outside my door- he takes a breath in as I see his eyes darting across my body, seeing all that I have hidden underneath this jacket... he was probably informed about this, but did not think the changes would be so significant.

"-Takumi, are you mission capable or not?" He asks.

"Why?" I raise my eyebrow.

"I need an answer- can you perform to the best of your abilities right this second?" He asks again.

"I can" I nod.

"Good- Perfect, I sent Kakashi ahead so you will need to catch up- Rin Nohara was kidnapped while on a mission and needs rescuing, I just sent Minato and many elites out to pacify the Iwa ninja looking for reasons to start this war up again and cannot distract them- Do I have your permission to send you on this mission?" He asks sternly.

If given the chance- I will not let my friends die, especially when granted the option to help them... if I knew Obito had... never mind that- lets focus on the present.

"Of course- Kakashi just departed from the front gate?" I ask as I step outside.

I do not like those gloomy clouds in the distance.

Hn. Axe, Stiletto, Spear. I pat my jacket for those scrolls and find them... I remove my slippers and send them inside my house before closing the door.

"Yes- your destination is-" He starts talking.

"I will track him" I sprint off.

*Thud- Thud-*

My feet thump against the ground and my sprint launches into a higher speed- I focus on my shinobi training and eventually silence the noise I am creating.

...

As soon as I leave the gate- I switch to the Saburo technique and increase my speed.