Slime Girl

- Shari -

"S-s-sorry, did I mishear just now?" (Shari)

Bedroom.

He did say bedroom, didn't he?

"Hah, that face is priceless! It's not like you to grow all flustered like this. I thought it was just a one-time thing? Maybe I did better than you made it out to be back then."

I don't even know your name?!

"E-e-excuse me, but what exactly do you want from me?" (Shari)

Maybe that will drive him off.

"Awh, how cold. It's almost like you don't recognize your old friend Devon anymore." (finally a name: Devon)

That's closer to the truth than you think it is.

I probably should cut this off before the fact that I know next to nothing about myself becomes apparent.

"Okay, Devon. I was in a bit of a business meeting right now. Maybe we can continue this talk another day?" (Shari)

"Awh, are you so ashamed about this? I thought we did pretty well. Nothing to complain about on my side. You were quite great." (Devon)

"Yes, yes. My... Risa... is always great!" (Liqu)

At this, his eyes grow wide as saucers, with an expression that makes me want to smack my own forehead, as well as Liqu's.

But I remain still, given that the wet sound could give me away.

"You too!? Damn, you dog! But well, she's certainly not someone to throw off the bedside. Dear Risa has some taste. And is wilder than I knew." (Devon)

"Ehm, what kind of taste? Did somebody get eaten?" (Liqu)

"You could say that." (Devon)

Argh, that smirk drives me crazy!

Can I kill him on behalf of the girl whose body I manipulate?

"Oh! Could you tell me more?" (Liqu)

Liqu?!

Oh no, I can't link inside these bodies to tell her off!

...

Since when did I get into this kind of thinking pattern?

"Hah, you want to share bedside stories?! I'd be up for it, but I can't quite say how our Risa would react to that." (Devon)

Okay, I'm pretty sure even Risa wouldn't let that guy run his mouth, which grants me an opening.

"Well, 'Risa' would cut off your balls if she heard anything else involving a 'bed' now." (Shari)

Seriously, I never even had the chance to do something like this, which makes this double as awkward.

I always considered this fact as a plus, you know, not missing the fruit you cannot eat, but right now I'm a bystander in a talk that concerns me!

"Oh well, then it's good that a bed was barely involved in any of those activities." (Devon)

Grah!

How can I shut this guy up?

I can't start a brawl, considering I don't possess any bones to back up my wish to hurt him.

And something tells me going right into stabbing would be frowned upon in this place.

"What kind of activities? I'm confused." (Liqu)

Liqu, stop talking!

"You know, the ol' in-and-out game. In all variations." (Devon)

"But how would she?" (Liqu)

Yeah, since I got turned into a slime, I'm quite excluded from this 'game', in all its variations!

Although right now, I-

...

You know what?

No!

No, I'm not gonna think about my lower body, or how much of the love channel I've left intact!

Not gonna happen!

I desecrated this body already enough as is.

"Stop it now and piss off, or I'm gonna throw you through the room." (Shari)

"Since when are you so frigid, Risa? You were a lot more amicable, while I plowed-" (Devon)

• Impact!

Just as I promised, this annoying pest commences to be accelerated to the other side of the room.

I aimed away from any people or tables, and I kinda hope he didn't break his neck.

Any other damage, I'd call fair game though.

"Sha-... Risa? Was that keeping a low profile? I'm not sure, but I don't think so." (Liqu)

If she just wouldn't be so correct about this!

"Sometimes you just have to do something, even if it's stupid." (Shari)

"Ah, okay. That's something I can understand." (Liqu)

I kinda feel like I just destroyed a lot of progress, regarding her social skills.

And now other adventurers are streaming in, while some others help up the guy I just threw against the wall.

One of them is closing in.

He looks more decent than the other guy, and maybe a bit more official.

"Wow, Risa. How did you do that? I thought your enhancement was mostly dexterity-based."

Do I have to answer this stranger?

"I... just executed this move well enough. It's not about strength, but the concrete technique I'll have to keep a secret." (Shari)

"Groan!" (Devon)

"... Hope this won't fall back to me." (Shari)

"Well, he's still alive. For anything else, house rules apply. He had it coming, but you may have to pay the damages your 'move' caused."

I pull out a silver coin.

Fortunately, the adventurers we killed could replenish my funds a bit.

I left most of the money I still had with Nia, for obvious reasons, so right now, I may barely reach the value of a gold coin in silver and copper.

Let's just hope the cost won't be too high.

"Well, this should cover it. Give it to Alva at the counter, and everything should be forgiven."

As I don't really want to get into a conflict with the guild, even in this fake persona, I do just that.

Alva is nice enough.

An older professional lady who gets the issue settled without a hitch.

They're apparently also going to stitch this Devon guy back together, which is fine by me.

All that is left would be to commence with my official business.

"So, Alva, I'd also like to report about my mission. Foremost, that it was a success and that I expect a messenger from the Marquis about receiving my reward." (Shari)

"This special mission from the public bureau? You know that the guild was only acting as an intermediary in that deal, right? We do not partake in any way in the concrete assignment." (Alva)

That was a lot of legal speech, and my head starts spinning.

"So?" (Shari)

"Therefore, the guild won't involve itself in any way in that deal." (Alva)

"Come on, you can send the guy my way if someone comes asking, right?" (Shari)

"We may, if they ask directly for you." (Alva)

"Good enough. So, out of curiosity, where should someone wait if they're waiting for a messenger of the Marquis?" (Shari)

Alva looks at me with wide-open eyes.

"Are you serious?" (Alva)

"Uh, yes? I mean, do I have to stay here, or would you send the message to my home address?" (Shari)

Which would be where?

Seriously, I'm in dire need of finding out my corpse's home address.

I mean, thinking about it, do I have private quarters?

That would be the place where one would usually be personally contacted at, right?

"I repeat, are you serious, Risa?!" (Alva)

Damn, that didn't work out.

Seems like I have to appease her and somehow salvage what I can from this.

"Well, nobody explains this kind of stuff to you!" (Shari)

Hopefully, I'll get at least something out of her.

"Seriously, in an important case like this, you should wait in the attendance rooms for the Marquis' dispatch. That you fool around here instead is already quite unbecoming." (Alva)

Huh, they have attendance rooms?

That's actually pretty convenient for my general situation.

Although I'd still like to know where this girl used to live.

On the other hand, it might be pretty weird to rummage through her stuff after I already killed her.

"Well, I'm not your ordinary adventurer." (Shari)

"That much is for sure, but... Oh, it seems like the waiting time is already over." (Alva)

I follow her gaze and see how a man in most formal clothes has just entered.

I'd reckon this is the one to fetch Liqu and me.

Seems like stuff is starting to get set into motion.