I Have a God Simulator

Lie Yu felt she didn't have much longer to live.

She woke up drunk and went to bed dizzy every day, finding it harder and harder to tell day from night.

She had been living in a drunken stupor for nearly half a year.

Tasting the brew was something the brewer had to do herself; no one else could do it for her.

This had never been a problem in the past.

That was because the yield of Honey Wine had always been very low.

To make Honey Wine, the honey had to be diluted with water, then boiled at a high temperature before it could be fermented. The entire process required precise control, and every step was time-consuming and labor-intensive.

Honey had always been an expensive food, and the amount available for brewing was small.

Brewing Honey Wine was delicate work that required both money and patience.

But ever since Lie Yu arrived at the Dwarf Fortress, that had all changed completely.

After drinking her Honey Wine, the dwarves reached a unanimous agreement: as long as she was willing to stay at the Dwarf Fortress and brew for them, they would provide all the honey she needed! Whatever amount she asked for, they would give her.

All in the name of brewing a wine even better than this!

They even gave Lie Yu a nickname, calling her the "Honey Wine Princess."

According to the oral traditions of the Fireplace Race, their ancestors had been friends with many princesses. Those princesses were either of noble birth or had experienced extraordinary adventures, but all were beautiful, charming, and respectable ladies.

Lie Yu felt the title didn't suit her at all.

She was no noble lady, just a huntress who had spent her childhood climbing mountains and braving the seas. Besides, she was in her thirties and no longer a young woman.

Lie Yu was well aware that she wasn't a great beauty. 'How could an Adventurer, exposed to the sun and rain, possibly maintain fair and delicate skin?'

Not that she cared about any of that.

She had a pair of nimble, powerful hands, crisscrossed with tiny scars. They could scale trees with ease, draw a bow and shoot an arrow, cling to cliffside rocks, snatch birds from the air, and skillfully gather honey.

She had a pair of tireless legs that could run for ages like a rabbit's and could land a precise kick to a ruffian's weak spot.

She had the face of an Adventurer, and smudges of dirt and sweat were her finest battle adornments.

Lie Yu had been cornered in a cave by a pride of lions and chased through the water by Cannibal Crabs. She'd been ambushed by fellow Adventurers and had run-ins with scheming merchants... and she wasn't the least bit afraid.

An Adventurer had to learn to face life with a smile.

But now, she was a little scared.

For the first time, Lie Yu felt the very real possibility that she might drink herself to death in the Dwarf Fortress. The thought of dying that way—following in her great-grandfather's footsteps—only made her headache worse.

She rubbed her forehead, downed a large glass of water, but her head still felt groggy and her body unsteady.

"Are you all right?" a dwarf asked, steadying her.

"I'm fine... just a bit of a headache. A little honey will help."

Lie Yu took down one of the countless jars lining the wall, scooped out a spoonful of honey, and stirred it into a cup of water before tilting her head back and drinking it down.

That honey water helped one sober up was a small discovery of Lie Yu's family.

As her head cleared a little, she noticed the dwarf standing before her was beardless. It was the female dwarf, Huoo Shaoyun—her roommate.

"You gave me a real fright yesterday, you know."

The dwarf woman let out a hearty laugh, her smile wide. "I helped you back here, and what happens? You start singing and dancing, going on about how you want to use the roses from the Divine Valley to make rose wine."

"What was that song you were singing again?"

Huoo Shaoyun staggered around, mimicking a drunkard, and sang terribly out of tune, "Rose, rose~ I love you~"

Lie Yu's ears burned red. She quickly put up a hand to stop her. "All right, all right, that's enough!"

Huoo Shaoyun asked curiously, "Are there really giant White Roses in the Eastern Continent's Divine Valley? I heard there are straits and high mountains, and lots of Extraordinary Creatures. The High Furnace Wonders are planning to go there next."

"Yes."

Lie Yu touched her burning ears. "Mr. Yan Jiu was cultivating there. He was constantly clashing with the Monster Strength Grass—it's a very tough, powerful creature... He saw the White Rose there."

"It's enormous, taller and more striking than the surrounding pine trees. The air around it is filled with a fresh, floral scent. It shoots out sharp thorns, making it both beautiful and dangerous. Only the Green Swallowtail Butterfly and the Malachite Butterfly can get close without being attacked."

Huoo Shaoyun's face filled with longing. "If you used that rose to make wine, it would be incredibly fragrant, wouldn't it?"

"..."

Lie Yu looked resigned. "Mr. Yan Jiu couldn't even get close back then; the White Rose's thorns are too dangerous. If we could get our hands on some of its wilted petals, though, there might be a way."

"We'll find the petals. Can you brew the rose wine?"

"If you can really get them, I think I can."

Seeing that the dwarf wasn't joking, Lie Yu gave her earnest promise.

"Then it's a deal!"

They bumped fists, then opened their palms flat against each other.

This was a custom of the Fireplace Race for sealing an oath.

Huoo Shaoyun asked again, "Other than that, have you been to Canopy City in the Divine Valley?"

"We've seen it, but we didn't go up into the canopy."

Lie Yu recalled, "The red pine trees there carry a toxin, so it's easy to get Poisoned if you venture inside. I saw it from a distance with Mr. Yan Jiu. The Pine Slipper Rats in the trees were bustling about. They can't speak, but they traded pinecones with us for our wheat cakes. A very friendly bunch."

"Oh..."

Seeing Huoo Shaoyun's troubled expression, Lie Yu realized something might be on her mind.

"What's wrong? Did something happen?"

"Nothin' like that," the dwarf woman said. "It's just that Yan City has established a Martial Cultivation Association. They're organizing Martial Cultivators to formally enter the Divine Valley, to 'survey the situation,' they say."

Lie Yu had little interest in this.

Right now, she only had three things on her mind: brewing, brewing, and more brewing.

"Oh, one more thing. Almost forgot, I did."

Huoo Shaoyun pulled a necklace from within her armor. It had a very delicate brass chain, and its pendant was a flawless white seashell.

"This here's a rare piece of Fine Equipment!"

The dwarf woman said excitedly, "Even for the Fireplace Race, creating something this good requires tons of precious materials, not to mention a great deal of complex craftsmanship and Forging!"

"You'll understand once you put it on."

Lie Yu tried on the necklace.

As she fastened the clasp, she felt a warm power envelop her. The dizziness clouding her mind immediately vanished, leaving her feeling clear-headed.

"This is incredible..." Lie Yu murmured, gently touching the necklace.

"We all made it specially for you. We know you're always getting drunk. With this, you won't get tipsy so easily."

Huoo Shaoyun said seriously, "The necklace is called the 'Honey Wine Princess.' Its power is 'Alcohol Immunity.' It was made with many Extraordinary materials, including the musk sac of a Musk Ladybug, oil secreted by a Sand Worm, and an All-Purpose Stone found by the Fish People... As long as you wear it, you won't get drunk. Everyone failed hundreds of times before we finally forged it successfully. It was made just for you."

Lie Yu didn't know whether to laugh or cry. The dwarves really were obsessed with the "Princess" title.

"Thank you all!"

she thought, deeply moved.

'The Fireplace Race really is as passionate as their name suggests. Once they considered you a friend, they treated you with complete, unreserved sincerity.'

Lie Yu secretly resolved to brew the absolute best Honey Wine to repay her dwarf friends.

Suddenly, someone outside shouted, "Everyone, come out and look! There's a new sun! Hey, this one's blue!"

Lie Yu and Huoo Shaoyun walked out of the Dwarf Fortress.

She looked up.

A blue sun was slowly rising into the sky, emitting an ethereal glow like the depths of the ocean. It stood in the sky opposite the other, golden sun.

The dwarves all stared up at the two suns, clucking their tongues in amazement.

The other two members of the High Furnace Wonders were there as well.

Gao Youzhuang crossed his arms. "This new sun... I wonder if the God will banish it. Hope it knows to behave itself. Otherwise, it'll end up just like the Dark Sun."

"No, no, look closely."

Weii Ermeng, standing beside him, said, "Agao, focus and feel it. That blue sun carries Lord Yao God's Divine Power... Can you feel it?"

"You're right... So it's a sun made by Lord Yao God."

"Hey, you two, don't get distracted! Look closely at that sun. You can make a wish... It's called the 'Wishing Star.'"

"It's a Blessing from the Lord God! Quick, everyone, make a wish!"

Just by gazing at the blue sun, everyone could instantly understand that this new celestial body carried incredible Divine Power. It was listening to the innermost thoughts of every one of Yao God's Believers. To pray and make vows to it was to earn the God's attention.

Lie Yu touched the "Honey Wine Princess" necklace at her throat.

She crossed her index fingers, looked toward the Wishing Star, and prayed silently.

'Oh, omnipotent Yao God, please let me figure out the best recipe for Honey Wine soon...'