Chapter 28 | PoV: Sanya
“Sanya!” Mai waved from the hallway. The other students from Mai's class continued down the tunnel to dinner or elsewhere. Barakat had released them before Nur released Sanya's class.
Sanya was the first one out of the room. She waved back to Mai. It seemed that Sanya would not be able to separate herself from Mai—not that she wanted to, exactly. It was just that . . . they were practically glued together outside of class.
What would happen when those in Barakat's class became abyssal—no, spatial—mages? Would they graduate into Nur’s class? If so, Sanya and Mai really would be glued together.
Mai put her hands behind her back and leaned toward Sanya. “Shall we go to dinner?”
“Sure,” Sanya said simply before deciding to add something. “But I'm not feeding you this time.”
Sanya ignored the concerned, confused, and judging gazes from those around that had heard her—like the students now coming out of Nur's, or the last ones to leave Barakat's, in front of Mai.
Speaking of Nur's, the one kid kicked out of class was nowhere to be seen.
Mai gave Sanya a smirk. “We’ll see about that.”
“Hmph.”
☆ ☆ ☆
Sanya and Mai left the dining room.
Sanya could not believe herself. She radiated a suppressed aura of tension and shame. Why had she done that?
Again?
If Mai asked for Sanya a second time, she did not know if she would be able to deny her like she had the last. Sanya was utterly hopeless to the wants of Mai. That worried her.
It was to see Mai grin. Sanya adored getting Mai to smile—which . . . was easy, at least. And Sanya could definitely get Mai to smile without doing weird things. Why did she enjoy being fed so much? She had the hands! Pick up her own fork and eat!
Yet, she didn't want to say no or deny Mai. Sanya did even want to do these things.
She was upset that she wanted to do these things.
Was this healthy? She didn't think this was healthy. Something was wrong with Sanya. Maybe she should get as far away from Mai as she could.
But, she liked Mai.
Argh!
The stares and glares had turned into whispers and snickering. It would not be long before Sanya and Mai were made into the clowns of the cavern.
What should she do? What should they do? Where did they even go from here?
Mai, smiling minutes ago, now looked up at Sanya with a concerned expression. Sad. Pity, almost.
“Will you let me bite off the rest or your nails?” Mai asked out of nowhere.
Sanya stopped walking and glared at her. The last thing she needed was more attention from the other students. The other last thing she needed right now was to let Mai do something weird with Sanya.
Mai giggled. “Sorry, it was a joke. I couldn't help myself. Unless . . .”
“Stop,” Sanya put out a palm. She would put up her other hand and rub her forehead too if it weren't for the fact she was holding her staff. “Please. It's not funny."
“Aw, okay.”
Mak stopped as well. They stood in the middle of the hallway, staring at each other, as if trying to figure out what to say.
Mai opened her mouth to speak.
“Hey!” Some girl shouted. “Why'd you stop in the middle of the hallway? I don't even want to see your little show, at least get back to your room first, for Heliux's sake!”
She followed with a slur targeted towards Sanya.
Sanya turned to her and blinked. There was plenty of room in the hallway. And a slur, really?
Ah. It wasn't “some girl.” It was Aaliyah, the one Mai had run into the day before.
Aaliyah's arms were closed, she looked to be seventeen, maybe even sixteen. A retinue of two other kids stood behind her, slightly younger, cruel gazes piercing Sanya. They had their faces scrunched like they smelled something bad.
Sanya's fist empty curled. Her other hand gripped her staff, no doubt leaving a red impression for once she released her grip.
She tried to control her breathing. Her face contorted.
“If you're not going to move, then . . .” Aaliyah continued forward. She shoved Sanya with considerable force as she walked passed. Sanya's heart dropped.
Sanya collided with Mai, who collapsed to the floor. Sanya lost her balance and fell on top of Mai. Sanya's left hand and right knuckles pressed against the floor, her knees touching the cold cavern ground. Mai was laying on her back, silent, wincing, arms splayed, legs flat. A-at least someone fell and held onto their staff this time!
Aaliyah laughed. “Oh my! These—” Sanya's brain completely ignored the slur. “—are doing it in the middle of the hallway!”
Mocking laughter followed. The three continued down the hallway. Some bystanders watched as it happened silently. Where on Heliux's forsaken hellscape was a staff member? Anyone?
Students fresh out of the dining room glanced down as they walked past Sanya and Mai. She could feel their presence and their cast looks.
The worst part was, Mai was staring up at Sanya, face flushed. Sanya hurried to stand back up.
Once up, she extended a hand out towards Mai.
After a second too long, Mai took Sanya's hand. She pulled Mai off the ground.
They stood still again, staring at each other, saying nothing. Sanya's stomach fluttered—and the hundred butterflies in there, those helped too. Sanya's face flushed too. Sanya couldn't deal with this right now. She didn't know what to say, how to say it. Things couldn't continue like this.
. . . Was this still better than before the academy? Back then, no one talked to her. No one approached her. She was another urchin on the streets that no one paid attention to. After those thugs, no one had bothered her again.
Why couldn't she use her magic on Aaliyah and her friends like Sanya had with those thugs a year ago? Why didn't she just evoke fear in everyone and get them all to leave her alone?
Why did she have to feel these things for Mai and make everything awkward and worse?
Sanya broke off Mai's hand and ran down the hall.
☆ ☆ ☆
Sanya practically stormed down the hallway of the girls’ dorm. She didn't know why. Collapsing into her bed wouldn't leave her alone, and wouldn't distance herself from Mai.
If she wasn't with Mai all the time, would she still be picked on?
Maybe Sanya should go say hello to Esmat and whoever the second non-binary was. Maybe people like them needed to stick together.
Or it would put all the targets in one spot.
A girl stood out in the hallway, upon seeing Sanya, she stuck her head into a door and whispered something. She walked past Sanya, heading back out of the dorms, casting a smirk at Sanya.
Sanya had a bad feeling about this. She wasn't free from torment today, apparently. She wasn't religious, but . . .
Heliux, save me.
Sanya did not make it past that room.
A leg stuck out from the doorway.
It connected with Sanya's left leg, tripping her.
You're kidding me.
Sanya fell to the floor. She threw her staff, arms stretched out to hit the ground first, so her face wouldn't.
Her arms hit the cold ground hard. Her body came next, nose smushed against the floor.
Pain from her palms, from her face . . .
Had this not happened before? Right, when she ran away after stealing the razor. Not even three days ago and someone already tripped her again!
“What's a boy doing in the girls’ dorm? Snuck your way in to prey on girls?” Someone taunted.
Sanya sighed. She didn't have the energy to deal with this right now. What was this, some bigot moon, where all the dunces emerged from their little holes and dedicated themselves to tormenting?
Sanya pushed her upper body off the ground, sitting on her knees. Then, her position became a kneel. She reached for her staff and picked it up.
“What? Are you a mute when you're not with your innocent little plaything? That stupid girl that doesn't know any better? That she doesn't know you're a sand shark in sheep's clothing?”
Sanya turned to face the girl. Not Aaliyah or her retinue.
Sanya pointed her staff at the girl.
The girl smiled. “Oh? What's this? Gonna do some magic? Wow! You really are cold and vile!”
“[Organic Displacement],” Sanya incantated.
She pointed to the dorm entry. The girl appeared down the hall. Confused and flustered.
Mai had been walking down the hallway towards Sanya, but upon seeing the girl disappear and pop up right behind her, turned to face her.
“I heard that!” Mai started. “Sanya is a girl! I didn't realize your skull was so thick you couldn't even notice your own kind!”
“You dare put me in with that?”
“Sanya is not preying on anyone!” Mai practically screamed. “I like her! If anything, I've been preying on her!” Heads poked out from doorways and snuck peaks out into the hallway, looking for the source of commotion.
“Poor thing, she really has you trapped,” she muttered.
“Shut up!” Mai barked. Mai took a hand and slapped the girl.
She froze. Her shock and frown turned into a grin. “You're so pathetic! You're weak!”
She broke out into laughter. This girl was despicable. Truly a waste of space.
Sanya clenched her jaw, she could feel her teeth straining. She really had enough. Suddenly, she had an idea. Wicked. Malevolent. Revenge.
Sanya pointed at herself with her staff. “[Organic Displacement].” She pointed at the ground near the girl.
Not-body screaming. Parts broken down into a million pieces, then rearranged. Fire and heat and cold and nothingness like some ancient, cosmic forge . . .
One disintegrated Sanya later, she stood next to the girl.
Without hesitating, she swung her staff at the girl. Otherworldly metal and reinforced crystal collided with her skull, accompanied by a cracking noise.
Sanya heard gasps and frightened mutterings.
She crumpled to the ground, hitting the floor on her side . . . that wasn't enough.
Sanya gave her a kick for good measure. Her body fell to her back, arms limp. People stood, stunned and silent.
That taken care of, Sanya turned around and headed back to her room. A long emptiness ensued. That would teach that girl once she woke up. Hopefully she and the others would learn not to mess with Sanya from now on. She had enough! She was tired of this! It was her second day!
“S-Sanya?” Mai finally squeaked. “Oh, Heliux. Oh . . . great golden shell of the divine . . . Sanya!”
Sanya controlled her breathing. Everything was fine. Everything was nice, normal, and cool. No worrying. Nothing happened.
As she walked by, students slunk back into their rooms. Some shut doors.
Sanya opened the door to her room. Zahira was not there. The llumifruits glowed dimly.
Thoughts in the background of her mind twitched to the forefront. That one student in the forge, when making their staves. Aaliyah's confrontation outside the dining hall. The event with the girl just a minute ago . . .
Those thoughts came to the front. Intrusive. Loud. Feeding on her self-hate. Her torment. Her disappointment. Her grief. Her guilt. It all flooded her, overwhelming.
Blood boiling.
Sanya went to her bed and picked something up from underneath it.
She promptly left her room.
Mai intercepted her at the door.
She glanced down at Sanya's hand, and swallowed. “Sanya?”
Sanya ignored her. She turned to head to the washroom.
She couldn't even take four steps before Mai grabbed a hold of Sanya's wrist.
“Sanya!” Mai said, like a mother issuing a warning.
Sanya glared at her. She snapped. “Is all you can say my name?”
Mai looked like she had taken a punch to the face and watched her dog die. “Where are you going with that? You shaved this morning.”
“I have to do it twice the way it grows back.”
Mai's grasp tightened. She raised an eyebrow.
“Get off my back.”
Mai shook her head.
“Mai. Let me go.”
“Hand me . . . the razor.”
Sanya paused. She took a breath, then released it in a great sigh. “Fine.”
“You said that through grit teeth.”
“Fine!” Sanya shouted. She whirled around, breaking free from Mai's grasp. Sanya opened her hand and held out the razor for Mai.
She reached for it.
Sanya gripped it again, tight like a constricting snake, and slashed out.
Blood. A crimson liquid. All over Sanya's razor. Smeared across Mai's hand.
Drip. Drip. Drop.
It stained the floor. The strong tang iron permeated the air.
Mai stood for a moment, then fell to her knees. Instead of looking at her hand, she looked up at Sanya.
Sanya did not look at Mai's face. It would only make her feel worse. She knew what Mai's face probably looked like anyway. Betrayal. Fear. Concern.
Wh—what had Sanya just done? . . . Oh . . . Oh no . . .
Sanya had ruined everything. Not just because of her actions now, but earlier too. She couldn't go on like this. She couldn't face Mai.
Sanya rushed for the washroom at the far end of the dorm, where the fruits went dim and the rooms empty. She did not look back, not once. Mai did not pursue her. No one else pursued her.
She got there and slammed the door behind her. Finally, alone. Peace and quiet.
She slid her back against the door and fell into a sitting position.
She started to cry. Tears ran down her face and soon soaked her arms and clothes. Choking, wailing sobs followed.
Then, her own blood.