Chapter 57 – Why Do You Want to Be a Hero?
Tenya was clenching his fists so tightly that if he didn't have gloves, his nails would make his hands bleed. His gaze was low; a sense of frustration, anger, worthlessness, and embarrassment was visible on his face.
Izuku had turned completely, watching Tenya carefully without letting a single reaction from the boy slip before speaking.
«Angry, huh?»
The question, more of a statement than a question, triggered Tenya's head, crossing his gaze with that of the Custodian.
«Sorry?»
«You're not angry because I stole your prey.» Izuku calmly stated «You're angry- no, frustrated because Shield-san and I protected you and bled for you. You didn't want to be protected; you wanted to prove something by facing the Hero Killer, yet you ended up getting protected.»
Izuku's tone was not derisive. He was incredibly cold and calm, typical of someone simply presenting the facts.
It was disturbing. It was disturbing to Tenya that Izuku needed so little to understand his feelings, even as he struggled to categorise or assimilate them.
«I won't sweeten your pill: you're still immature, scared, and indecisive, Ida-san.»
«Midoriya-san!» Melissa called shouting
At the call, Izuku gave her a cold, sharp look. A crude, scary way to tell her to shut up and stop interfering.
«When I was six, I had to make a decision that no child should make. The first of many decisions, one more difficult than the other, and if I ever regretted it, I can't know because I never had the luxury of thinking about it. I had to harden my heart and swallow bites so bitter that I still feel the ghost of that bitterness in my mouth. But never once have I forgotten that what I do is for the good of the innocent. When I finally got home, I didn't enter the UA Heroes Course because I wanted to become a hero. I did it for the safety of my loved ones, Ida-san. But what are your reasons?» Izuku asked «Why did you decide to pursue a career as a hero?» he asked, overcoming it.
Izuku hadn't asked him that question because he wanted an answer. It was a question Tenya would have to answer to himself. But that question also helped restore clarity to the young man, prompting him to recall two past events.
The first was that sense of worthlessness when Ochaco was crushed under the rubble of the fake city during the entrance exam. On that occasion, he blamed the situation, the unfolding events, and his constant search for a credible excuse for not intervening to save the girl who would have been his classmate.
The second, instead, was an argument with his brother when he was ten years old.
[Flashback]
«Do you want to be a hero too, Tenya?!»
«Yes!» Tenya confidently stated, moving his arm mechanically «It's legitimate, brother! Can you give me some advice? What drives you to be a hero?»
His brother, Tensei Ida, looked at him with a kind expression, amused yet tired by how Tenya seemed to imitate a robot.
«To pick up girls.»
«How impure!» Tenya exclaimed in shock
«I was joking.»
«Joking?!»
His brother turned around, giggling, intent on placing pieces of his hero costume on the nearby mannequin.
«Well, our grandfather and our parents are heroes, so it was a bit of a given that I would take over the family business too.» he said, then turned to Tenya «Plus, it made sense to me.»
Tenya, realising that his brother wanted him to pass him the last piece of the costume, moved and handed the helmet.
«But I've always thought that those people who are willing to go to the rescue of people in need are fantastic people.» Tensei said, looking at his helmet «And I wish I were just like one of those people who helps those in danger.»
«So why not be a cop or something?»
«But are you listening to me? You take things too literally!»
Tensei was embarrassed by his little brother's question, but after an amused sigh, he began to caress Tenya's head.
«You're much more athletic and intelligent than me and you try much harder than me at your age, Tenya.» he said, then paused for a moment, almost as if he had an epiphany «Wait a minute. That's my secret! Knowing that you admire so much makes me feel better. So I can only do my best to make you proud.» he ended laughing.
[End of the Flashback]
Ida stood still. His thoughts were in turmoil because he now had greater clarity about what he was feeling.
I'm pathetic. The Hero Killer is right. I am different from my brother, Midoriya-san and Shield-san. They didn't hesitate to help others, but I… dragged them into my selfishness.
«Ida-san»
Feeling called, he turned and saw that Melissa had also regained the ability of her body, her blue eyes full of concern.
«Shield-san.» he called her, looking away, feeling unworthy of the girl's concern «You shouldn't have been involved in all this. Forgive me.»
«Don't say something like that.» Melissa said worriedly «In fact, I'm guilty because I should have tried to talk to you, seeing how much you were suffering.»
«The Hero Killer was right.» Tenya said, shaking her head «The whole time I was only thinking about myself… I'm not worthy of being a hero.»
Melissa didn't really know how to respond to that statement. On the one hand, she cursed her teacher for saying unnecessary things; on the other, she was worried about the class representative.
She wanted to tell him that it's not true, that he's more than worthy of carrying the title of hero on his shoulders. But no matter how much Melissa wanted to tell him, subconsciously the words couldn't come out of her lips.
«I will never hesitate again.» Ida said, looking past Melissa at the golden giant intent on checking the hero Native «If I wish to deserve the title of hero, to carry the weight of the name Ingenium on my shoulders, I must never hesitate again.»
«Ida-san» Melissa called him again, taking his hand, surprising him. «Don't be reckless. Not hesitating does not mean abandoning fear. Remember that there are people who are always waiting for your return.»
«...You're right, Shield-san.» Tenya said, starting to cry and lowering her head «And I've lost sight of even that because of my thirst for-?!»
Melissa, no longer knowing how to react, did something that would normally be embarrassing for her and the recipient. She began to stroke his head shyly.
«It's over, Ida-san. It's finally over. You did your best.»
Tenya didn't move, surprised by Melissa's act, but also comforted by that simple gesture.
Izuku, not far away, was looking at the scene with expressionless eyes before sighing. But it wasn't a disappointed sigh. It was the sigh of someone who felt like they had fixed something that, if left to its own devices, could become a disaster.
For this, he played the "bad cop" role with Tenya. If he hadn't spoken to him that way, he probably could have ended up creating resentment, and the boy could have ended up losing sight of what is truly precious to him. Melissa's actions were just a bonus, a consolation to help swallow that painful pill more easily.
Izuku disarmed and tied up the unconscious Hero Killer and, turning his gaze, nodded to Native, who had regained control over his body, as the effects of Stain's Quirk had now waned. Native knew it was time to move.
«Let's go» Izuku said as he dragged the Hero Killer.
When the four people exited the alley, the first person they saw was Gran Torino, who ran out of a nearby side street.
«Ah?! That's where you were!» exclaimed the elderly hero with his face streaked with sweat «What the hell are you doing here, girl?!»
Seeing him, Melissa smiled and raised her hand to say hello and let him know she was okay.
«Gran Torino!»
«I told you to stay close to me!»
Along with that exclamation, Melissa was kicked in the face, causing a slight amused grin to appear on Izuku's expressionless face.