Chapter 169: Shared Guilt
For a few seconds neither woman spoke.
The kitchen felt painfully quiet now without Phil's warmth filling the space.
Gloria stood near the counter still holding her sunglasses tightly while Claire watched her with exhausted understanding.
Then Gloria laughed softly once under her breath.
"She used to call me before her own mother when she was upset sometimes."
Haley trusted Gloria that deeply.
Claire folded her arms tightly around herself.
"She won't answer me either."
Not fully true.
Not fully false.
Haley had responded to exactly one text from Claire earlier:
i need time
Nothing else.
Then Gloria sat slowly at the kitchen island like her legs suddenly felt weak.
"I keep replaying everything."
Claire understood immediately.
The rooftop dinner.
The family photos.
The encouragement.
The pretending.
Then Gloria whispered:
"I told her she deserved someone who made her feel understood."
Claire physically looked away.
Because she remembered saying similar things herself.
The emotional hypocrisy of it felt unbearable now.
Then Gloria's composure cracked further.
"She trusted me around him." Her voice trembled. "Do you understand how sick that makes me feel now?"
Claire closed her eyes briefly.
"Yes."
And that was the horrifying part.
They both understood now.
Fully.
No more rationalization left.
Then Gloria looked up suddenly.
"Does Alex hate us?"
The wording mattered.
Not:
hate me.
Us.
Claire leaned back slightly against the counter.
"She's angry."
"Fair."
"But mostly she's scared."
That quieted Gloria immediately.
Because suddenly the situation became larger than guilt again.
The family itself stood at risk now.
Then Gloria laughed once weakly.
"You know what's horrible?" She rubbed at her eyes carefully. "Part of me still misses him."
The honesty of the confession settled heavily into the room.
Claire didn't judge her.
Couldn't.
Because she felt it too.
And that was the nightmare:
even after hurting Haley,
even after exposure,
the emotional attachment hadn't magically disappeared.
Then Claire whispered quietly:
"I think that's why this became dangerous."
Gloria looked toward her.
Claire stared down at the kitchen counter while speaking slowly, like she was finally forcing herself to say the truth aloud without hiding behind euphemisms.
"It stopped being fantasy months ago." A small pause. "It became part of real life."
Work.
Routine.
Comfort.
Emotional dependence.
Gloria nodded faintly.
Then softly:
"I think we both fell in love with the version of ourselves around him."
Because that had always been the real core underneath everything.
Not lust.
Recognition.
Then Gloria's expression suddenly tightened again.
"Jay asked me this morning if I was unhappy."
Claire looked up immediately.
"And?"
"I lied."
Now both women had crossed the same line:
not physical betrayal,
but conscious deception toward people who loved them.
Then Gloria whispered:
"I never thought I'd become this person."
Claire almost laughed at the familiarity of the thought.
Because she'd been thinking the exact same thing all morning.
Then footsteps sounded upstairs.
Both women stiffened instantly.
Alex appeared halfway down the staircase holding her laptop against her chest.
She stopped after seeing them together in the kitchen.
And suddenly the reality of the situation became visible in one devastating image:
Claire,
Gloria,
both guilty,
both emotionally wrecked,
standing together in silence like survivors of the same disaster.
Alex looked at them for several long seconds.
Then quietly:
"She really loved both of you."
