Modern Family: More than Family

Claire pointed at her with a dish towel.

"Do not enjoy this."

"I'm enjoying it a little."

"You're enjoying it a lot."

Gael stood near the sink drying dishes, trying not to laugh.

Failing, mostly.

Phil leaned against the fridge, grinning.

"For the record, I understand the confusion."

Claire turned slowly toward him.

"Phil."

"What? You both have responsible energy, same vibes."

Luke nodded seriously.

"Yeah. Responsible-hot vibes."

Claire closed her eyes.

"Luke, go anywhere else."

"Worth it."

Luke vanished before she could assign him chores.

A few minutes later, Phil got distracted by something on television, and Haley followed him into the living room after stealing candy from one of the grocery bags.

The kitchen finally quieted.

Claire rinsed the last plate with more force than necessary.

Gael dried it and set it aside.

"You're taking this pretty hard," he said lightly.

"I am not."

"You threatened your daughter with a dish towel."

"She deserved it."

"She did."

That got a reluctant smile out of her.

Claire leaned back against the counter, arms folded, looking more embarrassed than upset.

"It's not the misunderstanding," she said after a second. "It's that this family will never let it die."

"That part's true."

"Haley is going to gossip with Gloria."

"Also true."

"And Gloria will make it sound ten times worse."

"Almost definitely."

Claire groaned and looked toward the ceiling.

"I need new relatives."

Gael laughed quietly.

The back door was still open, letting in cool evening air from the patio. The house had settled into that rare post-dinner lull where everyone was still around but nobody was actively destroying anything.

Claire glanced toward the open door.

"I'm getting air before Phil starts act two of his reenactment."

"Smart."

Gael followed her outside with the last two glasses from the counter.

The patio was quiet compared to the kitchen.

Warm lights glowed over the table.

The backyard smelled faintly of grass and nighttime air.

From inside, Phil's voice rose dramatically before Haley burst out laughing.

Claire rested her elbows on the patio railing and shook her head.

"He's doing the voice again."

"He committed to the role."

"He always does."

For a few seconds, neither of them said anything.

It wasn't tense.

Just quieter than usual.

Claire glanced at him, still faintly amused.

"She really did look confident, though."

"The woman?"

"She looked at us like she'd solved a puzzle."

Gael smiled.

"To be fair, you were buying my coffee."

Claire gave him a look.

"You are enjoying this now."

"A little."

"Traitor."

The word came out soft enough to make them both smile.

Inside, Haley's laughter echoed again, closer this time.

Claire looked back toward the door.

"She's going to be impossible for days."

"She usually is."

"You're not supposed to agree that fast."

"She trained me."

Claire laughed, then shook her head again.

"Great. Now I've lost you to my daughter's bad influence."

The patio door slid open before Gael could answer.

Haley stepped out wearing one of his hoodies, candy in hand, eyes moving between them instantly.

"There you are."

Claire sighed.

"I had five peaceful minutes."

"You had three."

"Felt like five."

Haley walked over and slipped beside Gael, leaning against him without thinking much of it.

"What are we talking about?"

"Your cruelty," Claire said.

Haley smiled.

"So me."

"Exactly."

Gael looked down at Haley as she stole the glass from his hand and took a sip.

"That's mine."

"You're mine. This is included."

Claire made a sound somewhere between a laugh and a groan.

"I'm going back inside before either of you says something worse."

Haley grinned.

"Too late."

Claire pointed at both of them as she walked toward the door.

"I raised monsters."

Haley waited until her mother stepped inside, then looked up at Gael with a smaller smile.

"She's never surviving this story."

"No," Gael said, watching Claire immediately swat Phil with the dish towel through the glass. "She really isn't."