REND: Prior Cycle (Old Version)

First order of business. Gets the sheets washed.

“Can I trust you with those?” I asked Deen while rummaging through my cabinet for fresh linens. “Or I’ll wash them as always?”

She stood by the doorway, hugging the bundled-up sheets that I had yanked off the bed. “What do you mean by that? Don’t you think I know how to operate a washing machine? May I inform you that we have one at our place?”

“So… do you use it?”

“Not really. We call laundry services. To be accurate, my sister has her clothes laundered, so I send mine along. It’ll be a waste of time if I wash my clothes, given that the other option is readily available.

“Do you admit that you don’t know how to operate a washing machine?”

Deen rolled her eyes. “It’s so easy to use. Even a kid can operate it.” She stomped off to Mom’s room, where we kept the washing machine. A few seconds later, she came back, standing by the doorway. “Erm, Erind… So… I have this little problem.”

“You don’t know how to—”

“I can operate the washing machine. The buttons are self-explanatory. But I don’t know how to connect the pipes. Where do I get the water, and how do I drain it? Also, where’s the soap? I didn’t want to rummage through the cabinets to find it.”

“Are you going to ask for my help or not?”

Deen frowned. “I don’t want to admit defeat. Why don’t I bring this to the laundry shop, like we always do? It’s only a block away, and I’ll pick it up tomorrow.”

“Deen, there’s a reason why I wash the sheets after we have sex on them. Do you know why? Do you really want to have other people wash them?”

Her eyes widened as realization hit her. “Oh, you’re right!” She did a little bow. “I am respectfully asking my girlfriend to teach me how to operate the washing machine. Just teach me. I’ll do the washing so that I can do it again next time.”

“Next time, huh? You plan for more messy stuff in the future?”

Deen grinned. “Of course.”

The washing machine was outside Mom’s bathroom—the bathroom wasn’t big enough to fit it inside. I taught Deen how to connect the hoses. One for the water, and another for drainage. She made exaggerated ‘ooohs’ and ‘aaahs’ while I explained things.

“This is how far technology has gone?” Deen gasped, covering her mouth. “You’re so reliable, Erind.”

“Cut it out,” I said, thrusting the box of detergent into her hands. “I know you’re making fun of me. Once you start the cycle, you can move on to sweeping the floor, okay? Mop it afterwards. If you mop beforehand, you’ll just spread streaks of dirt.”

I was about to go back to my room when Deen grabbed my hand. She smiled. “Do you like ordering me as if I’m your servant?”

“Deen, that wasn’t a bit for anything. Unless you want to be ordered around? Like, you can wear a maid outfit and all that.”

“Actually, after our sister plays, I’ve been thinking of buying costumes.”

I closed my eyes and exhaled. She really was hopeless. But she was mine. I opened my eyes, held her hand holding my arm, and pulled her towards me. I stood on tiptoes as I kissed her. “Sure, we’ll do that stuff. As long as I’m the master and you’re the maid.”

“No fair,” Deen said. “I also want you to be my maid. We should take turns for everything to be equal.”

“It’s always transactional with you, isn’t it? Whatever. Start washing the sheets. And don’t flood Mom’s room!”

Back in my room, I spritzed the bare bed with fabric spray. I also opened the windows to air things out. I fitted a clean bed cover in record time. I also fixed the stuff on the table, both Deen's and mine. It was more of Deen’s beauty products that I dared not touch. She had offered them to me, but I’d rather not use them. I was quite fine with being plain, thank you very much.

I leaned through the doorway of Mom’s room. Deen wasn’t in view, but I could hear her mumbling. She must be having a really difficult time with the washing machine. Suddenly, a mechanical hum started.

“I did it!” Deen rushed from the bathroom and almost ran into me. “Oh, you’re here. I did it! I did—”

“You did normal people stuff,” I said, pinching her nose. “Congratulations, Your Majesty. Now, if you can sweep the floor. The broom and the dustpan are—”

“I know where they are. And no, you don’t need to teach me how to use them. I sweep the floor at my house sometimes—you’ve seen me do it.”

“If there’s even a speck of dust left on the floor, we’re not going to have sex ever again.”

“What!” Deen’s face looked like she had learned there was a Purple Bloom in the city.

“Just kidding.” I stuck out my tongue at her. “I’m not going to be toxic and hold out sex on you. That’s your job to be toxic.”

“I’m very good at it.”

“That’s… not something you should be proud of. Anyway, I’ll clean my bathroom. See you in a bit.”

“Our bathroom, you mean?”

“See you in a bit,” I repeated, poking her breast before shooing her away.

Since my bathroom was small, I finished in around twenty minutes. Everything looked so clean that I could eat food off the tiles. Was that the correct expression? Not that I’d actually put any food here.

I went outside to check if the living room was on fire. “Wow, the tiles are super shiny,” I said, carefully stepping on the floor.

Deen leaned on the handle of the mop, a prideful expression on her face. “Don’t smudge the floor, please.”

“And you also moved the furniture? Talk about thorough. I’m impressed.”

“You should be. I’m quite impressed with myself, actually. I’m warming up to the idea of wearing a maid outfit while cleaning our condo.”

I didn’t bite her bait. “If you’re going to order costumes, do note the sizes, okay?” I was actually fine with roleplaying; that was my thing. The problem was Deen not sticking to the script. “We can’t exactly use each other’s outfits.”

“You’re more accepting of the idea than I had assumed,” Deen said. She raised a finger. “Hear me out on this. Since I’ll be ordering costumes for… our plays. What if I also bought toys?”

I jolted. “Toys?”

“Sex toys. You know about those, don’t you? For example—”

“I know what they are! I’m just surprised by your suggestion.”

“I had that thought while using your Pino body parts for my pleasure.”

I groaned. “You really should work on structuring your sentences to not sound like a creep.”

“What’s wrong with toys?” Deen asked. “Be open to trying new things. There’s a lot of fun to be had.”

“And once the fun runs out, you’ll get tired of me. It’s like those celeb marriages that mostly end in divorce after a few years.”

“Oh, Erind,” Deen said, shaking her head. “Don’t compare us to those relationships. I’ve noticed that you keep bringing this up. Are you worried that I’ll leave you someday?”

“No…” I blinked. Deen was right. I had mentioned this a few times already.

I wasn’t concerned that she’d leave me, was I? Our relationship was fun, but it was nothing to me if it ended. I’d return to my original life and enjoy the things I had given up for this relationship. For one, I’d have my privacy and peace back. I wasn’t going to mope and be depressed about it. Right…?

“I’m not going to leave you.” Deen gave me a big smile. “I can see it in your face that you care for me.”

“Whatever!” I stomped away to clean Mom’s room.