-1: 35
"What?" I blinked, feeling my ears burn. "It's true. And I've tried changing her mind. I DEFINITELY can't at this rate, so I've just decided to accept that fact and adjust accordingly."
"...I take it back. You're definitely a terrible person." Anis let out a teasing smile and poked my cheek. "Our dear commander, stealing women's hearts left and right... Not even bothering to pretend to play it cool when a woman throws herself at him... You DO know this is going to cause issues later, right?"
"Hm? How so?" I looked at Anis, completely serious. "Explain."
"Huh." Anis noticed my serious gaze and then nodded. Letting go of me, she straightened and composed herself before saying, "Well... since you're being serious about it, I guess I'll explain. You know how Nikke are treated, right?"
"In exhaustive detail at this point, yes."
"Well." Anis frowned. "...It's pretty much like that even with unique Nikke like us. I mean, it's worse with mass-produced Nikke like Nami, Suri, and Hana. But even people like us... Most Commanders still see us as disposable. And the Big Three won't hesitate to resort to mindwipes if there's too much hassle with a Nikke. Oh, Boss is an exception though." She chuckled and said, "He's always had a soft spot. Though that's probably because of what happened between him and..." She trailed off and shook her head. "Well, if you want THAT story, you should get it from him. Not mine to tell. Well, not COMPLETELY mine to tell, anyway."
"Hm... Oh. I see." I rubbed my chin. "So it's like that, huh? Since the standard is literally in hell, and since I'm actually a decent guy..."
"Don't be surprised if Nikke throw themselves at you, yeah." Anis paused and gave me a fierce side-eye. "...If you still accept anyone after us though..."
"Well, you're the gatekeepers. I'll delegate to you, Mari, and Rapi for a group decision on that."
Anis gave me a blank look. "...You're definitely a man, huh? You know, a gentleman would at least pretend to console me and say things like 'I would never do that!'"
I shrugged and said, "I'm just being honest. While decisive and loyal, I am also quite a shallow man, you know? While I'll defer to you girls since I chose you, my instinct is always going to be to say yes to women who are willing to devote themselves to me."
"...Neon was right. Your type is just women who throw themselves at your feet, huh?"
"Now I didn't say THAT."
Anis raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? Then what IS your type, huh? Tell it to me straight, Commander. Is it a 'big personality?' Charming 'assets?' Or-"
"My type of women is a woman who I feel at peace around. Like you, Rapi, Mari, and Endless." I paused. "Though with Endless it's more because I know that she's choosing me unconditionally. It's definitely a toxic relationship, but at this point, I'm not sure I can fix it, so it is what it is."
"...You ALMOST saved that. But you just HAD to ruin it by admitting that..." Anis giggled. "Well. You wouldn't be you without that. Or this armor." She reached out and lightly tapped the plate mail I was still wearing. "You really going out on a date with me wearing this? I mean, I don't mind, but you're definitely going to stand out. Like, there's ZERO subtlety going on here."
"Function over form, Anis. Also..." I lightly rested my left hand over the hilt of the sword sheathed on my left side. "...Suffice to say, with our recent accolades, I'm quite paranoid about things."
While I was on the good side of both Enikk and Deputy Chief Andersen, I was also keenly aware that I was NOT on the good side of Syuen.
The fact that the Missilis CEO had been quiet despite me threatening her directly was disconcerting. And I never did find out why she showed up to the Outpost that day...
Anis gave me a blank stare. Then she sighed. "You are WEIRDLY competent, you know? It's like... if you were a video game character, your stats are all messed up. Like a kid who wanted to make an OP character and then forgot that he still needed to play nice with ordinary people."
"Huh?"
"...Never mind." Anis sighed. "It's a lost cause..." She glanced at the elevator lights and then teased me. "Well, Commander. It's just you, me, and this cramped elevator for the next ten minutes or so..." A blush filled her face and she said, "Do you... wanna do anything? I-I mean... you don't have to... Oh god, is this too strong? I don't know how to do this..."
I chuckled and said, "Let's take it slow, Anis. There's no rush."
Anis paused. Then she let out a slow breath. "Right. That's true. It's not like you're going to ditch us any time soon. And it's not like anyone can take us away from you either... if they tried, you and Endless would raze the place to ash."
"Yep." I nodded. "Definitely would."
"Well then... How about this. Tell me about you, Commander. Like... what's the REAL reason behind your name? You can't seriously be telling me Hoopa is ACTUALLY your name. Or that the acronym is legit."
I shrugged. "Dunno what to tell you, Anis. That's all I remember. If I had another name, I don't remember what it is at this point."
That wasn't a lie either.
Honestly, I didn't remember much about Earth anymore or my life there.
I vaguely remembered that I was living an ordinary life. But really, most of what I remembered was just semantic knowledge without any episodic memories attached to them.
General know-how, not actual experiences, if that made sense.
"Huh?" Anis blinked. "Wait, you're serious about that? It's not a bit or an excuse? You actually don't remember much before your first mission?"
"Mmhm. It's all blank. I remember that I was born on the Ark... probably. And that I did decent in the academy. But that's about it."
"...Okay. I keep saying it. But this time I really mean it." Anis gave me a concerned look. "...Are you sure you aren't a Missilis sleeper agent or something? Or even someone from the V.T.C. who got like mind-wiped? It would explain why Syuen casually showed up that day, wouldn't it?"
"Mm..." I rubbed my chin. "That's a possibility. But even if it's true, I'm still definitely human. They confirmed that in my checkup. So at the end of the day, it doesn't really matter, right?"
Anis stared at me, still worried. "Doesn't that bother you? Either you got your mind wiped... your memories and entire life. Or you were literally created not long before your first mission. Even if- No, ESPECIALLY if you're human... isn't that terrifying?"
"Not particularly." I smiled. "Whatever the past may be, it's no longer real. The future is an illusion too. Only the 'now' really exists. And the 'now' is built up of the choices that I make. And I'm sure. There's a 'core' that is me. Even if I lost all my memories, I would make the same choices."
I didn't believe in a soul necessarily, but I DID believe in volition. The ability to choose, the will itself that could persist across time, form, and memory.
That would always be the same.
I looked into Anis's golden eyes and said, "No matter how many times the clock spun backwards, I would only ever walk one path. That's just who I am."
"...You sound so certain about that, Commander. What if things were different, huh? What if you had met someone else first that day? Like me or Rapi?"
"Then that wouldn't be me. Just like that wouldn't be 'you' who I met. Not really." I smiled at her. "There is only ever one 'you,' Anis. There might be people who get close. There might be copycats. But the 'you' who chooses is unique. And the 'you' who chooses is changing with every passing moment. The you from yesterday isn't the same as the you from today, is it?"
Anis blinked. Then she scoffed, nudging my arm. "Always such a philosophizer, Commander."
"Well." I chuckled. "It's how I saved Marian. And it's how I'm certain none of you will be forced to follow orders you don't want. So I think I'll take my tendency to hop on a soapbox if that's the payoff."
Anis rolled her eyes.
At that time, the elevator doors opened.
I held out my arm for her and said, "Well then, Anis. I'm all yours today, Love. Shall we go on a proper date?"
"L-L-Love? Just like that?!" Anis's face turned a bright red. "Without any warning?!"
"Ah, there's the reaction I wanted."
"Gr...! You...! Hmph!" Anis wrapped her arm around me and said, "You're buying me sooooo much stuff today."
"My wallet and body is ready."
"WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU SAYING?!"
I burst out laughing.
Anis huffed and then started marching me through the elevator doors. "Whatever! We're going shopping first, then getting food, and YOU'RE carrying me home!" She looked at me and said, "No saying I'm too heavy now when you lifted me before, got it?"
"I mean, you HAVE been eating a lot recently though so- OWOWOWO. Domestic Abuse! Stoppu!"
"Oh shut up, you." Anis turned a bright red. "Come on already."