Collecting
By the time Ellen joined us back in Xander's--and now also Max's-- room, the three of us had already settled in with our snacks. Xander had placed a thermos in the middle of a ring of cards and had refused to elaborate.
"Hey girls…" Ellen eased herself down next to me.
"Hey, welcome back. Everything okay?" I rubbed her back but she didn't seem comforted.
"So I talked to Carolyn."
I froze. "Why." I didn't phrase it like a question, but I still demanded an answer.
"I was concerned. And uh… I mean it's fine, everything is fine. I should say that first, but it might be good for you to chat with her sooner than later."
"Ellennnn." I groaned and stood up. "Fine. It's probably an okay time to extract anyways… I guess." I took another sip of my drink before handing it off to Ellen.
"Should we wait to start, or do you think it will be a while?" Xander asked.
"Uh, go on without me. I'll pick up the rules and such when I get back."
There was a chorus of understanding and sympathetic responses as I returned to the balcony/hallway and headed toward the bedroom. Sure enough, Carolyn was waiting, leaning back on her hands with her knees crossed. She had fully dispensed with the clinic outfit this time and my eyes were drawn to the patches of scaly skin on her abdomen and thighs, somehow tantalizing despite the loose cropped tank top and shorts being so ordinary. They just weren't so ordinary on her.
"I uh… Ellen said-- I figured I should…" I trailed off as I ran out of breath with non-starters for excuses.
"Don't worry, pet." Carolyn smiled easily. "Come, sit."
She patted the bed next to her, so I resisted the urge to kneel at her feet just for the bit. If I was right about what Ellen had been up to, this was not the time for bits.
"I'm sorry about Ellen." I winced as I realized too late the apology I wasn't supposed to make, but I pressed on. "I promise I didn't ask her to talk to you."
"I know." Carolyn's cool response gave me nothing to work with, but I took encouragement from her arm wrapping around me.
"She told me that she told you… uh… she said I was upset I guess? But I wasn't."
"Mhmm," Carolyn smiled. "She said you'd say that she told you she told me that."
"What?" I tried to parse the sentence and quickly gave up. "No she fucking didn't."
"True." Carolyn sighed wistfully and laid back.
I wanted so desperately to snuggle up to her like I would in the evenings, but that seemed like yet another sure-fire way to derail my plans here.
"You know… I'm manipulative, right?" Carolyn said to the ceiling.
"I wouldn't say that."
Carolyn chuckled. "Of course you wouldn't but I fit pretty much every definition all the same."
"But you aren't… evil about it?"
"And that makes it okay?"
"I think so."
Carolyn shook her head. "Regardless… Ellen proposed that there should be some checks and balances as it were. She has some real stones you know? Busted in here demanding that I stop abusing you or she'd raise all sorts of hell."
"Damn it~" I groaned. "I thought you two would get along."
"Oh, we do." Carolyn rolled onto her side and scooted toward the center of the bed. She was holding her arms out now so I wagered a little snuggling wouldn't hurt.
"That's… good? How did you talk it all out?"
"She ran out of steam pretty quickly, and even as she was calling me out she was making devil's advocate arguments against herself. It was rather cute honestly, before long I was really just listening to her info dump her whole ideology."
"Ellennnn." I grumbled under my breath.
"Do you know how attuned she is to you?"
"She certainly gets on my ass about my feelings enough."
"But do you know what else she has kept track of? I tasked her, on a whim, with looking after you. I joked that it would be a test of her abilities and if you think I'm a psycho you should see the dossier she has on you."
"Dossier?"
"Write up, profile, whatever. She has meticulously tracked your feeding, exercising, and sleeping habits along with your general mood and health-- well, it's more that she put together a very professional looking report, I don't know exactly how she's keeping up with all the data."
"Uh huh. Just for little ol me? None of the other residents?"
"Eh. She's a sparkling socialite, but I didn't ask for reports on anyone else.-- could probably do one for Max, if that is his real name."
"It's she/her now, or rather she says anything is fine but she has a pretty clear preference. Sorry, I guess I shouldn't correct you when he/him is still correct."
"No, no. No problem. Good to know." Carolyn looked past me for a moment before pulling me to her chest and humming.
I rubbed her back as had become my habit and enjoyed the touch Carolyn dispensed in turn.
I realized, probably mid sentence that Carolyn was taking again and it felt like a real conscious effort was required to focus back in again.
"-- our sakes, honestly. We just need to work on staying out of crisis mode, and Ellen is really good at picking up on that."
I took my time trying to fill in the blanks of what I'd missed. It was probably important.
"I'm not having a crisis. I'm happy here."
"Mmm. And I'm glad to hear you say that, but I still think you should be more aware of the ways I mess with you."
"I'm pretty aware. You've been stern with me whenever I've been-I don't know- fussy? And you're training me to apologize less."
"I'm not, actually."
I pulled back and squinted at her. "Is this a test to see if I can tell when I'm being gaslit?"
"No, like actually if I wanted you to stop then I'd cultivate shame. Like, with the online shopping thing, Ellen says I was a bit heavy handed, but the result was pretty clear right?"
"Yeah. I cancelled the orders and started a return."
"Right, I really pressed on your need to be liked to get what I wanted."
"And when I say sorry, you bite me."
"But you don't hate being bitten, do you?"
"I-- uh…"
"I don't punish you for apologizing, I press your little buttons and give you attention and touch. That's reinforcement. Even if you don't explicitly like being bitten I know for a fact that absolutely nothing has clicked into place to make you apologize less. If anything, you're developing a habit of noticing and telling me just to be sure that I do something about it."
"It never was a results oriented program…" I echoed the remark she had made to Ellen weeks ago. "I can't believe this--"
"I'm sorry that you had to find out this way."
"Maybe I will start biting back, see how you like it."
"I think you know how that will end." Carolyn tugged at the hem of my shirt. "You know, Ellen also told me it's about the time you would usually do an extraction. She even seemed to think that you might be rather full right now."
"Oh, yeah I was going to go bottle up your Irish cream after this."
"How much did you drink?"
"So I didn't keep super close track, but I poured like eight ounces of rum per time I filled my cup and had the chance to drink maybe one full solo cup worth between Ellen stealing sips sooo… I'll go with eight?"
"Are you feeling buzzed?"
"No actually, should I be?"
"Mmmm maybe if you didn't have some heavily modded organs aggressively filtering your blood."
"Then my diet probably has a huge impact on how my milk tastes… should I be recording what I've eaten recently on the bottles?"
Carolyn laughed. "I can see it now, posh labels saying there's notes of caramel and licorice or that it pairs with butterscotch cookies in particular."
"I feel like I have to say that I hate that so much."
"You have to say it? What, do you not mean it?"
"Part of it is that I know that's a batshit marketing strategy for our milk and I still feel like it doesn't really affect me all that much, you know?"
"Mmm," Carolyn tugged at my shirt more insistently now. "I'm glad that you aren't stressing that. Now, what do you say to giving me my cream now?"
I laughed as she crawled on top of me and started dragging my shirt up and off. "Can't even wait for it to be bottled?"
"It would be a waste." Carolyn lay back down beside me, pulling me into the familiar position to cradle her head as she fed. "Besides, I'm thirsty."
"You always are~ah!" I flinched as her teeth grazed my areola this time. She was pulling so much of my breast into her mouth now and she kneaded and squeezed with her hands as if she was in a real hurry.
I'd grown somewhat used to the sensations of feeding her, but today there was a new very sharp stinging sensation. Normally, were it not for the other sensations, it would have just been straight pain, like a UTI on my tits or something. But with her mouth, and all the other touch… it was pushing the whole activity firmly into the erotic pain zone. Lactating alcohol had to be the strangest mix of pain and pleasure I'd felt yet, and I had to hope there wouldn't be any lasting discomfort.
Carolyn hummed as she drank, occasionally looking up to meet my eye as she breathed out through her nose. It was hard not to squirm, and I'd long since lost the battle for composure. It wasn't unusual for feeding Carolyn to wind me up a bit but now it was basically sex already.
I was soaked, and when Carolyn made no move to pause, I took matters into my own hands. Unfortunately, I'd scarcely slipped my fingers under my own waistband before Carolyn noticed.
"No." She practically growled, and she was up on her knees, pulling my panties and sleep pants out of the way before slipping her knee between my thighs and working her fingers into me.
I cried out and gasped as she resumed feeding, pairing the stinging suction with firm pressure between my legs. The delight of being consumed and used was inescapable, so I let myself bask.
I couldn't relax of course, but I let my twitching and moaning feed Carolyn's predatory predilections, just as my milk was feeding her in the more literal sense. I rolled my hips into her, matching the pressure of her fingers so deep inside me. Unfortunately, this threw her off balance and my breast was tugged free of her mouth as she sat up to resituate.
I caught my breath and whined as she knelt above me, wiping her mouth and fingers with my discarded shirt.
"Good girl." she cooed. "Now let's get you out of the rest of those pesky clothes so that we can get you fully emptied."
I nodded and sat up to get the tangle of sleep pants, panties and socks out of the way. Being naked used to be different, it used to be something that only happened immediately before showering, with the lights off as often as not. Now, It was more of an occasion. It almost seemed like I spent more time naked in the company of Deyha and Carolyn than I did alone.
I hummed and sat with my hands splayed out on the cushion between my knees as Carolyn ran her fingers through my hair. This pose always seemed to delight her and right on cue she began massaging both of my ears, rolling the fuzzy skin under the pads of her thumbs as I let my eyes drift closed.
"Oh, you're so precious." Carolyn squeezed my cheeks and pulled me toward her for a kiss. "You know~" her tone took on a salacious quality "It seems only fair that I help replenish all these fluids that you're losing."
"It's fine." I half-mumbled "There's plenty to drink at Xander's place."
"Who said anything about drinking?"
I nearly fell forward as Carolyn hopped off the bed and went to rummage in the closet.
"Should I be worried?" I called after her, but Carolyn just giggled.
A minute or two later she returned with a large white bottle. She'd dispensed with the casual clothes and at first I thought she had just taken all that time putting her clothes away before I noticed the new equipment on her pelvis. The straps and silicon both nearly perfectly matched her skin tone, and as she climbed up on the bed I recognized the sorts of textures and features I'd only seen in one place.
"You know," Carolyn mused. "It's kinda weird that it took me this long to shop at this store. I mean, it's in the name. 'Bad dragon'. I've never been more specifically marketed to."
She connected a long tube, the sort we used for our milking harnesses, from the dildo to the bottle through a familiar pump mechanism. I had to commend her resourcefulness in adapting one of the battery operated milk pumps for this.
"Now." Carolyn tossed the bottle and pump down on the bed beside me. "I'm going to fuck you until that bottle is empty or you beg me to stop, whichever comes last."
"Don't you mean whichever comes first?"
She shook her head. "You control the pump, Dear."
I turned it on and watched the familiar white cum-lube flow down through the tube to Carolyn's strap. In no time it was dribbling from the tip and Caronlyn chuckled as I scrambled to shut the pump back off.
"The whole bottle?" I spread the lube I'd caught over the dildo, this one had way more texture than the horse cock model I'd bought so long ago.
"Mhmm." She held my un-bitten shoulder and pushed to get me to lay back. "I have the sadistic desire for you to spend the rest of your evening leaking my cum."
"Wait, so I can't even shower after this? It's going to be so gross!"
"I'll clean you up, don't you worry."
I didn't know what to do with my hands as she situated herself between my legs and lined up the tip. This was smaller than the horse cock, so I wasn't terribly worried about it fitting or not, but already that full feeling was such a distant memory.
"Does all of that sound okay to you, pet?" Carolyn still hadn't pressed in and I relaxed my hips as she held herself above me.
"I… yeah… that's fine."
"Just fine?" she moved as if to sit up but I caught her arms, holding her in place.
"Look, I don't just love the idea of going about my evening with a litre, or whatever I can hold, of cumlube… but I do want to spend time with you and… I mean… as long as you call me your good girl and pet me a bunch I'll probably go along with anything."
"Hmmm." Carolyn was finally pressing in now. "I felt certain my good little cow would love being filled up, and after all the effort I've gone to to nurture exhibitionism I was sure that she would get all blushy about leaking my sticky mess while having innocent play time with all her friends."
I whined as she eased in, curling me up beneath her as she gradually put more and more weight behind the toy.
"--But if that doesn't interest you I guess I'll just disconnect this cum lube bottle and--"
Before she could make good on her threat, I reached around blindly for the little pump.
"Good girl~" she cooed as she lowered herself onto her elbows above me.
The way her skin rubbed against my belly and breasts caused my core to tighten, clamping down uncomfortably on the bumpy silicon she had buried so deep inside me, but Carolyn didn't seem to care.
She rolled her hips into me, spreading my knees further as she pressed as deep as she could. It wasn't hard to imagine the lube pumping into me, coating my insides.
I gasped and cried out again as she thrust. The pump was making strange noises as she moved, as if it was struggling to keep up whenever she was pressing in, but nothing seemed to be leaking past the dildo. At least not yet.
I focused on relaxing under her, willing myself to be a puddle as she rocked against me and forced me down into the bed. I'd swear I could feel the lube leaking through my cervix now.
My breathing came out in frenzied puffs now. My body seemed utterly convinced it was getting bred right now, and the feeling of touch with someone I loved so much was overloading my senses with happy little chemicals. I could do nothing but hold on for the ride as Carolyn played around with different angles and methods with which to thrust into me.
My favorite was when she wrapped her arms around me, pulling me in time with her movements to meet every thrust, but just when I thought she had finally gotten into her rhythm she was lifting herself off of me, utterly unmoved by my weak efforts to hold onto her a bit longer.
"That's half the bottle." Carolyn sat up and pulled the rest of the way out. "Oooooh I wish I had a camera ready for that. What a gorgeous glob of cum that was." I turned the pump off and lay back to catch my breath.
I felt dizzy and drunk all over again from the near-hyperventilating and I let my head sway as the pins and needles bloomed and faded across my skin. I hated edging, but everyone else seemed to be woefully proficient in subjecting me to it anyways.
I wrinkled my nose as the cum lube oozed and dribbled out of me onto the bedspread.
"Carolyn~" I whined. "Why do you always say weird things?"
"It amuses me." She scooped the fluid up with her fingers and pressed into me as if trying to cause the 'blob' to happen again. "Well. ready for the second half of the bottle?"
I kicked at the sheets and pushed her hand away. "Can't we save it for later?"
"I can assure you, we're never going to run out."
"How much did you buy‽"
"Theres only one other bottle, but I must confess I quite like covering you in the stuff so I intend to always have some on hand."
"Right. Of course." I propped myself up on my elbows to survey the damage. The "stuff" was continuing to trickle out of me and I was sitting in a puddle now. "I really ought to shower after this."
"I said I'd clean you up." Carolyn scooped up what she could with both hands and poured it on my stomach and pelvis.
"Carolyn~" I whined but she was already moving her hands further upward, smearing my chest as she lined her dildo up again and pushed in.
Now I was basically her slip and slide, and the lube quickly covered both of our chests as she lay down and hugged me.
"Hah~" I gasped as she resumed her earlier pace, adding a wet squelch to the slaps and squeaks as she fucked me.
As much as I expected the mess to be a turn off, it wasn't enough to take me out of the moment. The sensation of being filled and held was enough on its own, and I relaxed into the building chorus of sensation as she wasted no time in working me up all over again.
"Someday--" Carolyn spoke between thrusts, her voice strained by the effort, "Deyha is going to do this to you and you'll end up pregnant. Won't that be nice?"
I nodded, but words of agreement escaped me.
"And you'll be such a good girl. Panting and moaning as we put our baby in you, the first of many, I'd wager."
"Carolyn~"
"What?" she slowed her pace and sought out my hands, weaving our fingers together as she dragged her body against mine at a more leisurely pace. "Is that one of those 'weird things' you don't want me to say?"
I shook my head.
"Then I don't see the problem, pet. Now, be a good girl and lie still as I practice filling you up with baby batter."
I wanted to tell her that calling it 'baby batter' was one of the weird things, but she seemed determined to prevent me from speaking further. There was nothing I could do but twitch and moan as the artificial cum pumped into me. The talk about babies and being pregnant didn't help either, so I felt like I was once again being tested to see how many of my buttons could be pressed at once. Carolyn had to be sitting on the entire proverbial keyboard at this point, right?
My panting and crying became more like screams as she maintained pressure in all the right places. I tried to tap out, but evidently Carolyn wasn't getting the message because she didn't ease up at all.
"Carolyn~" I gasped.
"Maddie~" Carolyn mocked the wavering of my voice. "The bottle isn't empty yet, dear."
She stopped anyway, resting all her weight behind her hips as she propped herself up on one arm to check the bottle.
"It has to be, I can't take any more." I arched my back, enjoying-- despite everything-- the way the dildo pressed and moved inside me.
"Oh, my bad, it is empty. And I suppose you're all done too?"
I nodded. She began to pull out but I hugged her, causing her to fall back onto me with a grunt.
"Which is it, Maddie? Are we done or not?"
"I just… don't you want a video of the blob or something?"
Carolyn chuckled. "I don't have my phone handy."
"Mine is in the pocket of my sleep pants."
I eased my grip and she leaned to the side to grab my phone. I held out my hand for her to give it to me but she ignored me, swiping at the screen for a moment before holding it sideways.
"Isn't it locked?"
She shrugged. "It was."
"You know my passcode?"
"It's not like you are subtle about typing it in."
"But I use my fingerprint!"
Carolyn smirked now, setting the phone aside to lay back into me. "You know, if you fail the fingerprint login enough times it requires the passcode to open…"
"You didn't…"
She shrugged. "You can add my fingerprint if you want."
"That's not the issue!"
She seemed to study my face for a moment before sitting up again. She hadn't reached for the phone so I was surprised when she pulled out with no further preamble, she didn't even seem to pay all that much attention to the ooze that had so amused her just a moment ago.
She used my sleep pants to wipe at her chest and frowned at how woefully inadequate it seemed to be for cleaning up.
"You might have been onto something with the shower…"
"Don't change the subject!" I sat up and reclaimed my phone. I was more than a little tempted to change my lock screen pattern on the spot, but I'd grown rather attached to the old one.
"Right, sorry. I realize now that the whole phone lock thing was not a cool or sexy invasion of privacy but I am also realizing how this isn't the best conversation to have in a puddle of cum lube."
"Then what do you suggest?"
"We go to the showers and I make good on my promise to clean you up."
"What am I going to wear there? Or from, for that matter. The outfit change is going to be suspicious as hell."
"You don't have to wear anything you know."
"Uh uh. I am not walking across the farm naked, and if it's not too much to ask I'd rather you didn't either."
Carolyn shrugged and nodded. "I know sticky clothes are a sensory issue for you, but do you think you'd be able to manage it?"
"I'll tough it out, sure." I shrugged and untangled my panties from my extra-soiled sleep pants. "Don't act surprised if this shortens my fuse."
Carolyn nodded. Tilted her head from side to side and then nodded again.
"What?" Already a bitter bite was slipping into my tone.
"Nothing, I was just thinking it might be worth grabbing Deyha, or Ellen if you think she would be a moderating factor."
"I… don't know." I texted Ellen that I was going to take a quick shower. "Maybe you can just manipulate me into not getting upset."
I don't know what possessed me to speak the thought aloud, but I felt a wave of dread as I found countless ways that sounded hurtful and mean.
"You don't actually believe that, do you?" Carolyn's tone was hard to place, and I didn't dare look her in the eye.
"No. I don't know. I'm just confused. Like, I'd kinda hope that maybe if I didn't want to be manipulated by you then I never would have let it happen in the first place? But nobody is immune to propaganda." I sighed. " I don't hate you. I love you actually, still, just as much, but I'm not in the position to say whether that's a testament to the health of our relationship or the skill of your influences."
"Do you need space to search those feelings out?"
"No." I nearly spoke over Carolyn. My abandonment fears had me by the throat in that respect. "No, even before I met you I was dreaming of being swept up into the life of someone with a real drive and ambition so that I could ride the coat-tails I guess, but in all my euphoria these months I hadn't really realized I got exactly what I wished for."
"But it's not what you wanted after all?"
I met Carolyn's gaze at last. "I wasn't allowed to shut my bedroom door when I was growing up. I don't even think I did anything in particular to lose the 'privilege' of privacy--" I made air quotes "--but whether or not there was any rational reason, I grew up in constant fear of secrets being unearthed."
"Did you masturbate with the door open too?"
"Jesus, Carolyn."
"That's not a no…"
"Fuck off. That's not a funny question. The door was always open because if it wasn't she would open it and I might not hear her coming. The point I'm trying to make is that privacy is a touchy subject, okay? It's really upsetting to suddenly feel like nothing ever changed."
I made a conscious effort to unclench my fists. "I don't want anything to change right now, and if having access to my phone is important to you I'm not going to refuse you, but…"
"You want to be allowed to close the door." Carolyn finished for me.
"Yeah. A little bit, I guess. Is that okay?"
Carolyn scoffed. "Is that okay? Yes, Maddie. Of course it is. I hope you can trust that I haven't just been going through your phone for shits and giggles."
"Have you been going through my phone?"
"Ah…" Carolyn seemed a little abashed. "I… can see how this may go against what I just said but I assume you have noticed some inexplicable selfies popping up in your camera reel? And me responding to texts you don't remember sending?"
"Oh." I squinted at her. "Yeah I assumed you were pranking me for leaving my phone unlocked and unattended."
"Not quite. Sorry."
I shrugged and scooted off the bed. Already the lube was feeling a little gross. "It's fine. It's funny I guess but I'd rather you didn't maybe."
"Yeah, that's totally fine. It was only ever going to be fun if it was fun for everyone, after all. Are you going to change your pattern then?"
I shrugged. "Probably not. Besides, it is good to know that someone can get into my phone if anything happens to me."
Carolyn took a deep breath and sighed.
"What?" I pulled on my panties and made a point not to look or think about how they felt. "Too dark?"
"No, I suppose not. I just… I don't like that you so easily jump to thinking 'what if I die' or something. It's cool that you want to be prepared for everything but that has to be a pretty depressing line of thought, right?"
I shrugged. "I don't dwell on it." My phone buzzed and I made sure my hands weren't sticky before checking my messages. "Ellen is going to meet us at the showers."
"Good, and cool I guess. If you want to go ahead then I'll collect a change of clothes and take the bedding to the wash."
"Mkay." I pulled my robe on and caught Carolyn in a hug to get a quick kiss. "Love you."
She chuckled and kissed my forehead too. "I love you too, pet. See you in a bit."