Chapter 81
It had been way too long since I’d gotten into a good brawl. There was just something thrilling about punching the crap out of another guy while chaos unfolded around you.
Although this was definitely a step up from brawling in Gotham’s back alleys.
My fist smashed into Desaad’s face with a satisfying crack, the buffs from my potions making every punch hit like a truck.
Despite his fragile-looking appearance, Desaad’s body was freaking tough. Hell, I was pretty sure most metas back home would’ve been reduced to mush by now.
Though honestly, that might’ve been the preferable outcome for him.
Desaad looked like a fucked-up mascot at this point, his body covered in a riot of different colors. I’d tossed probably hundreds of different potions at the bastard. Acids, poisons, explosives, you name it.
Still, even after all that, Desaad struggled back to his feet, his eyes burning with hatred as he stared at me.
I glanced toward Darkseid.
He still hadn’t said anything, so... guess I had to wail on Desaad some more.
I hadn’t summoned Simmy or my Gargoyles in case that somehow broke his “rules.” Fumofication would probably win this fight pretty handily too, but the moment I slotted the ability, I could already feel the problem. Keeping both him and Klarion trapped would burn through the timer way too quickly, and I really didn’t want to risk letting the Chaos Lord loose.
That took two options off the table.
Luckily, I still had a couple left.
I wondered how well Desaad could endure a thunder strike.
Laughter suddenly filled the hall.
Desaad was bent over, the sounds coming from him growing increasingly deranged.
“ENOUGH!” His head snapped up. “You will perish for your disrespect, no matter the price!”
He pulled out a strange red box and slammed it against his arm.
Red tendrils erupted from the object and plunged straight into his flesh. They spread beneath his skin almost instantly, pulsing as his arm began to twist and transform.
Desaad screamed as the limb writhed, red energy crackling violently around him.
Cool and all, but transforming wasn’t a free action.
I hurled the Inverted Spear of Heaven straight at his head as more potions appeared in my hands and I charged at him.
Unlike the previous barriers, though, the blade failed to dispel the crackling aura surrounding Desaad.
With a deafening bang, the Inverted Spear of Heaven was knocked aside. It clattered across the floor before snapping back into my hand.
Well, shit.
It could only dispel effects of Epic rank and below, which meant...
A tremendous boom shook the throne room as the transformation finished, a wave of air exploding outward.
Desaad’s arm had completely changed.
The limb had swollen into a grotesque mass nearly as large as his torso, red veins pulsing across warped flesh surrounding what looked like the barrel of some enormous organic cannon. Crimson energy gathered inside the opening, growing brighter by the second.
“DIE!”
The barrel whipped toward me.
Then a wall of black energy swallowed everything in sight.
—
Desaad stared across the throne room at the smoking ruin where the insolent mortal had once stood.
A gigantic hole had been blasted straight through the wall, the path of destruction stretching far beyond even his sight and cutting across the lands of Apokolips. The beam of antimatter had been even more potent than theorized.
“Ha... hahaha... hahahaha!”
Pure joy surged through Desaad at the insolent bug’s demise. Even as the limb he had integrated with the Father Box burned with agonizing pain, it was nothing compared to his satisfaction.
Nothing could have survived that attack.
“Disappointing.”
Lord Darkseid’s voice boomed through the chamber.
For a brief moment, anger flared within Desaad. Was his lord actually pitying that insolent wretch’s death?
Then the truth dawned on him.
Of course.
Lord Darkseid was merely disappointed that it had taken Desaad this long to defeat a mere mortal.
Desaad turned toward his master, already preparing to apologize.
“Finish this charade,” Darkseid commanded. “I tire of watching this failure.”
“Of course, Lord Darkseid.”
A smug voice came from behind him.
No... that was impossible.
A soot-covered stone slowly shifted aside, revealing the insolent mortal standing behind it without so much as a scratch.
“...How?” Desaad stumbled backward. “How are you alive?! That beam could have shattered worlds!”
“Rock.”
Desaad gaped.
“A rock?”
The mortal patted the blackened stone beside him. “A very good rock.”
Desaad could only stare at what should have been sheer madness.
No. It did not matter. He could simply fire again and—
Smoke and tiny sparks sputtered from his arm.
Desaad looked down just as the Father Box began sloughing away from his flesh, sending another spike of agony through him.
“No... no!”
Had the integration been overcharged?
It did not matter. He could still—
“Hey.”
Desaad flinched and looked back.
The mortal was standing there with the rock raised over his head.
“Wait!” Desaad shuffled backward.
The mortal stepped closer, his grin only growing wider.
“Run.”
“Ah... ah... AHHHHH!”
Desaad turned and tried to flee, but his battered body was too weakened to carry him far.
“Lord Darkseid, save—”
The world went black.
—
I stared at the blood pooling out from beneath The Rock, honestly surprised it had actually killed him.
Had that weird gun thing fucked with his powers somehow?
Ah well. Killing someone Looney Tunes-style had never exactly been on my checklist, but damn if it wasn’t satisfying.
I quickly returned The Rock to my inventory.
King Arthur should’ve just said fuck the sword and grabbed the stone instead.
“A fitting death for a failure.” Darkseid glared down at the corpse with open contempt. “Be honored, for now you are the right hand of Darkseid.”
[Feat Achieved! Crushing the Competition!]
[+1 Diamond Ticket]
Oh, fuck yeah!
I had to fight back a smile as I bowed to Darkseid.
“I’m moved to be granted such a position. You shall find me the best advisor for the role.”
The best backstabbing kind, of course.
“As it should be,” Darkseid said. “Your mortal nature makes you ill-suited to serve as steward of Apokolips. Granny Goodness will assume that duty and serve as your fellow agent. As for you, I have your first task.”
“Anything, Lord Darkseid.”
“Prepare Earth for my conquest,” Darkseid ordered. “There are forces upon your planet that deny my rightful rule.”
“Your will shall be done.” I bowed again.
Probably gonna need to give the Justice League a heads-up about this guy.
And, uh... my new employment.
“As all will be,” Darkseid said coldly. “Do not fail me as Desaad did.”
“Of course.”
A yellow portal flared into existence beneath me.
Then I dropped straight through.
I stumbled slightly when I landed, blinking in surprise as I found myself back on the hundredth-floor suite.
Ha.
I did it.
Fuck you, Darkseid!
I almost ripped out the Diamond Ticket right then and there before remembering something slightly more important.
I spun around and let out a relieved breath when I saw Bruce and Clark had fallen through the portal with me.
“...Crazy night, huh?” I chuckled awkwardly.
Both of them just stared at me with far-off looks.
Okay, totally fair.
A familiar song brushed against my ears, tinged with worry, and I looked up just as Simmy hurriedly flew toward me.
“Yes, I’m okay.” I raised both hands as she circled me. “Just... give me some rest, and I’ll be back to normal.”
I perked up as an idea dawned on me.
“Right, fellas!” I picked up a glass. “Maybe we can even do that interview. Simple, easy, just us hanging out and—”
The creak of a window opening reached my ears, and I twisted around to find Clark Kent jumping out of it.
“SIMMY, CATCH—”
I quickly sprinted to the window and looked out for Clark’s falling form.
There was a rush of air as I saw a red cape quickly fly away with Clark.
Wasn’t that Supergirl?
...What the fuck?
“Uh, I guess it’s just the two of us hanging out together.” I turned around and blinked at the empty room. “Bruce?”
The sound of the elevator dinging as it descended through the floors reached my ears.
I just quietly stared at the empty room for a moment. “It’s not me… right?”
Simmy slowly floated next to me and shot me a look.
…Fuck.
***
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I have advanced chapters lookup Daisyberry if you wanna read ahead.