Lord of Perverted Ladies

Adrian stared at himself.

Not in a mirror.

Not as a reflection.

Something else.

He was standing outside his own body, looking down at himself from somewhere that shouldn’t have existed.

His family was below him.

His mother.

His father.

Cael.

Echo.

The child.

The woman.

All of them looked impossibly small.

Adrian tried to move.

Nothing happened.

He tried to speak.

Nothing.

Then the version of himself standing below looked up.

Adrian froze.

It could see him.

The other Adrian smiled.

"You’re finally looking."

Adrian’s mind went blank.

The voice was his.

Again.

But this time there was no distortion.

No echo.

No distance.

It was simply him.

The version below raised its hand.

Adrian suddenly felt something pull at him.

He dropped.

Not physically.

Something deeper.

He fell through himself.

Then—

he opened his eyes.

He was lying on the floor.

His mother was kneeling beside him.

"Adrian!"

He blinked.

The room came back slowly.

The house.

The lights.

His family.

His own hands.

His own body.

He sat up.

"What happened?"

His father helped him stand.

"You collapsed."

"For how long?"

"Seconds."

Adrian looked around.

The woman was gone.

The child was gone.

Only his family remained.

Cael was staring at him.

"You saw something."

Adrian nodded.

"I saw myself."

Cael frowned.

"Another version?"

"No."

Adrian touched his chest.

"Me."

Cael became quiet.

His mother looked worried.

"What did you see?"

Adrian struggled to explain.

"I was looking at myself."

"From outside?"

"Yes."

"And?"

Adrian looked at his hands.

"He could see me."

His father asked,

"Who?"

Adrian looked at him.

"I don’t know."

A silence followed.

Then Echo raised his hand.

Adrian looked at him.

"What?"

"Can I ask a question?"

"Sure."

"Was he nice?"

Adrian stared at him.

"That’s what you’re worried about?"

Echo shrugged.

"If there is another you, that’s important."

Adrian almost smiled.

"He smiled."

Echo nodded.

"Then probably."

"Probably?"

"I’ve met you."

Adrian sighed.

"Fair."

His mother sat down.

She looked exhausted.

"Adrian."

He looked at her.

"There’s something else."

He immediately became serious.

"What?"

She looked toward his father.

He nodded.

"Tell him."

His mother took a breath.

"When I found you in the white room, I thought you were alone."

Adrian waited.

"I was wrong."

He already knew what she was going to say.

"There was another presence."

"Inside me?"

She nodded.

"Not inside your body."

She struggled to find the words.

"Inside your existence."

Adrian frowned.

"What’s the difference?"

"I don’t know."

That answer frightened him more than anything else.

His mother continued.

"When I reached for you, something reached back."

Adrian’s expression changed.

"What did it feel like?"

"Familiar."

"Like me?"

"No."

She looked at him.

"Like something that knew you."

Adrian became still.

His father spoke.

"That’s why I answered."

Adrian turned toward him.

"You felt it too."

"Yes."

"What did you hear?"

His father looked down.

"A question."

Adrian waited.

"What question?"

His father slowly answered.

"Who will answer for him?"

Adrian felt cold.

That wasn’t the same as Is anyone there?

It came before.

Someone had asked who would answer.

Then his father had answered.

Then Adrian had stayed.

The order was wrong.

Or perhaps—

Adrian had always remembered it wrong.

"Who asked that?"

His father shook his head.

"I don’t know."

Adrian looked toward the window.

"Maybe I do."

Everyone turned toward him.

Adrian stared at the night.

"The one inside me."

Cael immediately shook his head.

"No."

"Why?"

"Because if something was inside your existence before identity..."

He stopped.

"What?"

Cael looked afraid.

"It couldn’t have been you."

Adrian frowned.

"Why not?"

"Because you didn’t exist yet."

The room became silent.

Adrian slowly understood.

If the presence had been there before Adrian—

then it couldn’t simply be another version of him.

It was something that had existed alongside the possibility that became Adrian.

Something that had watched him before he became himself.

Something that might have influenced his first question.

Something that might have been answering him before his father ever spoke.

Adrian whispered,

"Then who am I?"

His mother immediately answered.

"Adrian."

He looked at her.

She didn’t hesitate.

"You’re my son."

His father nodded.

"You’re my son too."

Cael smiled.

"You’re my brother."

Echo raised his hand.

"You’re my friend."

The child added,

"You’re the one who stayed."

Adrian looked at all of them.

For some reason, that hurt.

Not because it was painful.

Because it was simple.

After all the ancient truths.

All the possibilities.

All the cosmic questions.

They still saw him as Adrian.

Not an answer.

Not a question.

Not a phenomenon.

Just Adrian.

He smiled.

"Thank you."

His mother hugged him.

For once, Adrian didn’t resist.

He closed his eyes.

Then he heard a whisper.

You’re welcome.

His eyes opened.

Nobody had spoken.

He slowly looked around.

"Did you hear that?"

Everyone shook their heads.

Adrian stepped away from his mother.

The whisper came again.

You’re welcome.

It was inside his head.

Not his voice.

Not the voice from before.

Something quieter.

Older.

Almost gentle.

Adrian closed his eyes.

"Who are you?"

No answer.

He tried again.

"Why are you here?"

Nothing.

Then—

I am where you were.

Adrian’s breathing stopped.

"What does that mean?"

Where you were before you were you.

Adrian opened his eyes.

The room looked normal.

But something had changed.

A shadow stood behind him.

He turned.

Nothing.

He looked toward the wall.

His shadow was there.

But it wasn’t moving correctly.

Adrian raised his hand.

The shadow didn’t.

It stayed still.

Then it turned its head.

Adrian froze.

The shadow looked at him.

And smiled.

His mother screamed.

The lights exploded.

Everything went black.

Adrian heard voices.

His father’s.

His mother’s.

Cael’s.

Echo’s.

Then silence.

A single sentence appeared inside Adrian’s mind.

YOU ARE LOOKING AT THE WRONG SIDE.

The darkness vanished.

Adrian was standing somewhere else.

The white room.

Again.

But this time, it wasn’t empty.

There was a table.

A chair.

And another Adrian sitting in it.

The other Adrian looked exactly like him.

Same face.

Same eyes.

Same clothes.

But something was different.

He looked tired.

Adrian approached.

"Who are you?"

The other Adrian laughed.

"You already asked that."

"Answer me."

"I can’t."

"Why?"

"Because you haven’t decided what I am yet."

Adrian frowned.

"What does that mean?"

The other Adrian leaned back.

"Names are choices."

"So?"

"You named yourself Adrian."

"Yes."

"Then you decided what Adrian meant."

Adrian stared at him.

"You’re saying I created you by naming myself?"

"No."

He shook his head.

"You created the possibility of me."

Adrian’s expression changed.

"Then you’re one of my possibilities."

"Not exactly."

"Then what?"

The other Adrian looked toward the white walls.

"I’m the part of you that remembers before you had a name."

Adrian stepped closer.

"What do you remember?"

"Everything you forgot."

"Then tell me."

The other Adrian smiled.

"You’re not ready."

Adrian’s patience broke.

"Everyone keeps saying that."

"I know."

"Then stop."

The other Adrian looked at him.

"Fine."

He stood.

"You weren’t alone before identity."

Adrian waited.

"You were afraid."

"Of what?"

"Of disappearing."

"I already knew that."

"No."

The other Adrian shook his head.

"You were afraid that if you became someone, you would stop being everything else."

Adrian stared at him.

The words struck something deep.

He had always thought identity meant choosing one thing.

One name.

One path.

One self.

But perhaps that was why so many versions of him existed.

Aeris.

Adrian.

Sol.

The forgotten one.

The one who left.

The one who stayed.

They weren’t separate because he had failed to choose.

They existed because choosing one self didn’t erase the others.

They remained possibilities.

Memories.

Parts.

The other Adrian stepped closer.

"You thought becoming Adrian meant killing everything you could have been."

Adrian whispered,

"Did I?"

"No."

The other Adrian smiled.

"You simply stopped being afraid of choosing."

Adrian felt his eyes burn.

"Then why are you still here?"

"Because you still are."

Adrian didn’t understand.

The other Adrian placed a hand against his chest.

"You think the past disappears when you choose."

He shook his head.

"It doesn’t."

"What happens to it?"

"It becomes part of you."

Adrian looked down.

"So you’re part of me."

"Yes."

"Then why can I see you?"

"Because you’re finally looking."

The room began shaking.

The walls cracked.

Adrian looked around.

"What is happening?"

The other Adrian smiled.

"Someone noticed."

"Who?"

The white room split open.

Beyond it was something enormous.

Not an eye.

Not a face.

Not the Audience.

Something much closer.

Something that felt like—

Adrian.

The same presence he had sensed since the beginning.

The thing that had been inside his existence.

The other Adrian looked toward it.

"They found us."

Adrian stepped forward.

"Who?"

The other Adrian’s smile disappeared.

"The one who remembers the first answer."

A voice came through the crack.

Adrian’s voice.

But older.

Much older.

"You shouldn’t have opened that door."

Adrian stared into the darkness.

"Why?"

The voice answered.

"Because now you can remember me."

The crack widened.

And something stepped through.

It had Adrian’s face.

His eyes.

His voice.

But unlike every version before—

it wasn’t a possibility.

It wasn’t a reflection.

It wasn’t a memory.

It was something that had existed before Adrian ever had the chance to choose.

It looked at him.

And whispered:

"I was there when you asked to leave."

Adrian couldn’t breathe.

The being smiled.

"And I was the one who told you yes."