4. Lilia
Hands in position, tight on the blade, and then… swish.
On an open field by a lake a young boy and a maid can be seen practicing the blade(stick).
A swing of the blade up. A tilt of it to the side. A proper placing of feet. And finally... a return to form. Then repeat. One foot forward, one foot back, preparing for an imaginary attack, then a pivot, then a swing, then a repeat. Then breathe...
Repeat.
Mechanically and dutifully, I repeat those three main techniques.
Honestly, it's kind of boring, but it's only for an hour, then... then I can move on to the fun part.
///
Swing. Clang clang. Swing. Clang clang.
Swing.
Miss.
It... might be a while before I reach the fun part.
Again and again, while staying true to form, I continued those repetitive stances all the while trying to put them to proper use. Swinging clashing. Swinging missing. Trying to hit her, and-
Whoosh.
...hitting nothing.
Yeah... if it wasn't obvious who was the child, and who was the adult it became blatantly obvious after a few minutes. Again and again, I would swing. Again and again, she sashays to the left, to the right, or wherever she thought right. Point is I learned real quickly what made a fight, and I didn't have it.
Not yet anyway.
I tried to stay true, I tried to stay composed, but after trying and failing to graze even her shadow, well... theirs only so much a man could take. Swinging wildly, swinging stupidly, I'm trying to at least graze her shoulder.
Emphasis on try.
A swing from the left, she dodges to the right. A swing from the right, she dodges to the left. I get lucky enough to catch her in a trance, or maybe she's just playing with me(?), and she dodges anyway, stepping slightly back, and using her sword(stick) to simply slide it away. And all the while still sashaying.
My pride...
Yeah... she's getting me frustrated.
I mean come on! She's literally dancing circles around me! A hit to my arm, my shoulder, my leg, or wherever, she's literally turning me into a punching dummy. Do I look like one?!
Don't answer that.
Regardless... I stayed composed-
Shut up.
-and returned to the 3 stances of before. I'm losing, but I'll keep losing if I don't improve them. If I'm to get anywhere, sooner rather then later, I'm going to need to build upon them, else... well I've been their once... unbreathing...
"...Hahhh..."
Never again.
It's a shame, but I wasn't born a prodigy. As such, I can only-
An opening!
Strike when I can!
Seeing her lagging I thrust towards her legs, and-
Oof!
Get hit for my troubles... I get boped in the head...
Ow... not yet.
Not one to give up though, and noticing the distance between us, I push forward anyways, an horizontal swing to the waist from the waist, and-
"Ouch."
...get hit once more.
Did I mention how hard it is to hit her?
Less saw more felt, her sword slid up mine, catching my fingers in the middle, and promptly smushing them for their worth. I've lost.
"It seems you have lost your fingers once again master Rudeus," she says nonchalantly.
"...yeah... I got that..."
Felt it too.
"Hey Lilia... this is just a thought, but you wouldn't happen to be angry with me... or something, right?"
"...of course not master Rudeus. Whatever gave you that idea?"
You paused. You definitely paused!
"...but if master Rudeus wishes, I'm willing to can-"
"Not a chance," I shot her down before she can get started. We've been here before. I would complain a little about a hit or two, because duh, and she would try to weasel out of it. Needless to say, I wasn't having any of that. It was tough enough getting her to say yes, last thing I'd want would be for her to throw away all my efforts.
Is she... trying to beat some sense into me?
I stare at her.
I'd rather not think of her that way.
It's been a week since I asked for tutelage, and things have gone, well... not exactly as expected. But I'm better. At least that's what I think.
"Hahh... Rudeus... I know I agreed to this, but don't you think your father would be a much better fit. I'm sure he would love to teach you, regardless of your age, and unlike I, he is 'actually' a swordsman. You'll learn plenty more from him then you would from someone like me."
"Maybe," I shrug. "I can't deny that, but... call it instinct, but something tells me it wouldn't quite be like that. I feel it in my bones. That if I somehow went to him, he'd go; 'That's my boy, now... Dodge!' And I don't really find the idea of being beaten all that appealing."
Wink wink, nudge nudge.
"...so I'm allowed to hit you?"
"Where did you get that?!"
"Pfft-"
I heard a muffled squeak as she turns her head away.
"...did you just laugh?"
"No. No I did not."
"Wait was that a jok-"
"Anyhow, master Rudeus-"
Oy!
"I understand your point of view, and admittedly Sir Paul can be... rather simple minded, so I will concede that to you, but I still feel your too young."
"Lilia-"
"But I've also learned master Rudeus is rather... obstinate himself, so I will concede this as well. However," she adjusts her glasses, standing firm. "I won't have you waste our efforts. I must insist on you hitting me by the end of your fourth namesake less these lessons be in vain, if not... I'm going to speak with Paul, and I will 'accidentally,' drop the topic of young master's enthusiasm for the sword."
"Lilia... you're actually evil aren't you."
She doesn't turn her head this time, but theirs definitely a faint twitch of her lip that I didn't fail to miss.
It's funny, she was against it at first, but despite everything, she actually takes teaching very seriously. Taking her time she goes through the motions as she slows down to a snails pace so I can follow. The proper placing of feet, the maneuvering of the blade, even the proper way to escape when in an inopportune position.
Would have like to known that last one in particular.
But yeah... I chose wisely.
I rub my wrist.
I think...
Who knew she was from the school of hard knox. The more you know~
Now...
"Alright, lay it on me."
She adjusts her glasses.
"First and foremost, your eyes, their too obvious. If you are to strike, try not to coordinate it so openly. I promptly suggest..." she entered sensei mode. This is routine now. Along with trying to escape from the situation, she would fall back to teaching, you know... eventually, and take her time to explain everything properly. Making a show of her earlier movements, and even adjusting my posture for good measure, she's a better teacher then she thinks.
“Ah, thank you sensei."
“...I’m not a sensei, young master,” she whispers, looking away from me, a hint of annoyance in her tone, but a hint of red on her face as well.
“Nope~"
“Sigh, young master is incorrigible. In any event, that settles it for today. Let's get you home. I have my ‘maid,’ duties to attend to,” she emphasizes the maid part.
Yes, yes, you're a maid. I noticed the uniform. You are still wearing it.
"And you need time for... recuperating."
You did notice!
“I will be moving on ahead now Rudeus, I will wait for you in the kitchen,” she says monotonously before leaving. My gaze never leaving her backside as she fades away into the distance.
And like that-
“...hahh... she's tougher then she looks...” I took a moment to breathe.
Things didn't quite go as expected. In many ways. It's a little thing, but in order to make our little 'exchange of duties,' happened some concessions needed to be made. In essence; me.
Lilia being busy, and I being well... obstinate, we kept talking circles around each other as we kept trying to have our way. For about a week. And so, even if I'm not the brightest bulb in the shed, even I could see that she was one breath away from spilling things to Paul... or taking me out to the woodshed and hitting me with a stick.
So I changed tactics. I offered the only thing I could, and gave myself.
Her logic usually being sound, falling long the lines of; 'I'm too busy,' 'I have my duties,' 'I'm sure Paul would be elated.' etc etc. It ultimately fell along the lines, it's too much trouble, and I'm cutting into her time, and so...
A helping hand was only natural.
It's a little thing, but it's something I can offer, and more importantly counters her perfectly.
Well... mostly. She did have her way in the end.
It was her idea, dissuading me with chores and everything, but in the end...
"Nope~"
Sorry Lilia, you'll have to spoil me rotten!
I'm still training my sword, no doubt, but that's just the beginning. I need something beyond it, and life skills were high on that list anyway, so when she offered, well, it's natural I'll accept. I'm a little thing, but I have no intention staying that way. In the end I want to be someone that tried everything then tried nothing at all. If not, then what's the point.
So sorry Lilia, but I am a spoiled young master, and I intend to play the part 'till the end.
"Well... at least she's nicer when she cooks."
Operation Me is still going!
I need a helping hand, and so do you. So I'll help you, help me, help you.
...Probably.
///
Lilia [pov]
How did I get stuck with him?
"Okay, what's next?"
“...now you, wait a few minutes ‘till the grain changes color before you can drop the veggies,” I explained to master Rudeus.
“Why?’
“Because the veggies, and grain have two different boiling points. Placing both at the same time wouldn't be wise. You'll end up with a delicious meal on one side, and a side of overcooked veggies on the other. Most likely burnt,” I explain to him.
He nods in acknowledgment.
Similar lessons have become customary now. The young master, per usual, absorbs everything like a sponge. He is Zenith’s and Paul’s pride and joy. An exemplary child. He is... frightening.
That child… he has never been nothing, but exemplary.
Born several years ago, he was born drawing out amniotic fluids like any child would. A normal birth, from a normal family, or rather... that's how it should have been. Rather then crying, or twitching, like any child should he was... still. Deadly so.
Ah. So that's how it is.
I remembered thinking at the time.
I had my own worries, and didn't think much of it. A stillbirth, is quite an upsetting matter, but not unheard of. In fact it's quite common, especially among former adventurers who've lived a difficult lifestyle. It's almost expected that the first conception is to be the most treacherous. That said, telling a mother her first isn't moving is never easy. It didn't help that this would be my first as well.
Thus I held my tongue.
I simply cleaned him in somber silence, and waited.
“Hmmm… argh…”
And yet he stirred.
In my hands, as I was cleaning him, mumbling and turning, he moved.
I… made a mistake?
I thought that back then.
I didn't know how I made such a mistake, but I could care less. I threw away all prior thoughts, including thoughts of finding a new workplace, and embraced the miracle. The baby was fine, and that was all that mattered.
///
I really underestimated his liveliness though.
Rather then lively he was more rowdy then anything else. Quiet when alone, yet rowdy when hungry, he was quite a conundrum. It was a paradox. He was a paradox. Babies quite often make noises when hungry, in need of changing, or simply in discomfort, but this child... he was simply odd. Rather then imitating it felt like was trying to do something with his strange babbling.
He was simply too odd.
As someone that has cared for children, I can safely say that a child is nothing if not demanding, but this child... he would pause whenever you would enter the room.
That was only where the irregularities began though.
Another was he was always on the move. Kitchen, cupboard, fireplace, anywhere you deemed impossible, he would be there. How he got his stubby limbs on such places I will never know, but he did. And he was only 6 months.
But that's not what made him frightening.
Peculiar, yes, but frightening, no.
No, that wasn’t it, rather it was his eyes. His eyes… those weren’t a child’s eyes.
They were simply too clear.
When a person enters a room one would often turn their head to acknowledge them. It's common courtesy. But for a child it's...
When you hold him, he looks at you. When you read to him, he focuses on the words, and not the speaker. When Lady Zenith would unbutton her blouse for feeding he gazes upon them. Every time. Irregularity upon irregularity.
He was an irregularity.
At first it was unnoticeable, I thought I was being paranoid, but as he got older and his childish features gave way to a young child it became apparently clear that he is clearly aware of the world… and of women. Perhaps it was nothing, perhaps I was simply being affected by my past experiences, but... he simply seemed ‘too,’ aware of things.
I thought such things back then.
My instincts wouldn't let me sleep.
So I decided to test him one day.
If nothing else, but for my peace of mind.
One evening, I decided to ask Zenith if I could wash him. A way to give Zenith a reprieve, and concurrently figure things out. A simple endeavor. I would bathe him, clothed him, and more importantly, change in front of him. A simple test to see if he 'sees' things, or if things were simply in my head.
He stared.
As I rubbed him from top to bottom, I made sure to ‘accidentally,’ brush my breast against him, as well as bending over so as to reach for a brush or towel, I would make sure to make a 'show' of things, as I went about things a little more slowly then needed. Not enough to arouse suspicion, but enough to notice the obvious.
Not once did his gaze waver.
He even blushed. He wasn’t even 2, and when I turned back to check, his face was clearly flushed.
Needless to say I never bathed with the young master after that.
Still though the irregularities persisted.
He would look at my ‘assets,’ when he thought I wouldn’t notice. He would inhale your scent if you were to hold him close. Whether it’s me or lady Zenith, doesn’t seem to matter. He only didn’t do it with Paul. And just as strange he would go up and read, from time to time, without a parent alone. Furthermore, adding to his mysteriousness, he would also mysteriously disappear from time to time and come back wet and breathing hard like a beast.
With such thoughts I grew weary he would attack me.
My heart nearly came out of my chest when he actually asked me to train him one day.
Of course I said no.
I could barely stand him, let alone be alone with him.
On my mother’s name I was certain I would reject him. That, that's what I would say.
And yet...
…those eyes.
I couldn't say no.
On that day he squeezed my hands, and looked in me the eyes like he always did, and yet... it didn't feel the same. Somehow, those eyes that always sent shivers down my spine, they didn't seem to be all that displeasing. Somehow... they seemed to be pleading to me.
I think I am a pushover.
And so I relented.
I should probably be laughed at, but I decided to teach the child that would be the end of me how to hold a sword.
I still tried to reject him. Tried to slow things down, to an annoying pace so as to dissuade him, but in the end it was foolhardy. He was too prodigious, and twice as infuriating. Eventually a spar became necessary.
I don’t know what excuse I’ll make for Zenith, but if my life is forfeit, I’ll at least defend myself.
And with such thoughts we started our spars. I had already made my bed the least I could was meet him on it, but on my terms.
I waited for him to attack, and…
I parried.
Then he attacked again.
Then I parried once more.
Again, and again...
And then...
'Huh?'
...I started to think I overthought things.
He was sloppy.
Somehow, though prodigious, he was still a complete amateur. A paradox. For a three year old he was undoubtably ahead of the curb, but for a spirit, beast, or whatever he is, he was...
I see...
...not what I expected.
Somehow, though my fear of him lessened over the years, it always lingered in the back of my mind, but as we kept going, practicing the techniques, striking back, and more importantly retaliating-my apologies lady Zenith, it became apparent.
He’s just a child.
Precocious, lively, and too aware for his own good. But most certainly a child, and... more importantly...
"...hahh... hahh..."
I don't think he was a bad person.
The image of him breathing with difficulty as he struggles to get to his feet lingers in my head. Along with other memories. Him crawling around, moving around, stumbling to the ground, and even the memory of him holding his bloody finger to my lips as a way to silence me. With those ever clear eyes, that I didn't find all that displeasing at the time.
“Miss Lilia, I’m done slicing the veggies.”
Yes... clear.
Peculiar, odd, and many other things, but... not unkind, and most importantly... sincere.
“Thank you, Rudy, please set them aside, and I’ll put them with the rest,” I stared at him. "Rudeus..."
"Hmm?" He turns to look at me, his eyes...
"Nothing. Nothing at all."
He blinks owlishly, before turning away.
I really did see too many things. He's just the young master. And that's all that matters.
"...your eyes aren't half bad..." I grumbled.
"Lilia?"
"Nothing. Nothing at all."
It really was nothing.
If nothing else, an extra pair of hands is always nice to have.
///
Rudy [pov]
Well, I say operation raise Lilia’s affection is a rising success. Don’t exactly know how I did it, but it seems I got in her good graces. That or I'm getting used to her hits.
I'd rather not think of that.
Anyways, weeks turn to months, and I am now three. Have been training with Lilia for a while now, and I feel I might be ready for the next step in my training. That step being magic.
Lilia is great, don't get me wrong, but a mage she is not, and as for me...
Well, I'm not exactly an overpowered neet.
No, unlike a certain 34-yr old Isekai protagonist I'm just an average person, and as such my understanding of physics starts and ends at a fifth grade level. The water cycle; condensation, evaporation, precipitation. Yeah, I can work with that. Making a bog, or lightning, or something a little more demanding, that's a little bit beyond me.
I can spoof something out.
Probably.
But don't expect me to blow the enemy up.
Where is my explosion magic?!
It also doesn't help that I'm training in secret around Lilia's schedule.
"Helping hand huh..." I pondered. Standing over the pond, that turned out wasn’t a lake, I took out the book I hid there, and started wondering if the time had finally come. Unlike my other actions, that were generally along the plot line, not including Lilia's tutorship, this next step would have MAJOR repercussions.
That being Roxy's tutelage.
I have been thinking this for a while, ever since I started training in magic, whether I should go down the ‘plot,’ or follow my own path, but in the end, in spite of the dangers, I can't deny that things would be easier if I was training with someone that knew what they were doing then trying to tackle things alone.
Thank you Lilia.
Going down the Roxy-
That doesn't sound right.
path, helps me towards that. It invites it's own problems admittedly, but it also provides many solutions. All of which I need.
I could tough it out. Take the swordsmanship lessons I can from Lilia and Paul, and weather it on myself. But...
Hitogami exists.
Unfortunately for me that was always an impossibility.
That 'man' is a clairvoyant.
And that's the crux of the issue.
The core of the series was written around a character, me I suppose now, reacting towards the machinations of a clairvoyant by the name Hitogami. A man versus god scenario and all the intricacies that come with that. Makes for a compelling reading, makes for an infuriating living, but more importantly... a pain in my backside.
In essence; I was born in the palm of his hand, or will be in the near future.
Clairvoyant and telepath, because of course he is, versus me... a guy with future knowledge... it is frustrating. I'd like to say I like my chances, but I'd be lying.
That's why I thought of avoiding it. If I could just avoid Roxy and be done with it. Free from the plot, free to live my life, and free to breathe as I please. No Roxy, no romance, and hence no Laura, and hence no threat to Hitogami. Hence... Freedom. But...
That's too hopeful.
As soon as that naive thought entered my head it quickly exited it as I recalled the rest of that story. Specifically the events about a time that never was.
"...no..."
Sometime, during his academic years, the protagonist of Mushoku Tensei had a visitor from a certain future, himself, and through that possible future, one where Hitogami won, things clearly became apparent: Hitogami wouldn't stop. The events are blurry, but in that timeline, the timeline Roxy died, Laura was never born, and consequently no threat to him ever existed. You would think that would be the end of it, bad guy wins, roll credits. But...
No, Hitogami isn't that kind.
He is thorough.
Unfortunately all of my descendants, children and/or grandchildren, are blind spots for Hitogami. Something outside his scope of control. Something that shouldn't exists. Something he couldn't allow to exist.
So he didn’t.
I can not remember the details, it was a novel to me back then. Probably for the best considering how I now have an actual face to associate everyone with. I do not want to imagine my loved ones dying.
But I do know that they died. All of them.
Roxy, my would be first wife. Followed by Slyph, my would be second. Then another, and another. Wife, friend, family, it didn't matter. Just another piece off the board. The order is murky, and I do not remember the details, but I do remember that in the end I, or 'him,' was left all alone. And bitter.
Why so thorough?
Because he can.
Because to him our lives are nothing. Simply pawns on a board for some illusionary plan. And we were simply living outside of his control. An uncontrollable variable, and as such had to be removed from that board.
…
…funny enough, he didn’t kill that version of Rudeus. Instead told him everything, and left him to ‘live,’ a life of misery. Hence how I know.
Quite a comic book villain isn’t he.
But yes, peaceful coexistence is impossible.
And so the moral quandary of whether I should involve Roxy ended before it began.
The answer was easy.
“Splash Flow…”
If I have to go down paths, where the same dangerous beast lies across both of them. Then I'd rather go down the path I know best. Don’t know about Roxy as a lover, or anything beyond that, but as a powerful friend and ally? That is too attractive to let up. And so, I let it flow.
“Hah hah… this is why I need a teacher,” I breathed hard after casting. “I’ll see you soon Roxy sensei.”
Become my strength. Clairvoyant and telepath vs self-insert with the equivalent of future knowledge. It’s like being gifted a gun with one bullet that can shoot down god. It's not much, but... well neither am I.
Well then, better make that shot count.