Chapter 59: Super Josh
A note from potato_mine
Enoki Machinegun is actually the first "Weaponized Plant" I thought of before writing this story back in September last year
The morning after the party came quietly.
Lyon felt calmer in the early autumn light. Streets that had been full of music and laughter the night before were now slow and peaceful, cafés opening their doors while the smell of fresh bread drifted through the air again.
Phong gathered everyone in the motel lobby.
Dominic was still stretching sleep out of his shoulders.
Janet had already finished one cup of coffee.
Jake and Jack looked suspiciously well-rested for people who had stayed out dancing.
Alex leaned comfortably against Phong’s shoulder.
Séline and Camille waited patiently, curious why he had called everyone together.
Phong looked at the two French girls.
“Can you take us somewhere first?” he asked.
“Before we go sightseeing again.”
Camille tilted her head.
“Where?”
Phong answered simply.
“The graveyard.”
Séline froze for a beat.
Camille’s smile faded.
They understood at once.
The cemetery sat on a quiet hill overlooking the city.
Old stone markers.
Iron gates.
Rows of autumn leaves scattered along the paths.
Lyon had many old cemeteries, but this one held a few newer graves.
Divers.
Friends of Séline and Camille.
Members of their old team.
The walk through the cemetery was quiet.
No jokes.
No rushing.
They stopped in front of several simple headstones set side by side.
Séline stood still for a moment.
She had not expected this.
Camille looked at Phong.
“You didn’t have to do this.”
He shrugged.
“They were your friends.”
“They were divers.”
“That’s enough.”
The honesty of it landed harder than any dramatic speech could have.
Alex stood beside him with her hands in her coat pockets.
She tried very hard to look solemn.
Then after a few seconds she leaned toward Séline and stage-whispered loud enough for everyone to hear.
“Considerate.”
“That’s the guy I fell for.”
Dominic snorted quietly.
Séline shook her head, amused despite herself.
“You know, Alex…”
“If you ever dump him…”
She pointed at Phong.
“We might steal him.”
Camille nodded.
“Absolutely.”
Alex crossed her arms with full drama.
“You can try.”
Then she smirked.
“But you’ll have to fight me first.”
That broke the heaviness at once.
Even in a cemetery, laughter came back.
The dead were remembered not only with sadness, but with the warmth that meant they had not been forgotten.
Back at the motel, one member of the group had been left behind on purpose.
Rico.
The raccoon had crashed magnificently after the previous night’s caffeine rampage.
He was sprawled on one of the motel beds like a tiny furry corpse, the wooden treant armor still partly wrapped around him.
Which was good.
Because overnight, he had become famous.
French social media had exploded with videos from the party.
The raccoon yanking down three pairs of pants.
The tiny warrior raccoon suddenly turning into a walking wooden armor suit.
The clips were already trending.
Theories had started.
Was it a trained animal?
A dungeon familiar?
A new awakened ability?
Was the armor real?
Was it an illusion?
Dominic had made the executive decision.
“Rico stays inside today.”
No one argued.
As they walked back through Lyon, Phong’s system menu flickered again.
He opened it casually.
A message.
From Em.
He already knew this would not improve his day.
The text blinked playfully.
[Guess what I gave Josh.]
[Guess it.]
[Guess it.]
Phong sighed.
“You’re insufferable.”
Another message appeared.
[A second class.]
[The first… how do humans call it…]
[Right.]
[Multiclass.]
Then a video file appeared in the menu.
Phong played it.
The group gathered around.
The footage showed chaos deep in the dungeon.
Floor Three.
Dark caverns.
Broken stone.
Josh fighting.
Emma beside him.
Josh moved like a living teleport.
Blinking through space in sharp bursts.
Each movement left a faint distortion behind.
Like Azazel from X-Men.
His fists hit with brutal force.
Monsters folded under blows carrying terrifying kinetic power.
The diver records listed his class as Martial Artist, evolved into Pugilist at level 30.
Front-line hybrid.
Tank and close-range damage.
But now—
This second class gave him something else.
Mobility.
Extreme mobility.
Even Vanessa’s assassin movement probably would not match it.
Dominic frowned.
“…That’s bad.”
Janet nodded.
“If Alex fought him now…”
Jack finished the thought.
“Draw.”
Alex crossed her arms.
“I’d still win eventually.”
Phong closed the menu calmly.
He refused to let Em ruin their day.
He wrote a reply.
[So how did Emma react to you wearing her face?]
Em answered at once.
[Who said I went as her?]
Another message followed.
[This is Halloween, human cub.]
[We wear costumes.]
Phong frowned.
Then the next message appeared.
[I used your appearance to greet Josh and Emma.]
Everyone stopped walking.
Phong blinked.
Slowly.
Carefully.
Another message popped up.
[Emma shot me between the eyebrows.]
[Fun time, right?]
[Sometimes it feels like I understand human culture more than you do.]
For a moment, Phong’s brain refused to process the image.
Then it did.
The mental picture hit him like Truck-kun launching some poor bastard into an isekai.
Josh and Emma walking through the dungeon.
Suddenly meeting…
Phong.
Except not Phong.
A Lovecraftian chaos thing wearing his face.
Greeting them casually.
And Emma answering by shooting it in the forehead.
Phong stared at the screen.
Then slowly rubbed his face.
“You win.”
Alex leaned over.
“What?”
Phong sighed deeply.
“You win, you Lovecraftian asshole.”
He closed the menu.
Internally, he kept score.
Floor Boss: 1
Phong: 0
The vacation in Lyon continued.
But somewhere deep in the dungeon, chaos had just handed Josh a terrifying new edge.
When the group returned to Maison Delacroix – Chambres d’Hôtes, the late afternoon light painted the motel in warm gold. The place looked peaceful, the same small family place they had left earlier.
Camille pushed open the gate first.
“Welcome back to—”
She stopped.
Everyone behind her took two more steps, then froze too.
In the backyard…
…stood a tree.
A very large tree.
Not a sapling.
Not even a young tree.
A thirty-foot lime-oak towered in the middle of the yard, its pale bark glowing faintly with mana, its wide crown throwing long shadows across the grass.
Dominic blinked slowly.
“…We were only gone for four hours.”
Janet rubbed her temple.
“Please tell me this is not what I think it is.”
Phong already knew.
He sighed.
“That’s the sprout.”
Camille’s parents rushed outside the moment they heard the commotion.
Mrs. Delacroix looked horrified.
She started apologizing at once in hurried, broken English.
“I am so sorry. I am so sorry.”
Camille stepped forward.
“Maman?”
Her mother pointed helplessly at the tree.
“We find the raccoon!”
Everyone turned toward the motel.
Rico was currently sitting on the roof railing, pretending he did not exist.
Mrs. Delacroix kept going.
“He was… how you say… sleepwalking?”
Dominic snorted.
“Sounds about right.”
She gestured wildly.
“He digging bags like… dumpster!”
Rico quietly slid behind a chimney.
Mrs. Delacroix continued the story with rising stress.
“When I clean room, I see small plant on floor.”
She mimed holding something tiny.
“I think, okay, little tree. Need pot.”
She had only tried to save it.
That was all.
But the moment the sprout touched soil—
Everything went wrong.
“Tree grow!”
She threw both hands upward.
“Fast! Very fast!”
Camille’s father had ended up having to wrap it up in several trash bag just to stop the roots from destroying the room.
In the end they had hauled the rapidly growing tree outside.
Now it stood in the backyard like a monument to terrible choices.
“If we leave inside,” Mr. Delacroix said with a weary shrug, “your tree destroy motel.”
Camille buried her face in her hands.
“Maman… I’m so sorry…”
Mrs. Delacroix shook her head quickly.
“No, no. My fault.”
“I should know diver friends bring… strange things.”
Dominic crossed his arms.
“We had one rule.”
“Don’t plant dungeon trees in European motels.”
Jake added helpfully,
“When did we have that one oddly specific rule?”
Janet pinched the bridge of her nose.
“Since we brought a chaotic gremlin in the body of a raccoon to Europe.”
All eyes turned slowly toward the raccoon.
Rico raised both paws.
“It was an accident.”
They believed him.
A new rule was also declared immediately.
Rico would not be allowed in the same room as important items.
Or magical plants.
Or luggage.
Or basically anything.
The raccoon loudly protested, but they all knew it was only an act to get caffeine.
Phong stepped closer to the tree.
Despite the absurdity, his farmer instincts were already working.
He examined the bark.
The leaves.
The faint frost-like shimmer on the branches.
He picked one fruit, cut it open, and looked inside.
The flesh still held the same cool sweetness as the Snow Lime from the original lime-oak.
He tasted it carefully.
Still good.
Still refreshing.
But…
“No buff.”
Dominic raised a brow.
“What?”
“No mana effect,” Phong said.
“And no seeds.”
He turned the fruit slowly in his hand.
“This one only makes normal fruit.”
That meant the special dungeon properties needed dungeon soil.
The group relaxed a little.
Janet crossed her arms.
“Well.”
“At least we didn’t accidentally create a monster-evolving orchard in France.”
Phong looked up at the tree again.
Then smiled slightly.
“You know what?”
“What?” Alex asked.
“This is actually perfect.”
Everyone stared at him.
Phong gestured toward the tree.
“The first lime-oak clone…”
“…is not in the dungeon.”
Dominic blinked.
“…You’re trolling Em.”
Phong shrugged.
“Absolutely.”
Alex laughed.
“That is the most passive-aggressive rebellion I’ve ever seen.”
Even so, the Delacroix family still felt bad about the whole mess.
Mrs. Delacroix insisted on making it up to them.
That night, the motel backyard turned into an impromptu feast.
The Lambert family from the restaurant next door came over.
Long tables were set up under the newly grown lime-oak.
Lanterns hung from the branches.
And the food…
The food looked like a celebration of everything French cooking could offer.
Roasted meats.
Cheese boards.
Fresh bread.
Wine.
More dishes than Dominic could name.
Mr. Delacroix even brought out a very expensive bottle of champagne.
Séline whistled at the label.
“You kept that since when?”
Mr. Lambert looked even more shocked.
“Jean-Luc.”
“You were saving that for Camille’s wedding.”
Mr. Delacroix shrugged.
“Well.”
“I might die before she starts dating anyone.”
The whole table burst into laughter.
Camille shot her father a murderous glare.
“Papa.”
He raised both hands at once.
“Just saying.”
Mr. Lambert nearly choked laughing.
Mrs. Lambert wiped tears from her eyes.
Alex leaned toward Phong and whispered,
“Your raccoon caused international agriculture chaos.”
Phong looked at the huge lime-oak glowing under the lanterns.
Then at the families laughing around the table.
Then at Rico trying to sneak another energy drink.
He sighed in peace.
“…Worth it.”'
A note from potato_mine
Here're some trivia about the giant golden retriever:
- Dominic official nationality is actually Spanish. He got a work visa to come to the US to train for an upcoming tournament, then got stuck there after boxing become irrelevant. Now that he married Janet he had no paper issue, but that fact had never crossed his mind when he propose to her
- Dominic is half Spanish, half Morocco. His last name Torres come from Fernando Torres (and not Dominic Toretto since I have not watched any Fast and Furious)
- Dominic favorite food is donut balls. He doesn't like glazed donut
- Dominic doesn't like the responsibility that come with having pets, so he never adopt any. He like animals, though, and enjoys spending time with Bruno, Nyx, and sometimes Rico.
- Dominic has simulation sickness and can't play any games in first person