Chapter 34: Empty Expression
As they ran through the tunnel to escape that hell, everything felt like a wave of flickering, broken images to Bonnie — shattered fragments undermining every logical thought in her mind like a chisel driving into her deepest memories. Everything happened fast, so fast that even that felt like it made no sense to her. Evelyn's ragged breathing, the sound of their feet pounding against the ground, and the voices of the exorcists fading into the distance behind them.
None of it felt real… She could barely make out what Evelyn was saying to her, since the sharp, relentless ringing left in her ears from the explosion was still there, dulling her senses.
Thieving Cat pushed her forward, stopping at the stairs. She was forcing Bonnie to climb up first.
Confused, Bonnie obeyed, and Evelyn followed close behind toward the surface. The light from the makeshift lanterns waiting at the top of the hatch nearly burned their eyes, but they ignored the discomfort and pushed through the door that had been left shut. Once outside, Bonnie's eyes drifted across the rain-soaked circus grounds.
People were still milling about, completely unaware of what had just happened in the shadows beneath their feet. She almost felt offended by that — but Evelyn grabbed her hand and pulled her toward Capella, who was resting nearby.
Just as they were about to mount up, a chill ran down both their spines.
Behind them, like some grim coincidence, the blonde girl with scarlet eyes appeared. Her white dress was streaked with mud, and she wore that same gentle smile on her face. As she stepped into one of the tents, it became clear she was barefoot. She vanished on the other side of the tent — only to reappear a second later, standing right in front of the horse, having rounded the corner of another tent entirely.
Evelyn looked at her, and a sharp headache hit her hard enough to make her press a hand to her forehead. At the same moment, everything around them froze, as though time itself had shattered. The raindrops stopped falling mid-air, suspended. The nearby people stared at the ground as though hypnotized, and a bolt of lightning hung frozen in the sky, even before the thunder's sound could reach anyone's ears.
Bonnie's eyes went wide with shock at the sight of her — it was the same girl who had told her about the circus. That girl, standing before them now with that sinister smile, drifted closer, as though floating just above the ground.
Everything became clear in that instant.
"You… You knew. You knew the whole time…" Bonnie whispered.
She looked at Evelyn, realizing she was suffering through the exact same paralysis as everyone else nearby. With her nerves on edge, she sensed the danger and tried to reach for her revolver — but the girl showed no fear at all. If anything, she lifted a finger and pressed it to her own lips.
"Shhh… Don't say it so loud, or they'll hear you. I mean, they don't really like to play the way I do," the girl said, stroking Capella, who stayed just as still as everything else around her. "They'd tear you apart alive in an instant…"
Bonnie trembled — her voice trembled with her.
"Why…? Why are you doing this?"
The girl tilted her head, curious.
"Why, you ask? There isn't really a why."
Bonnie clenched her fist.
"Why kill innocent people? Them! They had nothing to do with any of this…"
"Hmm… I don't know what you're talking about. I've never killed anyone," she said, vanishing in a blink and reappearing right beside Bonnie.
In a soft whisper, she spoke close to her ear.
"But you could be my first victim, Bonnie. That might make you my next ritual… Or maybe it'll make you one of us…"
The rain fell. The thunder rolled. People went about their business. Bonnie blinked a couple of times — there was no one around her. In fact, she was already sitting in Capella's saddle, and Evelyn was holding the reins. Confused, she brought a hand to her head. Her mind was a storm of mixed emotions, memories, and half-formed thoughts dragging her toward something close to madness.
Clinging to Thieving Cat, Bonnie kept her eyes open, fixed on some point over Evelyn's shoulder that wasn't really a point at all. The rain hit her face, and she didn't blink, didn't flinch, didn't seem to feel it at all. Her pupils didn't track the movement of the street, or the broken light of the lightning, or anything happening in front of her. It was as though her eyes had simply been left open by accident, forgotten there, while the rest of Bonnie had gone somewhere else entirely.
Neither of them spoke again after that. The sound of the horse's hooves through the mud, the rain against the tents, and the thunder overhead kept pace with their escape.
Further along, almost at the circus exit, they ran into Adam, still searching, lost among a crowd of people throwing him irritated looks, since his horse was taking up too much of the street.
The man watched Thieving Cat approach. His eyes filled with hope — but with her face hardened into a flat, empty, exhausted expression, Evelyn shook her head, letting him understand exactly what had happened to Neira.
"The Church people are here," she said. "They're handling it now, so give me back my horse and wait for them here. Since you've never crossed the Church, I'm sure they'll want to help you."
The man said nothing. He climbed down from the horse and simply stared out at the horizon, his eyes empty.
Evelyn turned back to Bonnie, but she seemed so far removed from everything happening around her that it didn't even seem worth trying to pull her back to reality. So instead, Evelyn pulled a length of rope from one of Bonnie's saddlebags and tied it around Storm's neck.
Before walking away, without looking at the man, she said:
"My deepest condolences…"
It was there, as she walked off, that she heard Adam's muffled sobbing fade into the distance behind her.
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Victoria wore a somewhat bored, disappointed expression. She waited at the hotel entrance with an umbrella, scanning the street in case she spotted one or two horses with their riders.
Lady appeared beside her, also holding an umbrella, and waited alongside her.
"Evelyn really is a wild soul, isn't she? Between the two of us, she's the one who actually fits the outlaw role best."
"Which is exactly why she's always doing something this stupid — like running off after a girl she barely knows."
Lady let out a small laugh.
"She's freedom incarnate. At this rate, she'll probably reach the second Stigma before either of us. Doesn't that worry you a little?"
"A little. If she picks up more of the Ballad's abilities, she'll probably find even more stupid things to do. Then she'll come crying into my arms when it all goes wrong. She's been like that since the day I met her."
Giving Victoria a few light pats on the back, Lady rested her head on her shoulder.
The minutes passed in the middle of the storm. In the distance, two distorted shapes took form between the lit streetlamps. It was Bonnie and Evelyn, moving slowly down the deserted, rain-soaked street.
Lady smiled at the sight of both of them returning in one piece — but Victoria frowned, already suspecting what had happened. Lady caught on just as quickly.
Evelyn stopped in front of them; she didn't meet their eyes. Her blank, hollow expression already told Victoria everything she needed to know.
The woman walked up to Thieving Cat and extended her hand.
"Let me help you down."
Evelyn shook her head.
"It's Bonnie who needs the help right now."
Victoria looked past Evelyn's shoulder. There she found the girl, looking utterly detached from everyone around her. Her eyes didn't seem to register the hotel lights or the lamp illuminating them at that moment either.
With a long, weary sigh, La Señora pressed a hand to her forehead, then shook her head to herself. At the same time, Lady looked past her toward Bonnie. A look of quiet, sorrowful pity stayed with her as she and Victoria helped Bonnie down off the horse. They walked her toward the hotel entrance, but stopped halfway, since Evelyn still hadn't dismounted.
"Go inside," the woman said.
Evelyn smiled, exhausted, and answered:
"I'm going to stay out here a little longer. I'll come in on my own once I've taken the horses to the stable. Look after Bonnie for me…"
Both women stayed quiet for a moment. Then they turned and walked back into the hotel.
Once they disappeared into the light of the doorway, Evelyn lowered her head and tightened her grip on the reins. A short, broken breath escaped her lips.