Ch: 350 [What Could Possibly Go Wrong?]
[New York] [Wilson Estate]
The Wilson Estate felt unusually quiet that afternoon.
Halle and Chloe had gone shopping with Asher, Caroline was meeting her father, Rachel was in Los Angeles preparing Titan Technology Day, Scarlett was shooting Alien 2, Angelina was testing costumes for DC: Gods & Wonders, and Evangeline had already flown to New Zealand for Hobbit 2.
Max had finally surrendered to exhaustion after spending most of the previous night arguing over names for the twins. After hours, their daughter was officially Diana and their son was Aiden.
Both babies were sleeping after their bottles while one of Alex's clones watched over them in the nursery.
That left Alex and Trixie unsupervised, which the household would later identify as the first mistake.
They stood in the backyard wearing flame-resistant suits, thick gloves, protective boots, and heavy helmets that made them resemble workers from some zombie movie. A massive block of ice rested on reinforced stone near the gardens because Alex and Trixie thought melting it normally would be painfully boring.
Max's flamethrower rested nearby.
Alex checked Trixie's visor and made sure everything sat properly before lowering his own helmet. "Do you remember our promise?" he asked while pointing at her.
Trixie pulled her helmet down, secured the visor, and raised one gloved thumb with complete seriousness. "Aye aye, sir. I listen to everything you say, I don't point it anywhere you don't tell me, and if Mom asks, this was your idea."
Alex stared at her through his visor for several seconds. "That last part wasn't included in our agreement, although I respect the speed at which you've prepared your legal defense."
Trixie glanced toward the huge block of ice and practically bounced inside the bulky suit. "Can I do it now? You said I could pull the trigger."
"I did say that," Alex replied as he picked up the flamethrower and carried it toward the marked area. "You're getting one supervised shot first, and I'm holding onto this thing with you."
Trixie hurried after him. "That still counts as me doing it."
"It absolutely counts."
Alex positioned himself behind her, keeping control of the weight while Trixie held the grips in front of him. The giant ice block stood safely across the stone clearing, looking completely innocent despite being the reason they were dressed like apocalypse survivors.
Trixie looked back at him through her visor. "This is way cooler than homework."
Alex laughed. "That's a dangerously low bar, kiddo."
"Math doesn't shoot fire."
"You make a strong argument."
Trixie turned back toward the ice while Alex steadied everything around her. "Ready?"
Alex checked the area one final time before answering. "Whenever you're ready."
Trixie squeezed the trigger.
A roaring stream of flame burst forward.
Her eyes went huge behind the visor.
"WHOA!"
The flame slammed into the ice, and a thick cloud of steam exploded upward as water immediately began running across the stone.
Trixie started laughing so hard Alex could feel her shaking against him. "This is awesome!"
"Keep your eyes forward," Alex reminded her, although he was laughing too.
"I am!"
"You're also yelling loud enough for Max to wake up three floors away."
Trixie lowered her voice slightly. "This is awesome!"
Alex grinned. "Much better."
They released the trigger, and the fire disappeared. Steam continued rolling away from the ice while several deep cracks spread through its surface.
Trixie stared at the damage. "Can I do another one?" She looked up at Alex. "Please?"
Alex looked at the ice, then at her excited face. "One more short shot."
"Yes!"
She focused again while Alex kept the flamethrower steady. Trixie fired, sending another burst across the clearing. The ice hissed violently as another chunk cracked loose and crashed onto the wet stone.
Trixie laughed. "We're destroying it!"
Alex looked toward the giant block. "Oh yeah. Burn it down to the ground."
"Hit the big crack!" She said loudly.
Alex laughed and shifted their aim toward the cracked section.
Trixie fired again.
Another cloud of steam rushed upward, thicker than the first one. For several seconds, the white cloud blocked part of their view as the wind pushed it sideways.
Alex immediately eased her hand away from the trigger.
"Hold up."
Trixie stopped and waited while the steam moved across the garden.
A faint crackling sound came from somewhere nearby.
Both of them tilted their heads.
A small section of Max's enormous elephant-shaped hedge was smoking.
Trixie stared through her visor.
A tiny flame appeared near one of the elephant's ears.
"Uh... Alex?"
"Yeah."
"Max's elephant is on fire."
Alex quickly set the flamethrower aside and grabbed the nearby extinguisher. "Stay right there."
He crossed the lawn and handled the small fire before it could spread. Within seconds, the flame disappeared beneath a coating of white residue.
Trixie walked over once Alex waved her forward.
They stood beside each other and stared at the hedge.
The elephant still looked like an elephant.
It just looked like an elephant that had survived a rough weekend.
One ear was partially burned, several leaves were gone, and white extinguisher residue covered the side of its head.
Trixie slowly lifted her visor. "Maybe she won't notice."
Alex turned his head toward her.
Trixie looked at the elephant again.
"Okay, she's definitely gonna notice."
Alex rested his hands on his hips. "Max talks to this hedge sometimes."
Trixie looked horrified. "She does?"
"I've caught her saying good morning to it."
"That's weird."
"It is a little weird."
Trixie pointed toward the burned ear. "Maybe we can fix it before she wakes up."
Alex stepped closer and examined the damage. "I can probably get the gardeners to reshape it once the leaves grow back."
Trixie frowned. "That sounds like it takes forever."
"Plants tend to be annoying like that."
She walked around the hedge, studying it from different angles. "What if we make the other ear smaller too?"
Alex stared at her. "Your solution is to damage the other side until they match?"
Trixie shrugged. "Then it would look normal."
"That's exactly how people end up turning one bad decision into five bad decisions."
Trixie looked at him suspiciously. "Have you done that before?"
Alex opened his mouth, paused, then pointed toward the hedge. "We're talking about the elephant right now."
Trixie smiled. "That means yes."
Before Alex could answer, another faint crackling sound reached them.
He stopped smiling.
Trixie stopped smiling too.
They looked toward the garden bench, near the hedge.
A small ember glowed along one wooden edge.
Trixie's mouth dropped open. "Oh, come on!"
Alex moved fast, reaching the bench with the extinguisher before the ember became anything serious. A short burst handled the problem, leaving behind a dark scorch mark across one side.
Quiet filled the garden as Alex and Trixie looked at the bench. Then Trixie turned to him and said, "That's her bench."
Alex sighed. "I know."
"Her favorite bench."
"I know that too."
"The one she sits on with coffee."
"Yeah."
"Max is gonna kill us."
"Trixie."
"And she yelled at Caroline when Caroline left her shoes on it."
Alex looked toward her. "You're making this significantly worse."
"I'm just remembering stuff."
"Well, remember quieter."
Trixie pressed her lips together, clearly trying not to laugh.
Alex crouched beside the bench and rubbed at the blackened section with his glove. The scorch mark remained.
Trixie crouched beside him. "Can you buy another one?"
"Of course I can buy another one."
"Then we're fine."
"No, because Max will know."
Trixie frowned. "How?"
Alex pointed toward a little paint smudge near one leg. "Asher dropped his toy truck there a few months back when I was painting the bench, and it left a mark. Max remembers that mark because she told me it gave the bench character."
Trixie stared at the smudge, then at the burn. "That's bad."
"Yes, it is." He agreed.
"Really bad."
"I know."
Trixie stood and looked between the elephant and the bench. "So we burned two of her favorite things while she was sleeping."
Alex rose beside her. "That is an unfortunately accurate summary."
Trixie pointed toward the giant block of ice, which still hadn't completely melted. "And we didn't even finish the ice."
Alex looked at it.
Half the stupid block remained.
He stared at it for several seconds before shaking his head. "I officially hate that thing."
Trixie crossed her arms. "Can we finish burning it?"
Alex slowly looked down at her.
She grinned.
"Trixie."
"I'm just asking."
"Our experiment is over."
"Haaa... Fine." She sighed.
They spent the next twenty minutes trying to make the garden look less like something had gone terribly wrong.
Alex trimmed away some of the worst leaves around the elephant's damaged ear while Trixie carried the cut pieces into a garden bag. Unfortunately, every attempt to improve the hedge seemed to make it look stranger.
Trixie stepped back and tilted her head. "It looks like it got a bad haircut."
Alex lowered the garden shears. "I was thinking the same thing."
"Max is gonna be mad."
"Yes."
"Like really mad."
"Probably."
Trixie looked toward him. "Are you scared?"
Alex gave her an offended look and tried to laugh a bit. "Kiddo, I'm not scared of anyone," He said as his left eye twitched a bit and his voice didn't sound too convincing.
"Are you scared of Max?" Trixie asked with a big grin.
Alex stared at the damaged elephant. Then he stared at the damaged bench. "I have a healthy respect for consequences."
Trixie burst out laughing.
Alex pointed the shears toward her. "You're involved in this too, young lady."
Her laughter disappeared quickly. "Wait, I thought you were gonna take the blame."
"I'll take most of it because I'm the adult who handed a ten-year-old a flamethrower."
Trixie nodded seriously. "That sounds fair."
Alex stared at her.
She smiled innocently.
Alex cleaned the worst residue from the bench, although the burn mark refused to disappear. Eventually, he gave up and stood. "We gotta tell her."
Trixie's eyes widened. "Right now?"
"Before she walks outside and finds it herself."
"Can't we wait until after dinner?" Trixie asked.
"No."
"After dessert?"
"Nope."
Trixie thought about it. "What if we bring dessert while we tell her? You can make one of your fancy desserts, right?"
Alex paused and thought for a moment. She was right. With Max's cravings for sweet things, he could easily make something new and nice for her and then break down the news to her slowly while giving her a nice massage.
"That's actually smart," He said.
Trixie smiled proudly. "I know."
They started walking toward the mansion, still wearing their ridiculous protective suits.
Halfway across the lawn, Trixie slipped her gloved hand into Alex's.
"You're gonna say it was mostly your idea, right?" She asked.
Alex looked down at her. "Yeah, I promised. It's all on me."
Trixie nodded. "Good, because I'm only ten and that sounds really bad for you."
Alex stopped walking.
Trixie kept a completely straight face for about two seconds before she started laughing.
Alex stared at her in disbelief. "You've been spending way too much time with Max."
"She's funny."
"Really?"
Trixie grinned as they started walking again. "You gave me a flamethrower."
Alex considered that.
"Fair point."
They reached the patio just as a sleepy voice came from inside the mansion.
"Alex?"
Both of them froze.
Max walked through the glass doors in a robe, her hair messy from sleep. She looked at Alex, then at Trixie, then at their flameproof suits and the extinguisher. Her eyes narrowed. "Why are you two dressed like you're about to fight Godzilla?" She asked.
Trixie immediately looked at Alex.
Alex looked at Trixie.
Neither moved.
Max stepped outside. "What did you do?"
Alex gave her his most reassuring smile. "Before you get upset, Diana and Aiden are completely fine, the house is fine, and nobody got hurt."
Max's expression changed instantly. "Why the hell would you start with that?"
Trixie slowly moved behind Alex.
Max looked toward the garden and saw the burned and trimmed-down elephant and the bench. Her mouth opened.
Alex closed his eyes for half a second. 'Ah crap!'
Beside him, Trixie whispered just loudly enough for him to hear, "I'm just a ten-year-old kid and good luck."
--
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